The Caregiver & Dysfunctional Families: How are you doing?

Hey sorry to hear about the drastic weather changes from 41 - 8 next day, wow. Those extreme temp changes send me into a cough spell sometimes. Not good at all.

Ali, I hope the meds work out for you. I was doing the cq10 seemed to have uplifted me some now I am back into a slump.

I dont know events and things going on keep me rethinking myself. I feel guilty with the silent treatment from sister and nephew especially when they hold this vigil when they come from an apt. Its like they both have her in a corner for a couple of hours and then right back to normal. They go on their way and my mother is up and down stairs knocking at my door for every little thing to go to church,hair dresser get her stuff what ever. Sometimes I feel bad when she talks bad. About this one or that one, what they did and it really gets me when I hear her bad talking me using my name in one of her conspiracy because this is what feeds the isolation between the whole family. She changes when she recognizes me, so I never get the full thread or story line about what I did. But when I whispers to me with these conspiracies I cant help but think of her whispering same way about me. Yeah, I wish my mind would let things go but its my experience, I cant erase my memories and sometimes its triggered when I hear bad talk about some person because I know my mother mode of operation from past.

It turns out one of the property bill was not paid. I let N know. He responded that all he is getting critisism and no help. Of course he would feel that way if he has negative premises about me at the start. I mean he actually ignores me when I say anything which I try to avoid except I got these bill saying overdue and foreclosure.
So I just text him and said I appreciate what he does and I think he does a good job. This is after I text him about what does he need help with and how can I help. I realize he has a life, and is burdened and if the family was together it wouldnt be so lhard on us. but I also did not give him this burden and if he really looks back he would see that I have always been supportive in everyway of him, his mother and brother from day one.

I am venting, sometimes I just find myself in a place wondering where did every thing go wrong. I want to fix it but we all have to want it. I have a bitter spot in my heart from false hoods sabatoge and betrayals and slander. A lifetime of being blamed or made responsible while my twisted gets away with murder and feel entitled to do what ever she wants to me or my property.

We all are going through something, its good to vent. I hope that you all are making some progress in dealing with whatever the issue is.
I love my ah ha moments and I am SO looking forward to starting therapy.

Well rays of love light and peace to all.

Thanks to those of you have patience with my journal of my journey toward enlightenment. I look forward to the day when I can look back and see that I am okay and ended up just fine and that my worries and concerns were unfounded.

I am missing my son and his wife and the grands and I find myself wanting to get over there really fast.

Foreclosure notice? On your mom's house? How long have the property taxes been unpaid?

Duck, many communities have property tax discounts for the elderly. If you do, I assume your mom is eligible. Nephew may not have checked into it. Check your county's website information may be published there.

((((((lu))))) Low thyroid is a horrible feeling. I actually was put on it as a preteen, briefly, again when I was a later teen. In those days, they did not recognise borderline, so you had to be in bad shape bad before they prescribed it. It may have been a reason you didn't conceive. I always wondered why I didn't have trouble conceiving. I got pregnant very easily. But I think I was off and on borderline low a lot of my adult life. I am so thankful it is easy to treat. An inch of snow? We all are ready for winter to be over.

glad - rain and snow is a bad mix. No fun driving on a skating rink. Be careful. On the way down we had to detour because of an accident with fatalities. Wonderful viking strengths, glad. You inherited them for sure. Good idea for duck.

ali - for me one of the first things I noticed after starting on meds was the puffiness under my eyes decreased, and I was not as completely totally exhausted - still very tired, and that took a while to change, but not as flat out exhausted so I felt I could hardy draw another breath. I suspect the meds will make a big difference for you.

becky - take great care if it is slippery. Black ice is dangerous. You are banged up enough.

smesh thx - I have read about others who have to yell for that reason. Frustrating!!!! Geese still going south?? They must know something. I am glad there is support for the older gentleman. The time may some when he needs it. R's dad looked after his wife ( R's mother) for many years -she had mobility and heart issues but was still mentally sharp. Finally it became too much and they went to assisted living. She died while they were there and he had to go to an NH not long after. Very kind of you to keep him stocked up on banana bread. On going off and crying - I bet we all have at one time of another. It lets some of the steam out. Make no mistake - caregiving is one of the hardest jobs in the world. It gets to the essence of what we are made and challenges us to grow in ways we have never been challenged before.

duck - look after your health. The Sept 11th stuff has affected you. Also look after your mental health. When we have a very dysfunctional family we get sucked back in so easily. I built an imaginary wall between me and them of red brick with roses climbing over it and retreated behind it when I needed. Fix your room up, and like that nice man said. "Get a hobby!!!" Visit your son, do something good for you, and think on that. I know it isn't easy, but it is doable. You can't fix them - only yourself.

barb - foreclosure? I missed that

well - things are popping here. R is getting his business done, I have to go with him this morning for part of it, and in the middle of a very busy day yesterday, he got a call to go back north to meet the CEO of the company he interviewed for. So today will be a very early and busy day winding up business, and we drive back later on for his appointment tomorrow, The crazy sleep habits really got me today (woke up at 3) and I may be functioning on a few hours sleep only, but can sleep in the car on the way back. Breakfast starts here in about 1/2 hr. It would be great if he got this job, and we could spend some more time together. And he would be so relieved to be working again.

Time for a nice hot bath before breakfast. Take care all. Have a good day or at least have some good moments. 😊😊😊

Golden, travel safely.

I am sorry to duplicate but I am shamelessly desperate. Yesterday I posted this to "Family & Relationships" but really really wanted to post to "Dysfunctional Families" specifically. Following copied from elsewhere on Aging Care. Longish. Began with my "Intractable Pain" question in the "Senior Health" forum on Jan. 20. Want to thank those of you who posted for me there, but whose names I recognize from "Dysfunctional," as well as others because all of you were spot on. Especially the person who wondered why I had trouble with APS -- you removed my fog.

Sis is still recovering at home, though returns to work today after another (too frequent) steroid shot in spine. Her knee is so painful a brush of fabric causes a 10 response. I have no idea how she processes this, but she carries on OFF Percocet. I am suspecting along with Rheumatoid Arthritis, she has Fibromyalgia (brain changes that amplify pain), but it’s never been mentioned in her medical records.

I am proud to say I got over my “Blood on my hands” knee jerk, nauseated reaction to calling APS on her behalf. Years ago I had “interfered” with calling for help for my brother, and he violently committed suicide. Brother and I had separately moved over a thousand miles from Mom. I helped brother’s widow clean up the mess while Mom (by phone) insisted he was kidnapped by the “Chinese Mafia” (my brother sponsored a saint of an Taiwanese woman and married her) -- and threatened to disown me if I didn’t side with her. Her venom remains in my soul. Mom refused my father’s pleadings to travel to collect my brother’s ashes (which they never did, I handled it all). There’s something about PTSD /Stockholm that makes people (me) not react to things rationally. I guess at least I know I’m challenged and I have resumed therapy with this as it seems the camel's back is breaking.

I’m also proud to report that yes, I am on-goingly report Sis’s ongoing post-hospital issues to APS and it gives me peace. Sis thanks me, but I don’t think she has a clue the cataclysmic changes she will be dealing with. Sis yesterday updated me that APS has interviewed her, again, in Sis’s home and they are attempting to contact sons via phone. Sons of course do not answer. Sis says APS assured her they have their ways to find them. Meanwhile, youngest son has moved out and appears to see the heartbreaking abuse of the older son, which is quite a breakthrough.

Should I split this off into two separate queries (emotional vs. medical concerns) on two separate forums? I have a very hard time keeping up. Medically, Sis's neurosurgeon is recommending stenosis surgery (she’s 60, morbidly obese, asthma, severe Rheumatoid Arthritiis). I’ve been reading heavily about this, and am afraid for her. She’s so sweet and hopeful now, I can’t share with her the “success rates” I see. I know I eventually will, but am hoping the surgeon is forthright (Feb. 22 appointment). She has lost 20 pounds since she left the hospital, shooting for 50 before surgery. For the first time in her life, she’s seizing control of her weight and I am so proud of her. Her hope is a treasure for me. But I’ve been through my husband’s spine surgery, which failed, and I feel the nail-on the-chalkboard dread. Can’t help it. Sis has sought out her old therapist, but I’m not sure she can hang in with her many issues, long commutes, and a Cleveland winter.

Just thank you. All of your wisdoms are always gratefully “intook” and appreciated. I may not respond quickly, but I am so very grateful. Hoping I finally hit "Dysfunctional" target group.

Smeshque, we have geese here in Idaho. They fly over twice a Day year round. From what I read, these are Canadian geese that decided to stay here because we have an abundance of food. There are many and farmers have problems because they roost in their fallow fields. We also have owls. I hear them or one of them at night hooting when I take Midget out. I have concerns with the owls and hawks since Midget is a small dog. We are very close to the Birds of Prey area near the snake river. It’s just down the road about 22 miles from us.

Just popping in to say HI! Miss you all, hope I can come back in and finish catching up later this evening.

50's child, I'm SOOOOOO glad you called APS! In my humble opinion, you should just keep posting here!

I'll possibly stop feeling desperately tired, completely exhausted soon??? Oh, please please please let it be true. I fell asleep again at work today. It's ok, though, they're supportive and I get my work done, but it is WEIRD -- why am I so tired lately, even more so than I can remember being in many years? I can only guess that it's that I don't do my "sleep in day" 1-2x a week anymore. Every day is a work day now, but I get plenty of rest. In bed by 10pm, up at a late 8am or so. I don't think not-sleeping is an issue. WHO KNOWS. Counting the days until I can see/feel some help from the meds.

Duck, funny you should mention CoQ10. I bought a bottle of 400mg dose capsules last Sunday. I want to try a higher dose. It doesn't have toxicity levels until like 3k mg daily, as I recall. I have no clue if it really helps but I'm in a place to try things and that seemed like a good supplement to try higher dose.

Thanks, guys. I'm getting through and, right now, that's all that matters. I'm making it through one day at a time.

Thanks golden for your words. Hope travels go well.
Sharyn we have a screech owl, I believe it is a screech owl, sometimes sounds like a scary jungle at night.
Duck remember, Fear, HE is a liar.
I hope everyone is having a bearable day and maintaining. much appreciation to all of you for just being you. May God bless.

Ali I was taking 20mg. I felt up and good and running like a new spung chicken. Then it wore off. I had ordered 200mg but it seemed to be too much for me I didnt feel right. the reading on it is good in so many way and for high blood pressure which is also an issue.
So sorry to hear about that sleeping and feeling tired. Hope it resolves soon. I dont have a clue. I do know that once in a while I will go into a deep long sleep and be amazed at how long I slept. Now with my mother knocking and I forgot to mention they are working on the house next door renovating so that sounds like they were right in the room. Theyve been on my level the last to weeks I dont know what they building there its just knock knock knock. They are diligent take a break a lil after one and right back at it. sundays also. So a sudden knock is a sleep breaker for me constantly. Or a different kind cause I take the melatonin, start looking at a series and then I dose.
Sleep deprivation is dangerous. It affects us in a lot of ways. I work nights for many many years off and on. When I first started I realizeed I couldnt do any business. I would be forgettful. leave my id or wallet and have to go back to whereever. Put clothes in washer and forget all about it. Once on a long distance drive I realized I was sleep with my eyes wide open drifting into another lane where car blew horn loud and long on me. Scared me bad all that could happen. Why I remember the coffee from my grandmother. Just stopping to get it the process wakes me up. Well I will tend to ramble and bbamble on and on with this and that.

I am also fresh stepping out of a funk I had myself in. Being ignored and blocked out by the sane people you see the most. I started feeling like I was guilty or maybe I had sdone something wrong. I do sometimes like I call my self rebellng by not cleaning up that pee and do the dog leaves. It turns to stinch it seems to only affect me. I leave it to see what is going to happen. Most time my mother if her mind is in it will discard a chuck. wont put one back down. Then I feel guilt and shame and anger because nephew and sister just walk through sit aaround it and do nothing. Even the garbage cans loaded. Sometimes I get tired of being the maid then get told I dont do anything. I am the only one who feeds my mother on a daily basis and clean and spend time with her talking mess. trying to laugh with her or redirecting her and telling her how she has to be careful. and explaining why the stove is not on and just giving her attention and kisses and trying to make her feel loved. Then I get the cold shoulder from two people who dont even go past the liveing room in to the dinning area kitchen or bathroom and notice a light not working or the fridge unplugged. Today I just left top door open when I left. Call myself letting my twisted see the things that need to be watched with my mother. It wasnt cold out and the gate to do was locked. This is after I mopped, layed chucks and emptied and changed the garbage cans before work. Its so funny how I didnt pay any mind to what no one was doing untill my mother and now my sister would lash out that I dont do anything. Anywyas thats why I am hopeful about this therapy. maybe I can get down to the real nitty gritty on my blocks and issues.

Rays of light and jpeace to all. I am off for a few. Hope you all stay well and keep your head up and shoulders back with a contagious smile.

According to Cleveland Clinic and National Institutes of Health
Co Q 10 dosage should be 100 mg to 200 mg; over 200 mg daily should be under doctor's supervision. Over 200 mg the dose should be divided.

Phew! Holy doodle, I think I finally caught up! On this thread anyway. There sure is a lot of stuff going on for lots of folks right now! I....don't even know how to comment on individual stuff.....it's already 10:30 at night, lol.

I do know somebody (Ali??) was writing about getting a memory foam mattress....? I just got one too! Slept on it at home for the first time this past weekend. What a strange experience! I settled in Friday night, and as I sank down, I thought, "This ain't gonna work." But Saturday morning is the first time I've woken up with no pain in my dumb knee for 2 years. Getting out of the thing is a whole other story though....

Bruce is fine, I think. He's a bit p.o.'d about being cut off people food and having his Temptations cut back. (Probably the cause of his pancreatitis.) But other than that, he's running and jumping and seems pretty normal. I am trying to compensate with extra toys.

So, after the first 2 weekends at home, I decided to spend the 3rd dealing with "light." Not just metaphorically (although, yeah, metaphorically), but also I have all these weird little lamps and lights in nooks and crannies - like, I have a glass head that I filled with string lights. I have one of those salt lamps. I have weird glass accent lamps from Ikea and others I put together from thrift store finds. Most of the bulbs have died, or started to. So I decided to start cleaning up all the lights and replacing bulbs, pick away at it.

Anyway. Best guy friend came over Friday to help me get my music gear up my stairs, and he surprised me by bringing one of his lamps over.....this weird old floor lamp that, when we first met, I asked him to will to me. On Friday, he grinned and said, "Well, I thought, why wait till people are dead?" And he'd cleaned up the fluted glass shades, put fresh bulbs in, polished the brass....the funny thing is, he didn't KNOW I'd been planning to deal with the lighting that weekend! It's funny how your friends (chosen family) really do "get" you. We had an interesting talk about what it's been like for me, living under mom's depression.

It's interesting, because one of the few things mom and I still argue about is light. She wants the lights OFF. She wants heavy curtains and she wants them CLOSED. This isn't even a new, dementia-related thing. She's always been this way. "The light bothers me." The light always bothers her. Now that I'm older, I can see that it's depression-related, just as much as her addictions were/are.

Gosh, it's no wonder I couldn't wait to get home to my south-facing windows! I don't even HAVE curtains in the living room anymore. In fact, I remember when I first went to view the place, all those years ago....I walked into the living room, saw the sunlight glinting off the river, and thought, "I want to live here."

It's funny how long it took me to shake off the weight of my mother's depression after I moved out. But I must have done a good job, because I forgot it was like this until I started staying with her last June. Or maybe in the past, I just thought her preference for darkness and closed curtains was part of the alcoholism.

I guess maybe I'm trying to figure out why some people choose to live in the darkness and other people choose to live in the light.  Not just physical light and dark, but also metaphorical light and dark.  Is it a choice? Does she really choose darkness, or does she have no choice? I don't know. I know I deliberately chose to live in the light.  I also know that this "preference" illustrates wholly the difference between me and my mother. In amongst the kidney disease and dementia and addiction history, I somehow forgot that mom's depression has always been with us, snuffing out light wherever it sees it.

No wonder she gets so mean with me sometimes....I've always been a positive, "sunny" person, and it must drive her around the bend.

I hope you all don't mind this strange rumination, and I hope you all have a very good night!

Dori, My Mom was very negative and self-centered. Probably lifelong for her. I think many of her family members were that way. I don't like to be brought down like that. I prefer to be positive, although there have been many times that it would have been easy to slide down that rabbit hole. I think you have to stay upbeat even when it's difficult. If you don't you slide down into blaming others for your problems. I think it goes back to you have to love yourself, be your own best friend and remember that no one can make someone else happy. Your a light person - stay that way.

Dori, my mom was a lifetime negative. She was borderline personality disorder and even believed the government and AMA was trying to kill off the elderly. She talked about it often. I think to some extent, the negativity is part of the era she grew up in, being somewhat poor in wealth, living through the Great Depression, and learning the negativity from her parents. It can bring you down listening to someone talk like that all the time. Try redirecting her attention to something else if possible.

Still dealing with this sinus infection, ugh!

Have a safe trip Golden.

Becky, hope you are starting to feel a little better re headache.

Have a restful night all.

Becky - yes, I think that describes my mom's side of the family. Negative, critical, kind of self-centered....very untrusting of other people. And mom always complicated things with lies, secrets, cover-ups. Don't tell your grandad this, don't tell your brother that, don't tell your aunt ANY of this, and don't tell anyone, anywhere, ever, about anything that goes on inside the family. I had a very upfront conversation with mom when she moved here, about how I stopped living that way a long time ago, and how I wasn't going to engage in the game of lies and secrets just because she was here now.

Sharyn - I do think the negativity was learned from mom's father, so definitely similar. He was just....I mean, if there was ever a narcissist in the family, it was him! So sorry you're still dealing with a sinus infection, those are awful! Last one filled me up to my ears!

So in the theme of "light" and "honesty"....one of the things I loved about my dad and stepmom was that there was no pussyfooting around the truth! And that they always let me be me - encouraged it, even - and it was such sweet, sweet relief. Really, it amazes me that I didn't understand till now why I settled so near them....I always wondered if I was just playing it "safe" by not moving back to the big city. Now I don't think that was it at all.

Best guy friend asked me recently if I thought my parents would've stayed together, if not for the drinking. But I am pretty sure they were opposite ends of the personality spectrum and would never have survived one another, with or without alcohol!  Plus....I just don't even know who I'd be if it wasn't for my stepmom - the shiniest light of them all. 

Gosh, pieces of the family puzzle never stop coming together, do they?

Sweet dreams to all, and to all a good night!

Whoops, posted that twice!

Hi all

Back home after driving all Monday night. I did a couple of hours of driving as R was tired from stuff he had done and hadn't slept well. I was pleased I could drive and my eye didn't bother me. For some unknown reason, it is better - no more ghosts. Go figure. Wonder if the new lens will still work. R is waiting for an offer letter pending reference checks, so it looks good. He has to go back south today and I will stay put. He was up patching dry wall and crown molding before breakfast this morning. I am still not caught up on sleep.

Speaking of light, in the coming spring light, and as a result of the water leak and drywall removal/repairs, I am seeing dust everywhere and it is driving me nuts. I had just moved a lot of papers onto the kitchen table before the leak started. Fortunately, I was able to cover most of them. I need to get downsized and decluttered seriously, so cleaning is easier. If R gets this job, we will stay here another ~ 2 years and will take some winter breaks. Time to be ruthless again. I know I have said that before and not made much headway. The ice cream maker went out a week ago. That's some progress. He has one bedroom partially set up now, and will move a dresser downstairs, so I can finish that room and get rid of extra bed linens etc. It's an antique oak dresser, and he says he wants to reglue, and refinish it. Works for me! The other two bedrooms will be set up very simply, one as an office and one not sure yet. I am not buying more beds!

Blips with the real estate guy and some missing documents. Hopefully getting it straightened out.

Family puzzles - I think we have lost so many pieces, it will never come together.

Hope everyone is recovering, doing well, surviving and all that good stuff. Be good to you. I plan on a hot bath and an early night. 🛀 💤

Golden, why aren't you buying more beds; everyone else on AC is (me included)!
Have a good night, you all.... someone on the whine thread was very funny tonight, but I forget who it was now... oh, well...

Mally,
On the whine thread, it was "salad days".
On this thread it was "Holy Doodle".

So very funny, award winning funny!

You guys....someone else PMed me and remarked on "Holy Doodle".....I have to tell you I didn't even know it was funny! It's a phrase I picked up from a friend's daughters when they were VERY young (just starting school), and they weren't allowed to use real swear words. I've been using it so long that, well.....one daughter is a psych nurse now, and the other is the mother of a 1st grader!

golden, if you DO end up thinking of new beds and don't want to pay a lot....this mattress I bought off Amazon is quite comfortable! I am sitting on it (at my own place, woohoo!) right now. I still can't believe it came all squished up in a box.

Happy weekend, y'all!

Flanders and Swann had a whole song about swearing for juniors - the refrain goes "with a pee po' piddle bum DRAWERS."

Ah those days of happy innocence. And remember Almanzo Wilder getting into such a tangle with his yoke of oxen calves? - until he swore: "Gol ding it!"

mally and dori - I am downsizing in prep for moving, so at the most, if I need to fill up a bedroom (lost several beds to the forest fire here in 2016) I will get an inflatable mattress and perch it on something. I understand they dress up quite well.

send - salad days - saw the musical in London several lifetimes ago.

cm - I hadn't heard that Flanders and Swan. They are so funny! I never did get into the Wilders, nor Margaret Atwood for that matter.

becky - did they have to shave hair before drilling? Can't get my mind off that process. Sounds awful.

sharyn - hope you are over the sinus infection

duck - hang in there and keep praying.

stacey - trust all is well and you have had no recurrences of that pain

glad - another cold weekend to cuddle with Ming!

guest - hope the inlaws are coping with their stuff

Still haven't figured out a solution for mother's hearing. I will call her audiologist next week and see if he has any ideas. I got a headset and haven't figured out how to set it up with all the to-ing and fro- ing. May give techie son a call as I have other things I need to concentrate on, namely getting the kitchen back in order and taxes!!!!

The talk about negative parents has me wondering how much is inherited, and how much is learned, and thus can be unlearned. Difficult to separate, I suppose. You would never call my sister negative, but she can lash you with her tongue with the biggest smile on her face.

The ghosts (images) have reappeared as ghosts do. Wonder if I have to drive all night again to get rid of them. Maye the hours of using distance vision, as opposed to close vision, which is what I use most at home, had anything to do with their temporary disappearance. Maybe I need to stare off into the distance more...  Considering the very short night's sleep I had last night, I might fall asleep which would be a good thing. I hate it when I wake early, am just ready to fall back asleep, and those problems surface and want solutions, NOW!

The blip with the real estate guy was a big one, so we are almost back to square one. Oh well. This too will pass.

Take care. all.

Golden, They do shave a spot about 1 square inch. It honestly did not hurt.

Regarding negative: It would be very easy for me to be negative. But I work constantly not to. I think it’s an attitunal situation. Bargaining with oneself. “Susie was mean to me. She made my life miserable. So now I’m going to have it out with her” type thing. At this point I have to make the effort to not jump into being negative. For a long time I struggled, but now I can be positive without a lot of effort.

Being positive yourself attracts positive people into your life.

Golden when staging just set an inflatable mattress on boxes or 5 gallon buckets. A long bedskirt and pretty cover and pillows make it look normal. It is undetectable unless some idiot jumps on it then they are in for a big surprise.!!! My Realtor had a rival put a hole in one of hers.

Inflatable mattresses are great if you don't have goatheads! It worked fine in last location, but here the goatheads got it relatively quickly. Debating on whether to try to patch it or just toss it. I did buy a new queen bed for when kids visit. Probably toss the inflatable. Then buy one more twin bed, I have one for new house.

Am getting ready. Got prequalified, my eyes on a lot, just figure out the builder. I am excited but apprehensive. I have had new homes before but they were alway built before I contracted on them. Ahh, commitment can be a PITA!

No goat heads here, Glad, but you never know about idiots jumping on it, Veronica

becky a square inch isn't that bad I guess. I am glad it was not uncomfortable and that your injury was not worse. I agree being negative or otherwise is a choice, and it can be hard work.

I realized why I am so fixated in the process, other than a general interest in ancient/old practices in medicine. My youngest son died from a traumatic brain injury and accompanying brain swelling. They operated trying to relieve pressure, but the damage was too great. We watched the pressure gauge/recording climbing much too high. I spoke to him and said, "G, you can bring it down, you can do it," and it would come down for a while. When we left that night it was reasonable. The next morning, when we returned, I nearly passed out as I saw how high the pressure was then, and I knew he couldn't survive. I have been having flashbacks today. It doesn't go away, even over 15 years later. Just my life now. 

glad - congrats on getting prequalified. I have never been involved in the building of a home either, not have ever wanted to be. It looks like a lot of work!!!! I hear you about commitment! But, I am glad you are comfortable enough about your situation to make that decision. Being settled in your own place is a good thing.

With R now having interviews up here and each one seeming closer to success than the last, things are on hold for a while. I give up trying to plan for now - just have to go with the flow, and get the house sorted.

Just wanted to let everyone know my brother that had dementia and catatonic die Friday the 8th. Pray for my strength. Because now I have to deal with this disfunual family, who all had him dead long before death. Just pray my strength in Jesus. Thank You