
Many of us, myself included, come from a dysfunctional family which adds a lot of weight to the challenges of caregiving. I have read stores on various threads on other topics and decided it would be good to have a thread just for this topic for people to share, vent and discuss.
The idea for this thread originated on the thread named "The Caregiver....How are YOU doing today?"
"It’s good to be a shoulder, cheerleader, friend, or support system; but remember, you deserve as good as you give.” Liz Faulblas
We know this, but who gets it and from where?
"Make room for the right people to enter your life by clearing out those who don't belong."
THANK YOU for being your amazing self!
🙂🙂🙂🍀🍀🍀🐾🐾🐾
🐶🐶🐶
I am having to wait until June. My SIL, my wife and I are looking for a place in Greensboro, NC for the three of us to move to for continuing care, i.e. independent living, assisted living, and nursing home at some point.
Out of necessity, Sis, as I call her, and I are taking on the majority of this task. She has already had some interaction with Moses Cone hospital there and as a cancer survivor needs such a place. During our chat, I did a quick search for neurologists who specialize in narcolepsy. Wow! They have 4 whereas Duke only has 1 or 2. I am calling that place in the morning to see if my PC can refer me to a doctor there and they can see me sooner. Two years ago, Duke Hospital and Moses Cone Hospital were ranked equally.
Correction.
I meant to say that Narcolepsy is not curable. It is only treatable.
My sons and sis are concerned about this and she watches me like an eagle. Thus, her new nickname, eagle eye. My wife, however, is used to seeing me and sis as the strong ones. Thus, she doesn't see what the rest of us see in myself or in sis. Sis is a stage 4 ovarian cancer survivor from back in 2000 with complications related to her treatment. We are no longer the mighty warriors that we once were. We are the same team that we became over several decades. We are prepared and rather certain that at some point, we are together going to just have to take charge for everyone's benefit and our own survival. This reciprocal platonic relationship is a great blessing. It is by far the deepest platonic relationship that I've ever experienced, but that out of necessity. We have been the mental health jedi of the family and each of us feel like going to an island far far away like Luke Skywalker did. We are not depressed like he was. We are tired. She tries to make my life easier as much as she can and I do the same. Recently, things developed such that she's invited me to the empty duplex next to her when I feel a need to escape.
Thanks for listening to this cranky old man. My psych says that I have earned the right to be a cranky old man at this point. Maybe so.
We and my wife's sister have a financial investment person. We have our finances in order as retired people. Do we need some other kind of financial person to help us organize to move into a continuous care place?
The only thing that sis and I need to do is set up our residences to sell.
We are not ready to move yet, but many of the people at these continuous care places sound like vultures. They want a decision today when I am just doing research. As I explained to one person, they want me to defend a doctoral dissertation before I have even prepared the proposal and had it approved.
🙂 i'm stuck between a rock
and someone i want to hit it with.
from everyone.
I still have nightmares about them from time to time. My fibromyalgia is flaring up due to the damp weather here in DC.
Al-Anon was my saving grace, and all of the long time members have passed on and just a few of us from our old groups are still around.
I’ve been through a lot of stuff…
But sometimes I’d like to take them off and beat somebody with them.
scampie (((((hugs))))
bundle - good ones
Can someone be thrown out of assisted living if they constantly live in clutter which they keep increasing?
"We treat you like family!"
Yup,
NOT going in there.
Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is
understanding the other person is a complete idiot.
and they look like people...
Anything that costs you your peace
is too expensive.
I suspect so also. I will tell them.
I have shared two of your jokes on a childhood trauma page because they can appreciate them as well.
I shared,
"I saw a store that has a sign that reads
"We treat you like family!"
Yup,
NOT going in there."
and
"Monsters are real
and they look like people...
“Fine, we’ll compromise.
I’ll get my way & you’ll find a way to be OK with that.”
I couldn't press click due to the subject. I am very sorry that you are having to learn about that subject. If you talk with those who work in that area, they will tell you that the statistics are way off. A good book on this subject without having to go into as much detail as it sounds you have heard is The Body Keeps Score.
To keep from getting on a roll with this subject, I'll close with this. Such is worse in a single-parent situation, particularly with an only child of the opposite sex. If I say anymore, it will become mount everast.
Goodbye, I have to call a guardianship lawyer concerning my wife who has suddenly gotten into what I think is manic spending beyond reason which her sister saw evidence of last week and I've shared with her therapist who she sees tomorrow. I've tried talking with her about this as has her sister, but no luck. It is a very sad day, but why people set up medical and durable POAs. Sufficient to say, but the credit card debt is about to exceed $9,000 which it will take her inheritance money to pay for which means less money for staying in a continuing care place which her sister and us will soon be looking over. This is a sad day.
I wear my smartwatch almost every night. I added up the nights on
which I slept for 6 hours or more from Jan 1 until yesterday. The
results were that I only slept an average of 6.85 hours on 29 of
those days which I slept for at least 6 hours over the past almost 9 months.
I'm sending this to my neurologist, my PC who I see tomorrow and maybe my
endocrinologist.
(i gotta apply that to myself, too)
🥰 “If you want to fly, give up everything that weighs you down.”