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Red- I am soo glad that you are getting back to abnormal lol. Sounds like it will be like a new house. I am so happy for you. Take care of YOU!!!!!
Tex - I understand about the doctor visit. I am sorry you have to go so far. My mom loved walmart. Even though she was in a electric cart she wanted to go down every isle. She would ask what is this and what is that. This was always after work. It would take a couple of hours. It was always hard to find a cart too. Oh well, she did not get out a lot so this was her social time. She always was grateful that we went shopping. Take care of YOU!!!!
Pam - So sorry about the wreck. I hope it all turns out well. So glad that your mom is in such good health. Take care of YOU!!!!!
LadeeM - I am sorry your disappointed. It will get better. I agree with you about not work for the other girl. It would set a precedent. She will want you to do it more. At least she is a good caregiver. You care so much that your lady does not have her schedule changed. You are a winder. Take care of YOU!!!
H there - We had a open house on Sunday and apparently someone liked it so much they wanted to see again this afternoon. I am trying not to get my hopes up. The house has been listed in one of the for sale magazines. On line you can click on the house and get a video showing it. This is so great!! I guess it is the time of year. Job hunt is going well. I am working with a employment specialist for the state who is helping me. I will meet with her again tomorrow. I hope to get one soon. Money is really getting low. I do not know how I will pay the bills. So good news and bad. A friend and I went out to lunch and had a good time. You all take care okay.
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Hi everyone there are days like today when I just dread the thought of going over to my Mom's and caregiving only because I am worn out and siblings don"even care about her or myself it is so so sad what to do?
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Overwhelm, how did your day turn out? Sometimes it's really hard just to drag yourself off your seat, I know - I was sitting at the kitchen table earlier on, and it was just like the old-fashioned wall poster put it: "sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits."

Like you, I was mulling siblings and the unanswerable question of WHY they're like they are. Thinking I should write to brother before it's too late, the time will have gone, and I'll never have tried to change things. But on the other hand…

Goodness, isn't it discouraging??! Well. Getting it off your chest helps a bit. Hope you have a better day today.
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Overwhelm I hear ya! It stinks with no help.. But we know this is who we are and doing what makes us feel good about ourselves. I know I will have no regrets regarding my care for my Mom..
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It is official...we slept in our room last night...finally all moved back into the house...now to get ready for a garage sale...that may take a while...still getting some doctor bills for MIL...Social Security and her pension got stopped. There are probably a couple more doctor bills pending so won't close her account out till they are all in. Our son should be back in the country at the end of May so we will get together as a family and have a celebration of her life. We were so tired we slept like rocks in the new bed last night...almost back to normal.
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You deserve it Red after the great care you gave MIL at the end of her life. It is never easy but you did it with grace, compassion and humor
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Fantastic Red, nothing like sleeping in our own bed in our own bedroom..... and I second what Veronica said... wish I could be as calm as you are....

Last night..... then sleep, glorious sleep.... love ya'll... later, when I have a rested brain cell....
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It's been months since I've been on our group. It's great to still recognize some names. :-). For those of you who weren't on when this group was my greatest support, my mom lived with me for about 18 years (the last few year she had significant dementia which made it very hard) and I put her in a home about 1 1/2 years ago. She's in a small facility in a home in a residential neighborhood which is licensed for about 10 residents and has 3 caregivers/24-7. It's been a good place for her- not fancy, but excellent personal care. I visit her, usually once a week, and she's usually fairly content. Well, not today! She fussed the whole time. "I want to go home". So I asked her what she wanted to do. "I would go lie in my bed". Well, you can do that! Your bed is just down the hall. "And the bathroom is too far away." She reminded me of her mother who lived in Baltimore. Every time someone visited, she grumped that no one visited. And eventually, no one did... :-(. Anyway, it was a tough visit. Luckily, one of my daughters was with me. We both tried to empathize and redirect but nothing seemed to help... Hopefully the next visit will be better... :-)
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I'm really, really tired. These last two weeks have been hard ones. I spent my Birthday at the Hospital with my Dad. He had four siezures that day. He spent for days in the Hosp. I thought I would loose him that day. He's on Dilantin three times a day. I can't move him anymore from his bed. He doesn't have the strengh to do it since then. He eats with dificulty. I miss our time together ever though we are in the same place.
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Sounds like a tough time. I'm sorry... My mom's dementia makes it where even when I'm with her, it's not like I'm with her....just feels like I'm with someone who looks like my mom... So I can really relate....
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I am tired.... Praying situation will improve re: homelife w/Mom. I have a job interview that will put me in a city closer to some friends that will help me w/Mom. Hoping to get the job so we can move out of this city.
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rioblu, focus on being well and starting a new career. Mom may want to stay in her home, so let her do that and let others see to her care while you heal.
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Red zzzzzzzzzzzzz.....
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I was at the store with Mom she wanted slippers. (She doesn't need anymore but whatever) She wanted to try them on, it was Walmart so they are all packaged up. I told her she'll have to take them home to try on and return if needed.. (I knew they would fit she already has the same ones) Well NO she HAD to try them on.. Luckily the women working there heard our conversation and offered to pull them apart and let her try them on.. Well Mom keeps going on that Winter is coming! Telling the women about why she needs new slippers, blah, blah, blah..

The women looks up at me and says "I understand my FIL is 95"!
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Anybody is looking for ways to improve the bowel frequency, and chronic diarrhea? We used to have to deal with four explosions daily. A couple of months ago the doctor recommended adding a probiotic to mom's daily regimen of pills and playing with the diet. We did a week of gluten free, then completely dairy free, no change, until we added a probiotic. I got a Walgreens brand that came in a box of blister packaging, green and white box. This is a capsule so if you need to sprinkle on food that would work as well.

VOILA! The frequency much reduced and at times somewhat normal. We also eliminated real butter, don't know if that has anything to do with it, but I'm not even going to try it. She is back on a normal diet.
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Glad, I'm glad {snicker, not intentionally playing with the word} that you Finally found the answer to your mom's problem. I recall you inquiring about it. Probiotic. I bought a bottle but never got around to using it. Thanks!
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I did three major rants and deleted them all.... realizing it's the same old crap.... I apparently have some really crappy Karma when it comes to families..... in order to stay professional.... I did not grab the daughter by the face and say... SHUT UP... just SHUT UP for a minute..... I am soooo proud of me.
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LadeeM I know what you mean about deleting the same ole rants..I figure I have to "put up or shut up". Only I can change my situation!

I hope things improve, you need to take care of yourself..
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Book, play with my name? Yup, I sometimes read the word in other posts then realize oh, they are the happy kind of glad.

Get going on that probiotic, what a difference in my mom! Incredible!
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Father takes his herbal supplement pills 4 x day. I noticed that when he takes it, he breaks out bad in hives. So I hid the opened bottle and dispense 3 a day. One in the morning, 2 in the evening. This stopped the hives and it went away. We are constantly fighting over this. Father would get so angry, that he would try to hit/kick me when I go near him. But I was firm.

Now, sis keeps commenting how forgetful he is. And every time I come home from work, he would ask for his 2 pills - but it's no longer in the dispenser. So I always verify with sis if she gave it to him for dinner. She said yes. So she KNOWS how forgetful he is.

Then one night, I saw him pick up a bottle by his table, opened it, and took pills out. I was shocked and then angry when I saw it was the prostate bottle. Sis gave him the whole bottle! Now he's taking it whenever he thinks it's night time (after he wakes from a short nap.) I took the bottle away and hid in the bedroom. I knew that sis would just go to the cabinet, open a New bottle and give it to him. So, I confiscated all 4 unopened bottles and hid those, too. Terrible arguments from that night on because he wanted that bottle. He was also so mad when sis told him that I also took the bottles in the cabine. He demanded for it. I said no. I will give it to him daily.

So every day, I put aside 2 for dinner. For the past 3 or 4 days, I noticed that the pills remained in the dispenser pill box. I just figured sis did not give it to him for dinner and he 'forgot' to take it.

Tonight, as I was changing his pampers and his shirt, he was scratching himself like crazy. I looked at his back. From this morning to tonight, he has broken out in very bad rashes/hives! I KNEW that he was overusing pills again. I turned to his table by his bed. There! On the table, was a prostate pill bottle! I am just so angry and Disgusted with sis. I can't believe it. I'm tired of all this b.s. I try not to interfere. But if I don't, these pills can damage his insides and then I will have more work to do. Not sis. Me.

She can be eating dinner right here in the livingroom. When I walk in from work at 7pm, father would immediately ask me what's for dinner. Me! So, now I have to find soft food for him, and meat/rice for me. Sis finishes her meal. Does she offer to get him dinner so that I can get mine? No. Instead, she said to just give him banana cake! {{imaginary thunking of my head against the wall}}. I gave him the microwavable Lean Cuisine noodle. He ate all the food from his plate. I don't know anymore. Yep, I did confiscate that other prostate pill bottle. I can't wait until tomorrow when father notices it's missing from his table. Not!!!!
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Book ugh! Same crap different day! This battles seems to never end.
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He tells her to jump, she doesn't even ask how high. She just jumps.

I just hate to hide the pills in the bedroom. The only room in the house with air con is the livingroom, where father is with the hospital bed. My room is so hot, it's stuffy. I don't even stay in it too long because I start sweating immediately - even with the fan on. When I touch the prostate bottle, it's hot. And the pills are not suppose to be in a hot room. So, I keep putting it back in the air con room, then sis does this, and then I'm forced to hide it again. Yeah, same crap - different day. It's like the mice chasing it's tail. Or was that the dog chasing it's tail?
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As I type I'm ignoring the jabber about how "someone keeps moving my stuff when I'm not here"..

I wonder how that happens when you never leave your house without me!!!
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My dad accuses us of taking/stealing his stuff by saying, "SOMEBODY is taking my so-and-so. They better return it. Stupid, taking from a sick person." etc....
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Feeling deeply demoralised. Mother had a cataract removed from her left eye a week ago; so what with wanting to get her using that eye, and the general presumption that mental stimulation is good for her, and that her fine motor skills could do with a bit of a work out, I've been searching high and low for a jigsaw puzzle. Very picky about specifications. It had to be interesting but not difficult. Colourful but not garish. Large pieces but not for babies. Anyway… thought I'd found the perfect one: 100 pieces, a range of sizes, and the picture is a map of the British Isles - I thought it would make it easier for her, because she should know the rough layout anyhow.

Only she doesn't. She's forgotten it. So that was a bit depressing. Daughter and I sat and encouraged her without actually cheating, and eventually she got the corners and edges sorted out. Then it ground to a halt. And she can't remember anywhere she's lived. Or where we born. Or when. Or when she was born. And I'm not sure if she REALLY can't remember or if I've just inadvertently depressed her and put her into a negative tailspin.

Oh well. Might as well go and finish it myself. At least it'll keep me out of mischief for five minutes, me and my bright ideas… :(
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Countrymouse please don't get to down or be to hard on yourself you try to help her with the puzzle is wonderful seriously your a good daughter and loving person please think that you absolutely didn't inadvertently depressed her. Sending lots of love.
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Countrymouse... it had nothing to do with you.... you did great and picked the perfect puzzle.... maybe it was meant for YOU to begin with.... she will be alright... enjoy the puzzle...!!!

My test results came back.... I am perfect.... all my numbers are as they should be..... my bad cholesterol is only one point above what it should be.... so not to bad for a fat woman who loves chocolate, but lets stress do her in..... hmmmmm.
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The puzzle is for age 4 upwards, I honestly thought she'd find it easy. Thank you, both - I suppose we've all got to take mistakes in our stride, haven't we?

Book, would there be any mileage in telling every pharmacist and health food store you know your father goes to that he is allergic to these products and if they sell to him they are risking his health? You've got to cut off supply without its being your fault, somehow. Goodness it must be frustrating.

Just supper to get out of the way (and bath, and t.v., and late snacks, and eye drops, and meds, and the rest… but you know what I mean) and today will be done. "Come what come may, time and the hour run through the roughest day." I wouldn't mind but it started so well.
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CM, I like puzzles but I do not have the patience to do 100 pieces. I bought for my my nieces when they were around 4 those big cut puzzles of 10 pieces and each one was a nursery rhyme theme. All were colorful. Lady who lived in the shoe and the kids all over the shoes. Little miss muffett and a spider dangling above.... Why don't you try those first and then work your way up to difficult? Because those puzzles can get so expensive, I also found some great pictures, glued it to cardboard formerly a box, then cut out the shapes. Hough, maybe that was where the nursery rhyme puzzles came from. Children's books are just soooo expensive. I may have ended up making it. It's proudly hanging in my bedroom wall.

It's morning, time to get up. He is pissed off. He just discovered the pill bottle missing.
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CM, I just came from my room. The puzzles are store bought and I counted 60 pieces.
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