
Many of us, myself included, come from a dysfunctional family which adds a lot of weight to the challenges of caregiving. I have read stores on various threads on other topics and decided it would be good to have a thread just for this topic for people to share, vent and discuss.
The idea for this thread originated on the thread named "The Caregiver....How are YOU doing today?"
But, I think because we, as caregivers, have to put up a lot of yucky stuff, and our parent's terrible disposition towards US but not to other family members/outsiders - in order for us to survive this abuse - we have a strange way of viewing it. I have found so many things funny here. When I try to tell it to sis, she doesn’t think it’s funny nor that it is a laughing matter. You see, they live Normally. We, as caregivers, need to find humor in our life or else we go crazy or get a nervous breakdown. So, I just shrug it off and still laugh …though it’s "not a laughing matter"… ;)
Margeaux~Yes, having the information and being informed helps to be prepared. I can't wait to see my daughter and go shopping with her. I miss that since she moved there. I will have both my babies home for Thanksgiving too!! It will be great for my mother to see both my son and my daughter together. I am thinking about you too and you are doing great standing your ground with your sis! Love and Hugs!!
The attorney you spoke with, sounds like she knows her stuff.
At least you have the information about much costs would come to, and she really sounds like she's not pressuring you. Better to be informed, before any of these circumstances come to a head.
We too, the four siblings recently met with an attorney, also a woman.
She also knows her stuff, from what I observed.
But anyway, these are things anybody in your shoes is way better off knowing.
Given what you've shared about your sister's health, you have to prepare yourself.
Of course this doesn't mean you must go ahead and seek a conservatorship as your only means of action, ether. I certainly never grow tired of hearing whatever people say on this thread. This is really the way we come to know one another too.
Anyway, take it slowly, and I'm thinking about you!
Have a great time on your trip to Idaho! Much Love, Margeaux
Sometimes, the posters get silly/hilarious as a way to vent their frustrations. Plus it helps us to laugh and you've heard that laughter is good for us. And there's some of us who so serious, that we vent seriously (that's me!) But, I think if I hang around long enough here, their antics will affect me and I can loosen up enough to be silly back to them... Take care, and please come back! HUGS to you!!!
;) lol don't know how you manage at your mum's without much of your own space - it would drive me nuts.
sharyn - that could be interesting when your mum gets the bill - better to laugh than to cry. I wonder what story she will make up - probably will be your sis's fault ;p
I totally agree with you regarding the funeral. When you are ready to be there it will happen for you. There is no time limit on grief so take your time and do what feels best for you. A 5 hour trip is tiring and not only being there for your dear friend (who clearly is understanding), dealing with your own memories and PTSD is going to be very emotional for your and then if you factor in your mother on top of all that...it is a large emotional toll to deal with. Take care of your emotions right now. ((((HUGS)))) to you!!!!
thanks jessie, I understand what you are saying, and thought that, but the feelings have hit really hard. Child loss is so much worse than any other. Gary thought the same as you as he has had that sort of experience., and so did I initially, but then the PTSD clicked in. The "manual" for child loss says do what feels right, and don't push yourself into things, ... and it doesn't feel right to me. My friend has lots of support right now and i will visit her later. The support tends to fade away pretty quickly. I know the journey she is on, and that in a couple of months her pain will be indescribably - right now she is numb. You are right, the feelings go beyond what normal words describe.
thanks austin - it is a long trip and to drive it when i am feeling emotional isn't smart. I have been friends with the "comforting" lady for about 45 years - we have been through a lot together. I was with her in the hospital room when her husband died.. I hope we don't have any more bear visits. I have seen them across the street on the trail, but never, to my knowledge on our property. It makes me nervous about walking the trails. Your friend did the right thing.
I am not surprised that you are having some trouble sleeping. I imagine you have a huge spirit of unrest on you. I have a feeling you will be all right. I am glad you are not telling your mother you are coming. It sounds like you need this trip to be about your friend and you. I hope you find something joyful in all the sadness.
hey're coming to take me away, HA HA
They're coming to take me away, HO HO HEE HEE HA HA
To the funny farm
Where life is beautiful all the time
And I'll be happy to see
Those nice, young men
In their clean, white coats
And they're coming to take me away, Ha-haaa!