notrydoyoda Posted January 2012
The Caregiver & Dysfunctional Families: How are you doing?
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I laughed when I read that you burn the candles at both ends.
I guess we all do this from time to time. But just be aware.....that we need to take some measures to circumvent some of this kind of exhaustive energy.
Burning sage actually is a very old tradition in many cultures. Catholics burn incense in the church during ceremonies. But in this case it is Frankincense.
The Native Americans, as well as other tribal people will burn sage as a way of cleansing the bad energies, and cleansing. It is even known to purify, germ wise a room full of germs, like when someone has been sick. I even would rather burn this in my bathroom, instead of using those horrible aerosol sprays loaded with chemicals. At least the former is natural. I burn it when I'm feeling depressed, or I'm having a bout of thinking negatively. It has a calming effect. But you really can do this type of practice with your incense of choice. There are many beautiful scents out there, and if you look them up you'll find e.g., lavender is a great calmer. Lemon, lemon verbena and any citrus smell can lift the spirit.
I'm going to do just that this morning, because I need it.
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
Happy New Years to all and hope the holidays were as sane as could be and found some nice moments to enjoy.
I took a cyber break when we took down Inet to work on office room and kept it going thru the holiday.
Hope you all are well and staying warm. We are making good progress here and should have floors complete with insulation in a few days and get some decent heat going here soon.
XOXOX to all, hang in there!
Peace,
Juju!
`
I must finally be getting back to my pre-holiday light heartedness. Thank goodness! I was an extremely stressful month!
The Supermoon means that the moon occurs at or near (90%) it's closest approach to Earth, as it orbits our planet.
You have probably heard how the Full Moon is a powerful time in terms of how people are affected by the gravitational pull, which does affect people's moods.
Many people believe in using these energies which occur, especially during a New Moon, which is a time when people put out their intentions regarding different aspects of their lives so they can move forward, in other words evolve. Being that this occurred simultaneously, Jan 1st being the first day of a New Year, and the New Moon phase explains why this is a very powerful time. There's more to this too, since it depends which planets are around when all this is happening.
Hope this explains it generally speaking.
Much Love & LIght! Margeaux
How great you meeting this Dr. Oh yes! I have been a follower of Traditional Chinese Medicine for some time. It just doesn't cease to amaze me. I was bammed out the other day, when I thought I'd have time to run through China Town, to buy some of my teas I like to have on hand, but couldn't because I left too late on my ways to mother's house on New Year's Eve. Oh well, I'll have to make a special trip.
The scents are so wonderful. I really need to buy an atomizer, and some other scents know to help certain conditions.
So happy to hear that your New Year's Eve was peaceful.
Hugs,
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
Joan~It will be painful for you going south right after your friend's passing. I do hope you can go to a service during your time there. [[[[Hugs]]]]]!!
I rarely ask for days off work, accept my schedule as assigned each week. I have decided that I am going to request more consecutive days off a couple times a month. It won't effect the hours I am given. My goal is to have 2-3 days consecutively so I can get more done at home and more opportunities to go out to take photos. If I had the right lens, I would have gone out to get photos of the super moon.
Have a good weekend everyone, enjoy what quiet time you can get and let the agitators in your lives spin on a heavy cycle by themselves.
It really did scare me lend of last week when I was informed by my sister that mother had been so sick, not holding anything down in her system. She ended up at Urgent Care last Thursday with her. But she's improved as of the New Year.
I knew my sister felt very stressed out with the holidays, then she too had her boyfriend to deal with, who recently had eye surgery since his retina detached, and he's been recovering from that ordeal. Anyway, I went over there so she could have the night off,. She went to the beau's, and she hung out w/him on an overnighter.
Meanwhile, I'm now at mom's with her on the couch in the living room. They must have about 5 tv's, in that household, I can't believe this! So who knows which remote I picked up, and I pressed probably the wrong buttons, because now I didn't have a signal. This was 8:00 p.m., and I was just trying to find something cheery New Years, for mom and me to watch. Now I told mom, we'd have to go into her bedroom, which we did. Well, we go in there and it's pretty much a bed, and an armchair. So as I was searching the channels on a tv in there, mom fell asleep. I found a great show to watch which was about Native dance, of the Pacific Rim. It had nothing to do with New Year's, but was great!!!!!
Talk about energies! So the mother's bedroom, she and her narcissist sister used to share it, while my aunt was alive. She died in that room. So I still get the heebee geebees, whenever I sleep in that room! I don't share this feeling much with my sister either, because she probably thinks I'm nuts for thinking like this. But I can never sleep when I go into that household. So when I came back home, I felt very exhausted. So I showered, made us a nice pasta, and hit the bed.
What a difference a day makes........24 little hours!
Got the Moon and the flowers, la, da, da, la, dada!
Much Love & LIght! Margeaux
I'm really happy to hear that you're feeling lighter about things.
You definitely went through more than most people can handle, but handle it you did!
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
Have you ever watched a program on cable "America Unearthed?" It is about a man who is a forensic geologist. The program is about how here in America we have many ancient artifacts that prove the existence of ancient man being here before Columbus. We all know that Columbus did not discover American but we were all taught in school he was the first to come here. It is an interesting program if you like this sort of subject. Many of the sites he has researched go back to pagan times regarding the summer and winter solstice. I admit that I have a hard time accepting the whole Knights Templar theory regarding Jesus being married to Mary Magdalene and having a child, but I do enjoy the geology aspect of the program.
Hugs to you and Blessings for the New Year!!
I am seeing with a person I work with, that she is showing more signs to me that she is a narcissist. On Dec. 26th, my knee was hurting, sharp pains from my knee up my thigh. I came in early that day as the manager called asking if I would come in earlier than scheduled at 4pm. After a few hours at work, I asked the manager as it was very slow that day, if I get everything done, can I leave at 8pm...she knew I was hurting. She said yes, by all means. L was angry that I did this. She does not like working from 8-9pm by herself. I closed bakery that night, by me leaving early she did not have to do anything regarding bakery except if a customer wanted a cake out of the case. L seems to think that who ever is closing with her, they are suppose to help her. I have no problem helping my co-workers, but L is excessive in having you help her. If you are going a certain direction..."Oh Sharyn, since you are going that way can you take my tallow, or Oh Sharyn, since you are going that way can you do this or that." She has made some snide remarks about me leaving early that night, she very seldom will go out of her way to help others, she complains about how she is burned out, too old, ect., LOL!! She is a few years younger than me. I have gotten where I ignore her requests. Last night was again very slow, my knee again was hurting badly, I took my time making sure that the bakery was thoroughly cleaned more so than normal since it was slow. She could do the same in deli without help from me. Instead, not the first time she has done this...she left at 8:30pm instead of 9pm. I told her go ahead and leave but make sure the deli is closed because I am not going to finish your job plus mine. They want things super cleaned tonight and that is what I am doing. Oh well...there is a narcissist everywhere we turn.
If I can figure out a way to leave after giving up all income (I am disabled and lost all disability support by coming here) and all my possessions I will leave, even if it is the wrong thing to do. I am so sick of scummy people which my family is. I have to take responsibility that I made this very bad mistake to give everything up and move here to my father's on the other side of the country though. I so wish I didn't make such huge, stupid mistakes. I wonder if I will ever figure life out and get it right, I am already 52 and in very, very poor health and no ability to have relationships with men. (I have mad skills at relationship with my cat though! LOL God(dess) love her!)
At least I can come here and know I am not alone and I thank you all for that.
You can still move out and get back your disability checks. I have a friend who was getting $700/month of disability check when living in the states. She moved here on island, and had to re-apply for it. And so for a month, she had absolutely no income until they re-approved her - for the full amount! (We've heard stories here that when you move here to our island, the disability check is half the amount.)
I agree with I forget who said here that if your mom is considered to be competent, let her deal with her money. No matter what you're invariably going to hear about it, which I do feel bad about for your sake.
Those temperatures in your area are very cold. We've been having some very cold mornings here, but I know it should be hardly anything to complain about.
But it is doing a number on my sinuses.
I really hope that your friend's funeral service coincides with your trip to Edmonton. Definitely, when we are having these feelings it is great to have moral support, and good that you can rely on G for that.
Have a wonderful time at the dinner theatre. It's really good to hear that you are moving around, even if it's cold weather, and I laughed when you said that area is tropical by comparison.
Hugs, you are in my thoughts!
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
So when sister returned the next day, I hinted to her about this. But in her usual manner, my sister who called very stressed out last Sun., now was kind of blowing it off, by stressing how mom just got over last week, being sick. I didn't think this at all. I felt that her body probably was recuperating, resting.
Now my sister starts to tell me again as she has in the past about how SHE thinks mom really doesn't have Alz. Mom had been diagnosed by a GP for it. I'm of the opinion that a GP, in many cases just doesn't have the specialized training to make this diagnosis. She did have mother on too many Alz, and other meds. About 7 mos., ago when mother had her gallbladder removed, my sister decided that she'd cut back on half of the Alz meds, took her off her cholesterol, and BP, med also. My mom for a change became more awake and alert. My sister didn't let the doc know about this, and mom's had perfect cholesterol and BP, good readings.
But my sister was telling me, that even though mom doesn't do a lot of communicating, that lately she's become more honory. She was getting mom into her car the other day. Mom waved her hand over the hood of the car, and scratched it w/her nails. So my sister asked her not to do this, and my mom's response was, "I didn't touch your car w/my nails, I touched it w/the palm of my hands." I was surprised at this kind of a response, because I feel that in mom's condition this one would take some sharp thinking on her part. This is what my sister thought, also. However, my sister did start to emphasize mom being snippy, and rude, etc. Would an Alz patient be able to say something like this? Just wondering, since she really no longer initiates conversations, on her own.
On another note, though.....this kind of an attitude by mother reminds me of the old narcissist days She could be very frank, and many times defensive.
My sister is extremely impatient, and I had to think of how this comment by her was said.
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
This is terrible this situation with the co-worker.
She does sound like a narcissist.
Last night I was dealing with one too! I cooked dinner for 6 people last night.
My husband wanted to do this for especially a couple who is visiting from out of town. The husband is very intelligent, the wife too. But, here comes the BUT.
She is sooooooo pushy about how she approaches conversations with people.
Highly opinionated! You'd think that her opinion is like law. So yesterday, she repeatedly interrupted her husband, to edit, question and then give her interpretation of why her husband was saying certain things. But it was amusing how politely he ook the reigns of the conversation right back, and even went so far as to tell her to let him tell HIS story.
I made eggplant from scratch, which requires lots of prep, since I drain the slices of water. Then I made a sauce w/some ground beef, and layered this with cheese between layers. Her husband is a vegetarian.....so had to make a separate one for him, only. So sometime during the course of the evening, she mentioned how great the eggplant ready made up at a local chain store are real good. I thought this comment a bit on the rude side.
Later, before she left.....she managed to make a racist comment about Latino women, because her 39 yr. old son, apparently got taken advantage of by a Latino girlfriend, which involved marriage, and he naively becoming the legal parent of a kid, not his. So, she went as far as to say, "This experience w/my son has given me the impression that all Latino women come to this country to in other words, take advantage of people and the system." This is my culture,
and she's African American. When she said this, my hairs stood on end.
But our other friend jumped in, and reminded her that it's not only a Latin thing, etc. But I couldn't wait for her to leave.
Other than that, it was a good evening, just wish she'd not been there,
and no......I really don't know this woman. Truth be told, I think I know about as much as I would like to.
She must be a narcissist, too!
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
I wanted to say more about your co-worker, and I got off on a tangent, w/my issue,
sorry.
This is quite bad the way you are describing her, with this habit of telling you to get things.......because you're on your way towards a certain direction. I can understand when someone does this every now and again, but if it's like a habit they have.....no less you work with her. Definitely sounds as if there are some power plays at work with this one.
I haven't seen this program, that you mentioned. I am interested in all kinds of history. I've been doing some reading on this subject, cross referencing religions.
I'll have to have a look, don't know whether my service accesses this channel.
I hope you get to see what is going on with your knee. This whole insurance fiasco.
They make us believe that things are going to work out on this end. This does not address at all, how expensive some procedures are, and really? There are still IMO, too many rules re: insurance so that health needs just become inaccessible.
O.K., I'll get off my political soap box.
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
Wow, your guest was a piece of work!! With my big mouth, I probably would have said something to let her know I was of Latino heritage. How you kept from saying something shows great strength on your part. My son had a gf once who would make remarks to me,"your spinach dip is very good but the grocery store has one that tastes just like it, why spend the money on all the ingredients when you can get it ready made?" I wanted to slap her a few times. If people actually heard how they sound to other people, I think they would be so humiliated. I hope you don't have to entertain these guests again.
The woman I work with, I am debating whether she is a true narcissist or just very lonely. She was great last night, went out of her way to help which is what we all do when we close. Sometimes I feel like me or whoever she is working with is basically doing her work for her because she gets in these slumps where she just doesn't push herself too much at all. Last night, she was talking about if she had a job where she got off work by 5pm and had traditional days off,....what would I do with myself once I got home?? I have no one to go home to. Well of course this broke my heart for her because I remember when I was very lonely back in my 30's even though the kids where still young. I wanted companionship from my husband so I can understand where she is at but I still have to keep some boundaries there because it would be very easy to get overly involved with her trying to fill that void in her life. I suggested she do like I have done by crafting,etc. Maybe if she and I have a day off together, I will suggest we go out to some thrift stores but not make a habit of it with her. I ordered some sage from Amazon, this co-worker and another wanted some so I ordered 3 packages of it.
The dr. said I have bursitis in my knee. It does cause the same symptoms I have been having. He said to use motrin, knee pads whenever I have to get down on the floor on my knees for any type of work and ice packs. If it should get worse, I will go back.
I have to agree about the insurances. My insurance won't cover anything but generic meds....what if I need a new drug for some ailment? Am I out of luck, or just go in debt paying $300 co-pay on it if it is long term?
Hugs to you and enjoy the weekend.