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stormy........and even though Dad is forgetful about a lot of things....that doesn't make its okay to talk to any of you the way he talked to your brother. It looks like Dad isn't the only one who forgets.......I need to proof-read and stop leaving things out...:)
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Stormy, due to dad's forgetting the peas, and whatever else he might forget, that stove needs to be accidentally broke, if it's gas, turn the gas off at the main, disconnect the hose and cap the line. capping it will make sure that he can not reconnect the hose. If it is electric, it can be unplugged from the wall, the power cord to it removed.

The microwave is safe up to a point, Toasters are semi safe. Jam, I am glad to hear that things seem to be settling down for you, how's the back doing?

Ladee this get together didn't work as either of us had imagined.. but the Lord apparently had other ideas., personally I haven't figured out what they are yet, but I learned the hard way a long time ago not to argue with him, there is a reason for all this. Even if it was getting to meet you on the side of the road..rofl.. It could be for me to finally really stand up to hubby and tell him no the world doesn't revolve around him, I admit it, I'm a people pleaser and most of the time, he gets what he wants, well this time he ain't getting it. How does you and I having lunch somewhere Saturday sound? Joe can stay home, Glenn can stay home or take his butt for a ride..somewhere and you and I can find us a table back in a corner, have a wonderful lunch and then sit there for a couple of hours just talking.

Ladies and Gentlemen remember no matter what the illness no matter what the relationship, you do not have to take abuse in any way shape or form, and talking to you like crap qualifies as abuse.

Since losing my mom, it's dawning on me more and more that I have been allowing myself to be treated as someone's servant, family or hubby... I've realized I am entitled to a life, to what I want for a change and by God I am going to take it.

Hugs and Prayers for all to have a peaceful and restful day.
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Well Carmen since I sent you a long email suggesting just what you did, maybe we will finally get to do that.... son is doing very good, not having to check on him near as often....I take him to the Ortho Dr. next Monday, then we'll go from there...I just think it is too weird that we are sending messages her on YOU when we are about 10 miles from each other...and yes take back your life.... I am NOT a people pleaser, so will teach you how to stand up for yourself... YEEE HAAA, girl had to come to Texas to learn this.... oh hell yes.... more later, tired , going to lay it down for a little while...
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Did I tell you all that my mil has found aa ALF in Maine? She stopped by after church Sunday, got a quick tour, feels the price is right, and is thoroughly proud of herself and happy. She is excited about moving in and is planning what furniture of hers to take. She has gushed to all the kids in the family, her doctor's asst., and church friends. We may have had to get her primed, but she is now going full bore. God is good........let's hear an AMEN to that!!!!!
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AMEN! AMEN! Woohoo Seeme..know it will be a load off your minds when she follows through.
Dad had to see hematologist today..his RBC was down so he got a procrit shot. Hope it perks him up some. He is just miserable all the way around. Am tired...just from the 4 hours of getting him in and out of car..sitting and waiting and in and out of car again. Glad we are back home and settled..now if he would just poop I would be really happy! Hahahaha
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Zoey ~ It's so hard to try to lovingly tend to someone when they return your efforts with malice. At first I was seething about that every second, but it's helped me to come to terms with the fact that it's my husband's disease that's talking. No matter how much we want them to be "normal" again and return to the real world, it just ain't happening. We are the one's that have to enter their world.

Burned ~ I've come a long way baby. There was a time when I had to have my house spotless when even friends or my adult children stopped by. Now that so much of my time is invested into caring for Alan, my daughter and granddaughter and their husbands stopped by yesterday, and I had to literally push the clutter on the table to the center to allow them to sit coffee cups in front of them--and there were three days' dishes in the sink. And, guess what, the sun came up today. If people don't realize you have priorities, f**k 'em. I think it was Jam that recommends a warm tub and bubbles. Make that bath bubbles AND champagne bubbles!

Jam ~ Oh, my, I remember those days from hell. Oh, yeah, because one of them was just last week. We're just too old for this crap.

Starri33 ~ You are so right about not saving things for special occasions. I used to be like that, but a bout with cancer and my husband's strokes, among several other issues that make my life sound like a soap opera, have pointed out with alarming clarity that every day is special.
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Dad had an ultrasound of his leg today and bloodwork - all came back ok. He's back on oral antibiotics and will need to see a dermatologist if this doesn't get better. I'm so glad it wasn't something worse.
Mom is apparently going to live forever.
So tired - will catch up on posts tomorrow. All day of driving back and forth and waiting for docs - I need some zzzzz's.
Goodnight, and better tomorrows.
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Notlike......too funny....mom living forever.....lol

Vic.....wish you could sleep for a week. Please don't hurt yourself with dad. There is no greater drain on your energy than going to a doctor's office. Why is that?

Stormy...for some reason I thought dad was almost bedridden. Starri did make a couple of good suggestions. I like the unplu the stove one.....even my mil only uses the microwave. While hubby was in Maine, she boiled a pan of water dry on the stove. He did all the cooking. Why hasn't he been placed??

I have watched DWTS with a hot rag on my left eye.......gotta a f'n sty starting. First one ever. I thought it was just pink eye from dust the past weeks with the brickwork being done, but noooooo.......ttyl......

Burned....wishing you a good visit with your daughter. If you ever slow down, you won't know what to do with yourself.
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Hello Everyone, I've been too burned out to even comment. Even now I'm wondering why I just don't crawl in bed. Mom has fallen 2 times in 4 days. She went down the same way she did before. We went to the ER on Sat. and they said there were no breaks. Just really bruised. Said to do everything I was already doing. It doesn't appear the second fall did any more damage to the foot, just more bruises. She hates having anything on her feet, but I've got her in her footies with the rubber grippers. I've spent extra time trying to pamper her, because last night she was crying and said she didn't know what purpose she was serving anymore. That is as hard on me as seeing her on the floor. On the flip side of that, she would have me around her constantly if she could find enough reasons. I was about to come unglued by the time I said goodnight. I sometimes feel like a servant or a robot, like she forgets I'm a human, her daughter, or that I get tired. Well I guess I've said enough. Jam, I'm glad the dog did a turn around, and that Target finally ate some food. I am thinking of all of you, I'm just too burned out right now. Just needed to vent. Thanks to all of you.
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Morning..know where you are Vivian ..prayers for you to get a little rest. Monday we saw a blood blister just below the back of one of dads knees..h
Don't know how he got it but hope it goes away soon.. All night he was calling Tory Tory ...every time I got up he looked at me and said huh? Oh well ...today we have to clean for the cleaning lady..arghhhh guess I better fold bed linens ...
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Oh yea..Notlike..glad dads leg is ok per se..and my mom will probably be right there with yours.. Take care
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Vickie Vic gets the crown today!!! Wear it to bed, sweetie.....wish it meant more than it does........like a week at an amazing spa.....but it just means you are still here..........sure wish you could get some sleep..................
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I have no idea what is going on with mom. She threw up black stuff yesterday and they admitted her to hospital. They had to give her some blood this morning. I forgot what the name of the procedure is called but they are looking down her throat to see if they can find the reason for the blood. I'm assuming it was blood she threw up.
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Yippee Vic!!!!!!! I'm wishing you a day off with lots of sleep.....and wear your crown with pride....:)
Glad to hear tests, etc are coming back and looking good for some of you.

I'm doing a drive-by this morning to let you all know I'm thinking of you.......I hear my name being hollered again!!!! Going to be a long day.................................

Hugs to all!
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dchurchill.......old blood will come back up looking like dark coffee grounds. A newer bleed may just be very, very dark. Let us know how things go please!
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Jam-so good that Target ate! When does he start cooking for you? LOL
Starri-You go, Girl! Abuse is sometimes so easy to take and hard to stop. Hugs.
Seeme - Amen for you!
Vivian - Hugs to you. You have alot on your plate.
Vic-you sound as tired as I feel, and I'm not even doing the physical care you are. I wish we could send all the parents on a trip, and you and I could get a vacation. Hugs.
I slept 8 hours last night, and I am still exhausted today. Too much stress, I think. Spending all those hours with Mom is enough alone to wear me out. Other than her being happy that her cancer isn't growing, there wasn't much nice for the day. Dad needs to move around more and get circulation in his leg, so she was harping on him for that. She thinks she's funny, but she's not. We stopped at the bookstore and she bought herself a crossword puzzle book, and left me to pay for Dad's book. I don't think she even thought about me having to pay for him. More like she wasn't even considering buying him anything. Dad and I ate before we left because she said she would just skip lunch with all the appointments we had. Of course, we had extra time and she got a nice lunch out, while we got snacks. And when we were setting up her next round of appointments, she's agreeing with everything the scheduler is offering, before I've even had a chance to check the master calander or consider my having to leave work. When I tried to talk to her about it later, her comment was I should have told her sooner not to do that. Yikes! I didn't know she was going to do that - how could I have said something before??? That's Mom - she is never wrong and I am never right.
I need to put more distance between me and Mom. Just let her do what she's gonna do, and not try and spend time with her or have anything nice with her. It's not worth the effort. I got no thank you from her for being with them all day yesterday - there's no acknowledgement that I am doing my best to help and be there for her. Not that I expect it, but while she still can say it, it would be nice to hear.
I'll be watching Dad's leg and I need to call the doctor in a week with an update. He is a good doc. Wrote a whole letter, explaining the lab results, and sent it to the computer charting, as well as having his nurse call to let me know it was there. We are blessed with excellent, caring doctors.
On the upside, I have finally found the right bean seeds! Can't wait to plant them. I will be smiling smuggly all summer while they grow. :)
Better get back to work. Hope everyone has a good day.
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church- I am very sorry to hear this about your mom. Please let us know what you find out from the drs. When are ya'll leaving to carrying your mom back to her hometown? I hope she gets to feeling better!!! I know you are worried about her and fazzled from having to deal with all this. My prayers are with you both. Keep in touch with us!! Love and hugs stormyyy
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Jam- I also thought about unplugging the stove, it is a electric stove. Dad told debbie that he would carry the stove out to the yard if they said anything else to him about not turning on the stove. And he told randy not to tell him what to do the other day. Dad is doing some better and that is why we have been letting him stay by his self during the day. And sis would never place him in a nursing home. I don't even think that she would place him if he did have alz/dem. And if his cancer came back or spread i don't think she would call in hospice for his care, cause she would think that we could handle him. But i know that we couldn't cause he weighs 224. And he is 6'2 in height so it would be very difficult for us to lift he or do anything like that he is just too big and tall. And sis has some back problems. I think she would think that we failed him if we had to place him or bring in hospice. I believe she feels guilty for not being able to save our mom that morning she was doing cpr on her but her heart was just too bad she has chf. Well it is time for me to get over there to dads so i better go and start this lovely day. Ugh... Love and hugs. Did your dog die? What happened to him/her?
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Mom had an upper GI endoscopy and found some linear erosion consistent with Cameron's erosions. What ever that means. Any way it appears what ever was bleeding has stopped. They are keeping her tonight again for observation. talked to the dr about traveling to MO leaving fri. They said it will be difficult but it would be OK. Dr. listened to my concerns about not being able to bath her alone at my home and her not having a bm in days. She said she would make sure that was taken care of to make traveling a little more comfortable for her. Also, they don't usually do the full bathing thing but she put orders in for one to be done! Thankfully they understand the need for her to have a chance to see her home and friends.
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Notlike, the more I hear about your mom, the more I am convinced that your mom and Marie are kin somehow.... I told Marie that Sonny needed new underwear, She had THREE closets full of clothes, gets new underwear all the time... and you would have thought I asked for her first born.... I many times just go around her and call her daughter when Sonny needs something... and when he has to go to the Dr. OMG, what an ordeal for her... she goes at least three times a week.... while she was gone to get her hair done today, I gave him a Tylenol, he had been rubbing his hands... he was hurting, but will never tell me, and she will find some excuse to not give him something, so I waited until she left....and as she takes it by spells to talk to me like a dog, she never lets up on him, I intervene many times... it's true that Sonny doesn't remember in three minutes, but I do..... I just pray there is a BA ( Bitches Anonymous) in heaven and they have to go thru some hoops before God opens the gates.... And hopefully God will ask them, do you remember when you said such and such? Well, now I'm going to allow YOU to be on the receiving end of that, so you will know how you made people feel....
We got into yesterday over lunch...she could give a big fat happy damn that my son is still unable to do much for himself.... as long as SHE is tended to....
Vickie Vic, wrote to you this morning about the crown, and my post got lost in cyberspace... so congrats for hanging in here with us and putting up with us all this time.... thought about you and everyone else today.....realizing the one thing that beats down a caregiver is always being TIRED... tired when we go to bed and tired when we get up... if we get to sleep...and then everything that has to enter our brain becomes distorted, we are cranky, short tempered, angry, and on and on... it's the kind of tired no amount of sleep will cure, it is a sign for us to get the hell away for awhile, new scenery, new everything, because our brain can not take one more day of it, yet we do it anyway.... and then we just get bitchy because we are bitchy.... I am so very grateful to know I am not alone, and that Jam created this place for us to come to and just say HI if we can't do anything else.....love ya'll.... hugs and angels.
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Ladee, I just have to say "Amen Sister!".
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Me to
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Morning all...hope the day is as good as it can be for all. Yaay..the crown went to good use! Dad pooped! Hahahaha.. Love and prayers
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Good morning all. Still hanging in there. Fed mom 10 minutes ago, now she's giving me a list of things she wants to eat, think she would eat all day if I could find the time to bring it to her. Right now she wants a pickle and potato salad, lol.
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Vic, yeah for the poop! Loyalty, maybe you should add a pregnancy test to that list. LOL.
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Hey all- I've felt kinda dizzy this morning and my eyes felt glassy and just not right. All this happened while i was driving back home from carrying connor to daycare. I just wanted to hurry back home. Cause it was just making me feel uncomfortable while i was driving. Called sis and asked her if i could come in later at dads cause i didn't want to get back out on the road right now. So she is up there with him now. Been feeling really sleepy too. So i don't know what is causing all of this. It came on me so sudden. Love and hugs stormy
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Ok these were going fine...fine as in relatively ok and no harm being said until last night I had Child Protective Services at my house second time in 2 yrs. They are going to follow up next wk and then Ill know the verdict; trust me this is last straw for my family. I do all that I can yet someone feels I am not being a super mom and this hurts more than anything else that I know of because I am at my breaking my point now because this is ridiculously and mildly retarded...so forgive me if I am not in my usual standard mood. I have been under too much stress to continue this battle and now they are escalating with the threat of removing my kids. I do apologize but I am nearly done and losing all confidence in myself. i need some encouragement and strength so please say some prayers for me.
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Burned, Ive been on this thread for about 3 weeks, and I have read what you are going through. Sheer Hell. I am praying for you. I'm not really a church goer, but I know there is a God. You are under attack by the devil himself for all the good you are doing. I've been sitting here trying to think of something I could say to make it better, but I can't. I am going to have a long talk with God on your behalf. I don't pray enough, so right there says He is using you to draw people nearer to him. Keep us posted. Love to you and your beautiful family.
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Burned who do you think reported you to CPS it seems to me you do more than one human being is able to do with all on your plate-I hope there is someone close to you that can help you-what does your husband think about this?
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So sorry burned......Praying for you and hubby and kids..........
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