This seems to be a question that is not asked enough or we think what we are feeling is not as important as what our loved one is going through. This job we have taken on is a tough one and there are days when I think my "stress rope" cannot be pulled any tighter. Then there are other times that make those bad days just a memory. Do you feel like banging your head against a wall one day? And then the next day your loved one is attentive and loving and comprehends whatever you say? There are some who keep those feelings bottled up within themselves; others take the time for outside resources and others who look at sites such as this for some understanding. I do better when I have someone else to bounce my feelings off of. Let's face it....we aren't superhuman and besides ourselves and perhaps a family to take care of we now have taken on the responsibility of another human who is incapable of taking care of themselves. Do you breeze through the care giving without a problem? If so, I would like to know how you do it, maybe you can offer some new ideas; do you have feelings of frustration and need to talk about those? Come and talk and know that you can speak freely and without judgement and without finger pointing.
I am caring for my mother-in-law and have been for about 1 1/2 years. She has moderate dementia and incontinence. Other than that she is very healthy. Sometimes that short amount of time feels like 10 years and I wonder how long I will be able to do this job. I get so very tired of hearing the same thing day in and day out, but I have to remind myself that to her, each time she sees me, she is offering new information. At times I have no problems communicating with her, but it seems like more and more she cannot retain a thought longer than 5 minutes. We have had to make signs for her so she will know what she can and cannot do. So far it's working, but for how long? Maybe I will have to end up making her a "Book of Do Nots". She is on memory drugs, which don't seem to make a difference. So why do I continue to dole them out to her? I guess I'm afraid of what might happen or how she might act without them. I might have to rent a boat or buy a helmet! Sometimes I see something in her that leads me to believe that she could get aggressive and what would be my reaction to that? At the end of each and every day, after she is tucked into bed, I breathe such a sigh of relief. The "inner beast" is quiet at last, or at least for a few hours.
Pull up a chair and visit........I would like to know how you are coping everyday..be it good or with handfuls of stress.
It's 340am and I woke up to the smell of cigarette smoke. My sense of smell has made a rare appearance. I can smell perfectly. The livingroom smells strongly of cigarette. The hallway leading to sis room and the bathroom on the right and the scary room on the left. Hallway smells of cigarette. Bathroom does not. I opened the left bedroom, NO cigarette. I stood outside sis bedroom. I said aloud, "I hope you're not smoking."
Sis is a chain smoker. She has had history of burning her bedroom at her rental apartment. When she moved in, I told her NO smoking in the house. Several nights before midnight, she smoked in her room. I knocked on her door and told her firmly no smoking. One day I saw her bought an air freshener. I got suspicious but kept my mouth shut. I always wondered how a chain smoker can sleep from midnight until 1or 2PM without coming out to smoke. Again, suspicious but cannot accuse...
Now I wonder if a lot of these times when I woke up with my face all stuffed up was because sis was smoking in her room.
Question: for you chain smoker, from the time you sleep, how long is it before you have to get up to smoke?
Still on the mend here and getting more movement back in my shoulder every day...
When someone I love and respect are telling me about fun stuff they did I always jokingly say "Just stick that knife in little deeper"!! They know I'm joking but I know if they could enjoy these fun times with me they would...
I was just doing a quick search in Amazon for any freebies in ebooks for passive-aggressive. Nada. So, after I'm done with the washing, I will check out YouTubes and other online websites for educational purposes. I just feel so bad for sis and yet frustrated with her. Later...
Daughter posted a sonogram of the baby on FB.... she is sticking her tongue out !!!!!!!! Already this little girl is struttin' the attitude...... can not wait to get my hands on this child.....
Nothing major going on at work.... have learned to just listen, sort of, when the daughter is off on a rant... as long as it's not directed toward me.... it's all good... As I have shared her before, ever since Cujo has been taken off the Seroquel, she is a different person...... but hey, what do I know, I only have 17 YEARS in this field....pbftttttt !!
Oh, and Book, you can get a pretty little PINK hard hat.....
Sunday. Back to doing chores, then maybe just have salami sandwich for breakfast.
Book get a length of metal pipe about a foot long just wide enough to fit over that short handle on dad's bed and that will give you more leverage and enough room for 2 pairs of hands if necessary. Home Depot should be able to cut you a length of iron pipe. don't get anything that might bend.
I was suppose to research passive-aggressive and got distracted. I spent hours taking the Are You an Introvert? No matter how many different sites I tried, I am an introvert. Then, just now, I decided to try those aptitude test. Heck, it is 100% NOT what I want to do as a career option. Okay, so I have no ambition or dream job. But really???? Please see the results of the aptitude test....
Career Aptitude Test Results
The career types most closely related to your selected attributes are:
(click on any of the careers to get more information)
Helpers--Production Workers
Rock Splitters, Quarry
Rough Carpenters
Structural Iron and Steel Workers
Helpers--Installation, Maintenance, and Repair Workers
Wellhead Pumpers
Glass Blowers, Molders, Benders, and Finishers
Industrial Truck and Tractor Operators
Agricultural Technicians
Earth Drillers, Except Oil and Gas
Everyone - I just got the internet back up. I am at my new digs. I am in the house next door to my Mom's. I have known the girl here for at least 30 years. She is very sweet. I have my own room and it is very comfortable. She I also a great cook. I am helping with bills and keep up of her house. It is weird being next door to the house. I had to keep from turning into the old driveway several times. I am now free of Bro. He texted me the other and told me to call him. I did not. He finally sent another text telling me happy birthday. I will not call him. Texting is it. I have great friends that have supported me through all this year. Including you guys. Please take care of YOU ALL.