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To go back to Mom and her UTI situation and beyond that, she has treatment and has got that cleared up but it left a wake of new mental problems.I am getting some help with in home health and OT and PT.Naturally she doesn't think she needs it. I am her be all and I can't take it anymore.The social worker has put me in touch with caregiver support but without a diagnosis for her for dementia I don't qualify. She has an appt with a Neurologist next week.The one caregiver support person I spoke with has me scheduled for her visit in my home in July. I'm grateful for all the listeners and in home 'care' she gets but I realize they want me to 'learn' how to manage all of this.I guess what I'm trying to say is, I've managed to burn myself out way more than is healthy. I'm in the process of finding a therapist for me today and will try to go talk to someone and hope that is will stick.I don't have a lot of hope and that's where I am.Getting her placed somewhere isn't an option at this point. I'm in a constant state of waiting for the other shoe to fall. Shoes. lol but not funny.So, now I have more people who are aware of her and my situation. Family that has disappeared when things are getting worse but help each other and that's their choice. So, I don't communicate with her sisters or any of them anymore.I have stayed overnight with her a couple of time over the holiday weekend, but I went back to her house Easter Sunday evening she was on the floor beside her bed. I called for assist and the EMS came over and of course she was alert and didn't want to go to the hospital so he got her back in bed and I stayed. Her reasoning for this incident not a FALL but she sat herself on the floor to see if she could get back up. I just happened to go back to her house and found her. Good ol' intuition I guess.

Read your update. If she fell and hit her head and there was blood, they'll check her for a concussion and a potential stroke or heart attack. If there is no major condition, or she isn't bleeding from a major wound to the head, they might indeed release her right away. You should call them to say there is no one in her home to help her and she is an unsafe discharge. I know you told the aunt to do that, but you might want to do that as well. If not, they may send her home in a taxi. If that does happen, you'll be back to shoe waiting, as hard as that is.
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I spoke to her this morning and she sounded somewhat off but was eating and called me back. I hadn't planned on going back over. Couple of hours later she called and I didn't answer. Another hr later her sister called and asked had I talked to my Mama and yes I had, well she's in the hospital because she fell and hit her head and had hurt her wrist. Hmmm. I told my Aunt I can't bring her back home and stay with her.
Called my Mom and she was in the ER and didn't mention her wrist only that she hit her head and there was blood and they probably won't keep her. I said Mom you are going to need to go to rehab somewhere and she got angry and said good bye.
Auntie calls me back to tell me that they are discharging her and I need to go get her. I said no. and hung up.
She calls to tell me she is going to pick her up and take her home. Which home? Back to Mom's house. I said she can't stay by herself and if you do that it is and unsafe discharge if the hospital does that. I hadn't heard from the hospital at this point. Tells me I need to call the hospital and tell them to keep her. I told her to call them to say that. I hung up.
My Mom called and I didn't answer so it has been a few hours and nothing but silence.
Am I being played or what? I'm at my mental compacity for what I can do for her and I'm not going to be manipulated anymore.
If she hit her head and there was blood would they actually discharge her that fast?
I believe she is dehydrated hence the hallucinations. But she does some things that she wants to do and has me do the clean ups. This back and forth is taking its toll. I had to say no.
If she called the sister when I didn't answer I don't know who called EMS. Someone is not telling me the real story.
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What happened? Share more if you like.
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The other shoe has fallen.
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Snoopylove,I'm looking into a therapist for me. Thank you for the the support.

Slart, I think I'm at that point. I don't have to go beyond the basics.
The EMS guy mentioned something about APS. If that happens so be it.
I've been protecting her so called independence for years.
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Your health is important! If it goes, what will you do then?
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"Getting her placed somewhere isn't an option at this point." That may be true but that does not mean you have to uproot your entire life to enable her to keep making bad decisions. I hope she will get a clear diagnosis at the neurologist next week.

Does she own her house? Because if she does or otherwise has money to pay for memory care you very much could get her placed in a memory care. You'd have to have financial as well as medical POA, she'd have to have a diagnosis of Alzheimer's or Dementia, and you would have to have her evaluated and determined to be not competent to say no.

If you don't meet all these criteria yet, you could in the future. Or she may in fact be competent and be choosing to make awful decisions. Again, that doesn't mean you have to enable her by blowing up your own life. Sometimes we honor our parents by honoring their right to make the worst decisions.
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