Countrymouse Posted November 2018
On My Mind
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Replacing the much lamented 'On My Mind' profile option, this thread is for musings, jottings, whimsies, preoccupations and the rest of the thesaurus for anyone to jot down anything they please.
I can't remember what the maximum character count was before, can anyone else? But anyway it wasn't very many so let's keep to that.
Cwillie, on the flip side, I finally understand why I needed such tall, fortified walls. I’m glad my brain installed a gate so I can screen who I let it. (my mother, 99, is getting meaner - another consult and attempt at meds)
way -it's great your mom was nicer to you at the end. I could say the same for the last day of my mum's life but not before.
psue - you will know when you get the report. You can decide you are OK as you are anytime you want to. It's not exercise that makes the biggest difference (maybe 20%) but what and how much you eat.
Ana - Sorry to hear your mom is getting more ornery. For me I erected a visual of a red brick wall with pink roses climbing up it.
Got my new humidifier yesterday and with a few blips setting it up it has been churning out steam since. The humidity hasn't dropped to 15 over night like before.
Psue - "they say" between 30% and 50% so I set the thing to 40%. it's going to take a few days to get there, as everything was so dry. Yesterday with the new one and two smaller ones going plus my stock pot on the stove I got it up to about 30%, but the hygrometer across the room from the big one says 23% this morning. The gauge on the machine reads 36% but that's close to the vents. However I am feeling that it's more moist. My sinuses feel better.
Now I'm not talking about "evil" people. Not sure how you would define that, but people with serious mental illness.
cw - pollyanna you????
nacy I can believe that you are a bit and not a bad thing either.
ana - you hit what gets me is these type of situations - it was preventable. Such a terrible waste. I hope the child had no suffering, but I know the family does - big time.
DH just said “Nice Try but No Cigar” when I asked if he knew where something was, and it all came back. It’s frightening to think that the deprived young people of today probably don’t even know what a Leisure Suit was!
However now we just found out that some cancerous cells were detected in the growth itself so she is now undergoing chemotherapy once a week for 3 months. I feel somewhat gutted. We had at least been relieved that she would not require chemotherapy or radiation. This will delay the reconstructive process. Her youngest child is 2 so she has barely been allowed to lift him. Her others are 11 and 9 so they do help.
I know it could be worse and is so for so many. I just have to come to terms with it. I thought I had initially but then today I just lost it and couldn't stop crying for awhile.
Anyway I wish all of you the healthiest holidays you are able to have.
Riverdale, I don't think there is anything worse than seeing our kids ill or in pain. Crying gives me relief too.
Thinking good thoughts and sending healing prayers for your daughter.
All will be well. Her zest for life will return. Her strength will too. It just takes time. Of course you’re going to cry for her; she’s your baby girl and this is devastating. But she can do this with your support; you raised her well.
I am so sorry. The big C is so much harder when you have young ones as does your daughter. But do let her know that I survived a mastectomy (had reconstruction at the time, always hated it and explanted it about 9 years ago) and chemo 38 years ago. There was cancer in two of my nodes at that time.
Cancer FREE for 38 after that. It's a year of hell, then a year of being scared every time you get headache (it's in my BRAIN) or shin splint (It's in my BONE) or anything else. Then a year of feeling pretty good, but even feel good is scaring you (Because if I let down the guard it will come BACK). It's crazy making time. I didn't get so sick as I did just get exhausted and depressed and had a taste of copper pennies in my mouth.
So last year you likely remember found a lump in October, lumpectomy in February and yup, I made another one at age 82. Cancer at 82 is LOTS easier. Sorry. That's the truth.
I don't know if daughter does Facebook but there's a support group there I absolutely LOVE and would give you name if you private message me if she's interested. Otherwise tell her this sucks. Tell her she gets to feel down on some days and that not being positive ever second doesn't KILL. I planned my whole FUNERAL and it didn't kill me 38 years ago. I was mean and depressed and scared and it didn't kill me. Let her think and feel whatever she wants to think and feel, because she's the warrior now, and she gets to think whatever the Hades she wants to.
My best to her and to you both.
And to all others here on Forum who are just DEALING right now.
For myself I am currently dealing with my own Grinch-i-ness. But that's my norm in the season and I will soon set right.
*I previously dropped a "thought bomb" comment here that came up in my neuropsychology class around Semantic Dementia; I will post about it another time when I have time to be more thoughtful -- I'm rushing like crazy for class and holiday prep. Semantic Dementia is very interesting to me, as I haven't previously heard of it.
I wish everyone a good holiday prep time! There's a lot to get lined up. :)
Alva, CW, River so sorry.
I am facing big unknown right now.
My husband is in hospital again.
Seems like lots of complications and pneumonia which is scary with Parkinson’s disease.
And they cannot get pain under control. Not eating, hardly able to talk.
@Ali: I don't know about WINNING. But the beast is at bay after the lumpectomy in February last. So far at least. First followup exam and mammograms looking good. So will keep our eyes out for it. I feel well and thanks. But I don't consider it a WIN. I know it's there. I try to convince it that it doesn't want to KILL the host, ha ha.
I worry about the fact that NeedsHelp hasn't returned to us and I now accept that can mean nothing good. I don't believe she would leave that long without any of us knowing she's just "on break".
I hope all enjoy the love of those in their lives in these holidays, however you do or do not celebrate them.
nacy - we are not sure what triggers the headaches. R says sunlight on snow (which is very bright) is one trigger, fatigue/lack of sleep and stress are likely others. He once broke his neck and we think that';s another factor.
Ali - I am so glad you are enjoying the neuropsych class. I know I would find it very interesting and complex.
I think my quietude will soon be overrun by young boys anxious to get changed and head to the water park.
Alva,
Pain started before, so intense by Saturday called 911.
It is his back, he feels like something is breaking, snapping, cannot move. If I google symptoms seems like spinal cord compression or worse. But I hope I am wrong.
To add to stress he is in ER as there are about 30 people waiting for hospital beds and all they do is trying to manage pain. Unsuccessfully so far. Never saw my husband so distressed he tolerated lots of pain.
If we are completely cognizant we can UNDERSTAND it, that it comes and it goes and is bad now, so lay down but will be better later. Usually lasts from a few days to a few weeks when acute, can go all the way down nerve into the foot.
Honestly not a lot to be DONE about it but say I hurt, move on best you can, and let it heal; it will be back. Not an old nurse out there without it I think. And with age we all get the compression.
I think pain can be terrifying when really bad, and the terror makes us clench everything together all the worse, unable to relax ourselves, and playing into it. I am hoping he gets some relief, but this may be a come and go on going thing now. The more he can understand that the more it can help him move through it.
Scan should kind of show how bad it looks, even xray often enough.
Why does it not surprise me that R once broke his neck - the man is a MACHINE!
I have found the right facility for my DH and we are in the midst of the intake process. It has been like a perfect piece of the puzzle falling into place at exactly the right time, just like so much of this last 2 years has been. The move; the house in the woods; the decline; the garbage truck incident; the “assault”; the vacancy in a beautiful facility 4.5 miles from our house; the support of DH’s family and mine in my decision to place him; and YOU, who may be the most perfect piece of all.
I know there are hard times coming very soon as our move-in date is before January 1 in order to take advantage of the considerable incentives. A short timetable, and all the emotional and financial mess looming on the horizon, has my nerves jangling. Getting through Christmas is going to be challenging. But I want to thank you all for your incredible support and advice; there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that I could not have done any of this without you.
psue - He doesn't have migraine symptoms. The hormone therapy for his prostate cancer causes headaches, and so does a severe concussion. No surprises there. He has seen a dr again and said the meds he prescribed before, which helped, have side effects. I asked what the dr suggested and R didn't answer I will ask again, He broke his neck bull riding when he was young. His dr says he is in great shape but his musculoskeletal system has been beaten up. That brings pain as you get older. Thankfully his knee op has solved that problem. He is in the pool having a blast cavorting with 2 grandsons so all is well right now. In many ways he is a machine. He is takin some anti-oxidants and anti-inflammatories I have given him (not NSAIDS).
You will see from a whine post I missed the boat. So so happy you have found the right placement for dh. Before Jan 1 - wow. That will be a scramble. Surely Christmas can be low key this year, but I also understand you will want to make it special for dh. He sounds like a man who is easily pleased by your efforts for him. ((((hugs)))) to you. Breathe deep. Take care of yourself. You are the Kingpin (Queenpin?) in all of this. Guilty - indeed not!