
Many of us, myself included, come from a dysfunctional family which adds a lot of weight to the challenges of caregiving. I have read stores on various threads on other topics and decided it would be good to have a thread just for this topic for people to share, vent and discuss.
The idea for this thread originated on the thread named "The Caregiver....How are YOU doing today?"
I want to offer my condolences for the passing of your mom. Ah yes, now we must deal with all the other members of the family! Your feelings are completely normal for a gathering as such. You humor is great! I use humor all of the time to get me throu tough situations, or at least lighten them. You are certainly not alone with respect to dysfunction, and the dreaded anxiety it can trigger. I had some of this last week, also on account of a family gathering, I attended this last weekend. I'll write about this tomorrow, though. But meanwhile, hang in there! Margeaux
I would like to wish everyone a very happy Mother's Day! I hope all of you, are enjoying it, by doing at least a little something you like, whether that's a bubble bath, eating a hunk of good chocolate, anything! Love and Light! Margeaux
. (((((austin))))) Pitting one against another - oh yes! My mother and my sister use each other against me -has always been so. The eternal triangle - use one to hurt the third. Good for you for calling. I sent an ecard. You are right we are not promised a tomorrow. So glad you have a great church family. God provides.
Hope you come back and tell us more about you and your situation. Caregiving is one of the hardest jobs in this world, and there are lots here with much experience.
(((((((hugs)))))
Joan
O.K., Sharynmarie, your on it w/the legal matters, it will be resolved because you are giving it the proper energy. Meanwhile, I will be thinking about you and your mom. You are a wonderful daughter to her! Love and tons of light! Margeaux
Pineapple, what a blessing in your situation that you have this knowledge. Have you decided on a course of action? Sibs can be the biggest problem, Mine is probably worse than my mother, and would take me to court in a minute if she thought she could get anything out of it. I found out recently from her estranged son, who she has disinherited, that she has been obsessed for years with her potential inheritance from mother, and hoping to get it all. I was written out fo mother's will at one point, but she (mother) has reversed that. Oh, what a tangled web we weave...
sharyn I aked about you on another thread, It all seems to get more complicated for you by the minute. They are their own worst enemies, but blame everyone else. It is so frustrating and draining. My mother has now decided she has to move - to another city to be near a "friend" who is barely an acquaintance. I will not help her do this, as I believe she is as well off as she can be where she is. It is the old geographical change routine. She will not be happy anywhere for long, and moving takes up resources. I have had to change doctors, as my gut infection is not improving any more, and if it flares up again that is serious. I felt my old doctor was humoring me. I see already my new one has made a mistake on the requistion for tests, so I will have to go back to him today and get that corrected. We don't have great choices here, but at least he is ordering tests. What a balancing act we all are going through
pineapple that sounds like a nightmare.
vhope sounds like you are stepping back and taking a breath. We all need to hugs to all
Joan
Hang in there Pineapple, I hope all settles down for you soon. I hope everyone else on this thread gets some peace and rest regarding your situations, we sure need it!!
In our family, when my sister was the re-appointed POA after our brother messed it all up, our mother's, aunt's (her sister) financial matters were in bad shape. This event happened about 4 yrs., ago and my sister was telling me that to date, she's still unscrambling this mess. There was one issue in particular where our aunt, made my sister recently believe she was no longer POA, for her. So when my sis tried communicating w/aunt's attorney, they wouldn't return calls. Finally my sister found this out on her own from that very attorney. But she was trying to address some problem about a change of title, on a property owned by aunt, which had been re-assessed. This meant taxes went up. Attorney's mistake. My sister and the other brother (nice one) who's next in line as POA, haven't pursued this error?? by that attorney, yet. I'm not at all in this mix, but I've been thinking that if they don't pursue it, that isn't good on a lot of levels. I'm a firm believer, that we shouldn't allow people to rip off our elders, or jerk them around.
You'll do well, and I'll be thinking of you! Stay strong! Margeaux
Hi and hugs to everyone - Joan