
Many of us, myself included, come from a dysfunctional family which adds a lot of weight to the challenges of caregiving. I have read stores on various threads on other topics and decided it would be good to have a thread just for this topic for people to share, vent and discuss.
The idea for this thread originated on the thread named "The Caregiver....How are YOU doing today?"
https://www.canada.ca/en/financial-consumer-agency/services/insurance/make-complaint.html
The General Insurance Ombud Service, Toll Free: .877.225.0446
guest - we have contacted the provincial equivalent and taken their advice.
There is an internal (to the insurance co) complaint procedure that we gave to follow to get to their ombudsman, to the get to the Federal Ombud Service. We are ready to escalate to the next step of that as we have contacted the adjuster, her manager and her manager's manager and still have a mess. It is an onerous process but we will go through it. Thankfully, R is taking care of much of it for me and he is good with that kind of thing.
The last NH we saw is the latest model and we were quite impressed. It has only private rooms. The manager showed us around and he is quite proud of it. We are allowed one transfer after the first move and he said if we put this facility top of our list, she will get in there on that one transfer. The dining room for each "home" unit has only 4 tables and they all have table cloths. Being AB we pay the same very reasonable cost no matter which one she gets in. The second last one was very bright and nice and the semi privates have a half wall making them more private than some. All rooms had space for her pictures and a little furniture. A couple of the NHs were overcrowded and darker. One other large one we would consider as a friend of mother's was there. Part if this is knowing how to manage the system. She is fine where she is for now, barring any more meds issues.
Ali - hoping your move makes a big difference with your health issues. Also hoping that Trust comes through for you.
upsert - I am so glad that your aunt is surviving this well. Sounds like she will get resettled soon. That is not the case for so many who are struggling. We saw a photo of seniors sitting in a room with water up to their waists and more, waiting to be rescued. The floods are an epic disaster and waters are still rising in places. Recovery will take a very long time.
glad - the costs of this will be enormous. It is another insurance disaster like the fire here last year and particularly hard on those who do not have insurance. Here, some of the neighbourhoods which were burnt to the ground are about rebuilt, and ready for owners to move back.
Back home and though tired, so far so good. :)
I've had a good day with my aunt. She got her hair styled, plus mani-pedi. We went out to lunch. During the early 1950's she and her husband were stationed here in Maine at a now defunct Air Force base. I drove her out there to look around. It's now a community college. But they do have one of the old family housing units restored as a small museum. She was thrilled to see old photos of all the squadrons that were stationed there. She found a photo of her husband's squadron and a photo of he and a few other men working in a parachute room. I laughed when she said "look at that Jack still had hair back then". We also went by the old hospital where her two youngest children were born. She said she never imagined she would ever be back here visiting.
The problem with many and no flood insurance is their mortgage company relies on FEMA maps to determine whether a mortgagee is required to purchase it. Now mortgage company also takes a loss, but no doubt will try to get their customer to pay off the mortgage. I had a problem with a couple of mortgage payments during one of the past floods in Texas. I sent them, but evidently they are sitting at the bottom of the Gulf now.
And people with multi million dollar homes pay the same premiums as people with houses a small fraction of those giant mega homes. That is a broken system, but oh my, the views! Crazy!
Sounds like your trip went well golden. Ali hope the sinuses are better. I am convinced it is the house and your allergies. Excited for you to get out of there.
What a wonderful day you had with your aunt! It was great for her to see the old photos and old hospital. She will go back with some very good memories of her time with you. You are a one woman social services department! The caregivers must be very grateful for your support. It sounds like they very much need it.
Patathome01 - welcome I an sorry you had such a dysfun fam. Some of us have very difficult relationships with our sibs and know what it feels like to have no family. Are you and your bro or other sibs friendly? I am glad you are still able to work despite health problems. It is important to look after oneself.
glad - it is crazy that the premiums are the same. The trip was great. We always have a very good time on holidays
Fell asleep this afternoon on the sofa and am off to bed soon. R mowed, weeded, and watered the lawns, gave the evergreens fertilizer and water as well, and planted some burr oak acorns we picked up in Cardston. He is on the road again back to E'ton for business and will be back in a week or so, The friendly neighbourhood squirrel was watching him, so the acorns may be gone by morning. I must put out some sunflower seeds for him.
It is always good to be home after a trip, even though it was very enjoyable. The tomatoes were a bit scorched and windblown. There hasn't been a frost yet, which is a first in all the years I have been here for the beginning of September. But, we have about a dozen little tomatoes!!!! That was a nice surprise. R rigged stakes to tie the pots to so they won't blow over again.
Take care all!
On Friday, yesterday, I took a day of rest. I needed it. I felt so much better after I gave myself permission to have a lazy day, do some self care that needed doing.
Today, I listed more things from the house for sale online. We'll see if anything more comes of my listings. So far, I sold $100 of tools, gave quite a bit more tools away to a friend. It's a start. I'll gauge the response to selling online like this and if there aren't many more bites, then I'll have to consider having the charity organization "clean things out," which is what the Trust wants to do in this case.
I'm running the larger size air purifier in my bedroom now. So far, so good, no more middle of the night burning throat problems. I also put an extra blanket on the bed so I can leave the windows open.
This is all really great stuff, needed stuff, and on the path to finish some things up for the estate and the house. I found out that the listing price for the house is going to be quite a bit more than I had previously thought, quite a bit more than previously discussed. Who knows what the actual selling price will be, but it feels good to see that the Trust is trying to get a good amount for it, not "fire sale" it.
I picked up a bunch of pears in the yard. I have to do it every other day or it gets to be such a mess. The tree is almost done dropping pears. It's raining outside right now, so maybe they'll mostly be all down by tomorrow.
It's not an exciting life lol but it's good to be plodding along towards the goal.
How is everyone else doing? Happy weekend!
glad you had a good "down" day. They are well worth while, and, for me, necessary. You might plan one a week and see how it works! So good to have the receipts in. I can well believe that was a huge job. It is good that Trust is trying to get a fair price for the house. Sounds like you are going about getting rid of things in a sensible manner.
So glad that running the bigger air purifier is helping. I can't wait for you to get into another place. I love having windows open, even in cold weather. Fresh air - aaaah!!!
A neighbour has a tree covered with crab apples and they never pick them, though they keep the ground and sidewalk clean. I am going to ask if we can. They would make great applesauce. I want to make a preserve from the chokecherries R picked. I am hoping that the electric pressure cooker will cook them well enough to get some of the pulp. Last time I got only juice.
Right now I am still recovering from the trip, but mainly getting extra sleep which is a vast improvement on pain and fatigue. Keeping up with R is a challenge. I fell asleep during a video presentation at the carriage museum and had to sit for about 3/4 hr while R finished seeing the displays as my legs were aching. We then drove to Waterton and I passed on one walk to a waterfall as there was shale underfoot and I was wearing sandals. But I made the walk to a second waterfall with no problems and skipped back like a mountain goat leaving R behind. I don't like wearing heavy boots and most people had a hiking boot on or a heavy runner. Sandals allow me to feel the terrain under my feet,, so I was much surer than R on the rocks coming down. Anyone have any ideas about a lightweight runner that would allow my feet to feel the ground when I walk? Then I could have tackled the path with shale. Looking on the internet I found "Keen" shoes in town and will look at them.
Another blanket, Ali? Last night down to mid fifties Windows open, ceiling fan on. I had to turn off the fan about 3 and turn on the electric blanket. BRRR! Tomorrow supposed to be record breaking 100 degrees! UFFDA!
Great sunset tonight because of all the fires in the west.
- too much!!!
Golden- I agree that feeling the terrain during a walk is so much more pleasant! I have a pair of running sneakers that are light as a feather and conform to my feet. They lace up snuggly so I don't have to worry about my footwear slipping around like sandals do. I get a half size bigger to accommodate nice cushiony socks.
Upset-It sounds like your Aunt really enjoyed herself. What a lovely day you provided for her!
Welcome Patathome!
Mom and Dad had their PC appointments this week. Sis said both went well. Apparently there are no new concerns. That's a big relief on so many levels!
I guess Mom is causing a lot of drama around the caretakers. She insists that she is the primary caregiver to Dad and is trying to control their every move. Sis and I have become aware of a disturbing intolerance in Mom, for nonwhite caregivers. She makes accusations that are unfounded and says they are being disrespectful. All the caregivers are strong women who voice their opinions, that's a good thing because Mom would bulldoze them into dust if they did not stand up to her. However Mom only calls the caregivers who are not white, disrespectful. It's blatant.
Sure I hear the excuse, it's a "generational thing" but I still find it nauseating. Besides what generation are we talking about? I hear plenty of racist talk from all ages. Dad on the other hand, gets along equally well with all the caregivers and they all love him. Thank goodness for that.
No I can't change my Mom, but right now I really don't like her.
Sis told me today that Dad got fed up and told Mom to back off the woman who she accused of being disrespectful. That was good to hear!
My Dad was handicapped and people called him crippled and I hated that too.
trying - I am with you re plodding vs excitement, Can you give me a brand name for those sneakers? Glad your parents are OK and your dad has spoken up in defence of his caregiver. Fortunately mother gets along with caregivers from all areas of the world, but her doctor better be not be from some of them.
sharyn - how awful!
lucky - not nice at all.
Hopefully society has changed for the better in that account, though I know it is not perfect.
Sinus headache - just came on this evening. At times I wonder if it is this house and some remaining mold. Guess I will find out when I move.
Nite all!
Linda - re snacks, I pretty well keep to my normal food types, though convenience ones . I feel better that way. I make lettuce wraps with romaine and deli meats in the car, always have nuts or peanuts, and small peanut butters from breakfast, fruit and some other veggie like small bell peppers or celery - and - my dark chocolate! Cauliflower keeps quite well. Pepperoni works too. We often bring the little cans of lemon tuna and such, and cheese and small yogurts for R and can use those in a hotel instead of a meal.
I will check Merrells out. I don't mind paying a price for the right shoe. They last a long time for me. My "sensible" winter boots with a treads like truck tires are over 20 years old. I bought them at a sale for $9.00 so they don't owe me anything.
Still "floating" through the day. Kind of a nice feeling...
My aunt will be leaving on Thursday. She will be moving to San Antonio. Her children found her a nice independent senior apartment. She will have a lot to do, but they will be close by to help her. I've enjoyed her visit with me.
I've been dealing with another surprise bill compliments of my mom and brother. I'm glad I haven't closed the checking acct I was using to pay her bills. I think there was no end to what she let my brother and his family do. I had checked her credit report and this account did not appear. I called the company and they are to send me complete details on the account. It's so disheartening.
Lots of people missing in action. Proof that life changes once you have lost your LO, or simply are overwhelmed by life, or...
Ultrasound and bone density on Thursday, one cataract surgery in 11 days and the other 4 weeks later. Slowly crossing items off the list. Hopefully not too many will be added for a while. No word from the insurance again. We may have to go up a step. I will wait a little while longer.
(((((Hugs)))) to everyone!