
Many of us, myself included, come from a dysfunctional family which adds a lot of weight to the challenges of caregiving. I have read stores on various threads on other topics and decided it would be good to have a thread just for this topic for people to share, vent and discuss.
The idea for this thread originated on the thread named "The Caregiver....How are YOU doing today?"
What's most interesting to me is that it manifested as mental health symptoms. I was having manic thoughts, then some tears, and this kept happening for a couple of hours... in a nightclub. That's not normal exhaustion symptoms. Maybe I triggered it by pushing myself too much, I don't know. I'll tell therapist and psych and maybe I can find a way to get more stable. I can recognize it but I can't stop it from happening.
Things are really are ok with me, though. I'm moving in a few months into a new apartment, a 3 bedroom with tons more room than my current place, and rent is the same. I might get some roommates, too, but I'll have to pick carefully because I need them to be very calm and responsible people, haha. But... I'm on a decent enough trajectory for my limitations right now.
I am just checking in to say hi and wish you all a Happy Holiday.
I wish you rays of light love happiness and peace as you struggle with the day to day issues that come your way.
I have been busy, still an emotional and mental wreck. Still same saga. Today I left for work later and heard my sister telling my mother not to come up stairs with her and why is she comming up there and if she comes up she is not going to let her in. I will be going away next week to see my son. Will alert my nephew that I am leaving. Other than that I have been struggling with the same issues only worse now. Because ........well it was not my intention to go here. Just saying hi and I miss you all. I tried to review a little but its a lot. Becky I wish you the best in all especially with the health issues. Golden, seems as if you have found THAT place. I hope so and wish you the best. Ali I look forward to hearing about the therapy and psych especially what helps. I am seeing a therapist. Its helpful, very much so. I get good ah ha's but I am basically still stuck in this mental and emtional vacuum about me, my mother and my sister and our dysfunction. I continue to grow, but I am very tired and burnt out. this vacation is well needed. I just hope my mother will be okay because of the true situation of that house. Sometimes I dont want to believe what I am experincing. Sometimes I feel sad for her, I feel that she knows deep inside how she has raise us and her ugly deeds. she looked real pitiful when I went to see where she was on my sisters floor befofe I went to work. she was in the bathroom fiddling around my sisters door was open. I opened the door when she was nasty talking my mother so I guess she knew sI would come and see what was up with my mother. So when I go the whole sha bang is going to come to the foreground. My cousin is not doing well, her shortness of breath is worsening, lots of blood transfusions and platelets which is a bad sign to me. She cant walk a few steps without stoping to catch her breath.
I didnt mean to pop in and write a book. I think of this AGing Care family very often. Just lately if Im not overwhelmed then I am recuperating from some hurdle I made.
Much love to you all.
Sharyn, I certainly understand the difficulties the family is having. My dad's mom always told me to never have one child. Dad's passing by suicide was very, very hard on her. Our children are not supposed to pass before us.
Good to see you Duck. Enjoy your vacation and visit with your son. He is overseas right? Korea maybe?
Sharyn, Can't imagine how hard that is on everyone; you have to wonder what the person who does it is thinking? Years ago I tried it; I used to have what I call "black depressions", when I couldn't even call someone to talk to; couldn't think of a soul in the world to call.... The Lord saved me with a miracle; someone who hated me found and took me to the hospital; said he had no idea why he did it (but I do). The feeling at the time was of no hope; guess she felt the same way.
Just a quick post on my way to bed to report: I think mom's new bedroom TV is turning out to be the ticket to my sanity after all! Three evenings in a row, I've had the main living area all to myself (and friends, one of those nights). Woooo! I should've done this a year ago!
Needed to go to pick up milk. Usually buy 2% but decided to buy 1% this time. Got up about 11pm for my midnight snack of half peanut butter Sammy and milk. At first I thought that the milk had curdled, it poured so thick. Then realised that I bought buttermilk accidentally. What a surprise that would have been if I hadn't noticed before taking a gulp! Why is the color of the buttermilk label and cap the same as 1% milk?! Now I will have to go to the store again. Buttermilk, not so bad, I used to drink it once in awhile as a kid. We always had it in the fridge for a cleaning woman that would come to mom's a couple times a month.
Those two things just on my mind while I deal with a bit of insomnia. I have been sleeping much better the past couple of weeks, except for the back pain a couple nights this week and of course the 4th. Obnoxious neighbors were blowing off obviously illegal fireworks until 4:00 am yesterday. Quiet tonight though. Now try to get to sleep. 🌛
I do have news...my brother is at Stanford waiting his transplant, probably tomorrow. I’m nervous for him yet bittersweet if that makes sense (regarding the donor).
Prayers, positive thoughts are appreciated.
Of course you will get prayers all along, for you and brother.
It would be perfectly normal if you were beside yourself.
Many hugs!
Rather than worrying tonight try to spend even a minute before you go
to sleep imagining your brother well and recovered after the transplant
What is his favorite pastime? See him doing it - hear him tell you how good he feels - feel the smile on your face - even the tears on your cheeks
Rest well
Sharyn, I am so happy for your brother getting a transplant. I think more and more people are becoming organ donors. And I know that the transplant list is long. I wish you both the best.
Golden I am always thinking of you when I am not on line.
Everyone I miss you all and forgive me if I didnt shout out personnally. I havent caught up I just read this last page. I am training a nurse tonight so my time is limited. I am going to Korea God Willing in 2 days and my anxiety level is a 10. Once I am there I may have time to share, as I will be at leisure, especially when the grands get over my newness! LoL.
Anyways I miss you all and have much love in my heart for you all. Believe me all, your names stay in my heart. So many of you have touched my life deeply with simple words, honesty and understanding. I am still growing in my dilemas but I feel a little be stronger.
Rays of light, love and peace to you all.
Hoping the delay does not hurt him, but so glad they are being selective and so very careful. This waiting thing, just to be delayed is usual for the docs, but so sorry for this difficult time for your brother and for you.
Still, prayers anew.
Hope you are okay Sharyn.
My brother tells me they are very close to being able to genetically modify donor organs to have the same DNA as the recipient's. (Like, they can do it now, but it's still in the testing stage or something.) So that means a perfect match - no rejection issues, and the recipient doesn't even have to take anti-rejection drugs. That's pretty exciting stuff!
Prayers to you, Sharyn and your brother. {{Hugs}}