The Caregiver... How are YOU doing today?

At the top of this new feed there is a heading that says caregiver forum. There are drop down boxes that say questions and discussions Go under discussions. At bottom of list it says more discussions... click on that. The title is chicken soup for the caregivers soul! Thanks reddo!

found it...
thanks

Ladee M and standing alone, I loved reading your posts. I have a brother in law who says i'm a hermit because i never get out. Like one of you said, people who think I'm abnormal for doing what I feel is normal was right on target. Before 89 year old mom moved in this was my life....My husband would go to work, I have MS so if I felt tired I would go back to bed, after taking care of my dogs. I would get up and do what I could, whether it be going to the store, working outside, watching T.V., whatever I wanted. This was my life, my solitude, I do not have friends, nor do I care that I don't. I'm 58, I've had many, many friends in the past but I am not a social person either, rather be alone than worry about keeping in contact, keeping a lunch date, saying something that might offend. I and my husband are my best freinds. I don't like to be tied down to a time to meet someone, I don't like parties and I see my husband's family once a year at Christmas, we have a wonderful time and we see each other again in a year. My family is scattered and I see my son once a year unfortunately because he is in Calif. and I am in Indiana. I did what I wanted when I wanted. Like someone said, I needed no ones permission. My husband is an angel and when he came home from work I greeted him with a kiss, we ate dinner and watched TV until bedtime. Bedtime was cuddle time and then I'd get up the next morning and start all over again. Then my promise to my mother that I would take care of her when the time came came to fruition,. I thought "this won't be too hard, I mean we got along, she was alttile demanding and manipulative, we lived in the same town in Florida and i worked two jobs but she managed to make me feel guilty if I didn't spend the amount of time she felt was necessary. Then when i moved to Indiana, we talked on the phone and it was good. Then I started to worry about her when she reached age 87 and started the process of getting her here. At the time my step daughter and 3 year old grandson with emotional problems due to his mother being in an abusive relationship plus my husbands friend lived here already. So, being a loner and loving my solitude and peace I was already frazzled when she moved in. From day one she demanded things and cried if she wasn't getting enough attention, treated me like I was still in high school, said things to my step daughter and grandson that was none of her business, was sarcastic, critical and just a pain in the neck. Mind you she is healthy, save for her bad eyesight and almost stone deaf. She is of sound mind, most of the time. Her idea of living with her own daughter was that we were going to do everthing together, and that living here should be like a vacation to her, Having her here brought up feelings and made me realize that she never really changed, she had always been this way, which is why I left my parents house when I was 19. Over the years our relationship was fine because I wasn't with her everyday. Now I am. My step daughter has moved on and my husbands friend has moved out and now it is the three of us. Solitude? What is that? Sometimes I get up at 4 in the morning and drink some coffee and sit on the couch alone knowing that this is the only time I have to be alone,, During the warmer months I'd walk outside for a long time just to get away from her. I lost 60 pounds because all my life she goaded me about my weight, now it was my turn to show her I could be in control of my food intake and weigh less than her, plus I lost my appetite. Now instead of going to bed and sleeping soundly, I go to bed and think, think of how much I'm going to hate getting up and going thru the process of keeping her happy, keeping her busy so she isn't bored, taking her to the store so she can get out of the house, listeneing to the TV, which i never did, i'm not a television person either, on volume 100 because she lost her hearing aids when she drove her car and went to the store like i asked her not too, and these were brand new. Take her to dr appointments, library, hair salon, nail salon, where ever she wants to go. If I nap too much she gets pissy. If I leave for the day with my husband on his day off she gets pissy, if i don't eat lunch with her she gets pissy, if i raise my voice because she can't hear she thinks i'm being nasty. She also has a nice chunk of money in the band but bitches all the time because we're family and she shouldn't have to pay rent. She does things to annoy me, she's cold, tells people off at the stores then tells me off because I get upset. I now have to set out her meds for her because she can't see. She hid her car keys and took off with her car and side swiped mine on the way out of the driveway., I cry when I go to bed instead of cuddling with my husband. She expects me to cook because she pays rent. She tells me I'm cold and nasty, but honestly I don't like her anymore and I'm not sure that I ever really did, because she was always a negative, sarcastic person., She does things that I've asked her not to and when I asked her why she said because she knew it annoyed me. Yet she wants to always be with me. She wants the daughter mother dynamic but on her terms. I'm not nasty, i just have to yell to talk to her until her new hearing aids come in. Tonight was the last straw. My husband got out early and our grandson wanted us to come to his house and go for a hike in the woods,, Mom shuffles when she walks (more so around me because she knows it annoys me) she can't see, so we didn't invite her to go along,. We had the most awesome time,. We explored the woods, found new creeks and ponds, heard owls in the woods, then my step daughter made dinner, we played with our grandson and it was a perfect evening. On the way home I was my usual quiet self knowing what was coming,. I was right. When I brought her bedtime pill to her room sighing all the way up the staits because I knew she would complain she did the manipulative act of why didn't you bring me. She kept it up until I lost it and told her I needed to get away. She told me my husband should have gone I should have stayed home with her, We proceeded to have the biggest fight and screaming match we ever had. A s****y ending to a beautiful day. And this is how it is whenever we go somewhere without her. We've talked about this and have hashed out over the last year and a half and she still gets me so upset, which isn't good for people with MS or anyone fo that matter, I got nauceous. I couldn't sleep. I cried, not because I felt bad for her but for her putting me through what she's put me thru for 58 years. My solitude is gone,. My privacy is gone, I'm an unhappy shell, walking on egg shells in my own home, it's a war zone. She doesn't appreciate all that I do, just complains about what i don't do. And tomorrow I'm breaking my promise. I'm looking for a facility where she can live and have people her own age for friends and trained care givers that will tend to her needs. She won't be happy, but my husband I will and I will get my solitude back.

Cindy, I feel you. I think the hardest part of the whole care giving role for me was not being able to get the solitude and quiet I needed. When you're raising kids you can always snatch a nap, but with an elderly parent, that isn't always possible. Most of the time I got my nap/alone time in with my mom because it was an absolute necessity for me. If I didn't get any sleep and/or alone time in the afternoons I'd end up feeling physically ill. Even if it was just for a short time, those snatched quiet moments were a huge help.

You shouldn't feel uncomfortable in your own home. There's no worse feeling. To me, that's a sign that somethings got to give, to change.

I believe in caring for th elderly. I believe it's a good thing to keep them in their own homes, at least in the beginning/middle stages of alz, if that's possible. But I don't think people should take this job on by themselves, or be required to ever look after an advanced alz patient alone. That was a scary ride for me personally. I had to handle and deal with things that I wasn't medically, or mentally, equipped to handle. Maybe I'm just a wuss, but I feel completely battered mentally after this whole journey. I'm not one of those types that runs to the doc to stock up on the latest new meds. The younger crowd especially in today's world seem to have their own small pharmacies going if what I'm hearing in other forums is any indication. I'm not one to do that. I don't like taking too many meds. But right now, I feel I should be on something. It's like I'm completely falling apart right now to the point where I can't function. I've been out of the loop so damn long there's a part of me that's scared to death at the thought of having to get out in this alien place... The energy it's going to require for me to get to that point is a lot more than I have. My reserves of everything are dried out. I'm one hell of a mess. All I want to do is be left alone, be quiet and rest and sleep. I feel a need for healing on so many levels.

Care givers need a whole lot more help than they're getting, that's simple truth. Again, I believe in caring for the elderly and making sure that they're looked after, making sure they're safe and comfortable and aren't alone. But there should be so much more help, so many more options, for the elderly so that care givers don't find themselves one step away from keeling over. Hard road, indeed.

I'm glad the doc in the other thread is here now. It makes me feel as though someone really CARES what's going on with elderly people and their families and will really listen to the people here about what it's really like being locked behind closed doors with them . Most people have no clue what a care taker of an elderly alz/dementia patient deals with every day, or what kind of workload that is, or how many working, yes working, hours that really translates into, or what it's like to be on call 24/7, for months, years. No company in the US could legally work you as hard as you'll work in the care giver role, nor could they ever get away with working you 100+ hours a week, and a lot of times without pay. That's pretty much what it comes to. Nobody should have to work that hard, that long, ever. The consequences for the care taker is just too d**n high. Doctors shouldn't just be looking into what's good for the elderly, they should be taking a good, long look at their care takers. I don't think doctor's really think about the repercussions to care takers who are literally chained in an alz world, sometimes for years. That's bound to induce a little crazy to come out of just about anybody. And thank God you guys understand that kind of crazy. :)

Anyway, I have no idea what got me started on that little tangent... I'm tired, frazzled and babbling.

It would be nice if, as care takers, we got at least two days off a week, like any other job. Some parents don't like or enjoy an adult daycare. Aides aren't nearly enough. I guess I'm wishing for the moon. And what about some courses adult kids could take that could, in some way at least, prepare them for alz and dementia? Nothing can really prepare you for that ever changing alz world, but it might give people like me enough of a head's up that we aren't left feeling like we've just come out of a torture chamber... Alz, to be honest, was a little too much harsh reality for me. Too painful. Too sad. Too...everything. It's an experience, for all I've learned from it, I wouldn't have minded doing without. I would have loved to have remained blissfully ignorant.

Hope the day is smooth and quiet for all of you!

Standing Alone ~ I can't imagine being a care giver too someone, especially family with Alzheimers. I can imagine though your pain and frustration, I'm so sorry for you I really am. Mom is mentally fine like I said most days, sometimes because of her age so gets confused but that's to be expected I suppose. At least I can get some alone time, albeit feeling guilty because she's alone downstairs watching T.V., always afraid of "the look" I'm going to get. Somedays she's sweet because she realizes how she's been acting but those days a few and far between. Last she went to my husband, with me in the room of course and said she is going to start packing today and she'll be out in a month, this is the manipulation I'm talking about and I think she expected me to freak out, which I didn't. Believe me that would be heaven to me right now. I agree with you about elderly care, it's out there but so damn expensive. Mom being always vain, feels like she doesn't need to be around other old people, she's better than them lol if that makes sense, she doesn't want to accept the fact that she's almost 90 and I get that, I'm almost 60 and hate it. Like I said, I just don't like her anymore, love her yes, like her no, and I will never do this to my only child and I've already told him that. On the other side I try to understand what is going on inside her head too but this was she wanted, to be with me. She left her home and friends in Florida, came to cold Indiana (winters) has no friends, only me and John (my husband), yet I've tried to take her out with us on the few occassions when John's brother and wife invited us to go out to dinner. Instead of being grateful and happy to be out, she bitched at my brother in law for having his baseball cap on during dinner, complained about the food and told my husband off for not opening the door for her! And she wonders why we don't ask her out. I go out to get away from the stress, grocery shopping alone is like a vacation for me. She scolds our grandson because he has to LEARN, no wonder he doesn't like to be around her. She b***hes at me, no wonder I don't want to be around her! Oh well, hugs to you sweetheart, another day, when will it end. xo

Question to all you who've been through this before...MIL suddenly seems to be afraid to be in a room by herself...even though she knows every time she blows the whistle I'm right there...she keeps blowing it and when I get in there she says she doesn't know what she wants to needs...I asked her if she just liked to see me run...which she thought was pretty funny...after the 5th trip I wasn't so much...I understand her sight is getting worse all the time and I
m sure that's scary at any age but at 91 she no longer has the coping skills to deal with any of it. I don't want to take the thing away from her and have her actually need me and not be able to call...just running in circles (literally) and wondering if anyone else had dealt with this...

Red I could never deal with the whistle... Paranoia is part of dementia, she forgets where you are and feels safe when your in her line of site.. Try using a whiteboard to write where you are or bring her into where you are if you'll be awhile..

Red, can she sleep with a lamp on? Or music? of course the music may confuse her..... L never knows where her room is at night... even if she gets up to go to the bathroom.... I have to guide her back to bed... they have night lights, but she still gets confused..... when I was going thru what you are with Ruth.... it was exhausting..... no way would I have given her a whistle.. but we did have monitors... I could hear her.... and she was scared or lost.....you can only hope she gets out of this stage at some point.... Ruth did, but the next thing was she would NOT stay in bed.....
One thing I did while Ruth was being scared and lost. I got her a stuffed animal... something really soft... sometimes if I got her to hold it and talked to her a minute or two she would go back to slhugseep.... does she take anything to help her sleep???? Many people are using Melatonin to help the elders..... I see side effects that I don't like, but it does help them to sleep.... hope you get some rest soon....hugs and chocolate...

I have no idea what 'slhugseep' means...... I am soooo sleepy myself..... not adjusting to these 12 hours very well...

What AA7 said. Honestly, I don't think I could have dealt with a whistle in my mom's hands. Lord, no.

At a certain point I think all the elderly, especially alz/dementia patients, get more clingy because they're declining, they're aware of it on some level and they're afraid. I couldn't blame my mom, but that didn't make it one iota easier to deal with. It got really rough at that point. Sleep issues were popping up. Man. That was a rough patch of road for awhile... And then add a whistle into the mix? Oh please no...

LadeeM, when you finally hit that bed it's going to feel so good. Here's hoping for a good, long, restful sleep soon! And some time off! And some chocolate!

Actually, Key Lime Pie sounds even better atm... :)

Reddog .. have you considered putting in a walkie-talkie? Or would it be too confusing?

LadeeC, yeah, I was thinking of something like a baby monitor... Anything but a whistle..

Part of her fear is off and on blindness...she can't see the food on her plate most of the time even with her one good eye because the Parkinson's doesn't get the message to the brain... I don't have to worry about her wandering...she can't get up or move by herself...can't tell if she is wetting or messing in her pants...told me yesterday she had wet her depends...I could only wish that is what it was. Just walked around the corner to see her getting ready to blow that darned whistle again...told her not to and she jumped because that was when she realized I was there...she got the giggles...there she goes again...husband will get it this time...at least I have someone to take turns with when he's here. Have had to start spoon feeding her unless it's finger food...she seems to do well with a sandwich with melted cheese to hold it together...I'm just running out of ideas of what to do to try and keep her appeased...happy left the station a while back and don't think there's a return trip on that one...will try the stuffed animal...she used to collect dolls.

I feel really bad for her and for you, RD. This kind of situation is sad and frustrating at the same time. God knows you're going above and beyond. Sometimes, nothing works to appease them and it takes a lot of energy to keep trying...

And yeah, keeping another grown adult fresh and clean takes it's own physical and mental energy. Once I got my mom on a routine of activia it got interesting to say the least. Nothing else was working for her constipation and I was trying everything I could think of, to no avail. The meds from the doc weren't doing much. I finally got really desperate and worried and bought activia thinking it couldn't hurt... it didn't hurt, it helped. A lot. OMG. It was a mess. But it was a relief, too. It couldn't have been good for her to be that stopped up and it didn't seem like doc's were really looking into much, like they just brushed it off when I'd mention her complaints about constipation and that I thought the issue was getting serious... It was frustrating and scary for me not to be taken seriously. I expected tests to be done at that point, but the doc would just prescribe some other med that didn't work... Thank God the activia did. She was fine and pretty regular after that. But yeah, it was like she hadn't gone in years and now suddenly was. I was pissed at the doctors who didn't listen all over again. All residents who came and went constantly and didn't know squat about a patients background and didn't seem to care much.... Very frustrating.

But man, what a relief for me when something really helped. And yeah, keeping her clean at that point was very hard. She couldn't/wouldn't get in the shower, sponge baths weren't enough and she really couldn't stand on her own too long. For a little while with her walker and with aid from us, yeah, but not nearly long enough to get much done. Sean and I ended up with a strategy that worked pretty well, which involved the kitchen sink and sink sprayer, but Sean and I had to hold my mom's weight between us to really get her washed. There were days my back felt like it was burning and I did manage to throw my back out a couple times lifting my mom. The doc thought that I tore a muscle in my chest once after trying to lift her... Yeah, it can become very, very difficult. After a certain point, it feels like you have to do contortions to deal with them and the ever changing new issues that crop up more and more often...

I think it's just about improvising with the elderly. If one thing doesn't work, try something else. Sometimes, that's all you can do. I'd have had to come up with an alternative to a whistle..

I'm really glad your hubs steps up to help you out, RD. He should be. Thank God you can get breaks in. We all need that and must make the time or find a way to get the time for that, at all costs. Even if it means making some other arrangement the parent might not be thrilled with. Even if it's just a day or two. Ok, one day. Hell, there were times I'd have been thrilled with a few hours... Care givers that can recharge are just better all around care givers, at least I found that to be true in my case. If I could rest, I was just more patient. Zombies don't make good care takers. Walking around in a sleep deprived stupor, on auto pilot, dealing with an elderly person who's on a lot of meds, is a recipe for disaster. Towards the end, my son's had to become involved. Or somebody did. I couldn't handle my mom alone. I really needed and required, for my own well being and sanity, time away from those harsh, ugly, unyielding realities. Peace of mind and quiet time alone without constant demands and pressure shouldn't be a luxury. Nobody should ever even attempt to try and go on this journey alone... Even in the middle of a war you have to make some good somewhere, sometimes...

I'm thinking a day or two at the beach is in order. I'm waiting on some good weather. It's been raining, freezing and gloomy for the past couple days. It's not helping my mood any.

I want to get up at 4-5 a.m, go down to the beach with a hot cup of coffee, a thermos with some hot tea and listen to and watch the waves. For hours. And nothing else. Just that. Heaven. I plan to do that when this bad weather blows over. I do miss the ocean.

I like the idea of stuffed animals. We tried that. I wish it would have worked with her, to soothe her. Had my mom been happy with them, or had they worked to calm her, I would have gone out and gotten her an entire mountain of them. lol Let us know if you get good results.

Have a good one everyone...

Red, that whistle would drive me crazy. I'm just so grateful that father never even tried to use the bell I bought for him. I'm just so glad that your husband is helping out. I've read here on this site that the DIL did all the caregiving while the husband stood back and did not help at all. I don't have much experience to be able to give you advice on your mom's situation.

Tonight was my mom's memorial anniversary dinner. We had lots of food! Oh my! I filled up my paper plate halfway thru the table. They had 2 kinds of dinner rolls, BBQ shortribs, BBQ ribs, 2 kinds of fried chicken, 2 kinds of noodle pancits (regular size noodles and the skinny noodles - I took both kinds),..I lost count of the variety of food. Shrimp soup, Fish baked or cooked in the BBQ pit, etc.... I have never stuffed myself so badly as I did tonight. It was Delicious food with Flavor!!! If I had room in my stomach, I would have eaten seconds. Ohhh those fried chicken was Delicious!!! Everyone was commenting about it the most. We did have a lot of people come, too. Cousins I haven't seen for a long time. I was able to catch up with the relatives.

We, the family, would put out most of the food. But our custom is that when you attend, you bring something to the table. So, that's why we would have 2 of the same food.

My dad did NOT know about the mass this past 9 days. He did Not even know that they were having the mass for mom this morning and that the dinner for tonight. When I mentioned it to him this morning, he was surprised. But very touched that my SIL did all that for mom.

Of mom's 6 siblings here on island, only 2 came in to speak to my father. This is the same thing they did when my mom was still alive and bedridden. Most of them would sit outside and not come in to see mom. So, when my mom died, I had NO sympathy for my mom's siblings. When mom was close to death's door, I asked my siblings if we should let mom's sisters/brothers know that she's close to the end. They all said no. Since mom had her dementia 24 years ago, her siblings rarely visited. When she was bedridden, they rarely visit. When mom's baby sister told me that she regretted not coming to visit mom more often, I said nothing to comfort her.

Oldest sis is not feeling well. She looks so tired. I've decided that when I get off work early on some Wednesdays, I will not use that free time to buy things for the house. I will just come home early and let sis have an early off. It's back to like me and dad caregiving mom. then dad had a stroke. Now it's me and sis caregiving dad, and one of us might have the stroke. Since I have my job to get away from dad, oldest sis doesn't even have that option. So, I've decided to relieve her so that she can rest. Plus I'm really really worried that if she has a stroke, then I'm back to caregiving for 2 people!

I just want to share that I'm on my third good day!! For reasons only the dementia gods know, my Mom's been (lack of a better word) "with it".. No morning panic attacks, no shadowing or paranoia.. It's like a vacation..

If only it would last forever!!!

By the way, since my husband will only watch CNN all day long, if anyone has any questions about the missing Malaysian flight 370, just ask!!

Newbie with first post. This looks like the place for me. I've been caring for my mother-in-law (dememtia) and my wife (cancer, but not terminal) for about a year and a half. My wife doesn't require much care but she's absolutly no help with her mom. In fact, sometimes she makes things more difficult. Mom is in early stages of vascular dementia; she's at the stage where she constantly asks the same questions and worries about everything. I have not read all previous 17839 posts but I've read enough to realize I've got it much better than many. Hats off to you folks who soldier on in very difficult circumstances.

I'm lucky in that I love my Mother-in-Law. She's only 6 years older than me and we get along great. When we go out together folks assume we're married and we sort of act like it because we're so close. My wife rarely goes with us as her chemo treatments have robbed her of energy. Nothing in my past suggest I'd be any good as a caregiver, but I've surprised myself. I don't know why, or how I do it but I'm really good at "taking" her never ending questions. Telling her it's Monday for the 35th time doesn't rile me like it does my wife. LOL Even after a year and a half of this I can still "take it" and smile.

I retired early to take care of her. My retirement was ment to be spent riding my motorcycle around the country, attending off-road events and sailing around the Gulf. It hasn't worked out that way! We are "joined at the hip" and I rarely get a chance to ride any longer than to breakfast with a few friends on sunday. I'm not bitter but I do miss riding and sailing. Haven't sold bikes or boat yet ...........

What I'm starting to feel is "caregivers fatigue" and I don't know what to do about it. I'm also worried about my own health. I'm very lucky to be very healthy for a 71yo and I'm the type of person who enjoy's stress but, I know I ain't seen nothing yet. I know down the road this job will get a lot ahhhhh "dirtier;" I have no fear about what's going to happen; I just hope I can handle it as well as many of you. Also, when her fear turns to anger, and it's directed at me ..... I have a hard time with that. I know she's got a brain problem yet I let her push my buttons and I end up allowing myself to get angry too; doesn't help at all.

Dirtboy welcome, you won't be a newbie for long.
First thing you will learn is to take care of yourself. While MIL is still in fairly good health make time to ride your bike and go sailing. Even if you have to hire a caregiver for a day or two try and make the time. Also try and make alone time with your wife. She may not be much fun at the moment but she has been through a lot and needs to be cherished and seeing you haveing fun with her mother must raise some questions in her mind.
Have you made sure that all the paperwork and legalities are in order for all three of you. have you consulted an elder care lawyer,done the wills and gotten POA sorted out both medical and financial. no good waiting till one of you gets too ill to make decisions. Are there other family members who can step in to help from time to time. Just a few thoughts from someone your MILs age. Blessings.

dirtboy, welcome.... you sound as 'seasoned' as the rest of us, you just didn't know we were here !!!! sure wish I could handle the same questions with such grace.... like all the suggesetions Veronica made, especially the one about getting someone in there to help..... it's a grand calling, this caregiving thing, but take it from all the 'way past tired ones' that getting some outside help is paramount to you not cracking in half from all the stress.... and yes, wife needs some attention too.... you must feel so stretched between the two.....

come back and join us.... you will make some great friends here, we even laugh once in awhile... and hey, you don't want to miss that now do ya???

Hope we see you soon.... sending hugs, prayers, angels, and I usually send 'chocolate' but in your case will send a 'six pack'.... !!!!!! will be great to have a man's perspective.... hugs..

Welcome Dirtboy!! Look forward to sharing and learning with you.. Take time for yourself..

MIL keeps calling me to get her up...would not be such a problem but she's sitting at the kitchen table and has been out of bed for hours...I have prayed for patience and she's giving me lots of opportunity to practice it so I guess I shouldn't complain...another day...

So many people on this site so totally understand and empathize with your de lima... I wish I had the answers for you as well as myself.

Sorry, I meant this to be directed to dirtboy...wish there was some way to edit comments:

Photoartc
0 mins ago
So many people on this site so totally understand and empathize with your de lima... I wish I had the answers for you as well as myself.

Tell me I handled this correctly..

My Mom wanted me to sit with her and watch TV "because she was lonely" .. I just got up to do some chores... I told her that I can't sit there all day. I also informed her that I have made suggestions for company as in the Senior Ctr or bringing in Home Care but she refuses..

I guess my point is should I have reminded her of her refusal to do other activities? I feel bad but not that bad...

A&A-
So many of us would like to give them options, hoping that they will pick the one that is good for everybody. My mom lost her choice two years ago when I started taking her to a day program. She never would have understood that it is very good for her to have this activity and in turn good for me to get a few hours of the day without her. She can rely on other people for a little bit which is a tremendous boost for me. I know there are others that I can count on that I do not have to do this all myself, nor would my mom have ever wanted me to do this without help. She was usually a fair woman and would never have wanted the care of her to fall to just one of her children but, that is what has happened in this family.

A&A, you need to take care of yourself. Do not give your mom an option of having others help you with her. Give her the option of either a facility or you and the team you choose to hire.

I have been bumped FOUR F**KING TIMES !!!!!!! I am ready to storm the bastille of Aging Care;.... later,,,,,,, after I've had some sleep.....you did good Assa, more later when I am not ready to kill someone.... hugs to everyone that isn't admin for AC.....

Welcome Photo...... will talk to you more this weekend.... only tiny little posts for now....come back and let us get to know you... hugs