Follow
Share
Read More
This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Find Care & Housing
Time to get ou the old capris....put on the denim ones so they don't clash with my patriotic legs...............you know, the white legs with the red and blue veins....they say khaki goes with everything............
(7)
Report

Anyways enough about the whoo-ha...I hope everyone has a great day, id say my favorite day of the year is with every season change...I can pick one I love most..that perfect first day of spring when everything coming back to life...the colors of the air are even brighter...summer nights when its warm enough to be outside at night enjoying the stars, cool enough to
(1)
Report

Good morning everyone!!! What a beutiful morning....birds chirping....elderly chattering...the pitter patter of little feet...and then I wake up! Realize...the pitter patter is the sound of the kids running away from the elderly barking at them! Oh well the sound of the birds are nice:) I really feel for auntie, she told me she woke up in the night and someone was in her room trying to do something. I ask if she had a bad dream. No. What were they trying to do? I don't know, something bad. Oh, well what did you do? I just turned over away from them and went back to sleep. My hubby says that has to be scary. And it would be. She's done that kinda thing a handful of times. Old friends might remember her thinking the children were throwimg fire at each other last summer. She went months without doing that and I bet its happened 4 times since she got sick before christmas. Its like I can see what's coming...but don't know exactley what it is. My husband was talking last night about how we are not taking care anymore of the person he's know his whole life, she's not even who she was one and a half years ago.
(1)
Report

Mine would probably be summer early summer that is before it gets too hot like june.
I like spring but hate the pollen and all the sinus problems it brings with it. Can't wait to wear my shorts, tank tops and flip flops!!!!! Dad hasn't been feeling good the last couple of days. His breath was short yesterday and last night from what brother said since he stayed with dad last night. He is asleep right now so i better go wake him up and start my daily ritual..... Hugs to all of you for a great day. Love, stormyyyy
(0)
Report

Well, spring has definitely sprung. We had a brief shower early this am and now every puddle is ringed with pollen. I like spring but my favorite is fall. Spring just seems so short. I've been out on the patio hoping the birds will nest in my new birdhouse. Kathy's g/son was here yesterday and I showed him, and he understood it was for a bird.

I was going to buy new sneakers for walking, but hubby wants to go with me, so will do it tomorrow. Fine. If he gets an opportunity to find shoes at a wide shoe warehouse, it is a good thing. Putting shoes on him is like like trying to get shoes on a duck......but can that guy swim!!!!

Hope you all have a great day.......step away from the hole.......I am going to plant some ivy in containers for my sunroom. Something about live plants get me going..............
(0)
Report

thanks Jam for bringing me back to 'here and now'. Guess I love any time of year I can be outside without twelve layers of clothes or an AC strapped to my back. Anytime I can hear birds, even on the grey days, there is beauty to soothe the soul. Many of us are looking forward to getting our hands dirty in real dirt instead of all the other stuff that gets our hands dirty. ( How many times can you use... dirt or dirty in one sentence!) Yes, I slipped over the edge at some point yesterday, I sorta like it here, not quite in touch with reality.... possibly hearing birds when there aren't any... hmmm, yeah, I like it here...
(0)
Report

Amen Jam! Love the early mornings when I sit outside and look upon the world..dad is snoring away and mom isn't up yet. I have a little time to me to watch the sun rise and see the flowers blooming.
Have been down in the dumps these last few days..stress of the daily routine and mom and I haven't been getting along. Today will be a better day..
(0)
Report

Good Morning Posse!

Goodness, it sounds like a vacation is in order for some care givers......I wish I could send all of you away for a month to rest and sleep and not listen to the rantings of dementia.

I was standing outside this morning listening to the world waking up and thinking about my favorite time of the year and I thought that would be a good question to ask and maybe take your mind off care giving for a few moments......what is your favorite time of year and why? Mine is a certain day in the month of May....never happens on the same day.....when I look outside and the temps are warm, the sun is shining and everywhere I look it's a brilliant green and the sky is the color of a robin's egg.....in the early morning I can hear the different birds waking up.....my garden plants are growing, the flowers blooming.....it's humbling to look upon this world that God created for me to see. Just for a little while think about your favorite time of the year........instead of poop in wheelchairs and pottying in the closet, not eating and arguing..............

Happy Trails,
Jam
(3)
Report

Spent most of yesterday trying to keep Sonny from using the bathroom in the closet. That's it for me, love ya'll.
(0)
Report

Well, 2 years ago today me and sis started taking care of dad. March 15, 2010 was when he had his tumor taken out and his trach was put in. It's been a long two years.................. I hope everyone has a good day tomorrow and a better weekend. Love and hugs stormyyyy
(2)
Report

brandywine, you sound like your plate is overflowing, and i thought i had it rough! My nemesis is the longevity of my caregiving more than the difficulty. My mother was fairly independent when she first moved in with me, she walked with a 4-prong cane, came out and took care of her own simple meals, took a taxi to her MD appts (supplied by her HMO) and, really, seemed to enjoy helping with laundry, dishes and whatever she could do. Mail was delivered to our door, so she could mail her own things, receive her own mail and I was working full time. Come to think about it, I really had it made then--but that was 13 or so years ago. She is now 83 yo, has broken her shoulder, hip and is now too scared of falling again to do many of the things she could do before. Not that I blame her, but I have tried to get her to go to PT, which she balks because they make her work! Reason I am pushing it is that she has had bowel problems for decades but, like everything else, it has gotten worse over the years; now she is unable to pull up her diaper all the way when she uses the toilet, so when I am not around to assist her each time, she propels herself around in the wheelchair, pants half-way down her butt, and pooping all over her chair, bed linens, clothing and whatever else crosses her path! Her leg brace bothers her so any more, that she does not wear it at all around the house, so she twirls on one foot like a ballerina. Sorry to be so descriptive, but it is true. She doesn't like for me to tell her what to do or scold her for not following doctor's orders. Anyway, best go do my appeasin' time. God bless all!
(0)
Report

Evening all, sounds like some of you had the chance to get out side, that is always a pleasure after being cooped up for the winter. Sheila good to hear from you again.

Glenn and I are still in Needles, and we're going to be having more baby goats sometime this evening, we had 4 doe's a few nights back, they are soooo cute, Vic, that is a good idea about sticking him outside..lol.. We figured it out today and we've been on the road for 7 months almost and 5 of them have been spent in CA, I am so ready to be out of here.

If all goes as planned, we'll be pulling out of here on the 29th, and heading over the border to Surprise, AZ. should be there late afternoon on the 29th or early morning on the 30th. Depends on how hard we want to push it driving. Will probably only stay a day there, might stay two, don't know yet. After that it's off to TX, I'm figuring a 6 to 7 day drive, and there we're going to hole up a month maybe more.

I am so looking forward to being there.. : ) have a sweet, sweet ladee I want to meet. I hope that all are having a good evening, and get some well deserved peace.
(2)
Report

Burned, I don't think the landlord can raise the rent bc of a guide dog. That is a special case, not just a pet. You might want to look into that.
(0)
Report

Welcome back Sheila. Wow most of you have it worse than me, if we are to compare. I do have 2 senior to take care of and sometimes I feel I need the rubber room. Haven't had a vacation in years and when I did my husband ruined them. He has mild cognitive impairment. Didn't fully realize this until he got us into a terrible auto accident, where I nearly died and am still suffering, 2 yrs later. Mom is a handful as well. Now she won't bathe and she has developed whiskers. I dread Fridays, b/c that is my day to take care of my mother, God Bless her. She is so cranky and crabby. I can't do anything right and she takes the Lord's name in vain. By the time I leave her house, I am shaking. So tomorrow is the day. I am sorry that I have not kept up with everyone's situation. I have a lot on my plate.
(1)
Report

Morning all..so sorry about your son Ladee and your worries..wish I could ease the burden
Notlike..I will join you and dad out walking too! Ha..may wind up in the laundry room with you!
Seeme..can't wait to hear about puppies! Are you taking something for the IBS? When I had it bad I remember that the pink stuff worked..can't remember exactly what the recipe was.
River..so glad you had mom with you ...sending hugs back to you! They sure do make a difference in the day. Hope you had sleep last night.
Burned..you are a great person! What love must be like in your house! Wish all your business stuff gets settled soon..
Jam..I was in the yard yesterday! It was so fantastic to be outside and not worry about mom and dad. Hubby was taking care of dad. Gave me some space. Would you come plant my garden?! Need help weeding the flower beds too! Haha
We have he same problem with grass and the septic tank
Starri..make Glen a bed outside and tell him he can only come in at certain times!! Close quarters do test marriages..look how far you guys have come!
Sheila..God bless you and hubby..
Not much change here..but hubby is taking the physical load off for me.
Stormy..you sound good..how's dad doing?
Pray everyone has a good day.
(0)
Report

Good Morning Posse!

Sorry I haven't posted but know that I am reading and keeping up with each of you! I worked outside yesterday in the sunshine and warm weather...too irresistible to not be there....finished raking leaves away from the fence, son mowed, I planted the lettuce in the garden, and put down new grass seed over the septic tank area....hopefully that will grow this year but I have my doubts.

No changes in the col....she just sits in her chair looking at her lap when and if she stays awake. I know part of that is the Seroquel but the alternative is getting herself worked up and anxious because she wants to come home and can't so better to be in her own little world.

Sheila at one time or another some of us have had to make a list of who is posting on which thread, that makes it easier to keep straight........

I hope everyone has a good day and gets caught up on lost sleep....will be thinking of you again today!

Happy Trails,
Jam
(0)
Report

Welcome back Sheila, the wonderful thing about so many different threads , is that they help in many different areas..... variety, the spice of life...
Son had another grand mal seizure yesterday, scaired my granddaughter half to death, and me... prayers for him please, to PLEASE go to the Dr. and find out what is wrong...I felt so bad for my granddaughter... scaired her so bad... she has seen him have them before, but has never been alone with him when it happened... He hit the floor so hard I heard it from my house! Was putting my shoes on when she came running....the neighbor even heard it....
Could not go to sleep, today is my long day so I need to get going... love to you all.
(1)
Report

I also go to both threads-after a while you will get people straight-both groups have great folks on them.
(0)
Report

I'm baaaaaaaaack. I took a hiatus. Like the TV stars. The last I was here, I think it was when my husband Alan just had his third stroke just before Thanksgiving. Call me bad, but, if he hadn't had the stroke, which lead to yet another hospitalization and NH rehab, I don't think I could have done even one more day of caregiving. I was just that totally wiped emotionally and physically. I decided to take a step back from here to get COMPLETELY away from anything to do with caregiving and regain a short stay in Normalville. He was discharged to home Februrary 1st. He was home only one night, then suffered a TIA the next morning. Back to the ER, hospital and NH rehab. While he was in the hospital, they performed a stent procedure for his left carotid artery; his right is completely occluded, so nothing to be done about it. He's back home as of Tuesday. I must say that so far, it's going better than before. One big help is they gave him a hospital bed for home. He's incontinent, and we have a king bed, so I was washing three loads of bedding every day. I never found the answer to leakproofing. He can't move off the waterproof pad in the hospital bed, and even if he does wad it up, the twin size bedding can be done in one load.

Now friends, I have a question. I'm posting this to both "No One Ever Asks How the Caregiver is Doing" and "Toothbrush" because I started off posting to both. I love y'all but I'm having a devil of a time keeping it straight who's in which group, and I just can't choose one group over another, because they're both great! I know there's a few of you that double post. I was just wondering if anyone had every thought of combining groups. I know. I know. What's this newcomer upstart thinking, coming in here and trying to change everything up. Any thoughts, anyone?
(1)
Report

What a long day. I am whooped. Didn't sleep last night. Migraine and who knows what else was tryin to do me in. Went to sleep at 5 am! Got up at 730am. Had my mother home these last few days. My sis from CT took her back to the living center today. Took care of my grand daughter Abbey again today. How lovely to walk with a two year old! I understand how precious those grandbaby hugs and kisses are. Abbey gets real close to my face and whispers I love you gramma! And then she throws her arms around my neck and laughs that wonderful little laugh. It makes trouble just slide from my shoulders. I have decided just today that the most precious thing I have experienced in the last several days has been a hug. Hug from my mom who is slowly leaving this realm. Hug from my sister that I rarely see. Hug from my grand daughter who hugs with such wild abandon. Just a hug but so much more. I read somewhere that a person needs about 50 hugs a day to feel emotionally well. Don't know if that is true or not, but just getting the 5 or 6 that I had today made the world feel a little lighter and brighter. So hugs to all of you folks who need a hug ( + 49 more just in case). I am about to fall out on the keyboard so good night. Prayers for all of you dealing with loss and sadness and stressful economics and crazy neighbors and isolation and lonliness. I find myself cuddled in the Everlasting Arms when life is too difficult. I hope each one of you can feel those same comforting arms tonight.
(2)
Report

Notlike, if she asks tell her it was a math problem about paper plates and bowls....
(2)
Report

Seeme-Hey, we're always walking in the shopping cart/bag lady line! Seriously, I need to loose some weight, so does Dad, so I have to get motovated, at least a little bit. Yesterday I walked, today I bought Hagan-Daas. Oh well. Walk with us anytime...I usually wind up in The Laundry Room LOL
Burned-you are so busy! Enjoy your dinner out.
River-such a sweet moment for you for the anniversary. Hugs.
Ladee-If you don't stop making funnies, like rusted hips, Mom's going hear me laughing and know I'm not studying in here! OMG, do I sound like a teenager or what! :)
Jam? Jam? Everything okay? Didn't see any posts from you today. Thinking of you.
Dad had a horrible headache today, and of course I didn't have the med my sis said works for him, so I left work early to get some and bring it home. He's feeling better now.
Good Night, and better tomorrows.
(1)
Report

Well there was a mix up and i will hear in 24 hrs whether a new appt is gonna be set up and we been with this company for a long time ....ticks me off that i still go thru the three ring circus but got medicaid deal straighten out just have to fax my paystubs to them and the case is settled until april...right now kids having a blast tg for their joy and I promise my 7 yr old daughter some one on one time in a local chinese/cantonese restaurant in town on friday when I get paid ...i am curious as to what the union rep is gonna present to me tomorrow...wish me the best of luck trying to meet this deadline for hubby and it drives me stir crazy.
(0)
Report

Just got back from getting all kinds of hugs and kisses from my grand angel... I just want to eat her up.... she is going to work with me Friday, so I will get some one on one time with her without her dad hoovering and sucking all the air out of the room.... will take pics and post of FB....
Marie is being such a drama mama about the pain in her hip, fianally asked her if she needed to go to the ER... of course not.... I have cut her toenails before and hear all that sucking air , so I think she has a very low pain threshold. Of course if all I did was set all day, I'd focus more on my back and leg hurting too.... God woman, get up and move around, that hip is probably rusted !!!!
tomorrow is my long day so hope I get to go to bed early... it gets so boring being there for hours and hours... I know, boo f**king hoo!!! from all of you sleep deprived and worn out... but I've had my turn at 20 hour days... might be there again...
Hope everyone had a blessed day in some kind of way.. we really have some positive people posting and it feels so good to read of your days.. and nights.. and yet a splash of God and uplifting comments... look forward to reading posts from you all... love and hugs, coffee time...
(1)
Report

river, I love the Mom & Dad Anv. story! You a great daughter and super human being for not giving up on them and tackling the healthcare system head-on! Many people just give up, and that's probably what the health care professionals are used to, so when they run into a determined caregiver, I think they really do not know how to react...thereby, over-reacting ...Go figure....
You are a great example for me to remember!....Thank you! Enjoy your evening!...Take care! ((((((((((((Hugs!))))))))))))
(1)
Report

I am still waiting for the life insurance agent to show up and she was suppose to be here at one and there has been no phone calls to explain the delay...maybe its traffic but right now I am glad to have everyone at home it makes me less on the downside and brings me on the upside still giving everything I am fighting for atm ..Peace n God Bless
(0)
Report

Ladee-clean for 28 years, now that is something to be proud of my friend!!!! And yes, you definitely need to find a new place away from the pot heads. Good Luck with finding a new place!!! How is sonny and marie these days?
Jam- how is col?
Vic-Maybe you should call hospice and at least see if they can give you a break and help your dad at the same time. hugs
Seemee-Puppies this weekend!!!!! So happy for you!!!! You will have to fill us in on all the details of them.
Starri-good to hear from our world traveler!!! I hope you are having fun seeing the world!!!
ASG-sorry your aunt is not doing good these days. Prayers for you and her!!!
River- hope you have a good day!!!
Notlike-I think i read that your mom and dad had a anniversary. Many congratulations to them and you!!!
Ok i can't remember anymore, forgive me if a forgot someone, but i hope all of ya'll have a great day.
Just checking in, nothing new here. Love and hugs stormyyyy
(0)
Report

: ( Sorry that you haven't heard from the grandbaby yet.. I know how much you are looking forward to her being there. That pretty brazen of the girl to come and offer you a joint. She had no way of knowing if you were under cover or not, I pray too that you get out of there soon, it served it's purpose for what you needed at the time, now it's time to move on.

I hope that everyone is having a wonderful day.. Big Hugs Carmen
(1)
Report

Great post River, and yes, we have to fight for our elders, in one form or another. I have many fears about where I am going to end up... no insurance, no savings, I'll be warehoused somewhere and forgotten about I'm sure..hope I die before then... freaks me out thinking about it...I have friends that would fight for me, but no family. Need to get off this subject, freaking myself out this morning...
Sure could use some prayers for getting out of where I am living.. neigbor came over last evening and asked if I wanted to smoke a joint!!!!. I am a recovering addict with 28 YEARS clean!!!! But must still have that 'look' about me sorry to say. I just stood there and looked at her until she got uncomfortable...finally told her to keep her craziness away from me...when I told her how many years I had clean her eyes bugged... told her I wouldn't call the cops, what she does is her business, but stay away from me with all that... Her comment, " yes ma'm"... Lord deliver me from this hell hole I live in and help me find a descent place to live...
Still haven't heard a word from my stupid son, so don't know if my grandangel is in town or not, sure could use some little girl hugs about now....
Ok, I've put it off long enough, need to get ready for work... check back in later. Everyone have a blessed day.... hugs.
(3)
Report

Hello Fellow Caregivers. Reading the posts tonight and it seems that most of all of you have had a fairly good day! That makes me smile. I have been busy with my own care giving duties. Yesterday was my parent's 49 or 50 wedding anniversary. No one really knows for sure. But the living center prepared a nice lunch for mom and dad and sat them together. My sister from CT came down to visit with me and together we went up the mountain to share in mom and dad's special day. Dad kissed mom and called her his beautiful wife. That is momunmental and touching as dad doesn't connect with the world very often. After the lunch I brought mom back home with me so she could spend time with her youngest daughter. Today we took her the Davidson River to a little place called Sycamore Flats for a few hours of walking in the sunshine, watching her great grand daughter 2 yr old Abbey wade in the water, and good conversation with her youngest child, my sister. When I look back I nearly cry when I think that these past two days might not have been. Last year at this time my mom was 90 pounds, paralyzed with contractures, incontintinent, bed bound, unable to feed herself or dress herself. I refused to let her die. The nsg home doc said there was nothing he could do. So, I did it. I got her the help she needed. Fought with anyone who stood in my way to get her the help she needed. And I am so glad because even if I don't know if it is their 49th or 50th year married, at least both of my parents are here to see the day. I did the same for my dad. Do you know that one hospital threatened to call the police and have me locked up for disturbing their ward after I found my dad strapped to his bed and hanging from restraints by his neck? I can't imagine what would have happened had I not shown up unexpectedly that night! Disturb their ward! I called the biggest brawniest friend I had to literally pick my dad up and haul him out of that hospital. No joke. I did! It's a strange world this caregiving place. You just never know what you will end up doing, going or being when it is all said and done. I think I am rambling. Please forgive. I try not to go back over these last horrific years. But seeing my mom walking and enjoying her family brings it all back. Never get old in America unless you have a caregiver willing to go to the mat for you. Or the pokey. Or hell and back again. Caregiving is not for sissies. As you all know first hand. Glad for the good day-yours and mine.
(5)
Report

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter