This seems to be a question that is not asked enough or we think what we are feeling is not as important as what our loved one is going through. This job we have taken on is a tough one and there are days when I think my "stress rope" cannot be pulled any tighter. Then there are other times that make those bad days just a memory. Do you feel like banging your head against a wall one day? And then the next day your loved one is attentive and loving and comprehends whatever you say? There are some who keep those feelings bottled up within themselves; others take the time for outside resources and others who look at sites such as this for some understanding. I do better when I have someone else to bounce my feelings off of. Let's face it....we aren't superhuman and besides ourselves and perhaps a family to take care of we now have taken on the responsibility of another human who is incapable of taking care of themselves. Do you breeze through the care giving without a problem? If so, I would like to know how you do it, maybe you can offer some new ideas; do you have feelings of frustration and need to talk about those? Come and talk and know that you can speak freely and without judgement and without finger pointing.
I am caring for my mother-in-law and have been for about 1 1/2 years. She has moderate dementia and incontinence. Other than that she is very healthy. Sometimes that short amount of time feels like 10 years and I wonder how long I will be able to do this job. I get so very tired of hearing the same thing day in and day out, but I have to remind myself that to her, each time she sees me, she is offering new information. At times I have no problems communicating with her, but it seems like more and more she cannot retain a thought longer than 5 minutes. We have had to make signs for her so she will know what she can and cannot do. So far it's working, but for how long? Maybe I will have to end up making her a "Book of Do Nots". She is on memory drugs, which don't seem to make a difference. So why do I continue to dole them out to her? I guess I'm afraid of what might happen or how she might act without them. I might have to rent a boat or buy a helmet! Sometimes I see something in her that leads me to believe that she could get aggressive and what would be my reaction to that? At the end of each and every day, after she is tucked into bed, I breathe such a sigh of relief. The "inner beast" is quiet at last, or at least for a few hours.
Pull up a chair and visit........I would like to know how you are coping everyday..be it good or with handfuls of stress.
No one wants to fall, but over 55, then over 65, it's a real problem.
1) sprained lt. Ankle, broken; 2) dr. Discovered old break, lt. Ankle 3) fell on rt. Knee, scraped, ignored 4) rt. Hip. Swollen, ignored, 5) rt. Elbow, scraped, ignored, 6) rt. Ribs, pain, x-ray 'normal', 7) chest x-ray, normal 8) shoulder x-rayed, broken.
D O N O T F A L L . GOAL: why is she falling? Action plan: see a specialist: neurology outside of this hmo who never orders an mri. Rest.
However, what does the rt. Rib/chest pain have to do with a broken clavicle? The pain is bad there. It must be all in my mind???
Jessebelle, love your new puffy bunny cheeks! Thanks for 'liking' my falling post. Reminds you of your mother, does it? Glad your mom is okay too. Hope you continue to cope with a sense of humor. What is in those bunny cheeks?
The bunny is the lagomorph version of Gershun's cat. It is for real, though. Some rabbits look like that. I borrowed (aka pirated) the picture for a few days.
Send, that's a long time from the time you feel to the time of the xray reading. Your clinic doesn't have an Urgent Care? Or did you mean you went to the clinic on Friday, but had to wait until Monday for the Follow-up visit? I hope you feel better and the pain eases off as the days go by. Regarding your question about rib/chest pain related to the broken clavicle? Don't know.
Ladee, I like your plan. Yep, too late, you're already on the road.
Thanks for updating us on Veronica. I really do hope they find where the fluid is coming from.
Send - when I said that Jessiebelle had good karma - was because she has been lately struggling with her mother, the accusations, etc... Yet, she's still there putting up with it all. When her mom fell, it would have been just one too many for her. Hence, although her mom fell, everything happened so perfectly - that it did not end up worse - where they would have had to go to the ER. Hence, for all that she has done, and is doing - that good karma visited her that day.
Send, I did not reference karma to you because I don't know enough of your background to say that your accident was karma. You falling - was an accident. Pure and simple. It was just an accident that could have been worse but is not. As you have surmised. I hope your aches/pains eases as the days go by...
College, thank you too. I really should not be staying up late, it does mess with my piece of mind.
Thanks Hope, Thanks Yogagirl.
City in lockdown and the President has closed the French borders
I actually yelled at a stubborn RN this morning. She did not seem to understand that postponing a 12 hour medication for 3 hours was not a refusal to take the medication
Today, four days later, she said she injured her knee in the fall and is having a hard time getting up from her chair. Her knee doesn't have any bruises or anything that shows, and no swelling. Maybe she did turn it and it just took a long time to show up.
Anyway... I'm going a bit nuts with it. She is repeating whatever caused it for the day every few minutes. I don't know if anything is really wrong, since nothing appears to be that way except that she is thinking of it all day long. We have a doctor appointment this week and if it's still bad, maybe the doctor will consider rehab. I don't know if that would work, because when she gets to the doctor she's fine and pain-free.
I've done some shopping today to narrow the choice for nursing facilities if needed. It is confusing reading reviews. Most places score about a 3 out of 5 around here. One person will write a glowing review that the place is a godsend. The next will write a review that sounds like the pit to hades had opened. I've visited some and may pick the one that is most convenient to me, since I'll probably be running back and forth.