
Replacing the much lamented 'On My Mind' profile option, this thread is for musings, jottings, whimsies, preoccupations and the rest of the thesaurus for anyone to jot down anything they please.
I can't remember what the maximum character count was before, can anyone else? But anyway it wasn't very many so let's keep to that.
I was shopping yesterday and there was an Aretha Franklin Christmas carol playing. I said out loud to myself. Shut the blank up! I think I probably just need to paint myself green this year and call myself Grinch. No one would argue. I can be a real downer during this joyous season.
Stopping by for fifteen to twenty minutes and delivering his groceries would be absolutely FINE. The man's got terminal cancer, and he's having chemo: short-and-sweet is exactly the kind of visit that will do him most good.
You don't need to tell him anything about your schedule, true or otherwise. But to make you feel more comfortable you could deliberately pick a morning when you genuinely do need or want to be somewhere else. E.g. drop in his groceries at eleven when you're having your hair done at twelve. That kind of thing.
Bear in mind that you're much more likely to give him reliable, consistent support if you don't hate doing it!
Just breath! I think sometimes we make a situation bigger and more complex in our head then it has to be. I do this myself! Lol! Just send your cousin an e-mail stating that you yourself have gone through some health issues and that you are still recovering. But that you wouldn't mind running some errands for him when you do your own; however you really are not up to socializing. Basically I am agreeing with Gershun and NHWM. There is no need for you to feel like a heel or beat yourself up over this. We all have our limits to what we can or will do.
We all do these things to some degree...we want to help, but we don't want to get to involve. So, we as humans arrange things to fit what we are comfortable in doing!
Personally, I think you should go and just do a 20 to 30 minute visit. I think it would be good for you, but that is just me:/
I am glad that you a getting better. And remember to just breath...it will work out!
I agree with asking your sister. She might surprise you and be willing to come along, especially if she knows his situation.
I don’t think you are lying though. You are prioritizing your time to care for you. That care can be emotional or physical care. See what I mean?
You know that you had a serious situation. I’m thrilled you are recovering better than you expected but you have to admit that it was a serious medical concern that you had to address.
Good idea to ask your sister. She may say no but it can’t hurt to ask.
I suppose you could shoot him an email back and say exactly what Gershun has said, explain that you are recovering from your own health issues and unfortunately don’t have much free time. Does that sound reasonable to you? I would understand if I received a message like that.
You can say that you will gladly run a couple of errands now and then.
When I was on complete bedrest my neighbor offered to do grocery shopping for me when she went to do her shopping. This woman had three young children, taught piano lessons, and so on. She was a busy woman so it threw me that she had the spare time to do a favor for me.
I graciously accepted her offer. When she delivered the groceries she wanted to put them away for me. Again I was surprised. I told her that I truly appreciated it but asked her to only place the cold things in fridge and to leave the rest because I knew that she was a busy woman. She smiled and said she would put the cold items in the fridge and then be on her way.
People don’t mind helping when others don’t take advantage. When my oldest daughter got home from school she put the remaining few groceries away.
Then she would pile up her school books and do her homework by my side. We would play board games in the bed or read books. I always felt badly for her that I had to remain in bed due to a high risk pregnancy but she talks about how fun it was to play board games on a big king sized bed.
Kids are so funny. So cute and sweet. They remember the time we spent with them. Precious memories.
I know I'm over thinking this. Fact is I've become something of a recluse since mom is gone and I know that's not a good thing.
Compromise: take him some fresh fruit, stop for a cup of coffee, and see how it goes.
Also, he couldn't very well reply to your kindness by sending you a list and not inviting you in, could he; so you should be okay just sticking to what you had in mind, more or less. "Try anything once except incest and Morris dancing," they say. How bad can it be? - and if it's worse (!) you won't have to do it again.
Any advice?
I know I can’t be the only one who has noticed but there seem to be a few people who get bored (I assume) and start reading old posts and responding to them! I’ve seen a few people reply multiple to posts that had been stagnant for months....I assume they were bored or something! I dislike it because it pushes new posts further down the newsfeed or on to the next page & makes it harder for them to be seen.
That’s true too. Some posts aren’t current and they continue to have replies.
IMO AgingCare needs to be a little bit quicker at closing inactive threads or those the OP has abandoned while still enabling the OP to post an update (long conversational threads excepted) - I have seen this on other forums so it isn't impossible.
Duly noted. Yes. we read Abby and Ann Landers. Also Heloise. Remember her? She had great tips for everyone.
Why do we get so upset when original posters don't return? Some people even label them trolls! I find most of what I read here to be helpful, even if/when it's a bit harsh; regardless of whether the original poster comes back to re-engage.
Maybe it's because I am of the Dear Abby generation. I loved reading her column and we never got to hear back from the OP in that instance.
I guess I just think pointing it out doesn't invalidate what's been provided, nor does it mean the user is a troll!
The best dentist I ever saw, twenty years ago, recommended a piece of 7-grain bread to help me get to sleep, and stay asleep longer.
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I think that I should keep one ear open, to see if I snore.
Sorry the Viking is sad. Maybe those special bears you buy for people will cheer her up. I am so glad she has you. She wouldn't be fed otherwise.
I sure hope things get better at that place. 💞💞💞💞💞
tucked the Viking in tonight and asked her what she wanted for Xmas - she said she didn't care about anything -
I guess not 😥
Going to bed now.
Is it just me or has this been a real witch of a year? Some blessings, of course, but, lots of heartache too. My dad took a downward turn and just returned home from rehab, I lost one of my best friends in the spring at age 59 and today, I just got a call from another good friend who's in surgical ICU. He's spinal cord surgery bound in a couple of days. He's almost 81 years old and I'm feeling pretty nervous. It makes me wonder what is going on?
I am just putting them in the TRASH where they belong!
LOL.
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