Follow
Share
Read More
This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Find Care & Housing
PC123 I feel for you - must be awful not to have confidence in your - well, colleague, I suppose she is, is she? I should pull her up on things sooner rather than later, don't you think?
(3)
Report

G takes a half or a whole once or twice a day. Other cg has told me she takes them for "lupus" but recently lost her insurance and can't afford them. It's just hard to keep track of how many are going to G cause sometimes it's not charted.I personally think all those drugs should be locked up. I did bring it up to C her husband but he didn't get where I was coming from. Kinda just said, that's weird just throw it away. I think it's time to talk cause, the family has made comments about her forgetfulness and her care is lacking.
(4)
Report

PC123 ... if it were me (and it has been on, occasion) I'd set up a logging system, if there isn't one already. Create a daily "To Do" list (this should especially be done with the meds), that has room for comments, then list everything that you find. If *she* fails to make her own notes, it's more evidence of her failure to perform her duties. I'd inform the family that you're feeling the need to be more formal, without laying down specific accusations .. "As (your client/patient) becomes more fragile, it becomes more and more important to be able to track what we've done to keep her healthy and prevent issues from arising, but when things DO go wrong, we can give our records to the doctors." THEN, when/if your co-worker builds up a pattern, you've got documentation to back up your observations.

Good luck!!
(5)
Report

I also set up a med log... no one used it but me.... and I finally handed the meds back to the family... saying that I did not want the responsibility of an overdose..... C was on three anti's and three different pain meds four times a day..... and drinking on top of that... so yes, try 'the log.... and at least put your own dispensing in there.... you have a different situation than I did.... like LadeeC said, then you can chart any changes that have a pattern.... hope something works out for you.... they apparently do not "get" your concerns.... I can relate... they have no idea what a great caregiver they have in you... sure hope they don't keep abusing that...... hugs and let us know what happens..
(5)
Report

As LadeeM said keep a log for yourself but also count the pills in the bottle every shift, then you can see how many are being used daily.
(5)
Report

I did posted this one on other thread, here is my thought....

PC, Can you talk to other CG or client's family about pain med how it got there, could be client dropped ? Those pill are should charted or documented each time whoever administrated and who does order Rx? , Specially like us from outside caregiver. My case I and new cg do count pills ( Xanax, Zoloft) each time new caregiver came to my client(Ms J).
When I start this job my client's meds was all in bathroom med cabinet.... I saw Ms J was trying to open Rx for herself that she already had taken, since then I moved all her meds to CG's room.... Her family member was so surprise that Ms J was let me move her meds!! It has been almost 2 years, no problem yet!!! Like LadeeM( hi Linda) said CYA...... Good luck !!
(4)
Report

ABB - There was a lot of times I almost lost it with Mom. She could be so mean. She came after my computer with a knife sharpener(it was very heavy). I said go ahead and left the room. When she figured out that I did not care she backed down. She got physical with me a couple of times but I just left the room or just screamed bloody murder. That got her attention. I hope it gets better for you. Good luck with the job/apartment hunting. I have to do the same thing. Take care of YOU!!
Book - Wow, I am glad your father finally saw reason and wanted to go to the doctor. I am sorry you have to go through so much. Good luck with the doctor tomorrow. I hope you have time to enjoy some good books. Take care of YOU!!!
Taheil - Welcome. This place has been a life saver. In 2012 I was at my wits end. These people here dragged me out of the muck. Keep checking in here. The important thing is to TAKE CARE OF YOU!!!
LadeeM - at one point I was washing my panties in the sink. LOL I wish you luck with evening work. Take care of YOU!!
Hi there - Here I am apologizing for not keeping up with you guys. The house has been listed to be sold as of today. The agent sounded very hopeful that he would sell it fast. He even asked me if I have been looking for another place. I wish I could get 1/2 a shotgun house. That would be great but the rent is high on those. I really do not want to live in a box. I have been working my you know what off getting the house ready. It is unbelievable the stuff that was in this house. Mom never threw anything away. The house has not looked this good for a while. My bro and I are getting along for once and working together getting things done. Would you believe that the succession still has not gone through. Jazzy is still not looking good. She is just kind of moping around. I am giving her anything she wants to eat. Just so she eats. I went to whole food and got some really healthy food to eat tonite. Please take care of YOU All.
(1)
Report

We do charting with meds, but I have to go over and correct times, call other cg to see if she administered. It's a pain in the you know what!!! For that specific pill to be found in the bathroom raised a flag. My client is bed ridden so it wasn't her. Her husband leaves them in her room if she doesn't take them. I grill them "literally" who gave what and when. I can't count cause of the charting issues of forgetting to chart. I just don't want anything on me. So how do I bring up locking up the narcotics? Family has already said stuff about the lack of cleaning, at least to me, they notice. Especially today. The daughter put dishes away while I was talking to C. Said half were dirty. I have said to just let me do them. Goes unheard.. I have taken to writing down in a book things that happen everyday. Also, the tension between other cg and daughter is horrible and they both put me in the middle! I get along with them all. Basically, just don't wanna start an issue about meds. But it's wrong if someone is sneaking cause who would know. And like I said I don't want to be wronged. Other cg is going on 3 years, me 1. God, what a mess....
(0)
Report

PC123 Don't ever ever correct another's charting. You can make another entry that says something like "no charting done for 1400 hrs medications Patient due for XYZ"Contacted other cgr and she stated meds given at 14.30"
If you want to continue to be a caregiver licensed or not you have to make an issue.If the patient is unreliable or incapacitated no meds should be in her room unless in a locked cupboard that she does not have acess to the key.
Narcotics should be out of the room again locked never in a bathroom because of the humidity.
There is already an issue over this so you have to protect yourself. If you and other cg cover 24/7 the key to those narcotics should be passed person to person, there are other people in the house with acess so don't dismiss anyone. If a family member watches the pt on your day off count the pills before and after your break. if there are more than 2-3 missing begin to wonder.If you count the narcotis note the number of each count on the chart and initial it When I had my hip replaced I had a one week supply of vicodin which I did keep at my bedside, However I knew I would not remember what time I had taken the last pill so I wrote down every single dose I had taken. These days I take multiple medications and fill a pill box once a week so I know if I miss anything.
You can decide to do nothing and not rock the boat or you can pull up your big girl panties and start by putting a tracking system into place even if someone gets offended. Keep out of the cleaning the family has already noticed that problem. You have been there long enough for the family to know the quality of your work.other cg may rally need the pain meds which is a reason her work is suffering. Encourage her to sign up for the Affordable Care Act she should be able to find a plan she can afford. I believe it is easier and quicker than applying for Medicaid. If she can get a prescription a generic narcotic will cost less that $10 from somewhere like Walmart.
(3)
Report

PC, I agree with everything Veronica said...there are times to be nice, and then there are times to cover your ass..... especially about narcotics.... but you see that I got accused of something atrocious..... and in the end, it doesn't matter if you rock the boat or not.... when it is time to make a stand for yourself, you have to do it... I walked away from that job with no notice.... by that point I could give a rat's ass if the family had to spin and twirl to get things taken care of...I am all I have at the end of the day.... and I choose for my integrity to still mean something..... if you have concerns.... then address them with the family... if nothing is done.... then the message being sent is they don't want to deal with it... fine... but it is NOT your job to deal with it either... stop enabling her to keep messing up........ you aren't helping her, only putting more on yourself that will not be appreciated in the long run.... as Lav says.... take care of YOU !!!
(3)
Report

PC, Are you afraid to loose your job? why I'm asking you this.... when we became paid cg, it is always client and their family are RIGHT!!!, specially when we are having disagreements. If you do feel uncomfortable you should move on? I was with my client 15 years who he had a MS, unfortunately he passed in 2008. I had a very good relationship with his family and trusting me to do my job as his caregiver. My next job for about 2 years was having problem with my client's daughter,so I left... currently working for over 2 years with 91 years old who has age related problems and her wonderful caring family.
(2)
Report

PC Ladee and veronica are experienced and wise women and STP is also experienced and I would listen to them I had a head nurse steal meds where I worked she knew I set my meds up early and locked them in the pt's lock box-she gave herself away and I was able to replaced the meds from the hospital's pharmacy and she never did it again but when I left in my exit review I presented notes I had written for over a year and gave it to the Director of Nurses and she was demoted soon after -you have to protect yourself at all costs.
(1)
Report

Book and all-
I have just realized that notifications of AC activity have not been pushed as they had been. I just went back about 30 messages to see that Book's dad finally agreed to go to the doctor two days ago. So, I guess he went yesterday. Book, how did it go with the doc? Hope all is well with him and maybe he is in the hospital for a bit? If so, enjoy the quiet for awhile! Update us.
(1)
Report

Book I also forgot to ask about your Dad -he must feel really sick to agree to see a doc-let us know how it is going.
(1)
Report

I do sympathize with you professional caregivers having to deal with lazy coworkers and families that demand you go way past the call of duty, plus trying to cover yourself in case someone is dipping into the patients med supply. As a family member caregiver those are issues that I don't have to deal with. This is difficult enough at times caring for someone that I've had a great relationship with over the years and remember when she was in her prime. Although it is because of those things that I go on a super guilt trip when I start to have negative thoughts about what all I have to do and the sacrifices that we make in our personal lives in order to be here to care for her on a 24/7 basis. Then I kick myself in my lazy backside, put on my big girl panties and take care of business...sending hugs and kudos to all of you who choose to do this for a living...I'm pretty sure I don't have what ever it is that you must have to do this every day for people that you've never had a relationship with before. As a young girl I always thought I wanted to become a nurse when I grew up...then spent some time in the hospital and realized they deal with all the things I find most disgusting in life (vomit-excrement-urine-blood-mucus-pus) every day with people who are at their worst (unless you work in a maternity ward) although I coached my younger sister through a delivery and could have crawled up on that table and had both of my kids over again with less effort than that took. I've seen nurses do every thing they could to try and comfort a patient and get nothing but verbally abused for their trouble. Decided that was not for this gal, and glad I figured it out before I had invested any time or money in the training it would take to get there. Thank you for what you do...LOL, if this goes on for much longer I may be looking to hire one of you to come take care of me...((HUGS))
(3)
Report

Thanks ladies for all the advice. I'm a charter, chart every single pill down to the exact time. Family has noticed care from other cg slipping. I want a pill box with her pills for the day and the rest locked up. The sad thing is, is other cg has been around for years. She's great at some things, but slacks in a lot. I don't know if I should bring up the pill in the bathroom to the daughters. C didn't seem to understand my point. How and why is it there? Been there almost a year and never had that. Especially cause G will take all or no meds....Now we have a bottle of oxys... I know I'm gonna be the blame. I have a great relationship with all the family. Other cg don't and I know it bugs her. I guess all I can do is my job and if I feel like things aren't right speak up....
(1)
Report

Hi all... just stopping by to say hello... each day gets a little easier. I'm even considering going back to work as a caregiver... I know... I know... not what anyone would have expected, but it's a distinct possibility. :) A friend of mine is a caregiver and her company is hiring... she immediately thought of me...

Kids are doing well... hubby is too... My Tupperware business is growing, and I've finally purchased the quilting machine I wanted. I know it's the right one, because while I was sitting there playing with it, I thought, "this is the one"... then I heard my mom (just as plain as day) telling me it was the right one to get!

I'm headed off to do a Tupperware party this evening. I will go through the previous posts later this evening to catch up on everyone's news. Hope all is well with everyone. I miss you all.

Have a GREAT evening!
(3)
Report

P.s. on a good, off topic side note... I got to watch my niece be brought in the world today. You appreciate the creation of life much more when you daily taking care of someone ready to leave this world. Bittersweet!
(2)
Report

PC.... you'll do the right thing and you'll know when it's time to speak up... just trust yourself... and cya..... I know you like this family.... and it is hard to leave or make waves....but we can't have bad stuff following us to our next job....

Laura.... hello to you!!!! good to hear from you and happy to hear your business is doing well and you and mom agreed on the quilting machine.... lol....

You will know two hours after you are your first caregiver job if this is what you really want to do.... It's very different in some ways of taking care of a parent...but I am trying to get to the other side of being a little jaded right now....

Red, thanks for the kudos..... and ya, not everyone can clean up a bm from someone they've never met before..... and I have had other jobs that I was appreciated... not like this last fiasco..... but hey, lessons learned, and that's what life is all about...

I don't know if I told ya'll that I will start work after the first of next month... I have chosen to work nights... am too burned out from being 'Ms. Stepnfetchit', so will try this for a change..... will be taking a pay cut, but will get more hours, so it will all work out.... I'm sure I'll get bored.... but will see if it's ok to take some of my craft junk with me....

I am finding that I am still soooo tired... maybe some of it is residual crap from what all happened.... and not going to get full severance.... but will be grateful for what I do get and make do....

Hope everyone had something to be grateful for today... love and hugs...

Oh, and I didn't know Books dad went into the hospital either..... has anyone heard from her????
(1)
Report

And congrats on the new baby Auntie PC!!!!!!!! what a beautiful present from God to get to be a part of that..... lots of hugs to you...
(1)
Report

Congrats on the new job Ladee M must be warm and sunny in Texas by now so get that grass in your front yard cut before the city gives you a citation.

Pc stop worrying about that 1/2 Vicodin. patient or hubby could have dropped it in her room and someone picked it up on their shoe and it fell off in the bathroom. Going forward concentrate on making sure all are accounted for and if not you know what you have to do. keep quiet for now. You told the husband that relieves you of responsibility on that one. Just don't cover up for the other cg, the family already sees she is slipping so it is up to them to take action
(4)
Report

Jennifers – it’s a privilege? I agree that the person was never a full-time caregiver who handled all the ups/downs/anger/violence/all-nighters, etc… And I guess it depends on your relationship prior to the dementia. Let’s just say that my mom passed away last year, and I’m still waiting for my perception to change and view it as a “privilege.”
(1)
Report

I persuaded him to go when it was a Wednesday. But, they ended up setting an appointment for Thursday. Thursday morning came, and he was already trying to tell me that there’s no need to see the doctor. I basically told him that he’s going because his butt sore is sinking in and I absolutely refuse to clean a hole in his butt. He’s going. He went. He’s now on antibiotic IV and prescribed 2 pills Levofloxacin and Prednisone. Due to his over-use of herbals, he’s basically broken out with big hives all over his body, scratching constantly and causing it to bleed. As I mentioned earlier, I’ve confiscated 2 of his herbals that I know for sure he’s had bad reactions to. But, because his rashes/hives are still going strong, another pill is causing it. I suspect he overloaded his body with these meds, that his body immunity has gone awry.

It’s a daily struggle to remain firm in not giving in to his demands for his pills. AND the doctor told him to stop taking all those pills. Of Course, he’s not listening.

Sis told me that the nurse will do home visits and that they will clean his bedsore, not me. I repeated it to her. She said yes. Well, every time I change his pampers, his bedsore is leaking that brownish pus. For me to NOT clean it for 24hrs… I think that would make it become infected (if it’s not infected yet.) This morning, I Tried not to look at it and the gross pus leaking out. I caved in. My conscience told me that I needed to change the gauze. It was really really gross because I didn’t change it lastnight.

The nurse came today. She loves doing wound-care. She was digging in there cleaning it with a qtip and gauze while father kept making painful noises. He does this all the time when I clean it too. Even to lightly touch it, he moans. Yet, he doesn’t want to change lying positions every 2 hours. I told her that I was instructed not to clean it. But, I think I should because it gets really gross if I don’t clean it. I told her that I can’t stand cleaning it because it’s gross but I have to clean it anyway. I did get queasy seeing the gauze and then the qtip get blood on it. She totally agreed with me. She said that it is best to try to keep it as clean as possible. I told her how I change, clean it, etc.. And she said that I’m doing it correctly and I can continue to do so – just don’t put any Calmoseptine.

Dad said that the doctor kept talking to oldest sis – instead of directly to him. He said that the doctor thinks he’s crazy. I replied, “You saw the wrong doctor. You saw mom’s doctor not yours. He’s not an old person doctor. When I took mom to him, he asked me so many questions about mom that he should know about.” He did not go to his doctor (the one who does home visits) because she’s a Female. She doesn’t know much like a Male doctor. But this female doctor actually looks at him, listens to him and talks TO him and not as if he’s not there. But noooooo. He wants a Male doctor – so he went to mom’s doctor. And since this doctor is not familiar with old people (nutritionist doctor), he looked to sis with his questions, comments, etc….
(1)
Report

LadeeM glad to hear you have a new job already.. Enjoy the few days of freedom you have left....
Book ewww.. I wouldn't want to clean that yucky wound either, but at least he saw the doctor....

Mom went a whole week with no panic attacks!! But the last 3 mornings not so lucky!! Dementia has a mind of it's own!!

It's been warmer here actually 50 yesterday and today! Doesn't look so hopeful for next week though!! Spring can't come soon enough for me......
(1)
Report

LadeeM, congrats on the new job! Here's hoping that this one is as hassle free as it gets!

Book, I admire you. You are a very strong person. I don't know if I could do what you have to do, I really don't.
(1)
Report

Sigh.... I'm not that strong. I'm the default person. Sis is not going to do it. Dad is not going to do it. So, I end up doing it. When that bedsore sinks into his muscle and goes in deep to the bone.. I will draw the line. Someone is going to have to clean the wound. That's why I am very aggressive when I see the beginnings of a bedsore. But HE doesn't listen to me. Nor the nurse. Nor the doctor. HE knows best than anyone in this world.

He's also shedding skin. Every time I change his pampers, I find his skin all over the bedding. The ants seem to be attracted to his dead skin. Ugh!! Every time I see those skins on the bedding, I think "snake." Snakes shed their skin, my dad is shedding his. I was telling the nurse that his skin is shedding all the time. I spent a long time this morning scrubbing off his dead peeling skin.

She took the peroxide, poured some on the gauze and she proceeded to Scrub his back, peeling off the dead skin. Then she took another gauze, and used that to wipe off the skin. I asked her if I should do that too. She said no. She did not put any lotion or A&D cream on it. Tonight, when I changed his pamper, I was amazed. No shedding skin! His back was soooo smooth. Amazing what peroxide can do! (FYI, you can also use peroxide to clean your toilet tank.)

The nurse made me feel so uncomfortable. She told my dad twice that he has a beautiful daughter. Later, she said that I have white teeth. Boy, sounds like I'm a horse being inspected by a prospective buyer....
(4)
Report

Oh Book accept the compliments! You deserve them! Everyone needs a pat on the back once in awhile!!!! Hugs..
(3)
Report

Ladee M good for you on the job -hope this one is good for you-you certainly deserve a good job for all that you have gone through in the past-I sure hope they appreciate you for the person you are-keep us all posted my dear friend.
(2)
Report

LadeeM, good to hear about the new job! Hopefully it is for someone that sleeps well at night and not an up all night wanderer!
(2)
Report

PC - You are doing the right thing. Congrats on being an Aunt. It must have been wonderful to experience a new life coming into the world. Take care of YOU!!
Book- I still do not know how you do it. It is a shame that it all has to fall on you. Mom hated it when her doctor would turn to me instead of her. I would just ask her what she thought about whatever it was. Yes, you are a beautiful daughter. Take care of YOU!!
Veronica - Hey there. You gave some great advise to PC. Take care of YOU!!!
LadeeM - Hey there. Congrats on the new job. It will be a new experience for you. It will be a great time to do some crafts. Take care of YOU!!!
Laura - Good to see you again. I hope you are enjoying quilting again. I wish I could but some Tupperware from you I need it. I feel Mom being around me now. Take care of YOU!!!
Assand - I hope your Mom's panic attacks do not get so bad. It is hard to watch them go through those. Take care of YOU!!!!!!
Hi all - Well, the house is ready to be shown. I went through my closet last night. I wound up with three bags of trash. It was all my mom's stuff. I saw the trash men as I was backing out of the driveway this morning and said thank you to them. They smiled and said your welcome. LOL Mom's friends are calling asking how I got the house ready so quickly. I told them that I had too. They thought I would stay here. Why would I want to stay here without my Mom. I did come across an old embroidery project that I did not finish and will start working on it today. I went out and bought Jazzy her favorite Fancy Feast food and some catnip. I put down some catnip for her and she rolled around in it. She still has a kitten in her. Thank God !!!! I will be going to the Krewe of Barkus tomorrow. It is a parade for dogs and their owners. Most of the dogs are from shelters around the area and they dress them up in little costumes. I will definitely bring my camera. You all take care of YOU!!!!
(4)
Report

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter