This seems to be a question that is not asked enough or we think what we are feeling is not as important as what our loved one is going through. This job we have taken on is a tough one and there are days when I think my "stress rope" cannot be pulled any tighter. Then there are other times that make those bad days just a memory. Do you feel like banging your head against a wall one day? And then the next day your loved one is attentive and loving and comprehends whatever you say? There are some who keep those feelings bottled up within themselves; others take the time for outside resources and others who look at sites such as this for some understanding. I do better when I have someone else to bounce my feelings off of. Let's face it....we aren't superhuman and besides ourselves and perhaps a family to take care of we now have taken on the responsibility of another human who is incapable of taking care of themselves. Do you breeze through the care giving without a problem? If so, I would like to know how you do it, maybe you can offer some new ideas; do you have feelings of frustration and need to talk about those? Come and talk and know that you can speak freely and without judgement and without finger pointing.
I am caring for my mother-in-law and have been for about 1 1/2 years. She has moderate dementia and incontinence. Other than that she is very healthy. Sometimes that short amount of time feels like 10 years and I wonder how long I will be able to do this job. I get so very tired of hearing the same thing day in and day out, but I have to remind myself that to her, each time she sees me, she is offering new information. At times I have no problems communicating with her, but it seems like more and more she cannot retain a thought longer than 5 minutes. We have had to make signs for her so she will know what she can and cannot do. So far it's working, but for how long? Maybe I will have to end up making her a "Book of Do Nots". She is on memory drugs, which don't seem to make a difference. So why do I continue to dole them out to her? I guess I'm afraid of what might happen or how she might act without them. I might have to rent a boat or buy a helmet! Sometimes I see something in her that leads me to believe that she could get aggressive and what would be my reaction to that? At the end of each and every day, after she is tucked into bed, I breathe such a sigh of relief. The "inner beast" is quiet at last, or at least for a few hours.
Pull up a chair and visit........I would like to know how you are coping everyday..be it good or with handfuls of stress.
It's been an exhausting week for me so i am sorry for not being in touch. I just finished a blog post on what we went through to get mom into rehab after a fall. It took a lot of juggling but she is finally settled and i can breath a bit today. I hope now that she is settled that i can go ahead and have my surgery, but we'll have to see how long she will be there. Posted all the details of our ordeal palcaregivers. Hope everyone takes a few moments before the day is done to remember those who have gone before us. Take care my friends. Ruth Anne
I looked at the video. Then I told my niece that they were afraid of their shadow but I made it into a game. I got up, and the ceiling light showed my shadow on the floor. I then said, "Don't you remember me doing this to your shadow and my shadow?" I then jumped on my shadow, and said, "Aha! I got you!" Then I continued stomping on my shadow. I then stopped and looked at her and asked her if she remembered us stomping on each other's shadows. And she remembered laughed and said, "Oh yeah! I remember that!"
Sis has been mentioning several times about finding replacements of her daughters on Saturdays with babysitting dad. Today, fave niece's husband's friend's girlfriend wants the position. They are trying to save money for a new home. She works for the gov't caregiver. I hesitated. I have explained to them that the last time I hired someone from the govt caregiver, dad complained about her to all her coworkers. He even said that she was trying to kill him. I was so stressed out that her work might fire her. Now, we have another one. I explained to niece that she must explain to hubby to tell the bf his gf of what happened to the first cg. We will see.... Oh, fave niece has a college class conflict on Saturdays. And her sister is pregnant and soon won't be able to babysit. And well, my sister doesn't want to babysit dad.
Thank you Ladee for letting us know
Thinking of Veronica and wishing you a speedy recovery. Check in when you can.
Praying Veronica heals more and more each day and feels back to her old self so soon.
"International addresses are not allowed when there are digital item(s) in your cart."
Hello?!!! This is an EBOOK not a d*rn kindle, nook or some other electronic devices! Now I will have to call the 1800 number and see if I can Reason with them. {eyes rolling}
Glad, the book is in Amazon. Paul Cleave: Trust No One - A thriller. Hardcover Prime member $16.22, used $12.09, kindle $7.99.
I haven't checked my email to see if BN responded back to my email.
I slept early lastnight. I was so exhausted by 11pm. Slept deeply (I think) the whole night. Except, I woke up more tired than when i went to sleep. I'm thinking I may have sleep disruptions throughout the night because I rarely wake up refreshed. I know that there's the depression but ... even though I sleep with a wedge pillow and another head pillow on top of that, I still wake up in the middle of the night choking. Anyway, 10:20pm and I'm soooo tired. I think I will be going to be early tonight, too.
Thanks, Ladee for encouraging Veronica to post. It's a good positive action. I would not have thought of it.
Yes, it was so good to hear from Ms. V.... I really don't think she knew how loved and respected she is.... so that should lighten her spirits some.....
Will be handing in my notice at my present job very soon... don't feel like getting into it tonight, but today just made the decsion for me.... funny how things work out sometimes.....
Hugs to all of you, angels for those that need them, love to all of you, and chocolate ..... just lots and lots of chocolate.