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I just wanted to let you know that what you do is selfless and while you may not feel appreciated know that you are. It's good that you have things like this forum to vent because as caregivers you need that outlet. I've also picked up a couple of books and related to Still Have Faith by Micheal Stalter. While he writes about dealing with his wife's breast cancer I think his 20 year ordeal can relate to the frustrations and void that you feel. I just wanted to pass that along.
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Bubbles back to you Jam, If we need you we will scream until you answer...You are always here for us, so you deserve a break, thank you for starting this thread. It has been a life line for so many of us, and will continue to be.... prayers for you always....and we know you are really not getting your house in order, you will be setting on the swing outside blowing bubbles... love, hugs and deep appreciation.
Notlike, that was one of the most beautiful things I have ever read... I will never look at a bubble the same ..... thank you for sharing that....
We are such a great group here, so much love and support, let's make Jam proud and keep things going.....let her know she was a good mama hen, she taught us well, and I know she deserves a break..... love to you all, hugs and angels...
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Good Morning!

Thank you all for your good thoughts and caring for me....yes, it's been a tough couple of weeks and not over yet......so I have decided, for the time being, to take a break from posting here and get my home back in order. I will still try to keep up with everyone and read what is going on in your lives......you ALL are important to me and this thread and site are so helpful in keeping us sane by allowing us to reach out and touch someone that we might not be able to otherwise. The bond of care giving is unique and if someone has never done it then they don't have a clue how it changes and shapes us, but we all know without having to explain. So, I'm thinking of you all and sending you a bubble to make your day peaceful........Jam
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Jam-so sorry for your loss. A bubble - a circle (of life), a shiny, wispy thing (a soul), floating (free) - what a wonderful message from your pet. I don't beleive in coincidences. Just the Lord's hand in giving us peace. Hugs.
Ladee & Starri-sounds like you had a good day. Great you are getting time to visit! Is Starri hooked on rocks yet? LOL
Loyalty-Maybe try saying "Oh yes, that was good when you ate it a little while ago, we'll have more later." Might make them quiet down awhile??? Hugs.
Went out with hubby last night to hear his brother's band play. Didn't drink, just listened to music and saw friends. It was great. But littlest dog still wanted to be fed at 4 AM! Will need a nap today (me, not the dog!)
A blessed day to you all.
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Son update, he is doing very well, and thanks for all the prayers and concern for his mama!!!! And him too of course... so far, Stormy, he is doing ok without a drink, don't know how it will be when he can walk again... but it's in God's hands, just trying to do this one day at a time....
Yeah, took Starri on a sight seeing tour, she got to take pics of old barns and feilds of wildflowers, we ate, talked, and were pooped when the day was over.... it was nice to get away for the day... son is doing well enough for me to be gone for hours now....
Hope everyone had a blessed day, and Loyalty, my heart goes out to you with the repetition thing, I think out of all the stuff we do, that is the ONE that makes me the most exhausted.... what time is it??? Who is coming to pick us up??????

I think you need a laugh so will share about the night my lady Ruth was pacing and trying to get out of the house... she was an elopment risk, so all the doors had key locks, now this night, she was worked up and had been fussing and paceing and trying to get out of the house for HOURS... her hair was wet from sweat, she was so worked up.... I knew she wouldn't calm down until she felt like it, so was just keeping an eye on her, or so I thought... this woman had bones of steel, I never worried if she took a tumble, it was just a bitch getting her up off the floor... well she tripped over her own feet and down she went, she's still fussing and fuming and kicking, but I thought ok, I'll just change her pants while she's down there... she was not hurt ya'll, I checked her... so I get everything ready and pull those pants off and I swear I will never be the same.... she had somehow managed to get three table knifes and a damned banana in that diaper.... not alot shocks me, but I am telling ya'll, I was stunned speachless..... so after I get her changed and she had calmed down, I got on AC and posted what had happened... OMG we had fun with that one for a long time, I was nicknamed Chiquita, many banana jokes were passed among us... so, hope ya'll enjoyed this little memeory of my lady Ruth, God rest her soul... no matter all the craziness and the exhaustion, and the repetition, I miss her still... hugs across the miles to you all...
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Jam- i am very sorry for the loss of your doggie. They are like our children; part of the family. And when you lose them it just breaks your heart. I too believe that the bubble was from your doggie telling you that everything is fine. I am not having anymore dizzy spells and i have never had a migrane. Thank the lord. Thanks for the concern. Love and hugs stormyyy
Burned- I hope your daughter is feeling better, and i hope you will be able to get a break soon. I know you must need one with having to take care of your husband and kids. Hugs to you!
Loyal- I hope you are able to get outside soon, it is suppose to get up to the high 80's next weekend where i live, maybe it will get that warm where you live too. hugs!
Ladee- how is your son doing? and how is he doing without the drinking? take care, hugs to you too. I hope you and starri had a good time!!!
lil'deb- how it going for you? Thank you again for the hug. I hope you have a good weekend. hugs.
If i missed anyone i am sorry, i hope all of you have a good weekend and a better week ahead. Much love to you all... stormyy
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Loyalty, where in world do you live? We hit 83 here in GA. That must had been some good potato salad. mnl likes her mac/cheese and now I found it in a small micro-wave and stock up on it. Yours on the other hand will go bad. However, the pickles can last forever almost, slice some up and give them to him if it will keep him quite and if it will give you a peace of mind.
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For 3 days and nights all I have heard is I want a pickle and potato salad, even tho we've had it recently, I am ready scream. Warm weather please come so I can go outside on my porch. I don't think people realize what we go through..
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Jam, I am glad that Target is doing a little bit better and I am very sorry for your doggie loss. Making decision like that is always hard for they are like our own children. He is in puppy heaven looking down on you.

Everyone else, I hope y'all had a little bit of a break today and I hope the tummy ache for burn'a little girl will go away real fast.
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Yes Jam, that was blind doggie telling you everything is fine.... bubbles always have a rainbow of colors in them.... she is telling you she is whole and happy... hard for you to do, but it is the ultimate decsion of love...hope you are ok today and don't let Target make it worse....
Starri and I are going to visit today....don't think there will be too much else, as I have been feeling a tachycardia episode coming on.... but what do you do when there is no one to help with my son and you have to work... you just do what needs to be done.... then pay the consequences later I guess...
Marie's last shot in her hip really helped.. her pain level was a 2 yesterday, she was in a great mood, laughed and talked alot, I felt like I was in the Twilight Zone, I am happy she is feeling better, and hope she continues to improve, it makes it better for all of us.....
Ok, going to go clean out my car so starri has a place to sit....lots of rocks and McD bags to get out of there....love ya'll and hugs across the miles....
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Good Morning!

Wanted to check in and let everyone know I'm thinking of you all........and also wanted to give you an update.
Target is doing a little better this morning I think. Still having terrible pain in his right knee....that seems to be the problem now....incisions are just a nagging irritation.......the sad news is that I took my doggie into the vet yesterday morning to be sent to doggie heaven. I laid down yesterday afternoon for a brief nap and dreamed that she was with Target's poodle whom she dearly loved......yesterday I had to go into the pharmacy and while driving up the street a huge bubble floated across in front of my car.....I quickly looked and there wasn't a child or adult in sight.....was that my doggie telling me goodbye?

I hope everyone has a good day and will check in later.....hugs and angels!!!!
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Burned-still praying for you. Hope your daughter feels better.
Ladee-Hope you had a good day and get some rest this weekend.
Hubby, son, and I did a bonfire tonight. Dad even came out and sat a bit. Don't worry, Fire Fairie, we were safe! Made hot dogs and marshmellows. Yum Yum. Another wonderful evening with almost no Mom interaction. My soul needs these times of peace.
Goodnight, and better tomorrows.
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well I had to pick up my daughter from school today...she wasn't feeling well. She fell asleep in class and I made an appt for her to see her doctor. She been complaining of her tummy hurting and then having a nasty cough that still hasn't gone away meanwhile working myself like crazy to prove these ppl from the govt that whoever made these allegations are liars and fools. Yes still tad upset but it still it was the "very" last thing I needed..so far wont know anything until sometime next wk. Ty for keeping me in ur prayers and support.
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Burned, hope things get better for you soon. let us know how things are going...
Vic, glad to hear dad pooped....
Notlike, yeah , we don't have to worry about going to hell, we are already there.
Jam, hope Target is doing better today and you got some rest
Seeme, hope your eye is better today.
Friday, keeping it simple.... later love ya'll
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Burned - prayers for you. I know it seems awful right now, and it is, but maybe there will be a silver lining...maybe things will fall into place and you'll get more help. I will keep praying for you. Hugs.
dchurchill-sounds like an excellent doctor who cares about quality of life - including yours! Hope it's a good trip. Hugs.
Ladee-Marie is just as bad as my Mom. I cringe when I read how she treats you and Sonny. I like the BA in heaven idea. I'd go more dark with that, but I'm not in the mood tonight. I'm trying to forget about her for awhile :)
Jam-the doggie probabaly goes in circles from what the seizures have done to her brain. My sil's dog had a few strokes and did the same thing. We're happy to hear she's recovered. Wolf!
Hubby and I made dinner together. He can be so silly at times! We talked, and laughed, and I could pretend for a bit it was just us in this house. I needed that. He says things out loud that I used to hush him for in case Mom would hear. I don't do that now, so I figure that's an improvement.
Parents went to the ballpark today on a tour with their Bible study group, which they joined yesterday. I'm happy for Dad - I know he's wanted to get out and do things so bad. They also paid me for stuff I've bought for them this month. So it was a good day all around.
Itching to get out and work in the yard, but it needs to warm up first!
Goodnight, and better tomorrows.
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Burned..prayers coming your way. I admire your strength and spirit. We all get so zapped from jumping through hoops. God Bless
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Wow burned, this is horrible!! Hang in there, it will probably blow over. I am sure if they thought there was a problem, they would have removed your children immediately. Sorry you are going through all this!
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I am doing ok but i am sapped of strength and spiritually...I am being attacked for how I care for my family and my husband. Its not right...I am on limited budget and funds. I can't always buy shoes that fit my son or find clothes that fit my daughter. I do not even shop for me...I shop for them but I will be happy when my friend is here. Right now this has me so low...i feel like the victim and I am the victim; so are my children and my loving husband. I take care of everyone even with my anxiety disorder and depression; I do it all...I can't get help unless I beg for it and told to move. I have to move to get better services....wth. letting out some vent ttyl Peace
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burned....I am so sorry to hear you are now having to go through this after all you have going on already. Was this the result of someone reporting you or a part of getting everything approved for food stamps and other assistance? I know you have mentioned all the agencies that are making you dance in circles and jump through hoops. Please keep us up-to-date on what is happening....hugs to you!
stormy....have you ever had a migraine? Sounds suspiciously like one.....or the result of stress....:) You had asked what happened to my dog.....it's part of a master plan to make me crazy.....uh huh....took me a couple days to figure that one out! It was Saturday night and I was dealing with Target, when the dog starts screaming and when I see her she is flopping all over the place, tongue hanging out, incontinent of urine, not responding to anything....I've dumped Target in the floor so I can't stay to deal with her, but made sure she couldn't hurt herself, she had flopped into a bathroom. And the other 3 dogs were almost on top of her so she wasn't alone. Anyway, the next morning I was sure I would have to take her in and send her to her eternal dirt nap........she woke up, got out of her bed, and did her thing outside like she didn't have a care in the world. What she is doing now is what she has done since.....walk in a circle over and over and over....I stop counting at 50 times....strange.

And some of you are full of news! Good legs, not so good legs, getting the cold shoulder, PINGO!!!!!!! And beans....woohoo!

Love and Hugs to all of you!
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So sorry burned......Praying for you and hubby and kids..........
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Burned who do you think reported you to CPS it seems to me you do more than one human being is able to do with all on your plate-I hope there is someone close to you that can help you-what does your husband think about this?
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Burned, Ive been on this thread for about 3 weeks, and I have read what you are going through. Sheer Hell. I am praying for you. I'm not really a church goer, but I know there is a God. You are under attack by the devil himself for all the good you are doing. I've been sitting here trying to think of something I could say to make it better, but I can't. I am going to have a long talk with God on your behalf. I don't pray enough, so right there says He is using you to draw people nearer to him. Keep us posted. Love to you and your beautiful family.
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Ok these were going fine...fine as in relatively ok and no harm being said until last night I had Child Protective Services at my house second time in 2 yrs. They are going to follow up next wk and then Ill know the verdict; trust me this is last straw for my family. I do all that I can yet someone feels I am not being a super mom and this hurts more than anything else that I know of because I am at my breaking my point now because this is ridiculously and mildly retarded...so forgive me if I am not in my usual standard mood. I have been under too much stress to continue this battle and now they are escalating with the threat of removing my kids. I do apologize but I am nearly done and losing all confidence in myself. i need some encouragement and strength so please say some prayers for me.
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Hey all- I've felt kinda dizzy this morning and my eyes felt glassy and just not right. All this happened while i was driving back home from carrying connor to daycare. I just wanted to hurry back home. Cause it was just making me feel uncomfortable while i was driving. Called sis and asked her if i could come in later at dads cause i didn't want to get back out on the road right now. So she is up there with him now. Been feeling really sleepy too. So i don't know what is causing all of this. It came on me so sudden. Love and hugs stormy
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Vic, yeah for the poop! Loyalty, maybe you should add a pregnancy test to that list. LOL.
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Good morning all. Still hanging in there. Fed mom 10 minutes ago, now she's giving me a list of things she wants to eat, think she would eat all day if I could find the time to bring it to her. Right now she wants a pickle and potato salad, lol.
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Morning all...hope the day is as good as it can be for all. Yaay..the crown went to good use! Dad pooped! Hahahaha.. Love and prayers
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Me to
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Ladee, I just have to say "Amen Sister!".
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Notlike, the more I hear about your mom, the more I am convinced that your mom and Marie are kin somehow.... I told Marie that Sonny needed new underwear, She had THREE closets full of clothes, gets new underwear all the time... and you would have thought I asked for her first born.... I many times just go around her and call her daughter when Sonny needs something... and when he has to go to the Dr. OMG, what an ordeal for her... she goes at least three times a week.... while she was gone to get her hair done today, I gave him a Tylenol, he had been rubbing his hands... he was hurting, but will never tell me, and she will find some excuse to not give him something, so I waited until she left....and as she takes it by spells to talk to me like a dog, she never lets up on him, I intervene many times... it's true that Sonny doesn't remember in three minutes, but I do..... I just pray there is a BA ( Bitches Anonymous) in heaven and they have to go thru some hoops before God opens the gates.... And hopefully God will ask them, do you remember when you said such and such? Well, now I'm going to allow YOU to be on the receiving end of that, so you will know how you made people feel....
We got into yesterday over lunch...she could give a big fat happy damn that my son is still unable to do much for himself.... as long as SHE is tended to....
Vickie Vic, wrote to you this morning about the crown, and my post got lost in cyberspace... so congrats for hanging in here with us and putting up with us all this time.... thought about you and everyone else today.....realizing the one thing that beats down a caregiver is always being TIRED... tired when we go to bed and tired when we get up... if we get to sleep...and then everything that has to enter our brain becomes distorted, we are cranky, short tempered, angry, and on and on... it's the kind of tired no amount of sleep will cure, it is a sign for us to get the hell away for awhile, new scenery, new everything, because our brain can not take one more day of it, yet we do it anyway.... and then we just get bitchy because we are bitchy.... I am so very grateful to know I am not alone, and that Jam created this place for us to come to and just say HI if we can't do anything else.....love ya'll.... hugs and angels.
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