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Well, Dad had a difficult day today and Mom is at her wits end and wants to check out of this life. After a long talk, I managed to convince her that I need her..we are a team in Dad's daily care. I gave her a long, heart felt hug, and she cried on my shoulder saying that she wouldnt be able to go on without me...She's a very private person keeping her deepest feelings very guarded, For me, today was beautiful...Mom opened up to me at last..Such a blessing, a gift and the best reward I could receive. God always places beauty in every difficult day...u just have to be open to recognize them. Another beautiful memory made, Be alert...don't miss your blessing! May u all get a good nights rest..Endless hugs to all of you. Till tomorrow..
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notlike......I see you!!!!!!!!! ooooh another FB junkie...gotta love it! I'm so sorry your Mom treats you like a red-headed step-child (see disclaimer below).....it's just heart breaking with all you do for her and she is so unappreciative. In reality she ought to be thanking her lucky stars that she has you to care for her. Hugs my friend!

Wondering.....welcome to our place..pull up a chair, make yourself at home and tell us all about it. You will find lots of hugs, support, love and whatever else you may need to get you through this rough time. Let's see if we can take your mind off of things for a while and put a smile on your face.

Taking Target to surgeon tomorrow for checkup.....he continues to get better everyday.

Hope everyone is having a good day or as good as possible......

Disclaimer: Connor has beautiful red hair stormy.....:) and I have a daughter with classic red hair and blue eyes.....and my Grandpa had red hair.......
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Wondering-welcome, and as Ladee said, we will help any way we can. Please let us know what is going on in your world. We offer listening, no judgements, and often, a way to laugh at the worst we all face. That goes for all the new posters - welcome to you all.
beck-AMEN! And welcome to the sub-club here for those of us who are taking care of both parents at the same time. We all have our own situations - raising kids, other family, ect - but many of the trials are the same. And we all need a vacation! LOL Hugs, and bless you for what you are doing.
burned-glad things are looking up. Yeah! You just keep on keeping it together...you amaze me!
Jam-Peek-a-Boo! We know you are there. And so glad for it. Sending hugs to you, and Target to keep feeling better.
Austin-I love being non-normal! I don't remember what normal felt like. LOL I have lots of quotes and signs around the house, including one that says The Only Thing Normal Around Here is the Setting on the Dryer. Which is terrible, because our dryer doesn't even have a normal setting! LOL
mis-Hi! Glad to see you stop by. Miss you. Hugs.
Ladee-Argh! for you and your son. Get a laywer. Who knows what problems your son will face because of these mistakes? You don't want to sign off too early on anything, and worker's comp might not want to pay if there's been errors. Please protect yourselves. And you are right about rock collecting being addictive. I waited 2 weeks to pick up the first one, and had to stop myself from grabbing another today:) Hugs and prayers.
Well, I didn't spend the day with my stomach in knots, because the morning slid right into being a MONDAY. Huuby's sick, running a temp, and refuses to see a doctor. Work was a bear - sometimes, co-workers can ruin your day. Mom was her unpleasant, rude self. I was told how I should be arranging my outdoor decorations, because "they would look better." You know how something can be said nicely, or said rudely? She picks the rude way. Lord only knows why. And she's out of a med, which she started on a tiraide about the nurse not asking her about it at the last visit. I know where this goes - she fired one doc down south and was asked to leave by another. So I had to remind her that I asked her, in the doctor's office, if she had enough, and she said she did. And this was after the rudeness. Not fun. My sis emailed me she had a crying spell and breakdown at work today. And one of my dogs is limping something awful-might be hip dysplasia. I am going to go now and harvest my food in Cafe World, then wait for it to be Tuesday. Thanks for letting me vent.
Goodnight, and better tomorrows.
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Yes Wondering, we will help you however we can...let us know what is going on, what your situation is, and we'll put our heads together and see what we can do... welcome by the way... this is a very safe place to have your feelings... come back and visit....

Ya'll want the good news or the bad news about son??? There is NO good news... first let me say that I am so disgusted with the Dr. in Bryan, J will have to have another surgery on his broken leg . The Dr. in Bryan has the plate and pins in such a way as the patella is two inches above where it should be and the tibia and femur are growing together.... so it will have to be fixed or he won't walk.... AND he has a BROKEN ARM!!!!!! His right arm is broken in two places, is not healing, so will also have to have surgery to put a plate in to mend the bones together.... And J tried to tell the Dr's that something was wrong with his right arm....and yes he was a butt while in the hospital, but I TRIED on more than occasion to tell them he had to have meds for alchohol withdrawals... I am not condoning his behavior in any way, beleive me,but this is not looking good for the Dr. or the hospital... Uh, ya don't send someone home with a broken arm that was never even looked at...regardless of the patients behavior.... So in some ways he is having to start all over.... and we did talk about a lawyer on the way home.... so that has been my day, and I have to go to work early tomorrow, sorry I didn't address eveyone, just tired, again.... love you all, and Wondering, there are many here who will help, I promise, some great women on this thread.....
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Wondering I am having a terrible time and have been for a while. I just cannot seem to keep up on everything. I feel like I am going to jump out of my skin. I am just unhappy with everything. Does anyone out there willing to help me?
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Good Morning ladies...I hope all of you got some rest over the weekend because, once again, it's MONDAY, and another week lie ahead with the unknown..Jst remember, we are all doing the best we can for our loved ones..keep empathy, compassion and patience as your guide. When your loved one takes you to the edge today, jst hug them..that's what I do with Dad. Sometimes there are no words to comfort them, but hugs can express what words cannot. Love today without limits.. I continue to pray for all of you and thanku for being there for me..hugs to all...bunches and bunches..
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Rachel....bless your heart and in a good way! Don't you just dislike insurance companies? Appeal the decision to United Health and in the meantime contact your homeowner's policy and get their take on your mom's "accident". I'm sure UH is her primary which would probably slow up any Medicare payments, but all is not lost. Do you have POA for your Mom? What's the wording? And if you have to make small payments each month from Mom's SS then whoever will be happy to get what they can. Don't harm yourself worrying about this.....drop that sandwich and grab an apple instead.....HUGS!!!!!
Hi mis........nice to see you here!

Severe storms roared through here last night.....over 6 hours without power....thank goodness for generators! Computer withdrawal and healing husbands can get ugly....:) Saturday it was 90 degrees, today is 70...go figure.
Hope seeme is already at her destination and is not driving into any of these storms.....prayers for a safe trip.

Sending out wishes for a good week for all of you......and an angel to help lighten your load.
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Good morning.. I had a good couple of days..coursenInwas so exhausted that I could not do much. I slept and read ..did try to ge in the yard some but didn't get very far. Had a good talk with my brother..so I am not as angry at him because I let things out. He will be coming more often on weekends ...great help and he can see that dad is not well at all. Beck..my dad has dementia at least I think with a combination of other problems..he can't do much for himse and he is very rigid..can harly move him. I have mom here too but thankfully she is I pretty good shape.
Prayers for all for a good day. Dad goes to get his ear cleaned out today...never did tell you guys that we can't find one of he's hearing aids...guess in went in the trash with the poop..will get a new mold today
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Good to hear from you Mis, hope you are doing ok, miss ya.
Hope everyone has a blessed day and Brandy and I will have knotted stomachs all day.... love ya'lll
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Long time no post, but I've been lurking to see how you all are doing cause I think of you all everyday and keeping you all in my prayers.

Welcome to the new posters. Glad that you are here. This site has certainly help me to keep my sanity over the last few yrs while my hubby and I took care of his grandma. We lost her this yr, but I still come back to see how everyone is doing. It's like family here and we all understand each other.
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Rachel..I read your post and can so relate to those sleepless nights. I am also responsible for the bills that overload the mailbox on a daily basis, and talking to insurance companies and medicare every other day is enough to drive anyone to the edge. I'm so sry that you are carrying such a heavy load, but as difficult as it is, we must take care of ourselves in order to care of our loved ones. I'm still trying to practice that thought in my own life. We can get so overwhelmed with all the duties that are required of us in caring for our families, that we neglect ourselves...next thing u know..when we're not sleeping...we're eating....at least that's what I have done. Just know that you're not alone in those sleepless moments..I know every program on numerous channels between the hours of midnight to 6am...all while eating a sandwich or two. My thoughts r with u, as well as my prayers. May u find some peaceful moments tonight. Hugs from Stockton..
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Well I'm not so numb I can't say AMEN! AMEN! Ladee, you asked a couple of days ago if I got to the doctor yet, and I have not. We have an appt on Tues. so hopefully some thing will change. I'm reading all the posts, and saying prayers. I hope everyone has a good Monday. Love, Vivian
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Rachel, your plate is full... too much going on at once. We do understand, and hope you come back and let us know how things turn out with the bills....take one baby step, try not to overeat tomorrow, get your blood sugar back to normal or close , you may feel better and can sleep better... so send them a few dollars a month, it's not like ya'll would be the only ones with bills hanging over your head... if you have homeowners, they'll pay for it.... take a few deep breaths, you are not alone, and we are here for ya... come back and vent some more if ya need too... hgus to you...
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Miserable. I posted on another board that was doing better and then I opened yesterday's mail and found out that United Health doesn't want to cover my mother's bills. They say she fell in our house and we should be liable. She went to sit down on the toilet, missed it and broke two ribs. Everyday there is something new. If I have to spend money and hire a lawyer or worse, have to pay her bills, I don't know what I will do. I know what my husband will do. He will say, "Enough!" My head is spinning. I am also eating too much from the anxiety and my blood sugar is sky high. I fall into bed at night exhausted and can't stay asleep. Even sleeping pills aren't working.
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Welcome back Jam.
Beck, I like to think it is the new normal.
Ladee, my stomach drops too, goes into a knot and seizes up. Such a good site.
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Beck- Amen!!!! And Amen!!!! Hugs to you!!!
Jam- It's good to hear from you. I am glad that Target is doing better and on the way to recovery. Sorry to hear that the col is declining. I hope you are taking care of yourself. Much love to you!!!
Ladee- I am right there with you about dreading tomorrow (MONDAY'S) UGH!!!! Love and hugs stormyyy
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Not sure who on here said it , but we are a dysFUNctional family,,, at lest there are days we have FUN, we don't fuss, we don't try to make each other feel bad, we don't compete , we don't argue about our inheritance, we don't blame, so yeah, we are a good family, something each of us needs.... glad you found a home here Beck.... hugs to you
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I already feel like this group is family..thanku..hugs and lots of love to you all
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and another AMEN-I think it was Erma Bernbeck -probably messed up her name-who said normal was a setting on a washing macine-and no normal is not a requirement for this site-it is actually not encouraged-Beck it sounds like you will fit is great with the rest of us non-normal folks.
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You have an AMEN...... love it....
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ok...here's my new thought...a posting a day keeps insanity at bay!!!!! do i have an amen?...lol
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Welcome back Jam, if only for a drive by..... love ya and miss ya...
Beck, if being sane is part of being with the group we are all screwed!!!!!! So am happy to say it is not a requirement.... and what you are feeling is normal, what you will come to refer to as your 'new normal', none of us here are NORMAL, what ever that means.... too many sleepless nights, too much angst from not having family participation.... too much hearing the same thing over and over... so yes, tears are part of this, grief, sadness, anger, powerlessness... it's all part of the territory.... but ya know what...... we do have each other... and just knowing someone else really understands gets us a little further down the road.....one suggestion I am going to make, is not to look at yourself as a mess... you are human, being torn in many directions, if we already knew how to do this we wouldn't need each other....and if you are mess, then that means I'm a mess and I ain't havin' no part of that....lol......so keep coming here, telling us how you feel, and we'll all move forward thru the fog.....hugs to you...

Ok, I've had plenty of rest this weekend, and my stomach still drops when I think about tomorrow, let's see, can we all say BURN OUT!!!!!!!!!
love ya'll and hugs across the miles....
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Good morning, new friends. Thanku for your postings..I can see that this site is going to b my new addiction...btr than the old ones..lol..Reading all these postings is a comfort to me, even though the comfort comes through the sharing of suffering and loss. I cry tears for all of you, and pray without ceasing..I havent checked in with dad yet this morning, but I pray we have a btr day than yesterday. He was so confused and repeating everything over and over. This journey has truly tested my patience! The other situation that I deal with that I never saw coming, is the position of therapist to my mother.. Poor thing..she tries so hard to keep it together, but she has regular melt-downs, and then I get the infamous 911 call that sends me rushing to the house to find mom in the fetal position crying uncontrollably, and I try to help her thru it, when,inside, I'm just as in need of therapy as she. There are times she feels suicidal, and it breaks my heart. They are resistant to any kind of home health care, so I do my best to be there in whatever capacity I'm needed. I feel so old..so tired, and very alone most of the time. I hate this disease, just as all of you. It has taken so much from so many..but then I can clearly see the blessings in it as well. My emotions are all over the map! On top of all of this, I am at odds with my 3 kids. They are not much support and it only fuels anger and resentment in me. They will have to live with the regrets that they have chosen, and when their grandparents r gone, they will have to live with what they did, and didnt do while they were here. I sound very self-absorbed, dont I? Excuse my pity-party..I dont talk to anybody about these things, then I found all of you!!!!! Anyway, between my parents and my kids, I've temporarily lost my way, and my sanity. I do have good moments,however brief..My husband is my support, but sometimes he needs a break from his mess of a wife. From this posting..do u blame him??? Going to call dad now..prayers,please. May u all find strength to get thru your day..hugs all around..
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Good Morning ladies!

I'm here....reading and following all of you....don't think for one minute I'm not here! Just needing a "brain rest"......everything here is good.....I have the meaning of my bubble tucked away in my heart....thank you notlike.....Target is healing, walking on his own, fixed a meal for himself yesterday, sleeping and back to being the person he used to be before he got sick.....been a while since I've seen him. The col just continues to be confused....doesn't recognize her own granddaughters..

Welcome to all the new posters.......come back and tell us stories..........we need someone new to make fun of......hugs and angels to all of you!!!!!
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Well CPS stop by and they did do a suprise visit and even brought some material for hubby so he can use his sewing machine and I am just grateful there were no more craziness or other foul ups but found out my kids have small yet big feet. My bff is relaxing and so is her husband; and her kids are enjoying it here. This is working out so far...now just matter of going to DES and fax time sheet and pay bills and do taxes.
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Yeah i guess i did get the cow pattie this time. Thanks Ladee.
Beck- I am very sorry you are having to go through this with your father. I know your heart is breaking. But hopefully the good memories you have and are making will replace the pain that you are feeling. My heart goes out to you!!! Much love and hugs to you Stormyyy. And welcome to the caregiver crew.....
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Cow Pattie Stormy...... !!!!!!!
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Beck, so happy you returned and shared what is going on... and also happy to hear you are making as many memories as you can as time allows... I HATE this disease, I HATE it with a passion.... my sweet S is having a very rough time right now, has declined to another stage of Alz and sitll has a tiny bit of himself knowing things are not right with him.... breaks my heart to see him so confused and getting angry because he can't find the words to express himself....
So, you keep coming here, and you let us know when you are grieving, it is not only the long goodbye, but we loose them twice.... but at least here you will get support, love, laughter, hugs and prayers... and advice if you need it.... just ask...
So many hurting people here, and we get together to lighten each others load... I have been here for a long while... not much surprises me anymore, and you will not be judged... we all have our sad days, our mad days, our tired days, and our silly days,,, it's ok to laugh too, it makes things a little easier... so keep coming back and letting us know how you are... Everyone of us will relate in some way... hugs across the miles to you, and as Jam would say, we'll keep the light on for ya.....
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Thanku to all who have welcomed me into this beautiful support system. I found all of you just in time, becuz crying alone was jst not working for me anymore. Ladee,you asked about my specific situation, so I thought I would share it with people who can relate to my everyday world. I am 53yrs old, and solely responsible for the total care of both my parents. My mother is manageable, but my father is suffering thru the beginning stages of dementia. There are moments when he is very alert and lucid, then within hours he can be completely confused and disoriented. He has always been a man of great wisdom, and an immense amount of pride. It has been extremely difficult to watch this cruel disease take him day by day. My heart is always aching and there's a sadness that surrounds my life everyday knowing that my dad is slowly slipping away. I call this time in my life, "the slow goodbye". Even though this is so painful to watch, I am thankful to God that I have been given this time to love and care for him as I do everyday. It has allowed us to have a closer relationship and when God takes him home, I will have no regrets. I love this man more than I have loved any other. He is my mentor, my best friend, and my counsel through everything. I cannot imagine ever losing him, but I know that I must face the inevitable and stay strong for him and my mother. I pray that I can endure what lies ahead. Thanks for your words of support..I need this group more than I realized..once again...I'm crying,,hugs to all
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Jam- I hope you come back soon and let us know how you and Target are getting along. I hope his recovery is fast for you and him. Missing you!!! Love and hugs Stormyyy
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