
Many of us, myself included, come from a dysfunctional family which adds a lot of weight to the challenges of caregiving. I have read stores on various threads on other topics and decided it would be good to have a thread just for this topic for people to share, vent and discuss.
The idea for this thread originated on the thread named "The Caregiver....How are YOU doing today?"
Dd started work today. Lol!...she said, “ now I know why you are so tired when you get off work”! Her legs hurt and her fitbit said she had 71 minutes of exercise! Haha, I work with her on Thursday.
My kids, my husband and the rest of my family all think it's a little weird that I talk about this cyber family all the time. I don't care. This is my "ground".
Can you get yourself to the doctor this week? You need a thorough physical and a frank talk with her/him about what you've just lived through.
A war zone, for sure. With sisters like that, who needs enemy fire?
The exhaustion is so bad I can hardly walk, even though I've been here since Saturday. My ex (the divorce papers of our 20-year marriage I received the first week at Mom's) helped me unload the trailer Sunday. The slightest movement makes my legs wobbly and I'm so clumsy I'm constantly knocking things over or dropping things.
Today, my ex called asking to stop by because "we have some things to discuss." Suddenly, I felt like throwing up. My heart raced and I could hardly walk. He only needed to talk about the property taxes and our local volunteer fire department. While he was talking I started weeping and shaking. He finally finished, and I just burst into tears, hyperventilated, and I had to sit down.
Took me a long time to get a hold of myself. Bawling, I kept saying I was sorry. Finally I got it out how his comment set off my reaction because of Sisters' behavior. He felt so bad yet he was angry they had driven me to this point. He knew how badly they had treated me when all I had done was take care of Mom's money for years (he was right there while I started her finances five years ago) and he was my sounding board when things turned bad.
All I can think of is "this must be what PTSD feels like." I knew I was in bad shape but this scares me.
Back to topic. Counseling is necessary. Mediation when discussing money and other legal aspects. The more secrets, the worse mess. So don't even discuss with one member of the dysfunctional family, or you might as well tell it on Social Media!!!!
Lastly, today, let us pray for all those who are care giver's and are tired. We all know what we go through. When I ask for help, or someone says, "what about your SIDE of the family" I know it's time to close my door and meditate or listen to music.
I need to create a spiritual environment of hope for my loved one, and myself.
As far as the family goes, we are basically tied to the top of the car as in the old days with the luggage. What they don't know is if we fall off...so does the entire structure which we help to set in place. YOU ARE IMPORTANT! ONLY YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS!
God bless each and all.
I have a really nice rechargeable wet/dry shaver. It's great because the hairs aren't all sharp and prickly when the stubble comes in. But I just can't master the full de-forestation at the end of winter with it.
Dori, you mean I have to shave my winter growth. I have enjoyed the added warmth it provides, lol! Idaho can’t decide if it’s spring or late fall.
Fabulous news - plan a celebration
I even use that gel that is made from soy and claims to slow down regrowth, LOL
With my eyelashes all in curl
I float as the clouds on air do
I enjoy being a girl...."
All together now!
It's 21 C (just about 70 F) here, which is cooler than last week - but supposed to be getting warmer tomorrow. I went and bought myself some new shorts and t-shirts today while mom is at dialysis. One of my friends is going to trim and thin out my hair when mom's at dialysis on Wednesday (it's VERY thick - like, I need BFF's help just to get it all under the dumb swim cap). Dang, this menopause thing is killing me.
On a positive note, I just shaved the winter growth off my legs and, possibly for the first time in my life, didn't incur any blood loss.
becky - not altogether surprised that you are not liable, but glad it has been established. Good news about the nutty lady.
Sunshiny today, if not very warm, but soooo much better than it was!!!!
Becky - I just read back in the thread about what happened. How awful!! I'm so sorry that's happening to you. I definitely think whatever bonehead at the bank authorized a loan that huge without doing a credit check should be the one who has to pay it back! Is that the same nephew who phoned your house the other week, by any chance?
On a brighter note - I did receive child support checks from both my great-niece and her ex-husband for their little girls. I also received a payment on restitution from my niece. At least she seems intent on doing the right thing and getting her life on track.
I think sometimes that I have an aura of either "victim" or "stupid" around me - maybe both.