The Caregiver & Dysfunctional Families: How are you doing?

You can also look on Nextdoor.com for some great deals Glad.

I look around this new house of mine and start thinking, I need this and this and this.... Wanting to downsize, but some things are really necessary. Just ordered four bar stools for kitchen counter from Amazon, then took up on offer for new credit card, and a gift card, final cost of those stools? $23.00! :)

Hi all - been immersed in some interesting reading...

duck - sounds like you are making progress re the lawyer.. You have to accept the past and the present. No one can go home as they say, meaning you can't recapture the past, or what was missing in it. You have to build on your todays. Flashbacks can be hard to deal with, but recognizing what they are helps. I think you will be better off when you have your own place, and are not faced with the dysfunction daily.

fraz - what a difficult path finding the right treatment for your mum. I think it is worth trying anything to see if it helps. I to looked to others for mother-figures too. It helped. At least I have only one more year of mothers taxes to do now. Then I can get caught up on mine, I used the end of the good bubble bath I have (that I ordered anew) and I think I am going to be OK with it. Each step now in wrapping up mother business is a bigger percent of what is left. I expect when it is all over I may have a big cry from the relief.

sharyn - mel robbins looks like good stuff. (((((hugs))))to you.

staceeeee - so glad to see your update. Sounds like your life is moving along very well. I agree that staying with your sis is better than with your dd though I understand that she may be a bit put off for a while. Much better to be more independent. Hope you start to sleep better. I know that problem. My gut issues flared up too since mother died. I know it is just a stress thing, We have to stop letting things get to us!!!! Spend some time chilling and relaxing. You have been through so much.

glad - you are having wind and cold too. Can't go on for too many more weeks now. A house blew away. Oh, my goodness!!!! I am happy the woman and her kitties are OK.

smilebeth - it gets hard when you have to stand up to a parent, but you are doing the right things. I went through that too, and it is very stressful. It is good that you see it is his fear behind it.

nomore - ((((((hugs))))) your mother obviously has twisted thinking. Are you getting treatment for your suicidal ideation? Many year ago I had suicidal ideation when under great stress from mother. I wasn't the least bit interested in doing it, but these ideas kept coming into my head. You are in a situation that is very toxic to you. So glad you are feeling the anger -let it fuel you to help you look after yourself and get out of there. Anger is very appropriate sometimes!

Went to a new doctor today in the local shopping center right next to my drugstore and across from the grocery store. Doesn't get handier than that. She was nice and I think it will work. That's a real blessing for me.

Waiting for the lawyer's office to send documents for review before going down to sign. Starting to look at plans for the funeral next fall. Washed all of mother's clothes I brought up and they are all going to the thrift shop. It must have been part of my processing the end of this era. I wasn't quite ready to let go of them in December. Had some time missing my father this past few days. So much energy had been spent on mother that past few years, My guts are settling down. Things are good other than I have to take off some winter weight before the winter is over. The clothes still fit but the scale told me a story that I didn't want to hear!!! Oh well. It is doable. Back to low carb tomorrow.

Have a good night everyone. Be good to you.

She’s being taken off the opiates and she’s already getting crankier and was saying how my friends 13 year old son (who is an exemplary and sweet and bright young man who has started his own nonprofit organization to benefit the homeless—a wonderful young man with a very bright future) is “stupid” for not “thinking about himself”. That you have to think about yourself and not others and that he needs to live in the “Real world”. I reminded her of her supposed Christian Faith being opposed to such thinking (that’s when she snapped about living in the real world).

I’m less suicidal today and just plain angry.

Thanks everyone. I know what I need to do and am trying to stay strong. I told him this morning and he is you just want me to give up and go to nursing home. I said no, I want you to go to rehab so you can home. He is so scared he won't go home. I get it but told him you can do it. He still is in denial and wants to do it his way. Thank you for all the support. Helps to talk. My husband supports me and in my heart know it's right just have to stand my ground.

Hugs, Beth, I'm sorry you and your dad are going through this. I would still continue to stand your ground and definitely don't lie to the nurse or caseworker on your dad's behalf. Just reiterate that your answer is no, you are unable to be there 24 hours a day for the length of time that is needed. They will probably not discharge him to home care and he will need to go ahead and go to the rehab, which is safer and better for him than risking going home and the wound getting more infected. Your dad will probably be a little upset about it at first, but he will be in a good place to be able to get the care that he needs.

Beth, Dad needs rehab care for that wound. Dad needs more care than you can possibly provide. Wouldn't it be better for dad to hope rehab is the end of this instead of getting on that merry-go-round of in hospital, home, back to hospital if he does not get the care he needs now?

You may want to post a new question or discussion for more response.

Hugs, Smilebeth.

Your father can make this terrible crazy decision if he wants to, but he can't make you help him. Don't plead with him any more, don't try to change his mind, just tell him you won't change yours and you've nothing more to say.

My dad got a sore that turned into a bad wound. He finally went to doctor and they sent a wound nurse she convinced my dad who hates hospitals to go get care. My dad picked the hospital he does like and went. I went to see him Sunday. The wound is to the bone right above his butt. It's the most horrible thing I have ever seen. They are treating him. I'm so grateful. They are giving him antibiotics. So now he is trying to figure out how to get home. The one agency can train me to do the IV bag replacement but they want my guarantee I will be there 24/7 or close 30 mins away. (I live in laramie 100miles away) I explained I can take some time off but not 4-6 weeks. They cannot train his one caregiver bc of the rules. They made it very clear someone needs to be there at night when it goes off from an error or if it get ripped out he could bleed out. They won't take him on for wound home care, unless I am there to do the IV. I'm in contact with case manager at hospital, case manager with his disability, my dad refuses to go to a rehab/nursing facility knows he can do this at home. I've told him I can't be there for that amount of time, what if you go to rehab for part if it. No he doesn't like that. I said when I tell them I will be there I'm not lying and getting in trouble if something happens, plus I don't want anything to happen. Oh he thinks we are making too big a deal, he will find more help and an RN to do IV. Im like you haven't found help for years and now you can? He needs to go home to handle things. I said I can help with those things. He doesn't like that he can't leave the rehab place, doesn't like he can't smoke. I told him if this infection gets worse you could die. He knows and promises me he is not going to let it get bad. Ha I tell him you have a wound on your back the size of a fist but now You know better. He will check himself into the rehab if this doesn't work. So he wants me to lie to this agency so he can work the loop hole to go home. I'm just tired. I love him, want to get well. It's been so nice to know he is getting care. I'm busy at work. Putting my head in hands. Why does it have to be so hard with some family. Me I'd go get the care. Him no wants to do it his way.

Oh Glad, yes! I think of all the ruminating I did and being stuck in thoughts that created more anxiety.

Stacey, always good to hear from you. I think it wise to take sis up on her offer. It would be very hard to live with my kids. Their lives are so busy and noisy children I enjoy my quiet time too much. Great you will be moving soon.

Duck the blue glass is still a bit too blue, but getting used to it. And lights in my bathroom I will need to replace if I can ever find one long enough for over the vanity without spending a fortune. Need one about 60" long for over a 72" vanity.

Sharyn, where was Mel Robbins when I needed him? Those days OMG I just could not turn my brain off. Thinking back, just so odd to think about.

Duck, just press the brain switch off. And try to relax and realize how all of this one day will not be an issue any longer. So much of it just sounds like pettiness. Twisted probably keeps herself awake at night trying to think of ways to get to you.

Had blizzard warning yesterday into this morning. Lots of wind, not much snow. Story on news about a woman's tiny home blew over in the wind with her in it. Tiny homes not all that great an idea, if you ask me. And this woman had two cats in the home with her. House didn't just tip over it tumbled down the road a few hundred yards. She and cats are ok. Tumbling tiny homes.😧

Sharyn, Thank You! Love it. At first I thought I had checked her out but it was Tony Robbin, Im not your guru.

This is great. Very real and helpful!!

Sharyn, thanks amundo, Im on it. I have it lined up to watch next.

Staceyb, glad you have such positive excitement and changes going on, all the best.

Heaven to Murgatroy!! I have good news!!!! I learned from lawyer that the health care proxy is powerless outside of hospital in so many words. Well now here I go again. Now I have to delve into the world of home care issues. Oh boy! More stress. I am going to take it slow. Just this visit had me messed up thinking anxious from the first canceled appointment.

So I spoke with MOW case manager last week. She will be out for 3 weeks for surgery. I already had idea of things needed, the financial information and bills its not all together but I have a lot. Lawyer says if my sister tries to interfere then I would have to appeal to APS for article 381 or something like that.
Its going to be a big process, I am nervous, not just getting the care in home but now the actual caregiver, setting up schedules, finding out how much time I will get

Today as I tried to rest, I heart nephew maybe both at different times. The lock was off the door when I went to get mail. My mother was in her busy mode up and down stairs. In door way upstairs a lot and I am so glad she did not get to the door that was unlocked. Naturally it would have been my fault. Its happened quite a few time. In frustation I never mention it because of the blame game it would be invalidated it. Tonight I right a note for door to please make sure it is locked and that it found unlocked. So tired of the petty, it feels petty but what else is there to do.

Also the shower head was manipulated again. It almost makes me feel good when my twisted does that, because I know I did something good. Now the other times I had not retaliated on anything but this time and once before I decided that anytime she puts the microwave on floor I will do the same with hers. 1st time nothing. Its petty. Sometimes I cant take but so much. I know how pompous her thinking is being the spoiled protege of my mother.

Anyway I am happy. I have to start investigating memory programs and other things my mother may be eligible for. Its going to be long and drawn out for me becuase I procastinate naturally but also because I am not going to stress my self just take it slow and easy. And keep my mouth shut until it happens lol.

This beam of light feels great. Still got the other turmoil chruning in the background but its going to have to wait too. I need a breather, and have these apointments to make about the thyroid, ent and gastro (liver cyst), the female issue I might need to send another message to Murgatroy.!!

Rays of love light and peace to all and thank you.

Hi All, just a quick (ha!) check in from Me! Lol!

Well we have Sold our home again (the 1st one fell through in December), and we will close contract on Feb 7th! So packing, packing and more packing. Boy am I glad we did a fair amount of sorting, clearing out of un-needed stuff, and organized in the months before we put it on the market (Oct 31st), but still there has been many runs to the charity donation center and to the dump.

Interestingly, we have even put a fair amount of thing set out for Free onto the curb, which have been snapped up in minutes, Yay! We even struck up a conversation with a young couple who also are "collectors" of simular interests to hubby and myself, and they have been back several times to pick over and even buy a few things, my husvand does like to gab and the Art of the Deal, lol, oh he's mainly giving it away to them, but he has really enjoyed their eager wide eyed appreciation of his junk, as our own kids 'The Minamalists" have shown little interest in his years of collectibles, old radio's, camera's stereo equiptment, etc.... lol! It is all So Freeing!

Hubby has been a Mad-Man (in a good way), and already has the house over 1/2 emptied out, all of the things we are keeping being put into a rental storage unit, so mainly the kitchen, our bedroom furniture and dressers full of clothes, my walk-in-closet (which still needs to be pared down again, and the main furniture and 2 TV's is all that is left really, even our own very large backyard shed is empty, so as each day comes to a close, we are one step closer to freedom and I am feeling Great about things!

Unfortunately i'm still struggling to sleep, and that old "stress related" gut pain is still haunting me, which I now am almost certain is Gallbladder related, even though the million dollar tests I had done back when my FIL was dying and afterwards, did rule out GB issues, I do feel they were wrong in their diagnosis, or lack thereof. I will f/u again after this move is all over once again, Uggg!

At first our plan was to stay with our Daughter and her husband until the right Condo comes on the market to purchase, but now we have decided to live in the MIL apartment off of my fav sister's house. We will also probably fit in a nice drive vacation too, just to relax and to celebrate! We will finally be Free Birds for the first time ever, 34 years of marriage and No kids or Parents to worry about! WOW!

I never expected Sis to make the offer of her MIL Apt. to us, as over the years (30 or so) she has always had it being "rented" out to other family member, or being utilized by one of her 2 daughters, always by folks in a state of flux such as ourselves, except for the 8 years when my parents lived there. After her last daughter moved out 2+ years ago (and left a whole mess of old furniture and junk), she had vowed Never to lend it out again, intending on fixing it up and using it for themselves for the first time ever, so when she offered it up, I was totally shocked as it was so unexpected, and I completely understood where she was coming from, as in almost every circumstance (and I can count at least 13 separate tenants over the years), the apartment was left in a worsening state of disrepair, most definately the last 2 times with each of her daughters, Kids! Lol!

It is a very gererous offer, and hopefully she will feel that the "rent" we will pay her will make it worth her while. Unfortunately Our Daughter is a little miffed that we are not moving in with her for the time being, but we were trying our best not to infringe on Anyones toes, and in all honesty, living with her could/Would have been an exercise in Mucho Patience just to get along, should weeks turn into a couple of months, so I hope in time she will see it that way too, but for now she is still a little pizzed off at me, silly really!

I hope All is going Well with each and Everyone, I have been reading along, but haven't had much to share. Love to you all! Stacey B

Duck, I like the 3 G’s term! It is fitting. I don’t know if any of the good people dealing with anxiety are familiar with Mel Robbins, you can find her on YouTube. She has a lot of good info on resetting our thinking to pull us out of an anxiety attack. She does recommend therapy and medication if ones anxiety is interfering in daily life.
Best thoughts to everyone!

Frazzled thanks for the understanding.

Gershun, dang! My apology. I think of you Golden and Glad as the 3 G's and very wise women. I did try a to go back and get my facts straight before and got frustrated.

I just woke from brief nap tbinking about lawyer and decided to cbeck in gave me a little chukle. Think ill stick to the page im seeing. Lol.

Have a goodday everyone. Im going to try and get another nap in before i get up and out. Phone posting is so tedious....

Hi all, just getting caught up. Been busy with business and house related stuff and go later this morning with mom back to the diabetes specialist, yippee! (Tongue firmly in cheek there :) Psych doctor made another med change last week. She kept her other meds the same, but added a very low dose of Thorazine to help with the hallucinations and paranoia, since mom said she still feels afraid and hearing voices and is thinking that someone is going to break in and harm her. It seems like the last med change (increasing the dose of Neurontin) did help her anxiety some, but didn't do much for the paranoia. Hopefully this will help. I've heard some very mixed things about this drug, but it's one we've never tried, so I guess it might be worth it to see if it helps her.

DDDuck, I understand what you mean about missing that mother connection you don't have. I used to feel the void quite a bit. I think maybe that's why some of my female friends are my senior, maybe I've always looked for a mentor or for wisdom of ladies older than me, and I'm thankful I have known some wonderful ladies who are good examples of wives and mothers that I have looked up to and tried to learn from over the years. One was my first pastor's wife, who kind of took me under her wing when I was a young adult and helped me to have confidence by encouraging me as a person and just by being an example of the kind of person I want to be. She was always so kind and optimistic, and her faith in God truly showed. She passed away several years ago from cancer but she had a huge impact on my life. I have learned too in many ways to lean on faith, and have kind of learned some things as I've gone along, sometimes muddling through. I still think it would be nice to have a mom I could call for advice and reassurance once in awhile, but it just is what it is. Some things I can say made me stronger because I had to sink or swim. You are a strong lady too. But, it's okay for us not to be strong sometimes too, even just having a good cry or a good nap and being gentle on ourselves.

Shell- It is very frustrating and infuriating when siblings take advantage of our parents and then we have to clean up the mess. Hopefully the bankruptcy lawyer can help you and your mom to sort it all out and protect mom from being taken advantage of further by your brother. For some reason it sounds like she feels obligated to "help" him, even though it's really enabling his habit. Is there any way she would let you handle her remaining finances? That way, she wouldn't have to tell brother no, if that's what she is afraid of, but you certainly could and could put a stop to the borrowing.

Golden- Ugh, taxes are such a pain. I still need to do mom's. Those are bout as fun as watching paint dry. I'm allergic to some of the bubble bath and bath beads and stuff too. I love that some of it makes the water look so pretty and smells nice too, just hate that it's irritating to the skin.

I'm glad you're feeling some relief at being able to get some of the stuff sorted and wrapped up. I know it's been a long road for you, and you deserve to have it all behind you so you can do some fun stuff that you enjoy.

I think you mean't to ask Glad about blue glass and lighting not me Duck.

I am still a bundle of nerves. my anxiety attacks had dimished quite a bit and now its back to regular. I have to stop and think of a relaxation technique from therapy and then just say wtf.

I have apt with lawyer tomorrow I am scared and nervous as hell. I made list in my phone, about concerns and went into prayer with friend who is a strong prayer warrior and like a brother. Not strange but as usual I felt better and more at ease feeling hopeful and positive again. I expressed my pain with my son. I never meant to cause him any pain or hurt. I know what its like to feel a certain kind of ache in my heart as a kid but I was not surrounded by role models who were trying to sabotage my parents or anyone.

It all comes into play but I am just hoping to beable to communicate my concerns ands needs mainly for my mother and also my own personal sercurity and rights as far as the house is concerned.

I still have moments about Sham, acutually many loved ones. I keep dreaming about my girlfriend Deb and my cousin Larry. I wake up feeling good and better. But daily walking in that house and looking at my mother walking around, truly babbling, lashing out when I touch her hair or check to see if she has on undies in the same tone and words that I always heard is so painful.

The weather here has turned cold so I put an extra quilt on her bed before I left for work yesterday. I must have left microwave on washingmachine because it was on the floor. done by my sister. This touches a cord inside me now. so I went up and put the microwave in what was a kitchen ion the middle of the floor. I felt stupid to feed it but what else can I do. That is just as dangerous. Why cant she just use that energy and just put it back on fridge its not like its every day.....

So I live this bs daily. Then feel outcast and alone. Then the enemy lays on the special handywork about whats close and dear to me.

Gershun thank you, I am just facing a reality within my self. On the outside I present this stoic, together person, on the inside I am just like a little to be held and loved and revered and cherished like I saw with my sister. I have to get a hold onto what makes me flashback there, so I can deal with the present ripples in my life and relationships. Sometimes after enough negativity, my hope dimisnishes and I just fall in this pit. Got to find the key in myself to stop this crazy merry go round.

Shayrn, I hope all is well. I think of you and your brother.

Gershun, I miss the updates on the house. How did you do with the blue glass, the lighting.

Frazzled, I hope all is well.

This government shut down in US is crazy. Then every dagg on day I leave the house there is someone begging for money in the store, fast food place, subway , laundry..... its going to get worse if this shut down continues. Its depressing. But it lights me up to come on board here. It warms my heart sometimes justs reading posts and seeing the care and support.

(((HUGS))) to all.

Duck, you are far too hard on yourself. We all make mistakes. We learn from them and grow. Show me a person who has never made a mistake and I'll show you a boring dolt. Ease up on yourself.

Ok, so I lost this long drawn out post. To say I had a good few days off. My mother is eating better. That I have been in a different kind of funk realizing the effect who I really was to my mother and sister and the effect it had on my son. Them being the main adults in his life who were examples of how to treat me. Thankful that though love and God that he does not feel that way about me and hurting from the ripple effect of my choices and ignorance.

I know I have got to find a way to get what was missing back then and even now that I accepted such subtle rejection and sabotage, that I didn't see the effect short or long term. I can go on and on. I have lots of faults and failings there I just some thing I could never do or fathom anyone else doing. Not knowing the things I didnt know, I dont know. ARhhhh!! This is life, I just want to get it right one time.

Ali I wish you the best in resolving the health issues. I know paxil (week before monthly) and welbutrin had me in a nice beaustiful colorful place in 2001 when I was trying to quit smoking from the horrible cough after volunteering at the WTC. So many new meds out, so many side effects. Some doctors are excellent at connecting the dots.

Rays of love, light and wisdom to all, from my heart.

tg - hope you are saying "No" to some of the financial demands. With second marriages many pay for their own. Kids need to become self sufficient. That is part of our job as parents. I get that dad is a pain and a drain, and he will continue to be a drain as long as he is enabled to be. The pain part is harder - breaks from him help.

ali - I am impressed that you are still exercising. Good for you. Have you checked yourself for ADD or ADHD. That;s what my dd came up with for herself and the meds are helping. She had a lot of anxiety. Exercise helps her much too. I agree small sustainable improvements are good.

gershun - may be a meds review would be good. Sounds like depression when your hub is away.

shell ((((((hugs))))) - the sooner your mum files for bankruptcy, the better, then she will not be in a position to help your bro so much. Aaargh to golden children who only want to take, take, take! Vent anytime!!!!

Had a great day Thursday. Even though it was minus 17 F, it was nice b/c there was no wind!!!! I did lots of things, and am paying for it since but it sure felt good and I enjoyed being out. Think I have everything sent off to the lawyer re the estate except the taxes. 2018 will not be completed for a while. I have washed all the clothing of mother's that I kept and I think most, if not all, of it will go to the thrift shop. I just needed to be sure. I have two laundry baskets with papers, books, framed photos, artwork etc to go through, and that is all here from the NH. There is a little furniture stored in the south that I will keep. My dd wants once larger piece of art from Haiti, which I don't, so that is great. Slowly it is happening. I am still feeling more relief that anything else, but who knows what's ahead. One day at a time.

This should go in the whine thread but I am here now. I bought some bubble bath, and had two great baths with it and realized I am allergic to it - itchy neck etc. The really bad part is that on ebay I bought 2 bottles of some expensive bubble bath - Crabtree and Evelyn rosewater, the scent of which I love, and wonder if I will be allergic to it. Oh well, small whine. Someone else can enjoy it if I can't.

Take care all. Do something good for you..

TG, why are you going to be paying for an apartment in NYC? Are you moving here?

TG - if dad’s passport is still valid, that might be the best 300 bucks you’ll ever spend. 8 whole days without Dad. He’ll be in another country! On his own and unable to use you as his sin eater when he takes issue with the food...the weather...his church mate. Adios!

I want to scream...my brother called to tell my mother that his brake line is broken and he needs to get it fixes. Like always he is expecting my mother to fix it because she always does. He is her golden drug addict son! She can't afford to fix his truck. I have been paying the taxes and house insurance that she was suppose to pay. Plus, I have been paying for most of the little things for the house. My mother has to file bankruptcy because of her debt that my brother helped to created. Now, she thinks she should pay for my brother's truck. This is the same thing over and over! I have told her and showed her how she has hurt my BF and my finances. She said she was sorry, but here she goes to do it again! I can't take it anymore. I just want to walk away from her and let the chips fall where they may. She is not taking her meds which is frustrating because she is lying about taking them, and I can tell that she isn't! Just venting!!! Thank God for this forum:(

Ali, it's so good that you exercise. I was regularly too before Christmas but fell off the exercise wagon again as I tend to do when Hubs is away. I almost have to have some kind of goal with my exercise or I won't do it. Before Christmas I was saying to myself I must look good for Christmas cause I know how everyone in my family is so looks conscious and aren't afraid to tell you if you don't look good and it stings when they do. So now that's over so I need another goal. I know I should just be doing it for my health but it doesn't hurt to be able to put your skinny jeans on again and not have that fat roll hanging over the waistband. That feels good too.

I become very self destructive when Hubs leaves town. I sleep too much and just get really down and so on. I'm taking Effexor and ativan to help me sleep occasionally but maybe I need to change it up. Who knows.

I hope you can straighten out your meds to where it suits you Ali.

tg, maybe this is a good time for a solid "no." As in, "No Dad, I don't have the extra money to pay for your vacation." As for your sister - does she know his car is on its last legs?

Glad, I was exercising (1 hour a few times a week) for all of 2018 and I'm still doing it. I thought the exercise would help with my anxiety and it does help, but it doesn't fix it. I still have a lot of symptoms. Honestly the psilocybin regimen I did (and will keep doing as needed) seems to have improved my symptoms the most so far. I don't get the headaches -- that I associate with how I experience anxiety -- anymore right now. It's only been a few weeks without a headache but I can tell that I feel much better inside my brain lol. I have a long way to go but it's good to get small improvements.

I want to try some of the bipolar medications, some of the anti-psychotics. One good thing about doing the exercise regularly is that it helps me pin down what symptoms have to be "mental illness" vs what symptoms are "I feel like doo doo because I have a sedentary lifestyle." I've always felt worse when I'm not exercising. I need the little bit of extra energy and agitation-burnoff that exercising helps me to feel. I'm much too tired otherwise, uncomfortably so. Chronic fatigue is my normal for a long time now.


Tg, I think I'd go a little nuts with resentment if I were in your shoes. Your elderly father wants to borrow money for a Mexican vacay without any awareness of how much you're being put upon on all sides right now.

Are you friggin kidding me? Dad calls me today, I am out with my daughters for lunch. One just lost a great job in a big city and is home the other soon to be married but doesn't know it yet (we do). I will be paying for a while I am sure. He asks to borrow $300. I ask why, "I can go to Cozumel". Are you kidding me? Yeah with a friend? Sure I say playing along.... Turns out he is serious. He had his passport out this AM on his desk ( I thnk it may be out of date). Turns out his FREIND from Church had a sniff with another guy and aparently this is all paid except for his air fare. 8 days in Cozumel.
The guy cant walk across the kitchen without holding on to something. I've been to Cozumel, its not an old person friendly place/. He hates the beach! Hasn't said a word since I have been home. Apparently he is leaving in a week.
I am so pissed I cant see straight. He has no money, he barley makes the month. How is he going to do a week in Mexico?
Here I am dealing with one kid out of work and at home and going to be paying for an apartment in NYC. I cant afford to go on vacation myself as I may have to by a car for him as his is going to crap.
Well his car is his problem now...... I am sure my sister will say sure go on vacation!
I cant even see straight. He lives with me I pay the bills and he goes on vacation and I am stuck here..... araghhhhh
I am so done I am ready to leave........................................

Ali, i must say i am relieved! I worry about you, just a couple of years older tham my oldest daughter. Are you frequenting the gym?