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I just got a "flashback" post on FB,, it has been 4 years since Mom and Dad's house sold, and they were living here awhile before that. Where does time go?
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Sharyn, Dysfunction can be changed if everyone involved has to wants to makes the changes. I would have met my family more than half way but they saw absolutely nothing wrong with their behaviors. 

Good info on the grants. Will definitely pass that one along.
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Sharyn, I just happened to see this post and wanted to thank you for sharing what could be very important for families with dementia patients. If you don't mind, I'd like to share this on some of the other posts, or perhaps, would you consider creating a post on it in the Alz and Dementia forum?

I think this is an issue that bears forum wide attention and I don't want to "steal your thunder".
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Hilarity for Charity is teaming with Home Instead to provide grants for caregivers providing home care to a love one with dementia accross America and Canada.
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Upset, how sad. 3 people in one day. It’s hard to not feel sad and be affected by these losses.

MsMadge, I always make myself too available on my jobs and end up feeling like what you posted. I’ve noticed management seems to hand hold many of the younger people. It’s hard for me because when I started in the work force, if you couldn’t do the job, be there as they wanted, you were fired. I do see some pluses as they do work more with young mothers which I again did not get that treatment as a young mother. I have just a couple years and I plan to retire so here’s hoping we can hang in there until then!

Dysfunction can be change but only if people recognize their own dysfunction and get counseling, support groups to make changes (providing mental disorders are not involved), it is hard work and is life time work. When you think you are right and everyone else is wrong, change will never come.
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Glad, Dysfunctional people can't be cured, but you know that. They're the gift that keeps on giving and giving.....
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Ms. Madge, It was sad. Your work situation is much like many pre-retirees and younger workers. Hang in there! You know you're doing a good job and so do the people who care for you.
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Don't like hearing about 57 year olds having heart attacks

I'm feeling beaten down at work - putting in long hours at night and weekends and being barked at by management - I'm too old for it especially when the 30 somethings are skipping out the door after 8 hours - I'm grateful for employment but am weary and see nothing changing til I can afford to quit in another few years
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Upset, plenty of losses in a day. Clear you head hope you enjoyed that walk.

Thank you all for your thoughts today.

And dysfunction continues. I had an Email from ts2 this morning. An update on estate distribution. Nothing about birthday, anniversary or mom or L's death a year ago today. I replied to all, including ts1 and AD simply saying I was sure we would all be thinking of them today. No responses. Nor surprised but I do wonder how we all got through mom's service in a civil manner. I will never understand and I know it.
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It's been a sad evening. Two of the women from caregivers group lost their mothers today. Expected, but still a loss. One was a lady I had known from church. One of the caregivers died of a heart attack at age 57. I didn't know her well. But, well enough to know that she had a number of stressors in her life. I knew going into this that there would be deaths, but three in four hours was not expected. I visited the home of the caregiver who died to make sure they had arrangements for her mother. They had gotten her in a nursing home at least for the immediate time. Her daughter had applied for Medicaid earlier in the month for nursing home placement. She is already on Maine Health, so that should help the nursing placement go more quickly. I'm headed out with PJ to take a walk and clear my head. Hope everyone has a restful night.
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Anniversaries are rough and then a sick kitty too. ((((((((hugs))))))
Be sure to take care of yourself. Keep us updated about kitty.
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Sorry Glad, lots to deal with all at once. Happy your kitty is recovering. Having a pet helps to process everything.
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Glad, Sorry for all of the sad anniversaries. Hope poor kitty gets well soon.
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Chris one wonders why your mother continues to verbally abuse you. Do you think she has developed some dementia. Her behavior does not seem rational most of the time.
Is there any way you can consider moving into a group home where you will recieve the respect you deserve and be well cared for
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Lots of painful anniversarys all at once Glad but it sounds as though you are coping well,
hope the kitty continues to recover as i am sure she will with all the loving care you are lavishing on her.
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A reflective day. Mom's 91st, one year since L passed, and would have been mom's and L's 11th anniversary. :( Three years since J passed in two more days. I am ok and tending to a sick kitty that is on the mend. She finally ate for the first time since last Saturday when I adopted her.:)
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My mother wanted a guy in town to examine two Win95-based computers so she could take them to the computer reclamation center. When I asked her why she wanted him to do it. She basically called me an idiot when it comes to computers.

I have training in PC, Network, and Server Repair. Both PCs have Win95 as an OS. She has made no upgrades to these computers in twenty years.

But I am still an idiot in her eyes.

The guy never showed up. Because he forgot. My mother realizes. That she should have asked me in the first place.
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I was 17 when I got my tonsils out and at the same time I had to have holes punctured in my eardrums and tubes put in.I was sicker than a dog and missed alot of school and still whenever I get sick,it usually always starts with an earache first.
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I was 16 when I had mine out from tonsillitis and 6 months later I started having allergies
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I had mine out when I was preschool - around 3 or 4 due to infections. Probably was a sign of the allergies which still plague me.
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Sharyn, I had my out at 5 because of tonsillitis and strep infections.
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Yes upset, the large tonsil issue runs on his dads side as his dad and aunt have large tonsils too
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Sharyn, My son had some speech problems. The ENT recommended tonsils and adenoids removed and ear tubes. Helped him a good bit. His daughter had the same problem at 3 or 4, plus sore throats.
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E is slightly behind cognitively but his speech is more so and that is why they want private speech therapy. Removing his tonsils will help stop him drooling and be proactive to prevent tonsillitis issues
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Hi Everyone!
Yes, all is well here, (not close to the awful fires to be in danger) but it was heartbreaking watching peoples homes, businesses, winieries, and missing PEOPLE, oh jeeez, yeah, it was terribly sad.
Here I was looking so forward to October and it is nothing like I had hoped. Air is finally clearing, Mom is her usual on and off with her memory and I set up my Halloween Decor trying to bring my spirits (no pun intended) up. Hopefully it won't be pouring out like it was last year! I have been in a weird headspace lately, maybe the reality of being trapped is catching up to me and also dealing with realizing my own limitations both physically and mentally which are both becoming more fragile. Doc tried to convince me to try another anti depressant, supposed to help with pain too. OMG! It was HORRIBLE! I took three pills and that was enough for me. No more. I will tell my Doc to just forget it, no more of those godawful things. I would rather be miserable and in my brain, not off on a distant planet like a walking zombie! I will try to catch up soon, thanks everyone for your concern, I was lucky not to be in the close danger of the fires, I am really sad for all those folks. * Hugs to all* I will read & write more soon, promise!!!!!!
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Thanks Stacey. Yes I love these boys.
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Thank you everyone regarding E. My dd has many things to contend with, even more now.
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Awe SharynM, I'm sorry for the official diagnosis, but now you all together, can work as a team to figure out the perfect ways to help Little E along in life, and what supportive measures work towards him finding all of his potentials!

I know you will do it too, as you've Loved him unconditionally since the moment he was born, and your aren't going to stop now, and will probably Love him and his Brother even more! You're the Best Grammie!
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Thanks Golden. It does make me sad. I worry about bullying which is worse now than when I went to school. Most importantly is he is just perfect the way he is and he will learn just differently. He is very capable and abled.

Dd has several therapies to arrange for him now, plus it is recommended his tonsils be removed because they are too large and causing him to have a hoarse voice.
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sharyn - I am sure the diagnosis, even though expected, has delivered a "punch" to you and his parents. When my two oldest boys were diagnosed with learning disabilities, it made me sad as I knew life in school was and would be more difficult with them in some ways. We all want the very best for our children and grandchildren. However, having the diagnosis made some things easier too. In those days, LD was barely recognized by the schools and there was not much in the way of programs. They have survived and done well anyway. E is a sweetheart. Hugs to both of you. Having supportive parents and grandparents makes all the difference.

send - I truly hope that therapy helps you in dealing with your feelings appropriately.
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