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Ladee- last time dad started coughing up the blood about 3 days before he had the stretch done and after the stretch it quit. And this time he started with the blood the day of the stretch before he had it done. So i don't know if it is coming from the hole closing up or what. It could be that maybe. Connor did have fun at the party, the kids saw a pirate movie and the party theme was done in pirate stuff. It was cute and we both had fun, it was something different for us both. Hope all of you have a good nite. Hugs stormy
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Notlike, becareful, the rock thing can become an addiction... no matter where I am I am looking for rocks.... is that normal... bhahahahahahahaha, like any of us would recognize normal..... and poor old mom, i'll just pray for her and M, no, i'll pray for us first, then them... alrighty??? They need the prayers and i need the practice.... love ya sweetie.....
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beck-Welcome! You are not the only one who feels like you do. We have all been there. This site is a world of people who care and are on the same journey. Please come back, and tell us more about your self. Hugs.
Vic-glad you are getting more help. You sure can use it. Hugs.
Stormy - we are waiting with you for word about your Dad. Try to remember that worrying will not change the answer you get on Monday. Did Connor have fun at the movies? Hugs.
brandy-Oh, can't they be mean? Next time, dance yourself all the way to the chair! Twirls take alot longer than walking:) Hugs.
Ladee-I picked up a rock yesterday, and of course thought of you. I've been stepping on it for two weeks when I'm out at work having my smoke break. So I figured it's mine now. It's orange and black. Can't tell if it's natural or man-made, but it's cool and I like it.
Took Dad grocery shopping today. That made Mom mad. Until I mentioned we were taking my car, then she relaxed. She doesn't like when someone else puts wear and tear and their van. Dad was frustrated that she was acting so awful at first, but now the problem is solved. Yeah.
I also think about you all during the day. I hope you are having good ones, and I hurt for you when you don't. I can't wait to tell you something funny, or even just the rare normal thing that happens to me. I laugh out loud reading your posts, and can see the situations we are in in my head. This site has been salvation for me. I wish each and every one of you angels to carry your loads, as you have all been angels to me.
Goodnight, and better tomorrows.
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Stormy, hasn't he done this every time the trach is stretched???? If he's not in pain, then try not to worry.... easier said than done.... of course he is worse now than this time last year, we all are....lol.....If it's not profuse amounts of blood, then it's something minor.... glad Conner got to go to a party today, and hope you had fun too.,

I am enjoying my quite time.... get so little of it.... and what is with everyone, where are you guys, new posters, we sure would like to get to know you better.... can't do that unless you post... and nothing is sacred here, we talk about everything...... and make fun of our lives.... and sometimes of our elders, and even of each other if warrented.... so come on ya'll, we can't let this thread fade into the mist.... hugs across the miles to you all...
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Hey all I talked to sis this morning while i was on my way to carry connor to a party at a movie theater a hour away. And i asked her was dad still coughing up the blood and she said that he had some in his canula this morning and some when she got home last night. I mean he acts like he is fine. Nothing hurting or bothering him. It beats all i have ever seen. He was shelling peas for me yesterday while i was cooking him cabbage, ham, and fried squash. He was fine one minute i went in the den for something and i saw blood in his canula. So i don't know what's going on. Sis thinks it is something minor like some irration from the stretching of his throat or not enough humidification. I believe it is something else. More serious. Maybe i am being pessimesstic. But i see and feel the swollen lymph nodes that have been there for a year. He is more short of breath and now he is coughing up blood. I am just trying to weigh everything out. But what do i know, i am not a doctor.

Ladee- Yes if things get bad we will definetely carry him to the ER. I hope it doesn't come to that. But i hope we will find out why he is coughing up blood monday. Love and hugs to you Ladee!!!! And to everyone else on caregiver alley!!!! Stormyyy
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Stormy, we trust that if it gets bad ya'll will take him to the ER.... and I think most of our time is spent 'waiting', waiting for them to get done doing something, for them to finish a meal, to get undressed for a shower, to take thier meds, to walk down the hall, and on and on.....Sonny has had another TIA and is so confused... it's not a UTI, I insisted that we get his urine checked.... TIA's we can do nothing about, UTI's need immediate attention.... come to find out, he was supposed to have had his urine checked week before last....She reminds me so much of Notlike's mom, if it isn't about her, then it's not important.... and I started this job with the support of the daughter, now I have to nag and call her at work and home.... this part is not my job.... but I worry about him being neglected... His blood pressure is so low on Monday mornings... because it never occurs to her to push fluids on him.....it's such a fine line being a PAID caregiver, get to do all the work, observing, and can't get the family to listen.... I won't go thru this again as I did with Ruth ending up with a UTI that killed her because NO ONE WOULD LISTEN TO ME..... I love my work, ya'll all know this, but I HATE dealing with families.....later, love ya'll
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Brandy- You are right about that. It's going to be a long weekend if he keeps on coughing up the blood off and on. I just don't know if it is coming from the biopsy that the dr did or if it is coming from something else. It's the hurry up and wait game again. We are a expert on that one. It happens all the time in our situation with dad. I hope you have a good weekend Brandy!!!! Love and hugs to you Stormyy
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Stormy, the waiting can be the worst esp. all weekend.
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Hey everyone I just talked to my sister and asked her if she heard back from the nurse that was going to find out about the biopsy results. And she said that she talked to her but that the pathology report had not come in yet. So it looks like we got to wait til monday to find out something. Dad was coughing up more blood this afternoon. I will check in later on ya'll. Love and hugs to all. Stormyyy
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Yeah Brandy, it's amazing how quickly we keep our freinds here in our mind, I have conversations with ya'll (in my head) on days that Marie is being a grumpy gussie....Like yesterday, think Sonny has had another TIA, it's not a UTI, had his urine tested, it's not that thank goodness...but saw myself posting later saying....
Put your socks on......x 6
take your pills......x 4
take your watch off x 5, ect... that's how it felt, was simply adding how many times I had to ask him to do something... and then telling ya'll about it..... what in the world would we do without each other...Never do I go to the store and get fresh green beans that I don't want to start laughing because of Notlike's mom and the beans.... And now when I hear 'SIT DOWN' I will think of you.... so we are in each others hearts and minds a lot.... like thoutgful times for the people we haven't met yet care about....
Viv, have you been to the Dr. yet??? Hope you are feeling more alive today...
Vickie Vic, glad to hear you are getting another weekend off, shoot, you'll start feeling human before no time... sans all the pain reminding us that caregiving is not for sissies......
Son is doing better each day, told him yesterday how proud I was of his attitude... if that had been me on my back and unable to do anything for the past month, there would be slimy stuff on the windows from my head spinning.....I know, why do I insist on giving visuals.... character defect I guess... oh well....
Jam, hopefully you are at least reading, know that we love ya, hope Target is on his way to mending, hope you get that garden planted, and we love and miss ya....
Seeme, have a safe trip to be with your family for your mom and dad's service.... let us hear from you when you get back....
I know I have not named some, didn't go back very far on my reading.. sorry... was able to take a very good, restful nap this afternoon and want to keep that in place , so am going to go, will check back in later... everyone have a good weekend.... thoughts and prayers for you all.... hugs across the miles....
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Beckn, So glad you dropped by to talk to us.
ladee, how are things?
It being Friday I took care of my mother. She wanted to look at picture albums so I got one out. I put it on the table and proceeded to sit down to look at it with her. Mind you, I am 60+ and don't move around all that fast. I just couldn't sit down quick enough for her. So she yelled at me, "SIT DOWN!!!!!" So I said well all right, I am sitting down as fast as I can. Then we looked at the pictures. I almost went home instead. I thought, well I can tell my friends at agingcare.com about this.
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Hey all- talked to sis this morning and she said last night some time dad started coughing up the blood again she found some on his shirt, she was asleep at the time. And she said that he coughed up some more this morning. He is asleep now. She talked to the nurse for the dr that did dads procedure yesterday and she said that he took a biopsy yesterday and that we should know something later on today. She said that his esophagus and stomach looked fine when he looked at them yesterday. That's all i know right now. I will check back in later and let ya'll know what i find out from the drs report. Love and hugs stormyyy
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Morning everyone! Pray we all have the best day possible! Liny..thank you I need that reminder! Seeme..prayers for you on your journey for mom and woohoo's for MIL! God is Good!
Dad had a bad day yesterday..hoping he will be a bitt better today. Our caregiver will come sit with him today while I take mom to salon to get her hair done. She also has Tuesday's free so she will start coming here then too. I will really help as dad is getting harder and harder to move around these days. God Bless all
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Welcome Beckncall, hope you come back and let us know your situation and how we can support you.... this is a great group.... full of love and even laughter on occassion..... hugs to you
Notlike, if the beans don't grow, go find some at the local nursery and put them in the ground....or a neighbor that has a garden, or hell I'll send you a few plants... but what ever happens, do NOT let Jack climb that beanstalk..... love ya...
didn't read very far as it is 2;30 in the morning.... what am I doing up??? Good question.... I still do this on occasion from taking care of Ruth... funny how some of this gets in our DNA.....
I finally have a day off... yeeehaaaaa, so will check in later... speaking of DNA, I check into this sight at least a few times a day... I'm so nosey, afraid I'll miss something..... hugs across the miles...
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How am I today? I, too, am exhausted and continue to question if I'm doing enough in caring for my parents. It can be a very lonely place and there are many times during the course of my day that I feel hopeless. It is reassuring to know that I'm not the only one who's having a bad day.
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Vivian-That was a high blood pressure. I hope everything goes well at the follow up appointments. Sometimes, you need to learn how to survive before you can thrive. But everyone is right - if your blah mood keeps up, go back to the doc.
Stormy-prayers for your Dad. And you too.
Lildeb-thanks, I had a great time being out. Oh my, that sounds like I escaped from an institution! Well, in a way I did, if even for a few hours. LOL I got a new cell phone case, and some candles. Spent all my money and came home. It was a good night.
The bean seeds are planted! This is HUGE. And they were planted by the woman who wasn't sure she'd be here to grow anything this year. I know the cancer will keep coming back, but I am happy for Mom that she's got this extra time. And if the d**m seeds don't grow, I will just shoot myself! JK
Goodnight, and better tomorrows.
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Thank you lildeb for saying nice things to me. The reason she isn't at sis house is b/c sis won't take her and my house is too small Thank the Lord for that!!! My other problem is that my husband has dementia as well and is mean and rude too. Sometimes I feel like ready for the NH myself.
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Letter from a Mother to a Daughter: "My dear girl, the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If when we talk, I repeat the same thing a thousand times, don’t interrupt to say: “You said the same thing a minute ago”... Just listen, please. Try to remember the times when you were little and I would read the same story night after night until you would fall asleep. When I don’t want to take a bath, don’t be mad and don’t embarrass me. Remember when I had to run after you making excuses and trying to get you to take a shower when you were just a girl? When you see how ignorant I am when it comes to new technology, give me the time to learn and don’t look at me that way... remember, honey, I patiently taught you how to do many things like eating appropriately, getting dressed, combing your hair and dealing with life’s issues every day... the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If I occasionaly lose track of what we’re talking about, give me the time to remember, and if I can’t, don’t be nervous, impatient or arrogant. Just know in your heart that the most important thing for me is to be with you. And when my old, tired legs don’t let me move as quickly as before, give me your hand the same way that I offered mine to you when you first walked. When those days come, don’t feel sad... just be with me, and understand me while I get to the end of my life with love. I’ll cherish and thank you for the gift of time and joy we shared. With a big smile and the huge love I’ve always had for you, I just want to say, I love you... my darling daughter. "

Happy Mother's Day!
By: Spring in the Air
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Renarad,thank you for letting us know about Ted's mom.... he is in our prayers and please tell him we miss him.... hugs across the miles for him....
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Renarad thank you for the note about Ted's Mom many of us know him well and sure miss his post's and I hope he is doing ok and my thoughts are with him.
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Hey all just a quick update on dad his surgery went fine. He was still coughing up some blood this morning but now that has stopped. Sis told the dr about him coughing up the blood and he said he would look into it while doing the procedure. Sis said he never called or came back so must have been nothing to it. So this morning dad told sis that he felt like there was a lump on the inside of his throat on the left side. His total thyroidectomy was on the right side. I felt on his left side of his neck this morning and could feel a little something there. Just not sure what it is. Dad has a drs appt with the dr that done the procedure may 22. So that's all the news i have for now. Ya'll have a good day. Love and hugs stormyy
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I've never posted here before, but for those of you who know Ted, his mother passed away last night.
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Hey Seeme, That made me laugh too! I hadn't realized it, but thats exactly what it looks like. Dr. Sweet Dreams is an extremely overweight woman, but I thank God she has taken mercy on me, because she is mom's Dr. I don't have insurance. Glad to hear the good news about MIL, and the stye. Have a safe trip!
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Brandywine, why the H_--! is she not being taking care of at your sister's house Being she likes her so much more! I can feel your pain and sorry your mom treats you that way. Just buy her a card and let the sister do it all maybe later then she will appreciate you, someday if that is possible. Hang in their and don't let your sister tell you that you don't go out of your way just because mom plays favoritism. Take yourself out to a nice dinner and enjoy your life.

Stormy, my husband is a high school teacher and he teaches computer technology classes. He has to make sure they learn these words as well as to make sure he gives them Math problems on the side of teaching about computer stuff. Not only that, now they have something called, 'furload or fur something days. They have no school on a certain days of the months just to have budget cut. To me this is stupid because we are cutting out on our school education and they only go for five days a wk. However, they usually go over only so many at a wk or every 2 wks. To me it is just extra nonscence and that should be taught in the language department area.

Austin and everyone else out their, what ever happen to just thank you for being their or even taking your time to get them a gift? People and especially family members can be so inconsiderate sometimes. I just try to over-look those ungrateful ones and next time I don't try as much.

Ladydee, Jam and Notlikemom, how are y'all holding up? Notlikemom, I hope you have a great time out with the girls.
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Just wanted to check in before we leave here on Saturday early. Someone has been praing for us, cause mil has decided to move into ALF on the 12th. Money is already paid and her daughter will help her move. Mil says she won't rent her house yet, if ever, so I know she is keeping it in mind that she can leave the ALF if she doesn't like it, but I think she will.

I have been practicing singing the "Pater Noster" which is a Latin Gregorian chant of the Lord's Prayer for the ceremony at the cemetary. It was mom's favorite and I tried to sing it at her deathbed. Now I have the melody down pat. Kathy is going with us on the trip. For those of you who don't know, Kathy is my neighbor and helped me with mom for 5 years. She has also been adopted by my family. But, my sisters are wondering which 2 of the 3 of us will actually make it to Illinois. LOL
Burned, glad you have your firend there for a diversion. Stormy, good luck with dad's trach. Viv, yeah, you may need a different anti. My sister takes one that put me to sleep after 4 days. I was exhausted after taking a shower, and was afraid I would forget to breathe, so maybe you need to try another........ For a minute, I ready your post wrong and thought you went to a Dr. Sweet Dreams......boy, I wanted to meet that doctor!!!! I woudln't mind having a better reason to have night sweats than just menopause!!! Thanks for the unintended laugh.......HAHAHAHA

The stye is finally on the mend after I went to the doctor for medicine.
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Ladee, Thanks, I always look forward to what you have to say, and appreciate your special attention. I will check with Dr. Sweet dreams everyone. Vivian
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Viv, possibly your anti's are too strong.... but numb can be ok sometimes for a short period, if you don't start feeling better soon, take yourself back to the Dr... there are many different ones, so hope you are feeling better soon... and it's ok that you aren't posting, some days we just don't have anything to say, not me of course, blabber mouth that I am... and yes, the description you gave was pretty much what happened.... live flies are bad but dead ones on sticky paper are even worse.... got my mind off things for a few minutes tho, but don't recommend it for a daily routine....lol
And sweetie, we all have it , the good bad and the ugly.... just because you don't feel you're's is as bad shouldn't keep you from telling us how you are feeling and how things are with you.... we feel what we feel, and we are interested in your day... hope you are feeling better soon, take care of yourself... and prayers and angels sent to you with love....
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Hello Everyone, I havn't been here for several days, I'm starting to think my antidepressants are just making me numb. I'm checking in everyday, but it seems I'm at a loss for words. Burned, I'm so glad your friend has finally arrived, and you have something positive going for you. Stormy, I've been praying for you, I think things always seem worse when we come back from a vacation. I hope all went well with you Dad's procedured today. Brandy, Notlike gave you the same advice I was going to give. Besides that we don't have much money so my mom usually gets a card and some kind of flowering plant. She grew up dirt poor and is happy with anything. I have a sister who usually buys her some kind of jewelry, shes the gift giver since she can't seem to help out in any other way. I don't have a job outside of taking care of mom so I can't compete with that, but honestly I don't try to compete with anyone. Ladee, loved the flypaper story, I had a visual of flailing arms and flying hair. I would have been so grossed out. I love your humour. Glad your son is on the mend. I spent 6 hours at the ER last Friday cause mom's BP was 211/91. They ran alot of tests, ekg, exray, blood, urine, and said everything checked out ok. They gave her a pill to quickly bring the pressure down and sent her home. I slept 12 hours on Saturday, Mom didn't even try to wake me up. We have 2 follow-up appts next week I hope we well find everything has stabilized, except she still says her vision is blurry. Notlike and Seeme, I have truly appreciated your advice since I found this site. I was so excited in the beginning, I'm feeling disappointed that most days I feel so blaaze' (sp) I don't know what to say. I do check in and say prayers and it is a reminder that so many others situations are worse than mine. Peace and Blessing to everyone.
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Sweet...my friend will be here soon ..landed in phoenix last night and caught the shuttle heading into town this morning....should be here anytime soon...be so nice to see her kids and decompress girl style...I never knew how starved I was to see a familiar face but I am praying God works miracles for the both of us.
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Stormy-I hope you get some answers. Hugs.
Brandy-hang in there! More hugs.
Ladee-Are you sleeping at all? Eating? You sound run ragged. Although you are still funny:) Blessings and hugs to you, and hopefully some rest.
Checked in early tonight because I am going out to dinner with a girlfriend. Seems pretty quiet since I got home. Maybe I can relax and enjoy myself.
Goodnight, and better tomorrows.
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