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Thank you ladeeM...I look forward to it
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Dirtboy, you are indeed in a great place. :) Glad you found this site. People deal with a lot in the care giver role. It's nice to have a place to go filled with so many people that know what's up and get it and can give great advice. If I hadn't run into so many good people here, going through a lot of what I was and totally understood some crazy emotions, I really would be in the loony bin. And you're right to worry about your own health in the care giver role. Everybody should. Care giver stress is the scary kind, but at least here you aren't alone in the trenches.
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Supper is on and wine is poured! Today mom what me to call Firestone for her Scooter and give them 4000.00 and they will come out and fix it. lol
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A&A I completely sympathise. But I think you're only asking because you already know: what you said to her about (basically) "if you're lonely whose fault is that?" wasn't wrong, but it was kind of pointless. I'm really not criticising, I'm afraid this is something I do all the time and dislike myself for - as in

"Call me if you need anything."
"Oh yes, thank you, I will."
"Yes, you won't."

I am correct. She won't. But that's not the point.
You are correct. She's lonely because she won't allow you to arrange t.v. dates with people who have got time to sit and watch telly with her all day. But that's not the point.

I can't stop myself doing it, either. Guess we're just letting off a little harmless steam? Nod and smile, nod and smile would be better - but a girl's only got so much sweetie-pie about her, I find. Sigh.
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Should say mom wants. This week she just wants money. lol me too!
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CM, 'A girl's only got so much sweetie pie about her'... Love it..lol...so true
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$4000 to fix the scooter? Wow! Prices like that, associated with the elderly and prices for just about everything in this world in general, continue to amaze and scare me...
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I think a new scooter costs less than that - probably 2 or 3 of them. That is unless Rolls Royce makes scooters!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Hi everyone. I just stopped by to say hello! I'm finally starting to feel better. I still miss mother like crazy... but each day is a little bit easier. Sometimes, when I least expect it... I'll start missing her and crying.

For the most part life is starting to become a little more normal. I'm still quite lost though. When you spend that much time focused on one person, and that person is no longer here... you kind of lose who you are. That's where I am.

I'm trying to do things that make me happy... but I'm still not sure what I want to do with the rest of my life. :) I'm sure I'll figure it out sooner or later.

Dirtboy... enjoy the good times while you can... don't feel too guilty about getting angry... anger is a natural reaction... it is often how we deal with the stress of the situation.

Book... I'm glad the memorial anniversary went well...

I'm sorry I'm not on very often any more. I miss every one of you. Trying to build my Tupperware business has taken more time than I thought it would. I'm also trying to learn how to use the new quilting machine. (I can't remember if I told you guys about it or not)... Mother even approved the purchase... that was important to me, as it was her life insurance that paid for it... :) While I was looking at it, I heard her voice, plain as day, telling me this was the right machine! So... I bought it!

Have a GREAT day everyone!
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LM, it's good to see you back here! I am where you are...exactly where you are. I feel you. Its a very odd feeling, feeling so adrift. I'm trying to do things that make me happy, too. I've rediscovered baking, something I used to love to do all the time. My apple bread the other day was a dried up disaster, but my cheesecake yesterday was a winner!

I've also gotten back into my houseplants. Not too many, mostly edible herbs. And my little lemon tree has a tiny lemon on it! I did plant some catnip in a container and the cats are going nuts over it, pushing their noses into it constantly, chewing on it...if it was on the ground they'd probably be rolling around in it. It's hilarious! I hope the little guy survives to get bigger through all this attention. lol

But yeah...the rest of my life. That seems to be a problem atm. :/

I'm glad you got the quilting machine...with that kind of advice, you know you made the right purchase! Love it! I hope you have a lot of fun with that. My mom used to make quilts by hand. I've got 3-4 beautiful ones that she made. I never had the patience for it though...

Book, yeah, that feast sounded good! Made me want to do some fried chicken... I'm glad your brother's visit is going well, too...
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Let's just say my choices of yesterday have come back and bit me in the a**!
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Photoartc, oh my! I think that your hubby and I would get along fine! Most of the channels I watch is CNN, HLN and Good Morning America, HGTV. If I remember, I also watch Real Life ER, Long Island Medium and Undercover Boss. With regards to MH370, I can’t believe all the different information put out by the Malaysian gov’t. The rate they’re going, no one will believe anything they say. I think one of 2 scenarios: the pilot hijacked the plane, landed it, and now we have 200-some hostages to be released if $$ is paid…. Or… the plane has crashed into the ocean.

Hi Dirtboy, welcome to AC.

Red, if MIL no longer knows that she’s already up, maybe she will no longer remember to blow that whistle.

Assandy, I agree with Glad. I used to give dad a yes or no option when I really wanted him to say yes. Once he says no, it’s a no. I learned from watching Teepa Snow and others here on AC, to don’t give them that option. Stick to one or 2 options. Most times, dad would choose option 3 – which I did Not present. – So, what happened???

Hi Laura. Glad that your Tupperware business is still going strong.
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Since father is becoming more forgetful, he’s also forgetting to take his 6-8 herbal pills per meal. His rashes are going away. His skin is back to normal. Now, I’m fighting his bedsores. The new one that was bleeding, is coming back. He has a new Big “pimple” bedsore (looks like a giant pimple about to pop) right on his rear. And 2 more that I can see is growing a lump. These are strange bedsores. The bedsores I’m used to, the skin gets abrasion, then it tears, and the skin layers start breaking down, until he has a hole. These new bedsores are like … pimples, or a big insect bite. He’s got that “insect-like bite” on his upper right thigh where the catheter’s stretch band was covering it. Tonight, I saw that his lower left belly has a bulge. I pressed it and asked if it hurt. He said no. The last time he had this, it was painful to the touch. And then he bled real bloody red urine with the stringy tissues coming out. I guess this means he’s going to go through that again.

A little funny story…. as I mentioned before, when it’s time to change his shirt, when I tell him to bend his arm, he straightens it. Well, he’s still doing that. A few days ago, when I tried to fix the pillow behind his back, I told him to sit up. He tried to sit up by pulling with his right hand on the railing. While he was trying to pull himself up, Both of his legs flew up in the air. So, when he pulled himself up, his legs were still up. Because he’s no longer using his legs to anchor him, he fell back on his back, with his legs still up in the air. I told him that he needs to sit up. So he used his arm to pull him up, with his legs still dangling up in the air, he gets himself in seating position…but because his legs are still dangling up, he slams right back down to me. I started giggling so hard. He tried to get himself back up and I had to tell him to stop and to put his feet back down on the bed. Once I was done laughing, I told him to keep his feet down on the bed when he’s going to sit up. Yep, that finally did the trick.
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Book, those sound like boils to me. They're very painful. I've heard holding a warm cloth over them to relieve the pressure works, but sometimes they have to be seen by, and lanced by, a doctor if they're big enough. Otherwise, they keep coming back if you don't get that core out. I don't know, though. I'm not sure if they are boils, they just sound like it. I'm sorry that your dad is starting the bleeding again, Book. I'd put this all in the doctor's lap.

Sometimes, yes, I would tell my mom to bend her arm and she'd straighten it instead, or visa versa. I would ask her to lean over one way and she'd lean over the other. Sometimes you just have to have a good laugh or go nuts. At least we still can laugh, thank God.. :)
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SA, at first, I thought it was bedsores. Then insect bite. Then back to bedsores. So, I decided to post it here in case someone knows what it is - other than bedsore. I didn't even think of boils. I think it's associated to him sweating and the skin is in enclosed area (pampers, pants, and then blanket) 24/7. I'm still trying to get him used to the idea of using the hospital gown. I'm going to check some websites that others here on AC recommended - to see if something will fit father's needs to wear pants while bedridden and in a catheter. Thanks, SA.
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Book,
I agree with SA, it sounds like boils. I have had them myself, they are very painful. Once you use the warm cloth, as warm as he can stand, you may be able to drain it yourself. But be careful, stand back, because when it is opened, the pressure release is something like a fire hydrant being opened. Did this for my ex once, OMG! Gross, stinks, stuff launched in the air and ended up in my hair.:-O
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Yeah, my mom didn't get boils, but I got one years ago, on the back of my neck. I thought I had gotten bitten by a spider or something. It went away on it's own eventually, I didn't really do much for it, but yeah, from what I read they thrive in warm, moist body parts.

I think it would be a great idea for your dad to wear a hospital type gown, or at least clothes several sizes too big. The last couple years with my mom I just found that if I bought her clothes a size or two too large, it really was a big help as far as keeping her skin clean and dry went. And larger clothing was just easier to get on and off at that point, too. My mom liked to cover up with a blanket, too, even though the house was plenty warm. With clothes a couple sizes too big she didn't sweat as much and air could circulate much better, even under the blanket. I'd at least think about getting your dad a few BIG oversize shirts if he doesn't have any at the moment. It might help and might be something he'd be willing to wear without too much hassle if he doesn't go for the hospital gown...which are a godsend. But still, my mom didn't like them and didn't want to wear them. Whatever works, right? lol
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Glad...I needed that laugh... Oh, lord... XD
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About the only thing MIL has been able to do on her own for some time was to get her food from plate to mouth...we've now digressed to sometimes getting a piece of food to mouth if I stab it with her fork...this morning she was shaking so bad she couldn't get her pills in her mouth and I had to put them in and then hold her cup for her and finally having her drink her Ensure through a straw...she is having trouble with a travel mug...going to get her a sippy cup today...I can grind the pills up and mix with her drink but not sure what to do about the caps...any suggestions???
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Book...my MIL insists on wearing pajama bottoms...a nurse friend of mine told me to split the back of them so I can pull them up and down to cover her legs without having to get them under her backside. She hates them because they are not regular ones but I told her it's to save my back or she won't get to wear them at all... I split the from the back waist band to the crotch...the kind with some stretch and give to the fabric are better and they don't fray like regular woven fabric. they can also wear them sitting in a wheelchair (just put a blanket in the chair to cover the backside)..don't know if will help with your dad or not...good luck
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Red: have you tried putting the capsule in her favorite pudding or cottage cheese, yogurt, ice cream? It might work depending on how her swallowing is in general. Don't open the capsule tho'. Maybe she could get along without that particular med? Getting our loved one to take meds when the swallowing is difficult can be so challenging. I used a pill crusher with a little water, a plastic medicine syringe, then gave my husband ice cream for a "chaser" as my daughter put it. It worked because he never refused ice cream, bless his soul. You'll get really creative; bless you for taking such good care of her. xxxooo
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Reddog, yeah, what BK said. Putting pills into some pudding or yogurt was a go with my mom. She didn't even realize she was taking them, I got a job done with minimal hassles and she got to enjoy a healthy snack. I like the 'ice cream chaser' idea, too. Whatever works!
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She loves ice cream so that may be the answer if she'll swallow it without sucking on it till it dissolves in her mouth...thanks...
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Book it does sound as though your dad has boils and applying a very hot washcloth several times a day will help bring it to a head. he may need an antibiotic too so check with his Dr
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Red before you grind up pills check with the pharmacist to see if any of them are long acting. You can also pull the capsules apart and sprinkle the contents. Mix everything with a small amount of something tasty then follow with a treat. Some meds are very bitter so best not to mix with a whole pudding. Down the road if worse comes to worse mix with some liquid and use a syring without a needle and squirt slowly into her mouth. a 5 or 10 ml syringe shoud do.
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Thanks for the hints...spoke with MIL doctor today and he is putting in an order for Hospice care...we've put this off for a long time but want the care team in place so that it won't be a huge change for MIL when it gets to the point that there is no choice. Today she's had an Ensure for breakfast...actually drank the whole thing which is not the norm now...half of one for lunch w 3 small shrimp...half of one with dinner and 3 bites of a pot pie has been refusing her ice cream which is almost unheard of...she's getting weaker by the day...now takes both of us to get her transferred from bed to wheelchair...she's afraid to sit in her recliner because we had so much trouble getting her out of it. Transferring her wears her out for several hours. She keeps saying it feels like there is something in her throat because she keeps getting choked which is the Parkinson's...anyway Hospice is supposed to evaluate her by the beginning of next week...she can't tell if she's in bed or in her chair...thinks there is something wrong with her T.V. every time a commercial comes on...wants me to come fix it. This could go on for quite a while or it could end quickly...we understand that and have tried to mentally prepare ourlselves
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Red: I'm so glad you've contacted Hospice. They will help you with meds, will come when you call or at best they will return your call if you don't get a nurse right away. Caution on the meds in capsule form - some of them are not to be taken apart and sprinkled - check with the pharmacist before you do anything and also the crushed ones too. Water is the best for the syringe, as juices or milk can interact with some meds and they become toxic or ineffective, depending on what you're diluting with - not always, but be sure about that.
The swallowing and refusing ice cream are signs of the beginning of the shut down. Her breathing will also change; I will be praying for you all, as I've gone through this and it can be a long time, or as in our case, a little over 3 months. I encourage you to lean on the Hospice team, as they will help you keep her comfortable to the end. Blessings and ooo's and xxx's.
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Butterflykisses...her breathing has already changed...even though she's on oxygen 24/7 she sounds like she's gasping for air but says she doesn't feel short of breath...and her oxygen level will be sometimes 96 other times will test in the mid 80's she's been exhibiting signs for a while now. I held my mother and brother and a couple of friends and an aunt as they drew their last breath so I know what's coming and can't say that knowing makes it any easier. Once that rattle sets in and all you can do is wait it out it's a pretty helpless feeling. With all I've witnessed I'm not sure how my husband has managed to not be there...he was in Viet Nam but that is different than a family member. Tonight she was able to swallow her pills fine but only wanted 3 bites of a pot pie (used to be her favorite) and half of an Ensure no ice cream. I know what's coming...just don't want it.
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Reddog, I am thinking of you. What a hard time for you, dreading my turn, I just hope one sister that wants nothing to do with my mom will find a way to heal the deep seated resentments of 40 years ago and be able to forgive, love and be there for our mom.
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Reddog... my heart goes out to you. Having gone through this just a few months ago, I can wholeheartedly agree with you that knowing what is coming doesn't make it any easier. Hospice can be a Godsend!

Book... sure sounds like boils to me. I've missed you greatly my friend. It sounds as if your father isn't fighting you as much as he was before. For that I am thankful. You are a good daughter.

Have a GREAT evening!
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