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It has been - but it's widespread and so far no actions...:(
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I'd report to news media. That may cause them to stop it.
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I hope this is consoling - I just worked out that we routinely pay around about $5.50, and it's been much worse than that. Fingers crossed your prices will return to normal once everything's back under control, and it won't take too long.

Four feet of rain like that! I've been watching the coverage in disbelief.
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That is so wrong. Ours went up .10 a gallon. But our gas is always higher than anywhere in US - especially during tourist season.
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It is illegal - but you have to find someone to prosecute. And I literally watched a fistfight at a pump because people pulled up to same pump from different directions - one from line to go to pump and the other zoomed in from opposite direction...ugly. My boss just paid $4.49 per gallon for gas that was $2.39 yesterday. One of the line drivers at my husband's work says that stations are posting "OUT" all along I-35 from Dallas to San Antonio and one of his friends was paying about $8 per gallon US in Houston coming up I-45...crazy.
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It's because of the refineries shutting down and is universal, gas here in Ontario Canada has jumped 10 to 15 cents/litre yesterday with prices predicted to continue to rise.
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Guest, am I wrong, I thought in these types of emergency situations, raising prices or price gouging was illegal??
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Texas is insane right now. Gas has jumped 70 cents a gallon here in North Texas when you can find it and every station for 20 miles around me is now out of gas. I guess I could post on whine, but I know you guys understand. Now we have to cancel our trip to see my son at college. And the in-laws are calling wanting my husband to find gas for FIL's car so he can visit MIL daily...
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Ali, I'm sure you'll set the right tone. I hope the reimbursement is quick and painless. It would be terrible if you had to go back over a bad chapter that you want to move past. Good luck at getting it settled quickly.
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Jessie, they're going to cut it away, I know that much. It's through dermatology department at the Indianapolis VA facility. They know he had a previous facial tumor, so they must think this surgery on 9/15 won't be too invasive. My dad's a big baby when it comes to anything medical. I've never seen someone who's so tender and doesn't like any procedure and has no tolerance for pain. I don't know what kind of skin cancer it is. My mom asked me what the previous kind was, but I didn't know that info, either.

Upset, it's good to have some time to get away from the emotion of what I had to remember about and write about in the letter, and hopefully in the morning it will be a matter of condensing to "just the facts" and I'll feel better about it.  I don't want to be emotional about it at all.  I do want to make my case for a quick and painless reimbursement.  
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Ali, Sorry to hear about your Dad. My Mom had numerous basal cell carcinomas on her face. She also had malignant melanoma. There are more treatment options than ever. I hope things go well for him.

I always write letters, get them ready to mail and then decide that I need to delete stuff or add something and rewrite.
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Ali, my mother had basal cell carcinoma on her nose and had radiation treatments. The bad thing about those were there were 12 treatments and she had to be bolted down so she didn't move. The good thing was there was little tissue damage and little scarring. I don't know if the VA does radiation for skin cancers. It's pretty simple if someone doesn't fear being bolted onto a table. (I'm afraid I'd have to take a heavy dose of sedative first or I'd panic.)
(5)
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Oh Lordie, Ali

Can't imagine how painful that was
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Just got a text from my mom, who took my dad to appointment at VA today. He has more skin cancer on his nose. Hopefully it's just a simple outpatient procedure to remove it. He already had a bad tumor in that area and they had to cut away his upper lip and all of his nose and do facial reconstruction. I don't know if he has any extra skin left if they have to cut more. :-(
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You know what... I'm glad I have another night to sleep on this letter I wrote. I may end up revising it some. I don't want to be antagonistic. It's over and it's done, there's no undoing things now. I want to move on, but I want the Trust to be in a position where any logical employee can read this letter and then look through the receipts and say -- give this lady her money.

Sigh. :-) It will all be ok. I'm just a bit worked up over it.
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I finished-finished the receipts. Finished-finished means I wrote the letter that will hopefully answer most questions before they are asked, and streamline the reimbursement process. I was heading out to take them in and had to verify the address, and retiring-Friday Trust Officer said to bring them to him tomorrow.

I finally have my doctor's appointment tomorrow for nose and throat stuff, though, and they are notoriously extremely slow and could take all day to see me.

I've decided that I'll go to doc appt in the morning, and if I'm not seen by 1.5 hours after my appointment time, I'm leaving and will take the receipts to Trust Officer.

I have some nervous feelings about handing them over because I wrote a letter that includes some not favorable facts about Trust Officer's handling of my grandmother's case. I didn't recount that stuff just for fun. It plays into WHY I spent what I did, WHY it seemed necessary to me at the time.

The whole thing just sucks. I cannot wait until it's all over. Soon, very soon.
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Guest, Definitely not the same aunt. Different side of the family. I was amazed at my aunt. She flew from Dallas to Maine with 2 changes along the way in Atlanta and Philadelphia. She had no problems. Her hearing, sight and mind are perfect. Her mobility is good. My brother and I are happy to have her stay with us until her children get new housing arrangements made for themselves and for her. They left shelters this am and are headed to Dallas to look for housing. They don't want to stay near the coast.
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Upset, you are a really good person helping your father's sister. I don't think this is the aunt that your cousin was trying to set up with you (that was a mother relation, yes??) and a perfect response to the you have to help refrain. If she was already in assisted living, aunt was doing her best. I think holding off on an on-line support group is really a good idea. Moderators have a full time job monitoring bad behavior, and you have the in-person facility. Maybe....a phone tree with volunteers, but you are in such infancy there. Taking too much on as you well know can tank a small start-up non-profit. Kudos.
Here's my opinion on the bullying. You can tell pretty quick who is going to judge you. Just don't read it. If the mean comments are there, I scroll past. If you are able to read what a person says clearly, then someone usually is supportive in this on-line bunch. It's long and rambling rants that have problems getting support - or if a person obviously only wants to have a poor situation validated. There is one thread with at least 2 years of how bad a family treats a caregiver and how much he keeps doing for them and how he can't change his approach. It's funny, when the internet and multi channel news agencies started up, everyone thought it would make people more accepting and understand multiple views. What has happened is that we have the option for smaller and more defined slices. You can find a person who supports whatever whack idea you have. Or hates whatever whack idea you have. JB, I could not have done for your mother what you have for your parents. My sister (after our father died mind you) told me that she would have taken him to come live with her. And she was sure I would have too. Nope, and I told her so. I would have helped him find a safe situation and financial resources to pay for it. But not hands-on. We are all different folks here. If you don't like what's being said, read or post on another thread. Love to all of you from North Texas. Please donate to food pantries, or Red Cross, or Salvation Army if you want to help the coast. And hug the ones you love - none of us know how long we have.
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Ali, She's a nice woman. Her husband was career Air Force, She's lived and moved all over the world. She says she always knows she'll be okay, but she says it is worrying to see the people who have lost everything, have no resources and no idea where they are going to end up.
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I can't imagine dealing with a displacement like that at 88. Good to hear she has good spirits despite of it all. Good job, Upset. :-) I'm happy you can be there for her at this time.
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Ali, She got in late last night after being moved twice. She's 88, but was living in an independent senior apt. She's in good spirits and resting up today. She's going to the ortho clinic this afternoon to get checked out for fall.
(3)
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Your aunt has come from Houston area, Upset? I hope she's alright. What a tragedy in that area, so many people affected.
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I think that when posters first come to AC, and they seem to be in a frazzled emotional state, it's best to give them a "soft landing" first, and then help them learn that boundaries are not only expected but can be a lifesaver.

I think I personally full-on whined and vented my way through caregiving. Maybe that's the best some can do. And that's draining on other people, to try to sympathize with someone who's in pain and give advice time and again that isn't taken or applied. Rinse, repeat.

I don't have any answers but I think if we can muster the kindness to reach out to new posters where they are in their current mindset, give them sympathy and support, then when the tears are dry there is a better chance they will hear the advice, know it's coming from a place of caring.

It takes effort and energy to see a messy caregiving situation and sympathize with the poster, instead of saying "What a mess, get yourself out" etc. Life doesn't work like that for most people. Families are messy, aging is messy, WE are messy people, not perfect. This forum, to me, has been a place where you can come as you are, and get support. I think that's a good and necessary thing, but it takes energy and time to give to new posters. If another user doesn't have the time/energy to give, I understand, but then maybe they should refrain from posting to that person.

And if the last 2 comments in front of yours say, in so many words, "The problem seems to be You, the caregiver," then I don't see the point to keep telling someone how wrong they are, just to get your opinion in on it. I don't think AC users mean for it to come across that way, but it can at times seem like everyone just wants a chance to tell someone they're wrong. :-) I don't know. I'm not the most sympathetic poster, either, at times.

Everyone have a great day!!
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The original post was hard to read. I am getting more used to that in these days of smart phones. It is taking longer to read a lot of things now because the writing isn't as organized as it used to be. I can't write more than a few words on my phone.

Maybe I am a soft touch for people who appear to be in emotional distress. They are the ones who need support the most. When someone comes on and has all their ducks in a row and loves caregiving, there's not really much support needed. I can relate more to the ones who are really struggling with the role, probably because I have struggled so much with it myself.
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One more piece of input; when I first came on this forum, I was looking for validation that my husband's family were a bunch of idiots for the way they were dealing with their mom post open heart surgery.

I got told quickly that if I wasn't doing the hand's on caregiving, I should keep my opinions to myself and that I was doing more harm than good.

It wasn't what I wanted to hear. But it was the truth.

The truth gets lost in interactions in dysfunctional families and it gets to be a competition about who is "righter".

The fact that the majority of folks who responded to me said EXACTLY the same thing made me rethink what I was doing, saying, thinking and feeling pretty quickly.

Just my vantage point.
(9)
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Sometimes it is hard to get into the head of the person writing simply because of the way they write their question, I've popped over to that thread and I'm sorry but I can't see the responses to the original confusing, rambling post as bullying, people responded to what they thought she wrote - mom and dad tricked me and now they are treating me like a child and servant. Sometimes the best advice is to set appropriate boundaries or to pick yourself up and work toward getting out, not what the OP was looking for but clearly - to me - the directions people were giving.
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I've never looked at other threads so I don't know what happens there. Jesse, you're right about the computer and bullies. You can turn them off. I don't feel like I've been bullied on this thread. Like I posted before, it's been helpful for me. But, there seems a slight shift of some sort.

I picked my aunt up last night. She's worn out from her long weekend in the storm. She took a long, hot shower and went to bed. I told her to sleep late this morning, but she's getting up now.
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Thanks, Sharyn and Gershun. I can tell she needs someone to talk about things to. I remember being where she is now when I first arrived. I know your words will make her feel so not all alone if she isn't already gone.
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I read the thread Jessie. I see what you mean.
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I just went back on to the thread and wrote the new person that the members were out of line and to vent away. If anyone wants to check my activity and join the thread to throw this new member some support she might feel welcomed.

I don't worry about online bullying much. I know I can just turn off the computer and the bullies disappear. I'm almost impossible to bully online since I just ignore. Or I get arrogant -- that really p*sses people off. Bad me.
(7)
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