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Oh man you are having a tough time with her you need to find someone to take over for a few days or in a home she goes seriously! I will say a prayer for you!
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Wish we could just climb through the screen to give you a hug - maybe one day
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CK,
I can't imagine how difficult that was for you! My mom used to have screaming fits, throwing dishes, anything she could get her hands on. But, it was when she was about 50 years younger, we were young children then. These were absolutely frightening for all of us, but I got to the point that I would just yell at her to stop, roll my eyes, then retreat to the basement. I have no idea where these came from or what set them off. Wonder if they will return as she progresses in this disease. And then, yes, it is facility time!
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Hi - mom passed a couple of hours ago. She passed peacefully.
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Oh Lav my heart aches for you.. I'm so sorry. You've been a loving and supportive daughter. All my love and blessings to you. Hugs and X's...
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Oh Lav, I am so sorry.... loving you across the miles... we are all here for you....
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Join everyone else in sending you a very big hug. You did a wonderful job and I am sure Mom really appreciated your devotion
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Lav, I am so sorry for your loss. You did so much for her, be proud of yourself! There have been so many in the this community the past few weeks. Thinking of all of you.
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Lav you are in my thoughts and prayers. Take care of yourself.
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Lav, I'm soooo sorry. You did your best when it came to your mom. No regrets, no what ifs. And if those thoughts do pop up, take the time to change those thoughts to the reality that you Did your darn best. {{HUGS}}
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Hey Lav, so sorry for your loss. I am sure everyone here feels it - it could be one of us and will be one of these days. I hope you are at peace as your mother is..... keep coming here for a while to vent/ whatever.... I know I have read of a few people who stopped once their family member had passed because they didn't feel like they "belonged" here any more. but you do belong, so keep coming back when you can. we are all thinking of you today and saying prayers for you and your mom.
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Lav so sorry...my thoughts and prayers are with you.
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Hey Lav, just echoing everyone else in saying that I'm so sorry.... And what Book said... You did your very best and that's all anyone can ever do, and all that anyone can ever ask of themselves. I hope that you're at peace knowing that. Your mom knew she was well taken care of all the way. Sure, they drove us nuts, sure we ranted and raved about them while they were alive... Should we feel guilty about that when they're gone? No. Because it was the truth, it's how we felt, and we're human. It doesn't mean we didn't love them. We did, or we wouldn't have done all we did for them and given them the best we had. Be at peace, Lav. Your mom is. And that's a blessing. *squish!*
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I'm so sorry, Lavender. I'm relieved that after all the dreadful turmoil you've been though in the last few days her passing was peaceful. I hope this was some comfort to you. Go gently on yourself. x
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Thank you all for your kind words. I was so apprehensive about how Mom was going to do without the breathing tube. The nurses and everyone was very helpful, After my brother got there they started the process. I could not have the tube removed without him even though he was not there for her or me. They told me that she was going to get Morphine before the removal so she would be in no pain and she would not know that she cannot breathe. After the tube was removed they let us back in the room and we both held her hand and told her that we loved her. It only took about 10 minutes. I was so glad that she had everything taken care of and told me what she wanted. Brother and I went to the funeral home and got things started. Like I said, it was good that it has already paid for.
A friend came by this evening and we watched the saints game. We kept telling Mom to help the saints and they won. She loved the Saints!!!! thanks again!!!!!!!!!
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Lavender, I know there's nothing I can say to make you feel better right now. I understand the emptiness you must be feeling and offer my prayers for you and your mom. As difficult as it may be right now, please try to take a moment to lie down and just get some rest for your mind, body and soul.

God's blessings to you Lav for peace of mind in the days ahead. You did an admirable job in caring for your mom.
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How am I doing today: Somewhat of a newbie to caring for my dad with dementia at my home, but have been on this site for years, since my mom passed actually, 12 years ago. Took care of my husband when he had brain cancer, so I'm familiar with caregiving. Dad is doing okay, it's been a month now since he's moved in. Brother is still the same, same bad attitude and very antagonistic. My dad's friend wanted to come out and see him, I said no problem, he got my brother to come with him because otherwise he wouldn't come out. I'd scheduled a day for them to visit between doctors appointments and dad's routine to keep things calmer, they showed up the day before, unannounced, first thing in the morning before dad was even out of bed. My dad's friend who's in his 90s had to drive as my brother refused to drive and burn the fuel. Typical. It was all about do you like it here, would you rather be in a nursing home, etc.... Brother thinks I'm getting money for this. I showed my brother dad's last hospital release papers showing he's diagnosed with dementia, and upper respiratory infection, told him if he wants to see dad anytime let me know, if he wants to know anything just ask.

I expect things to get worse soon though, brother is all about money and control, who's going to have it, I'm DPOA for dad and he's in my care. Dad will not be able to live on his own and he can't drive anymore. His home is in serious disrepair with a cracked foundation on all corners and his house is sagging, Dad has said he wants to have an auction this Spring in March, I'll arrange that and will be in charge of it, and that's when the impending true you know what will hit the fan for my brother, years of smart remarks and threats from him are going to backfire on him big time and hard. He's also removed things from dad's house that are to be auctioned. I'm wondering how he'll react actually. He'll be very angry, but he's too cheap to hire an attorney, even if he did, they'd have to argue somehow against me being dad's DPOA, and there just isn't any argument for that, brother isn't fit. It's bad enough as caregivers we give up so much to care for our loved ones, then to have to be in the middle of a war during it as well, just sucks frankly, I just keep telling myself it is what it is, and nothing will last forever.
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Maybe when my brother realizes that whatever dad has financially, has to go to pay for his care, nurses, copays and potentially a nursing home down the road, that there will be nothing left financially, maybe he'll just go away since it seems that's all he cares about it money.
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Like I have said thank all for your prayers and support it has been like a warm blanket around me in the cold. I am going to walk this morning. I know that will make me feel better and since the bread in the fridge has gone stale I have some to feed the ducks. I forgot to tell you what happened when my friend and I were watching the game last night. My friend and I watched the game in my moms room because I always watched it in there with mom. We were in there and my cat walked in. Jazzy took one look at my friend and gave her a second look. It was like who are you and where is the other one. It was so funny. Jazzy knew something was wrong all week. Well, I am off too walk. take care of YOU. I am.
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Lav, love you!!! Its going to be different, but that doesn't mean it's going to be bad....no one could have been present for your mom like you were.... and still are.... make sure you get on here and tell us how you are doing.... we are still caregivers when it's all done.... and we understand the loss of a constant routine that kept us tired, edgy and overwhelmed.....like I said, it will be different, but we are here for you.... enjoy your walk... and Who Dat did awesome last night..... thanking mom for that last second field goal!!!!! lots of love and hugs Lav.... you are amazing...
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I'm so glad to hear you've got Jazzy in your life, Lavender - now I really know you're not alone x
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Lav I am so sorry-you took care of Mom very well and you were there at the end-I was not so good I had been in the hospital 24/7 for a week and was in her room but did not expect her to leave as fast as she did and was reading and missed her last breathe-I feel awful about that-she never was a warm and fuzzy person so I was not holding her hand and I really expected her to hang on long enough for my sister to get there but was caught up in traffic so I had to call her and tell her Mom had died but I knew that morning is was going to happen-as I nurse I had a sense when someone was about to die and liked DNR's because that gave us a chance to just hold their hand if alone and not use the crash cart.
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My husband was in rehab almost 100 days then the hospital a few days and after he died my cat started sleeping on his bed-cats are smart-a NH near here has a resident cat who knows when someone is near the end and climbs up in bed with them and stays close to them as they are passing.
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Green Bay and Chicago today. BRRR! Go Green Bay, then Go Broncos next week. Hopefully, Peyton will take the team to finish this year!
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Hey Glad wishful thinking!!! Go Patriots!! :)
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love those football games when they get boring I have my Nook handy-and my honey unless the roads are bad then just my Nook-my cat loves football.
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Lav you really are amazing. Love your attitude! Love you too. Mom was truly blessed.
Now what is it with you guys about football. A bunch of grown men racing around and beating each other up
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Tomorrow marks 90 days since my mom died in my arms in our home. I left town for a month with our dog. I stayed at my sister's (and her family) in Virginia for a few weeks and then my sister, our dog, and my 5-year-old great nephew did a roadtrip to Mississippi to celebrate some birthdays and the new year with my brother and his wife and their 4 children. So many people around these past weeks - yet I felt still utterly alone most of the time. Everyone goes on with their lives like nothing has changed, yet everything has changed. Our mom has died. My dog and I are back home, alone, now. Being around my sister and seeing her life up close and personal and being around my brother and seeing his life up close and personal made me realize many things - one of which is - I am utterly alone. How is it possible for 90 days to go by and I am still here. I want my life with my mom back.
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The painful wound is still open and raw. Everytime you touch it the throbbing starts again. Your Mom's things are still all around you and her room is still the same. you know you have to clear things up but you can't face it just yet so don't. Hold her things her clothes, her hair brush and let those tears roll, they need to come out. buy something she really liked like flowers and really enjoy them or prepare her favorite food and eat it on her bed. some people sleep in a loved ones bed for a while and find it helps too. The more you experience the grief the faster you will be able to move on, you kind of disperse the pain. It will never go away, she will always be there and visit in your dreams. you are not alone your dog is with you and now you are back home he/she misses your Mom too so don't forget him/her. A nice walk or a play with a ball might cheer you both up. Do you still work. If not try and get out of the house for a while even if you only go to the library to read the newspaper if mom had hospice and even if you didn't they have a grief councilor you can talk to. Ours has breakfast meetings and other activities you could join when you feel strong enough. Take each day one at a time it is all very new now. if you don't do anything else come here and talk. You have come here and reached out that was a good first step.
Blessings
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Lav...sorry for being in so late in my condolences in your loss. Sending love and prayers your way.

Mom has been better since thursday night. My brother returns from his vacation tomorrow so maybe that will help a bit. She still isn't sleeping well. Getting her a neurologist to check her out to see if they can help somehow. Her pain is the problem so maybe if neurologist can't give any extra help a pain clinic will have to help. We are in deep freeze...I haven't even gone outside yet but I need to go shovel the front here shortly while I have supper cooking. Also taking her to the foot doctor soon. She didn't sleep real well last night but has caught up a little today in a nap this morning. Now that the holidays are over, I have cleaned up christmas stuff in my house maybe this will settle h er...all weekend she didn't even recognize being at her house. Kept asking me when we were going home....its sad. She has these emotional outbursts but has always had them because of her brain injury.
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