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Tuvalu islands...?
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Going to change my avatar back to Baccarat Crystal vase, any minute now.
Love the islands.
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I dont remember seeing this post but today my adult son told me all I do in complain about caregiving, ripped my heart out. He complains about his ob, so why cant I ? sure doesnt mean I dont love my Mom because I do but dont we all look forward to life after caregiving? Argh horrible day.Guess I need to shut up and change my habit too!
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Well I am supposed to go on an overnight girls trip tomorrow with my daugher and my best friend who is going through some rough stuff medically. BF found this place, it's a 3 hour drive ( which I will share with daughter) I took off today as I fried my back at work last week, and kept on working 3 more days! But I looked at the workload today, and who I would be working with.. and just said Heck NO way!! I have fmla for my back.. never use it.. but I did today! Mom and I watched Poldark on the DVD, and I took it very easy. So wish me luck! If the drive dosen't kill me the place looks like alot of fun. Peddlars Village near Philly in Pa.
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Whew !!!! All went well, at least with H. I knew he would understand, not so much with J.... we had to explain to her 15 times it was because of my health... because she had worked herself into a tizzy wondering what H and I were talking about.... so angry that her face was red.... ohhh, I am going to miss her so... NOT !!!!
So, if things go according to plan,I should be out of there in less than two weeks... if they try to drag it out further than that..... too bad....
My plans are to have no plans for a little while, gonna feel so strange... and hopefully I can detox my body from so much stress of keeping my mouth shut for so long. lol..... I can't believe I am finally here ya'll. Feels somewhat surreal... but have been doing some deep cleansing breaths.... I am so ready. Thanks for all those that have supported me..... love, hugs, angels, and chocolate.
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Today was another good day. It was sunny and mild so we sat outside for an hour and a half. Afterwards we had sandwiches and lemonade.
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Send, I would not go willingly to Funafuti, Nadi, Suva, Fiji, etc… I once traveled by myself for 1 week to Bali, Indonesia. This was over 10 years ago. It was a place that was not as ‘modern’ as my little island. We live in concrete homes. These people live in tiny wooden houses. The children can be found along the road, picking coffee seeds (?) off the bushes/trees. An elderly woman was in the river, just standing there. Our guide says that they uhm… ‘use the restroom’ in the river. This is the one day road trip up to the mountain tour. I learned real quickly that using the bathroom at a small restaurant – is not like using a ‘modern’ bathroom. I was not about to complain. Option is to Use it or wet myself. I used it. =) After this trip,I have decided that I would rather not visit ‘poor’ countries. It’s very depressing.

Reverse – Most people complain but they don’t see it as complaining. But, when they see someone ‘complaining’ they criticize you. My family was like that years ago. Until I found this website. Non-Caregivers do not understand what we’re going through. I read a lot of Reader’s Digest for years. There were 2 stories that stood out to me. Both were doctors who became very sick, and had to be hospitalized. After their got well, both doctors learned what it’s like to be the sick person, the uncertainties, etc… They both have admitted that their near-death experiences now makes them better doctors. So you know what? I’d continue what I’m doing. The next time he complains, be truthful and tell him that he does the same. And then tell him that he’s doing a double standard. And until he stops complaining about his ob, you will continue to complain about caregiving. And it’s true. When he stops, you just come back here on AC and purge yourself. =)

Pam, good for you to actually find a way to get leave so that you can relax with your mom. Hope the drive wasn’t as bad as you thought. Did you bring a little pillow to put behind your back – as a support for that long drive?
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Ladee, you did it!!! Two weeks to go and no more of J to make your life miserable. Too bad you couldn’t be truthful. Yeah, yeah, I wouldn’t have been truthful either. Good to fantasize about it…

Alreme, I’m glad that today’s a good day. We take what we can and enjoy it while we can.
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Power of Positivity:

The more you are thankful, the more you attract things to be thankful for.

-------------------
Comments from other posters regarding the above...

* I'm always grateful that money always finds its way to me and my needs are always met.

* I can't believe I am saying this, but I am thankful for all the people who screwed me over, walked out on me, who put me down to ground zero... Because of you people, I am standing tall from fighting the right. And I am ROARING. I am the winner, you people are the losers. Thanks for making me who I am today.

* I am thankful that I've grown to love myself.

########
One day, with that 2nd comment above, I will be able to appreciate that my past childhood and dysfunction and all the people who have hurt me, used me, took advantage of my good nature, etc... that I will learn to stand up and look them in the eyes and say; "NO, I will not do that anymore."

I included the last comment - because that touched me. One day.. I hope to love myself...
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We're suppose to turn in our timesheet to the outsource payroll company on Mondays. The last 2 paydays, I would remind the boss on Tuesday about payroll. He would respond sarcastically, or angrily, "I know it's payroll!" Both times, he said it meanly. So, I decided to not remind him anymore.

Today's Tuesday. Tomorrow is Wednesday, a Federal holiday with the banks being closed. I did Not remind him that it's payroll. He finally remembered when it was 5pm. All well... we won't get paid on time. That's okay. He didn't like me reminding him about payroll - suffer the consequences, then. I still won't remind him anymore. I can always transfer cash from my savings to my checking if I need to pay something ASAP...
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When someone asks....

"What do you do"?

Just answer...

" Whatever it takes"!!
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On FB, they have this Search Word grid.
1. What did you see FIRST? What are you attracting right now?
(On the very first line: CSWISELOVETOUGH)
- I saw LOVE.

2
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....sorry, the cursor was on "POST COMMENT" and I accidentally hit Enter... and it Entered.

2. The FIRST word you see describes YOU! .... HAPPY
.......................
I don't think this is accurate because being a voracious reader, I always read from left to right, from top to bottom. The first line has no word spelled out. The 2nd line has the word "happy". Jump to the 5th line which has Genuine, etc...
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Well, Ya'll, don't get dressed up for my retirement party just yet... J had a heart attack at the breakfast table this morning...
She got up, was find, half way thru her breakfast she said her shoulder hurt, she was getting pale, I started asking all the mandantory questions, and asked her to show me where all she was hurting....she went from her shoulder to her back... I told H to call 911, of course he got rattled, but I quickly told him women present different than men when having a heart attack... long story short, she is on her way to Austin , her heart dr is there, by ambulance of course.... so, everything is on hold until I know what is going on....
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Oh, by the way, not a bad call for a caregiver that doesn't know what the h*ll she doing... right??
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Ladee, good call, but we are having your retirement party with or without you!
Dressing up for it is another unsolved mystery.
Do you think Jeanne will bake a cake?
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Ladee, start making good choices early to strengthen your resolve. Would you choose (J)'s heart over your own heart health?
Maybe you could advocate for temporary placement for your former client.
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Ladee, good call. I would never have guessed she was suffering a heart attack just based on that. Why is your retirement on hold? I hope you just meant - until they find the paid caregiver who is familiar with her health issues. May I remind you what I went through when dad had his stroke and became bedridden? He wanted us to fetch this and that, verbally abusive because we guessed wrong on what he was pointing at, and wanted me to do him first before mom. The list goes on.....Do you think that by suffering a heart attack, J will have an epiphany and realize her selfish and lying behaviors must cease. And become a docile and appreciative patient? Beware of those heartstrings and guilty conscience - they're sneaky. You do what you need to do. As usual, do it with open eyes and set a new limit. {{{HUGS}}}
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They are releasing her today, I just found out... and no, I'm still leaving... just need to wait and see what is going on.... Daughter said they could find nothing wrong with her heart.... so follow up with Dr's.... so still don't know my own status.... and no I won't choose her over me, but at the same time, depending on what is going on, I will choose H if he can not find help..... but they have a lot of options....so, it's till a 'go', just not sure when... and it won't be a month from now either..... I swear, I wanted to slap the oldest daughter she was firing so many questions at me.I simply go into 'caregiver mode' and tend to what all needs tending to....I had already done everything she was asking me about, the thing was, she wouldn't give me a chance to answer...... Lord , hang tight to me until I can out of there...
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Yes, there are angels among use.

Today we got home from the doctor and Mom was going to sit in the swing for a while. I checked outside a few minutes later and she was gone. She does that sometimes. She decides to go on a walk. I let her walk for a few minutes, then hop in the car to go get her if she is tired.

Today I was about to get in the car when I spot her on the ground two houses up the street. My first thought was, "I wonder why Mom decided to sit on the grass?" Well, doh, me. She has fallen.

She was okay and wanted to try to get up by herself. It was going to be challenging, so I thought of dialing 911. Then a beautiful young woman came home and came over to help. She was a PT, wouldn't you know? We got her back up on her rollator and were own our way.

And I thought about how I went out the door to get her at just the right time and the PT just happened to come home. And I knew the angels were watching out for the old woman sitting on the grass.

Mom was still shaky tonight, so I messaged my brothers. One of them called her and it was like medicine. She perked up like all was right with the world again. She is all warm and comfy. And the only damage is a wound on her wrist.
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Oh Jessie! Thank God your Mom is ok ..and isn't that amazing how everything fell into place and help there exactly when you needed it...I do believe in angels!!
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Jess, so happy your mom is ok. Walking off by herself. My mom would do that and thank goodness they do not move fast.

Ladee, good news about J. But, you take care of you. Only as long as it takes to get things lined up. OK?
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Good morning! From the left broken ankle to the right clavicle ,just wondering what else is broken, cause there's a whole lotta stuff in between. Still finding this out since falling in driveway on a friday, waiting until monday to see doctor 11/2, then yesterday 11/10, x-ray showed the broken collar bone.
Now I am sure why caregivers don't go for help and their own medical treatment.
Cannot get anything else done, and I am angry the diagnosis was delayed, in addition to discovering an ankle fracture that occured about 2 + yrs. ago: and they said it was not broken back then!!! Fortunately, these are minor breaks, but emotionally I think there is a slow burn pending in my brain. Just cannot put this in perspective. Kinda angry. Kinda depressed.
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Sendme2help, Im sorry this happened to you. I do hope u heal quickly!
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That must have been more than a little tumble Sendme! Did you tell them your shoulder hurt on Monday? It's a fact of modern medicine, they don't seem to have the time or training to look beyond the immediate problem.
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I was thinking the same thing, cwillie. I am glad you are young, Send. Please take care and heal well. I know you probably feel like a truck hit you.
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Oh wow Send...so sorry to hear all this is going on ...bless your heart...Try to take it easy and hope you are feeling better soon....wow......that's a lot going on at once.
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Send take care of yourself!
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wow...you must feel like a nightmare that came true; a wrestling that wasn't the greatest turnout; a wounded woman; a body of needed healing, and a total wreck! Have a margarita or glass of wine..but then, that might make you fall...so have a warm glass of milk and an aspirin and go to bed.....marymember
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Take care Send, all those parts are going to hurt down the line.... hope you feel better soon and get some good medical care..

Well, J did not have a heart attack... nothing wrong with her heart, so many follow up Dr's visits to come to find out what happened..... my concern is that I am going to have to remind them I am still leaving.....and somewhere in all the drama they need to find help, asap......

All that yesterday, and I had to be at work at 6 am to have her ready by 7 to go to a school function of one of the great grandsons for Veterans Day, in a town about a three hour drive from here.... whaaatttttt???? Uh Ok... so after a hurried get ready session, I had the rest of the day off....all except for the daughter that came to pick them up, second guessing if I had taken her Blood Sugar, did she get her shot, and on and on and on..... the whole mess is really starting to wear on my last nerve... you know, the one that is already frayed !!!! Sure hope this doen't turn into more drama.... but I have postponed plans with my best friend to have a girls weekend for over three months in a row because of this drama.... so guess what... I will lie and say I am already on the road....
I am beginning to think I walk into some kind of altered universe and will be trapped there forever unless I know what the magic word is.....I have a long list of words I want to use... but they aren't magic..... lol....
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