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An older family member is spending money wildly online. Is there a software made to protect them from such sites like there are for children.?
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I can't believe that NAMI would post this quote. It says nothing we don't already know and gives us no hope for it to ever take place.

"It’s good to be a shoulder, cheerleader, friend, or support system; but remember, you deserve as good as you give.” Liz Faulblas

We know this, but who gets it and from where?
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🙂
"Make room for the right people to enter your life by clearing out those who don't belong."
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...if you're from a dysfunctional family, you probably haven't heard a real thanks in a while, if ever. so for all us caregivers here on the forum, i'll say it loud and clear:

THANK YOU for being your amazing self!
🙂🙂🙂🍀🍀🍀🐾🐾🐾
🐶🐶🐶
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I see this in myself as I have seen it also in others. I have seen that being the caretaker of one's spouse changes the dynamics of the relationship. It is further adjusted when you as the caregiver are diagnosed with a neurological disorder like narcolespsy which is curable and takes time to get someone rightly medicated plus waiting months to see a qualified specialist to begin the journey.

I am having to wait until June. My SIL, my wife and I are looking for a place in Greensboro, NC for the three of us to move to for continuing care, i.e. independent living, assisted living, and nursing home at some point.

Out of necessity, Sis, as I call her, and I are taking on the majority of this task. She has already had some interaction with Moses Cone hospital there and as a cancer survivor needs such a place. During our chat, I did a quick search for neurologists who specialize in narcolepsy. Wow! They have 4 whereas Duke only has 1 or 2. I am calling that place in the morning to see if my PC can refer me to a doctor there and they can see me sooner. Two years ago, Duke Hospital and Moses Cone Hospital were ranked equally.
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Hi,

Correction.

I meant to say that Narcolepsy is not curable. It is only treatable.

My sons and sis are concerned about this and she watches me like an eagle. Thus, her new nickname, eagle eye. My wife, however, is used to seeing me and sis as the strong ones. Thus, she doesn't see what the rest of us see in myself or in sis. Sis is a stage 4 ovarian cancer survivor from back in 2000 with complications related to her treatment. We are no longer the mighty warriors that we once were. We are the same team that we became over several decades. We are prepared and rather certain that at some point, we are together going to just have to take charge for everyone's benefit and our own survival. This reciprocal platonic relationship is a great blessing. It is by far the deepest platonic relationship that I've ever experienced, but that out of necessity. We have been the mental health jedi of the family and each of us feel like going to an island far far away like Luke Skywalker did. We are not depressed like he was. We are tired. She tries to make my life easier as much as she can and I do the same. Recently, things developed such that she's invited me to the empty duplex next to her when I feel a need to escape.

Thanks for listening to this cranky old man. My psych says that I have earned the right to be a cranky old man at this point. Maybe so.
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Changing from my usual topics, I have some questions.

We and my wife's sister have a financial investment person. We have our finances in order as retired people. Do we need some other kind of financial person to help us organize to move into a continuous care place?

The only thing that sis and I need to do is set up our residences to sell.

We are not ready to move yet, but many of the people at these continuous care places sound like vultures. They want a decision today when I am just doing research. As I explained to one person, they want me to defend a doctoral dissertation before I have even prepared the proposal and had it approved.
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Notry etc, You are talking to salespeople, they are putting some effort into you, and yes they want the sale agreed ASAP, even if it’s for the future. Perhaps you could be quite precise about what you want to know, so that they don’t spend 2 hours talking fluff around the important points. That would be a kindness to them, to match you feeling fine about wasting their time.
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i've said it before, but just want to say it again:

🙂 i'm stuck between a rock
and someone i want to hit it with.
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🙂 I love long walks away
from everyone.
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🙂 i tried to drown my sorrows, but the bastards learned how to swim...
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My family was dysfunctional as he!!. My older sister was horrible to me and the golden child of the family. My parents took turns being immature jerks and threw all their responsibilities on me including my disabled sister. My older brother was the only one who cared about me even though he was fighting his own demons. He passed away this past February from cancer. I have another brother, but we are not close. Even though most of them are dead now, the trouble makers are still around.

I still have nightmares about them from time to time. My fibromyalgia is flaring up due to the damp weather here in DC.

Al-Anon was my saving grace, and all of the long time members have passed on and just a few of us from our old groups are still around.
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🙄 Have you ever just sat and thought…
I’ve been through a lot of stuff…
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🤷‍♀️ I feel like I’m in season 5 of my life and the writers are just making ridiculous stuff happen to keep it interesting.
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🤮 I try to wear my angel wings every day.
But sometimes I’d like to take them off and beat somebody with them.
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Closing on my parents house is next week. Can’t wait to close the book on this situation. Still have dad in NH but at least the estate is done because it was all in my mothers name. Medicaid will take its due and I won’t need to have my siblings in my life anymore. It’s sad to write something as miserable as this but as my mother would famously say “It is what it is. “
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Hothouse - that's great. So happy for you. I felt such a burden lifted when the estate business was over and I could cut contact with my sis. Never felt so safe in my life!!! It was wonderful.

scampie (((((hugs))))

bundle - good ones
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I am asking this for a friend.

Can someone be thrown out of assisted living if they constantly live in clutter which they keep increasing?
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I saw a store that has a sign that reads
"We treat you like family!"

Yup,
NOT going in there.
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😇😇😇
Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is
understanding the other person is a complete idiot.
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Monsters are real
and they look like people...
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🙂 🙂 
Anything that costs you your peace
is too expensive.
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Anxietynacy,

I suspect so also. I will tell them.
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bundleofjoy,

I have shared two of your jokes on a childhood trauma page because they can appreciate them as well.

I shared,

"I saw a store that has a sign that reads
"We treat you like family!"

Yup,
NOT going in there."

and

"Monsters are real
and they look like people...
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toxic/dysfunctional people:

“Fine, we’ll compromise.
I’ll get my way & you’ll find a way to be OK with that.”
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Anxietynacy,

I couldn't press click due to the subject. I am very sorry that you are having to learn about that subject. If you talk with those who work in that area, they will tell you that the statistics are way off. A good book on this subject without having to go into as much detail as it sounds you have heard is The Body Keeps Score.

To keep from getting on a roll with this subject, I'll close with this. Such is worse in a single-parent situation, particularly with an only child of the opposite sex. If I say anymore, it will become mount everast.

Goodbye, I have to call a guardianship lawyer concerning my wife who has suddenly gotten into what I think is manic spending beyond reason which her sister saw evidence of last week and I've shared with her therapist who she sees tomorrow. I've tried talking with her about this as has her sister, but no luck. It is a very sad day, but why people set up medical and durable POAs. Sufficient to say, but the credit card debt is about to exceed $9,000 which it will take her inheritance money to pay for which means less money for staying in a continuing care place which her sister and us will soon be looking over. This is a sad day.
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One symptom of narcolepsy is insomnia.

I wear my smartwatch almost every night. I added up the nights on 
which I slept for 6 hours or more from Jan 1 until yesterday. The 
results were that I only slept an average of 6.85 hours on 29 of 
those days which I slept for at least 6 hours over the past almost 9 months. 

I'm sending this to my neurologist, my PC who I see tomorrow and maybe my
endocrinologist.
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today’s words of wisdom
(i gotta apply that to myself, too)

🥰 “If you want to fly, give up everything that weighs you down.”
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…Sometimes “gosh darn” and “meanie head” just don’t cut it.
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When you leave the “wrong people” behind, the right things start happening.
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