
Replacing the much lamented 'On My Mind' profile option, this thread is for musings, jottings, whimsies, preoccupations and the rest of the thesaurus for anyone to jot down anything they please.
I can't remember what the maximum character count was before, can anyone else? But anyway it wasn't very many so let's keep to that.
I'm thinking about moving to part time school for my last year in the BS program. That would give me more time to sort out how to do entry level/internship requirements for some of the positions I'm eyeing for the future... and covid is still a factor for consideration, limiting some things.
Everything is good enough. I can't complain. But I'm tired, and achy, and it's just wearing on me. Thanks for giving me a place to put this down. "Ain't no use in complaining when you got a job to do." Canadian Bryan Adams... I thought he was cute when I was in high school, all over MTV with his rugged good looks.
I have about 3 more pressing days of school to finish out work for this term. I'm beat. Somehow, it will get done.
Guess I won't go for a walk.
I too am a night-time-ruminator.. sigh. I read somewhere that the memory & thought brain cells are still active but the problem-solving cells have switched into downtime. A-ha! So round & round the thoughts go.
I
Iacknowledge them (oh you again) then say see you later (sod off) & try some menial mental task to distract ie saying the alphabet backwards. Picturing a 10 move yoga practice is my current fav.
I chucked the HRT recently too & slipped into a grey place (v similar to going off the pill when younger). But not a black place. It's manageable.
I keep reminding myself if it cannot be cured (feeling grey) then contain. To add extra kindness for myself.
RIP furry Daniel.
Gershun, sending some kind thoughts your way 🤗
I've just been thinking about things a lot lately. Is there anyone else out there who thinks too much like me. Who lays in bed at night ruminating about things that happened a long time ago? I hope I'm not the only one.
I relive my care giving days with my mom and second guess stuff. Why I continue to torture myself God only knows. Maybe I need a new hobby?
I have been struggling a lot lately with depression. Partly cause I'm weaning myself off of hormone replacement I suspect. My gyno suggested that sixty should be the cut off point for that and as I'm turning sixty in a little over a month that's what I've been doing. I'm really worried that I'll go into a full blown funk when I'm off of them completely and I really don't want to go down the antidepressant road again. Been there, done that, have the t-shirt. I understand they are very helpful for some people so I'm not suggesting they are bad. Just not good for me.
I've really been missing my cat Daniel who we had to get put down in August too. I took his passing really hard. We still have his brother but he's sad too. I won't get another one now though. I think it would be unfair to him. Maybe one day but not now.
So, that's what's on my mind today. Thx for reading. :)
Of course, I looked it up.
The newspaper now says a girl in her twenties.
I am fighting to hold my tears back.
(((((hugs)))))