
Replacing the much lamented 'On My Mind' profile option, this thread is for musings, jottings, whimsies, preoccupations and the rest of the thesaurus for anyone to jot down anything they please.
I can't remember what the maximum character count was before, can anyone else? But anyway it wasn't very many so let's keep to that.
I’m sorry about you losing your energizer bunny aunt .
Thanks. I have tons of wonderful memories of my energizer cousin. My next visit to the cemetery I am going to bring flowers for her grave.
I can’t imagine living until 101. She didn’t look her age. She was a tiny little woman, dressed very stylishly, about weighed about 100 lbs, wore a size 4 dress and size 4 extra narrow shoes!
She spent a fortune on her shoes because they were hard to find. She had to special order them.
My husband’s great grandmother lived to be just shy of 102. Another tiny woman who had 12 kids and a couple of miscarriages.
She named all of her kids after her favorite characters in the books she read. I asked my husband when in the world did she have time to read with 12 kids? LOL 😆
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-australia-67870595
Thank you for posting the link on the brain tumor.
I have a just turned 70 yr old nephew in law, The picture of health, Biking fanatic who was diagnosed a year ago with a glioblastoma.
He has done amazingly well although he has had side effects from treatment. Three clear MRIs with no sign of another tumor and then in Nov. something shows up. They are aggressively treating with a new to him drug and more radiation.
I lost a first cousin to one a few years back. In her 60s. My DH lost his DFriend to one at 65.
So this IS exciting news to me.
Siddhartha Murkerjee called his mammoth and excellent treatise on cancer The Emperor of All Maladies. Well named.
There is a thread on the forum called, My “whine moment today.” What’s yours? You can whine about anything on it. Many of us post on there.
How about the term self absorbed , or self centered ? However , I don’t believe those terms include being controlling , manipulative , hurtful , rude , spoiled , entitled etc. This is why people use the terms that you don’t like if they are speaking about someone who has those traits . Often it is used to describe someone who has had those traits all along and sometimes it gets worse as they get older or have dementia .
I don’t know if that means she is a narcissist or just plain mean and nasty. It doesn’t matter to me what words are attached to describe her behavior. This is who she is.
You knew I would like it, didn't you?
I agree on Narcissist. If, as I told another poster moments ago, there is only 2-6% of the population who is Narcissistic, then we are definitely overusing that label on AC, or they are in fact ALL HERE.
I disagree somewhat about selfish. That isn't a clinical diagnosis under the DSM-5 (tho grieving too long and too much currently IS). I think it's OK to say "I think that's somewhat selfish, because......" But we aren't labeling someone as having a personality disorder.
Moreover my opinion of what makes you selfish and someone else's may vary. So it is a subjective, and not objective labeling of people. The person I say is selfish may spout right back "I am just trying to take care of myself!" and could well be right. We could agree at that point to disagree and get on with other niceities.
As RNs we were taught NEVER TO LABEL. If Jane just slapped Jennifer in the face we are not allow to say "Jennifer is becoming violent. We could only say "Jane slapped Jennifer" and what we did about it.
IF Irma said "I want my tray BEFORE you deliver to any other room because I want my food HOT and I don't care about anyone's else's food, but I better get MY WAY" we cannot say "Irma is a selfish, Narcissistic B----" in the chart. We have to say "Irma has expressed her wish to be fed first and says she isn't concerned about others who also want to eat; we have told her why we cannot deliver her tray first and explained tray delivery protocol."
Why? Because.. sigh.. the little kid inside me remembers the shameful feelings attached to it.
The word was an effective tool used to shape our behaviour.
Probably to stop us being whiny greedy brats wanting the largest slice of cake 😆 or serving ourself first. Oh the judgement that could land on Mother for having such selfish children!
As an adult, when this word gets used I have tried to stop & reflect why. Was it selfish?
It IS subjective. As already said, one person's view is selfish - the other view may be *self-care*.
What I have found is people can weaponise the word selfish - hurl it at someone in anger to control them.
Eg When a relative volunteered for care duties then attempted to roster others ("It's only fair - I'VE done all this so YOU all need to...") I saw the word as a weapon.
The words were: You are selfish for not helping me.
The meaning was: You are selfish for not doing what I want.
Who actually was being selfish?
I think I'll use *self-absorbed* too.
Makes me think of a bloated fish 😁
Consequently, I do use that word for anyone who crosses a boundary intentionally to coerce me to do what THEY want .
Will catch tons on throws and eat a piece of King Cake for y’all.
Wish you were here too!
Hail Rex! Our Rex King is an LSU Alumni. Our Queen is a Bama girl! Oh my gosh! Bama is our arch enemy! Oh well…We will love her for today as our ‘queen’ of carnival.
My favorite part of the parades are the marching bands. New Orleans is filled with fabulous musicians! I do love the artistry of the floats too.
Come for our Jazz and Heritage Festival. That’s my all time favorite! Fantastic lineup this year. Just got an email stating what musicians are playing. Going to be a wonderful time!
Have fun !! Beats shoveling snow like I did today .
I'm textbook C-PTSD neurologically dysregulated after a 40-minute conversation with my mom, where she told me she's moving my dad in with her after the hospital doc said he needed 24/7 care a week ago... and she partially blamed me, somehow, for issues in general because I'm not more present in her life. She wasn't giving me a guilt trip; she was saying things she always says about wishing we were closer, even while her behavior says she does exactly what she wants, and she knows she can call or visit me anytime.
I've removed many paragraphs of expounding on the vent that I just typed here because I got what I needed, which was to work through my feelings for a few minutes. 💜
I sure hope the dys thread comes back!
Send hugs!! 😆😱💜💜💜
*I'm in the middle of a weeks-long final school project... like, I'm frazzled anyway, but then this convo sent me. I'll be fine, but I'll take hugs and prayers, too!
It does seem that the dysfun thread has disappeared. We can always start a new one if doesn't come back.
gershun - glad to see you posting. Your childhood experiences are still very hard on you. I pray for healing for you. Getting through the childhood pain isn't easy! (((((hugs))))) for you too.