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Ventingisback,
Most spouses are unaware that when they are talking
no one is listening
so they are talking to themselves anyway.
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Venting, my husband always talks to himself, when his is in his garage. He even answers himself. 😂
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Haha, Sendhelp.
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I actually have a bad habit of humming, especially when nervous.
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Llama, that's not a bad habit, we all have are different things.

Im excited, got the car my son gave us, took it for a ride, wow I love it, now do we keep it or sell it. Don't really need 2 cars and 2 trucks for 2 people. But I really like this car, or do we sell it to pay for his wedding in Ireland??? 🤔🤔We can't decide. Honestly he just was sick of fixing things that started to break down on it. He thought it was the alternator this time, turned out , he left a light on inside the car. Lol.
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A neighbour dropped by this afternoon to see if R was in the help her with her front hall closet doors and to talk. I knew her husband was ill but it looks like he's pretty bad. In his condition he needs blood transfusions, but matching gets harder and harder. They are still looking but...And he has asbestosis.

Home care is coming in and other help.. He's not an old man - 60s at most. Hard to tell with her as she is a smoker and her skin is very wrinkled. She moves like a younger person.

Thankfully they have lots of support. She still goes out to play cards a couple of times a week. He has family nearby to visit and give her a break.

It's sad.
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Golden, that is so sad to see, and makes you realize how lucky we are. How's the barking dog situation going?

Peasuep, thinking of you. We are here for you.🫂🫂😔
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Daisy thx. That car sounds great. Maybe you and Dh should take a trip south in it. The barking dog now goes away for a while and then comes back. A little improvement.
Psue -thinking of you. Prayers🙏
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Golden, did you get your new dishwasher yet? What a pain that has been for you.
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Hi Daisy - it's on it's way. After a bit of checking around, I finally purchased one which arrives next week. I had a great saleslady that I feel will be behind me if anything goes wrong. I couldn't wait any longer without one that functions. It still is a pain trying to get some satisfaction over the other one, but whatever...
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Golden, I bet you can't wait! Glad your getting the dishwasher thing figured out!

I have a question for you, do you have a hard time getting your farmer type husband to slow down, not over work and hurt himself?
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Daisy - you are right, I can't wait. Re farmer's who over work. That's a hard one. most of them carry on till they drop. With his knee surgery and then especially the accident, R has had to slow down somewhat though he is picking up steam again as he heals from the concussion, He is slowly learning that he needs rest and to pace himself.

I look for opportunities, then encourage him to relax, take a nap , go to bed early (which was unheard of before)and so on. I plan breaks - going out to a performance, or a meal or just shopping. I tell him he is more important then the...whatever is calling him out to work. Now that there is more light, he feels he has to work till it's dark - hangover from the old days.

I think it is very hard for them to put themselves first. On the farm the animals, the machines, the chores and all come first even if you are sick, or tired. R is slowly learning to listen to his body and acknowledge that he is aging and can't do what he used to. It's a work in progress.
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Golden, yeah I told him for about a month, to slow down , finally got a bit loud about it 😂, but I should of gotten loud sooner, because the next day he could hardly walk. Knees, ankles and back. Knees, much better, backs better, ankles are still swelled. I keep telling him ice , I have CBD salve, not listening to me very well, maybe a little. He is staying of his feet more.

I also have a gf that I told and told not to date this guy ,many times over. now she is hiding out at a gf sister because he got abusive.

Man I wish people would listen to me! 😝

Thanks for that analogy of farmers mentality! 🥰 So true
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Farmers want to die with their boots on!
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Daisy - hope he learns something from this experience. Re treatment at home R does listen to me. He puts his own spin on things but is now taking some supplements that are helping his headaches from the concussion - ones I use for CFS/FM.

Also I encourage him to do something about it earlier rather than waiting tilI he is worse. I don't nag - but I do remind him at times. Most people have to learn from their own experience which can be frustrating to watch. Your hub no doubt has been brought up to put himself last and it takes a while to change that mindset.

I've seen R tired and with a headache, trying to deal with something here that is not in any way urgent. I tell him it's not that important and to take a rest, go to bed or whatever. Relax!!!!

cw - you are so right about that!!!
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Thanks Golden, I'm not a nagger either because it doesn't help anyways. I don't get mad, lol I get even 😈😁, the last day before his body gave out he came home, expecting dinner. I told him, I'm not cooking dinner until you stop killing yourself. He made himself tuna fish sandwiches that night, then the next morning his body gave out.

He thinks he can redo a 200 yr old house by himself and make money on it. It's got about 300 archers
It's more about the sentiment than anything. Some people keep sentimental coins, or jewelry, no he keeps farms, tractors, and trucks. Lol

Im hoping he learned something. I will try to encourage him that it's time to take better care of himself, like talking to a brick wall somedays. First I I'm encouraging him to drink these protein drink, OWYN . My x started drinking them and he feels a lot better.
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I get it, Daisy. I really do. R has all kinds of stuff including vehicles and equipment. Our basement storage area has lot of horse tack in it and one day it will have to go somewhere else. He finally took a saddle out of our den! That is one of my next big projects - getting some decent storage units for the den so things can be organized. I've done the not cooking dinner thing once or twice. Doesn't work very well. He just gets a meal together for himself. But it is a statement.

That old house is a huge project. I hope your hub feels better soon and realizes his limitations. I know it is very frustrating for you to see him pushing himself to the point of exhaustion. So far R bounces back. I know sometimes he takes time out here and there during the day. Other days it's 14 hours straight with hardly a meal or a break.
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Golden, thanks, nice to know I'm not the only one, that has one of these husbands, and I will say he keeps me in shape, when I feel like sitting to long , and he is outside doing his thing, I tell myself to Move!
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Being a farmer's wife has it's own set of challenges. After I first met R I looked it up on line and he was typical. Sounds like your DH is too. Absolutely R gets me moving more than I would on my own and I have some different and interesting experiences with him. He takes me to see the swans he saw on a pond, or out to the farm to see the animals etc. Not often but often enough. It enriches my life. Ya gotta look at the good stuff. 😊
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Thanks Golden, you are very right! Anyways, stepson is just getting over a cold, last night hubby started to come down with one. Honestly I'm not sweating it, because now he has to rest! He is also getting much dental work done in June, I'm thinking that will help him not catch things as easily.
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So happy today!
What a wonderful day!

Tried really hard to get to a doctor's appointment that I confirmed yesterday.
Arrived on-time.

The appointment is next month.
Once I was out, had a good time doing errands with dH, and got my hair cut impromptu, as a walk-in. Many chores completed.

Resting up now.

Golden,
I looked it up online about my husband, and he is atypical.
But we are making do, because I am not so normal either.
He lent me his arm to step-up or down on the curb, then
I was fine walking.
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Daisy -hope your hub is feeling better. Getting your teeth in order is a good thing.

send - Glad you had a good day. Many of us are (I think what they call nowadays) neurodivergent. Makes life interesting.
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I stopped in at the grocery store while on my daily walk and yikes! the prices are insane 🤯
I was going to buy some specialty ciabatta rolls from the 50% off bin but when I checked the regular price ($7.50) it was a hard NO, I'll bake some tea biscuits instead. And they've boosted the price of my regular brand of coffee to $21 per can, at those kinds of increased prices it will be worth it to take the trip to cheaper supermarkets for that alone.
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Golden, his colds good, didn't amount to much, his body, got sore again after he did his sons breaks, and other work on her his car, because he didn't give it enough time. 🤷

Moms did too much , cleaning the house for Easter, which didn't need at all. No one cares, and she was snippy because I didn't help much. I was there yesterday, she almost fell backwards, on cement, I grabbed her just in time. Honestly I'm just trying to keep that outta my mind. Nothing I can do no power, if I told my brother, he won't care mom will lie, so no point in me worrying, my pretty little head. 😂

A gf/neighbor has some major foot operation, I've been helping her. It's getting draining, her brother is come Wednesday. So I'm trying to keep my patients, other friends that were going to help, are no where to be seen.

So I've been have a blast. 😂
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I was not on forum for a while so catching up, guessing Daisy was Nacy.
Sounds so much better DrivingDaisy than anxietynacy.
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Yes Eva, phone got a virus and everything went kerplunk 😂, how are things with you? Golden and me have thought about you! 💕
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Thanks Daisy and Golden,
Things are not good.
My husband is not well. He is in such pain on higher and higher doses of morphine which don’t help or for very short time.
He was six times in hospital since late December and getting weaker.
Cannot get him to drink more, he eats less but still OK, drinks maybe 2 glasses of liquids which is not enough. Drinking so little is more dangerous than eating less.
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Eva I'm so sorry, this has to be so hard, I can't even imagine, what you are going through. 😓.
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Golden,
Yes, that's it, neurodivergent!

Thanks for that.
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(((Eva)))) - so sorry things are so bad for your hubby. I don't know what tp suggest for the drinking. I dilute electrolyte packets in my water which makes it pleasanter to drink..
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