Follow
Share
Read More
Margeaux,
I give them three high protein meals and lots of veggies every day, and they can have all the brownies they want. The PCP for both of them said they can eat whatever they want, as long as they eat...sugar doesn't seem to affect them that much, maybe because they eat the brownie right after dinner...I have also been pushing apple pie, which they love, and I use very little sugar for that, but they like it and apples, well, an apple a day and all that, guess it is okay whatever form. :)
Have a peaceful evening
Christine
(2)
Report

Margeaux, and since I posted, SD told me that sissy, yes sissy, called and cried to him on the phone for 20-30 minutes about not knowing of the visit, and how all these issues in the family are my fault and I get a gold star for that. Wonder what kind of a counselor she is!

Have not told sissies about prostate, he does not want me to. I am his medical POA so I will abide by that, it is his job to tell them if and when they want.

Yes, it was rough on me as well. At least they stayed in a hotel, and spent the days doing different things around the area. So, it was just feeding them dinner. His daughter did remark that this was the first time she was her that all meals were not eaten out. Can you imagine how difficult it is to get mom and him out, then add to it two more big people, and two little ones?! Impossible!

She was always the party girl and everyone's life better revolve around her needs. Well, I do not give a cr@@! I am off that freaking merry-go-round!
(4)
Report

Glad~Your sister is peace of work isn't she!! A true narc shark looking to be the center of attention. If a person states they want privacy, then you grant that to them. I am sure it was rough for you having the extra people there for dinner, our elders can only handle so much and when you add in their illness, it does become too much. I know I learned I won't tell family or personal friends anything about my daughter. Hang in there and try to find a way to release your stress, just like I am doing...maybe a walk will do us both some good.

Cam~I know you are getting alot of support and info, but I just want to add....is it at all possible your fil has a UTI (urinary tract infection), this can accelerate the dementia symptoms including the hallucinations...just a thought and I do agree with others about calling an ambulance...I know you don't want to add stress to your fil, but sometimes we need to so they are treated and evaluated sooner.
(2)
Report

Sharyn, I will meet you on the corner in five! Don't know what is wrong with me this morning. So many different things are sounding so wonderful! Just so tired of fighting all of this sister crap, if my mom understood what was going on it would probably kill her!
(1)
Report

Christine I would love to sample your diet or more appropriately move in and have it every day. I promise I would not keep you up all night either. Hugs
(1)
Report

Haha, Veronica, come on down! There is always enough food for an army around here. MIL is eating like a horse, which is wonderful, and she is gaining weight. She was in the worst shape to begin with, 80 lbs and losing weight. She is now at 94. My goal for her is 100. FIL is up and down, he was at 108 and is now at 111, but he has not been eating as much lately, he has had a bad spell for the past week or so. Working on him though, just have to find things he really likes, besides the brownies of course. :)
Have a peaceful day
Christine
(0)
Report

Glad,

Your sister really takes the cake, doesn't she!
I feel for your mom's husband. He must be a very nice guy to allow her to have him on the phone for that amount of time focusing the attention on herself!
How thoughtful of her.
I know that for a man, the issue of prostate can be private matter for them.
It was for my brother. He had an enlarged prostate, and was sent home with a catheter. Second time he had to have the surgery. One of our close female cousins found out about it, and when he found out, I could tell he was rather upset by this. I can understand.

I'm really sorry that she turned it into a blame session against you, also. It's disconcerting to think she's a counselor.

Hugs,
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
(1)
Report

Thank you Margeaux. Both sissies put the blame for all of this entirely on me. The expense they have caused all in the process of protecting their inheritance is absolutely insane while spending Mom's money to do it full well knowing what Mom's wishes are. If my Mom understood she would take care of them!

Narc sis has had these tearful conversations with my children trying to get sympathy and turn them against me. Two of my kiddos understand and see what is going on. One still struggles with what to think but is beginning to come around.

All of it so completely unnecessary! Could have been settled for a few thousand if sis had followed Mom's instructions and wishes.
(0)
Report

Glad, what a mess. I don't know what is wrong with people. My sister got a lot of flack from my brothers when she was taking care of my mother, who was ambulatory and lived next door to her. But my sister is fierce, and told my brothers off. There was no inheritance, luckily, or it would have been worse.
You are doing a heroic job.
Hugs
Christine
(1)
Report

Hmmm. Last night was quiet, and today everyone is peaceful. I am sort of holding my breath though...both MIL and FIL are out on the new deck, under an umbrella, enjoying the heat. And I am enjoying a little quiet time. I will go get them back in shortly, don't want to add dehydration or heat stroke to everything else. I made them bring their water out, but will likely have to make them drink it.
Have a peaceful day,
Christine
(2)
Report

Kind of quiet out there! This is my favorite thread to read as I go to sleep. It helps so much just knowing I am not the only one with a sacked out family! Night all. Tomorrow?
(1)
Report

mainly lurking today - have a good night, all!
(0)
Report

Kind of quiet, Glad? - as in "…***too*** quiet…"???

Don't worry, I'm sure our dear families will be up to something "interesting" before long. Oy vay, as they say in Buckingham Palace...
(2)
Report

Emjo and everyone who lives in Canada - Happy Canada's Day!!
(4)
Report

Lurking Joan as in sitting with a 2X4 on your lap to get thet mouse when he shows his face again?
(0)
Report

thanks, book. It s a good country.

cm - always, always... I think I have an underlying tension knowing that it won't be long before the next "incident".

veronica - what mouse? Do you know something I don't? Lurking as in reading but not posting much.

glad - misery loves company or something. Yup, it is great to have support from those who understand.

Thinking about all the junk I need to get rid of, Doing not too badly on the dysfunctional family side. Now to tackle the physical stuff. if it has lived in the basement for years without me needing it, I probably won't ever need it. Someone convince me of that.

Started thyroid meds again at a lower dose. I went for over a month without the meds to get my levels kicked down. The headaches I had apparently could be due to low thyroid. They have gone away since I started again. The symptoms can include just about anything and in some cases are the same for hypo and hyper which was the main reason why I went without to be sure my levels were low. Fatigue comes with both and I am coming out of that slowly. I'll see the doc soon and see what he has to say. They are reluctant to test for free T3 and T4 as the tests are more expensive than the TSH test, but it does not reflect my T3 and T4 levels.

Chance of thunder showers here today. The grass is looking good. My 7 year old honeysuckle in front took a beating this winter - no signs of life, but the branches are still not brittle. The one we planted in the back last year died. The coral bells died too. Looks like most everything else survived last winter but has been very slow.

Smell like summer outside. Think I will start a fire in the fire pit and burn some more junk. It gives a certain satisfaction.
(3)
Report

Well, I over did things this last week with working 2 different stores in 2 cities with heat and humidity. Much better today...looking forward to having thrusday off.

Take care everyone...hope tomorrow is less stressful for all of you!!
(0)
Report

I actually got this in my email yesterday, thought i would share it with you all!

Happy IVGLDSW Day!

Today is International Very Good Looking, Damn Smart Woman's Day, so please send this message to someone you think fits this description. Please do not send it back to me as I have already received it from a Very Good Looking, Damn Smart Woman! And remember this motto to live by: Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, totally worn out and screaming 'WOOO HOOOOO what a ride!'
(3)
Report

Glad,

I thought I was going to have to look this up in the abbreviations thread.
This is funny, and I'm looking for my chocolate right now, dark chocolate!

Yes, it's been rather quiet here. Well I think many of us were on that wild ride with Mercury Retrograde. I sure felt it. But Mercury went direct on July 1st.
Hope things start moving in a positive and forward motion for all of us here.

Much Love & Light! Margeaux
(2)
Report

Margeaux,
Mercury Retrograde? I had to google it, never heard of it, but yes, things are crazier than normal here! Now that explains it, and I am not even talking about Mom!;)
(2)
Report

My sister called today, and asked if I'd be willing to watch mom on 4th of July.
She apparently wants to take advantage of the 3 day weekend. I told her I would.
I have been down to see her, although it's been some time since I did relief.
Maybe we'll blow some firecrackers, just kidding. That might scare her.

When I told my husband I'd be going there the 4th, I could tell he kind of didn't like it, as in I would not be around for who know's what plan. We really don't have plans. But he understands, too. I'll probably be back here at home w/him, in the evening, because I'll spend the previous night, as I'm needed from 8:00 - 5::00, then a paid CG shows up.

O.K., I hope you all are not stressing, fretting about the 4th.
I wish you all some calm and peace.

Much Love & Light! Margeaux
(2)
Report

I just want to wish everyone a Happy Fourth if July!!!!!!!!!! marymember
(4)
Report

Geez, the 4th! Last year was bad, mom thought the city was being bombed. Thank god for hearing aids or lack of them for the next few nights! Why is it that the 4th has become a multi-day celebration?! Didn't all the shows used to be on just one day? The fourth?! But then I guess I am showing my age!
(1)
Report

Marymember~Have a Happy 4th of July!!
Glad~Yes, I agree about the fireworks being set off for several days in our neighborhood. I guess it shows my age because it gets so overdone and annoying. I do enjoy the fireworks the city does because they are pretty.

I am off tomorrow, but we are gearing up starting today for the 4th. At work, any Holiday is a 3 day event, even an all month event.

My daughter was release from the hospital yesterday after seeing a specialist. They decided the toxins were stable for now, but she has to see her dr 2 x 's a week for bp, and once a week for blood work and an ultra sound. She can still deliver early but we are hoping and praying she can reach 32 weeks if that should happen.

My sil's grandfather passed away on Sunday whick added to his anxiety about everything but he is doing better now. I texted my daughter today and asked if she was enjoying her freedom. She said YES!!! Hubby took her baby shopping and they bought tons of sh!t, she said, LOL!!! I asked her what they bought, she said highchairs, a pack n play, car seat and extra bases so both cars have the bases in them, bottles, a nursing tank, etc...more LOL!!! She has the pressure off her as she is now on disability (no working until after the boys are born).
(1)
Report

Hello,
Well, things in crazytown are getting crazier. Yesterday I took MIL to the dr., her hand is infected. FIL fell and got a similar wound on his hand, but got antibiotics and a tetanus shot and is healing. MIL didn't get anything from the ER. Anyway, while we were gone Charles had to stay with his dad, and dad was very restless. He was going on and on about having to cash a check to get money to go get fried chicken. He was trying to go out to the car. We just had a nice big deck built onto the front of the house, so they could walk outside with no stairs. He hasn't tried to get down the stairs yet, but I am getting a baby gate this weekend to prevent escape. Last night he was still restless, and wouldn't go to bed. At 10 I finally dragged him in there. At 1 am he started yelling at the top of his lungs. He had gotten out of bed somehow and was sitting on a chair in the dining room. He said we needed to go to the hospital right now, that we all had cancer. I tried to reassure him, but he was just wild eyed and I could not get through. All the commotion woke Charles up, and he finally picked his dad up and put him in his bed. And told him to shut up, we had to go to work in the morning. FIL was still ranting this morning but more quietly. He has a dr. appt. next week, and I am going to ask about a sedative or something for nights. It is difficult enough to deal with him but on no sleep it is getting impossible for me. I have been crying for the past couple of days.
Do I sound crazy? I am beginning to feel like I am. Wah.
Thanks for listening,
Christine
(1)
Report

Christine, you have my sympathy, dad did something similar a couple years ago, turned out it was the cortisone they had given him for pneumonia and he came out of it, but the crazies are no fun. My son had to come help us as we could not handle him.
(0)
Report

Christine-
Have you found that place for FIL? When he exhibits the behavior of last night, that is the time to call 911 and have him taken in for a psych evaluation. Do NOT agree to take him home, you need your life, your work, your family, your SANITY!
(2)
Report

I crossed the line. I interfered. I threatened to call the cops on my own family. Disloyalty. My parents abused us. My brothers (2 out of 3) followed their footsteps. A vicious cycle. Because their sons are doing the same to their spouses. I stepped out to have a talk with oldest sis who was sitting out on the porch just before midnight. As we were talking, nephew arrives home, ranting and raving. He's pissed off. Goes into his father's home (they all live together.) Next thing I know, he's getting mad, opens the door wide and is pushing his girlfriend (live together) out the door, with her silently struggling against it. He's trying to close the door on her - locking her out of the house. She has no car, her family lives in the other side of the island. He's manhandling her.

I started to get sooo angry. Vicious cycle. Seeing his father, using his pregnant wife's stomach as a punching bag and father uselessly telling him to stop, while we younger kids stood there with horror while he was trying to kill the baby inside.

I look at oldest sis. She's just sitting there, smoking and watching the scene of nephew pushing gf out, manhandling her. I cannot just stand there and PRETEND nothing is happening. I started running towards them, with real fear, because if he's like his father, and my father, he can turn against me - aunty or not. I started yelling at him, despite it being midnight, and my brother's 2 renters (families) might hear me - I yelled, "Stop it! Stop it! Or I'm going to call the cops!" The struggle ends, and he goes back inside. Gf is sitting outside, recovering.

And I find myself in the middle of the darn yard at midnight, and the spirits don't like me - and I'm in their territory. Plus, when I approached their home, I felt 'uncomfortable'. I'm not welcomed there - at night. So, I backed off, and went back to my porch. Stood there, staring, trying to see. It's so dark in their area. But no more yelling. Doesn't mean anything. He will use his gf as a punching bag. Like all abused people, like us kids, we learned to not make noise when being 'punished.' We learned to have a high tolerance for pain. I'm so upset. I cannot sleep. I hate this vicious cycle!!!! (I can't believe that oldest sis can just sit there, silently smoking, watching the scene unfold - and do nothing!)
(1)
Report

Last Resort, thank you, it helps me to write about it here, and thank you for listening to me wail...
Glad, I know, I keep thinking it is not bad enough yet to call the ambulance. This is why I feel crazy. How bad is going to be bad enough? I can't even think straight right now, between being upset and sleepless. I am fairly sure it will shorten his life to put him in a NH. And while I think that, I also think what is the point of him living, there is not much of him left. And it has only been a bit over a month since they arrived, he has gone downhill fast.
Breathe...
Christine
(0)
Report

Oh Book in our world on the mainland you did not cross any lines in fact you did not interfere enough. But in your world with the spirits and superstition swirling around you it was not possible to escape the culture. You know different but are paralysed with fear not of the participants but of the unknown blackness out there.
Oldest sis is not well and numbed by a life time of these observations. If you stood behind her with a gun she would take the bullet first. You know better and maybe one day you will be strong enough but not until you are truly independent and possibly off the island.
(2)
Report

Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter