
Replacing the much lamented 'On My Mind' profile option, this thread is for musings, jottings, whimsies, preoccupations and the rest of the thesaurus for anyone to jot down anything they please.
I can't remember what the maximum character count was before, can anyone else? But anyway it wasn't very many so let's keep to that.
glad - I know there are solutions - even air purifiers I believe.
technie -another good reason for me not to display a pumpkin. I had a bear garbage raider earlier this year.
My nephew's wife had 3 pumpkins on her porch... then they were gone. My ring video shows 2 yearling cubs walking across the property...
But it seems that more and more developers are focusing on the tablet and smart phone market, which IMO is making desktop navigation less intuitive. I tried for an hour to get some new desktop icons but there were so. many. steps. And in the end I just pinned the most used ones to the task bar instead. (Whatever happened to drag and drop?)
I think I've got the library working. I had to reauthorize adobe digital additions and I'll have to go back to downloading the books there before transferring to my e-reader... that's a bunch of extra steps that were eliminated with the cloud library app.
When the inspector placed the test I asked how often they come back positive at unacceptable levels. He said 2/3 of the time. Radon in the home I am selling, will find out about the new home today.
And in july, the state adopted new requirements for the testing and maintenance of the systems. Who knows if the test or system were in compliance.
Radon, glad??? In the home you are considering buying? That's not good.
Going to check out carpet samples tomorrow to replace maybe 15 year old carpet.
And I HATE the different emojis (does that look like a grimace to you?)
Baby steps as they say.
ETA
It took me a long time to understand and accept that.
I grapple with these feelings on an almost daily basis. It isn't just with my family either. My in-law's are impossible too. Everything is always on their terms. I learned this very early and avoid them.
All these many years, I just now realized....
It's Puss In Boots,
Not Puss and Boots!
The last time I invited my sister, she said "I will pencil you in".
Ha ha ha, the very last time, ever!
The best answer could be: "We've made other plans".
I think being less tolerant of toxic people is healthy, Setting boundaries with toxic people is healthy. Who on earth wants to go to dinner with people who put them down - again and again and again. Your sister who stays apart may be onto something. Maybe she doesn't enjoy those get togethers either and has established the necessary boundaries.
My mother wanted me and my sister to keep in touch. Well, it not happening. My sister is toxic to me and I have had enough of that for a lifetime.
Something I read recently in a devotional by Lysa Terkeurst.
"Love can be unconditional … but relational access never should be. And boundaries help us protect this. Boundaries help us keep ourselves together so we can be the people God has called us to be."
We need to set our relational access as appropriate to the behaviours of others. You don't have to go anywhere where you are made to feel uncomfortable. You have established that with your husband's family. You can set the same boundaries with your own family. There's nothing wrong with that. God says "Guard your heart".
Further quote by Lysa T
"We aren’t trying to protect ourselves FROM love. If we love, we will risk being hurt. But we are trying to protect ourselves FOR love. We don’t want to get so consumed with the pain and chaos of unhealthy relationship patterns that we become a carrier of human hurt rather than a conduit of God’s love."
How about my sister's fav tactic *the stall* : That date looks good at the moment - I'll let you know if anything de-rails us.
A 'soft' commitment while you file it under *later* for a week or two. Give yourself time for your boundaries to message you.
🙃
The older I get the less easy it is for me to handle toxic people. So maybe people aren't getting worse, I'm just less tolerant. So I suppose that's on me.
She decided one year to book a cheap package holiday. Cheap because while it was a lovely tropical place at other times, December had awful humidity & hardly any tourists or activities - but she enjoyed her alone time (safe from family & ex-family). The next year her adult kid wanted to come & a new tradition was born.
Send, clean-up at our events now come with risk of incontinence care clean-ups.
I am also weighing things up - if the past fond memories + FOG outweigh the known + potential problems.
What scenario would be the least worst.. 🤯
Oh, and the copious amount of alcohol that my family consumes. Probably the only way we tolerate each other. I personally nurse a glass of wine all night. And that brings up another thing with my family. The "let's get (fill in name) drunk." I've never understood the appeal of deliberating trying to get someone drunk. Not to mention letting said person get behind the wheel of a car after you've "gotten them drunk" Another form of ridiculing someone. My family has always enjoyed that.
I try to give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they've changed. But I'm still waiting. Hasn't happened yet. Maybe this year?
She has fallen many times, and was hospitalized recently for possible heat stroke. But she's made up her mind, she's not budging. She is mentally sharp as a tack so she gets the call the shot till the end.
This whole thing reminds me of a former forum member Elaine and her mom and how the mom met her end. Like my elderly friend, she also refused to leave her hoard packed home and ended up falling and not be discovered for days, then died in the hospital days later. I know my elderly friend knows this risk and she chooses it by staying in her home. As much as I worry for her, I will respect her choice.
My attitude and mood has changed, and you will never find me sitting at a table with everyone's face in their cell phones.
I think it's me, not everyone else.
I welcome the loneliness, after working out the alternatives in my head.
I don't need to be exposed to the tension in the room anymore.
And I sure cannot help clean-up after.
And I'm more than willing to host family events but since I live a little off the beaten track my efforts have been met as if I live in Siberia... I'm just the old auntie after all and when the kids need to travel to visit family they are heading to their parents, not me.