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Sharynmarie,

My sister wasn't able to calm down the baby. Her daughter left her for the very first time; she's nursing her. She went out the door w/her sister and the other two little ones because they got flu shots. You are so right, I know these little ones pick up on tension fast. My sister looked rather ridiculous too, w/ an air of she was going to get the job done, meanwhile baby wasn't cooperating.

Get this one.......my sister then mentioned to me, "Oh, this is why I wish my daughter would give her the bottle, it would make things easier." Yes easier for her, or whomever is caring for the baby while her mother leaves for a bit. This baby is barely 2 mos. old, and I applaud the fact my niece has taken to nursing her.
I did point out to my sister, that for a bit of inconvenience.......there are some great benefits from mother's milk. My sister is so much like our mother. I never officially asked our mother whether we were breast fed, but I seriously doubt it. Probably part of the reason I suffer with tremendous allergies, hence sinuses too!

Interesting your sister wants from family what she can't give to them.

Much Love & Light! Margeaux
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Pam your method sounds very competent but don't let emjo hear you trash the bones!!!!!!!!!!!
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Pam, I'm no cook at all. Your detailed instructions makes it so easy and simple. And not so daunting. Ahem.. I have no plans to cook it but.. kudos for you to making it look so easy.
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Margaux- was your sister able to calm the baby? I ask becauseany times someone like your sis is not able to accomplish the task with a baby as the baby can pick up on tension in the body and tone of voice.

My sister wants personal attention from family/friends. She wants to hear a voice.... She has told me that herself... Her daughters don't call her much because she won't answer the phone even when she is home and has caller ID. I am willing to set te aside for her within reason. Her life outside of family has always taken first place... Goes back to how she viewed our mother excepting family members providing all her needs. Sis puts all her efforts into friends and she gets let down over and over looking for fulfillment outside of herself. Family will let you down too but there is a middle ground of being able to provide needs for yourself as well.

Hugs and love,
Sharynmarie
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Sharynmarie,

It was funny too, last time I was there, they have a very nice woman caregiver,
now and it looks to me as if she's there helping my niece w/the kids. She's from a foreign country. So last visit, niece left her newest baby that's being breast fed.
My sister was in the kitchen, roasting bell peppers. This CG, was having a hard time with the baby, since it was her first time her mother left her there w/the CG.
The baby woke up, and started the crying an infant does. The CG, tried her best to calm the little one down, w/no success. Suddenly, my sister bolts over to the living room, and took over the baby. So now the CG, kind of looked at me, and apologized in some way, I guess feeling that since the baby wouldn't stop crying....
I was being deprived of my sister's company. She said, "Oh, I'm sorry........I don't want' to take time away from you spending time w/your sister." HAAH!
In my head, I thought, "Well, but I'm not here to see my sister, it's mother I come to see." I also detected that my sister's nerves were being rattled.

Much Love & Light! Margeaux
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Margeaux, buy a small whole chicken/chuck roast. Remove the giblet pack inside a chicken. Rinse it off. Now take a 4-6 quart kettle, toss in a sliced onion, carrot and celery. Put chicken/beef on top of the veggies. Sprinkle on salt & pepper. Add enough water to half-cover the chicken/beef. Cover the pot. Stick it in a low oven 250 F (125C) for six hours. It will be falling apart. Strain off the broth. Then put on the plastic gloves and separate the chicken/beef into three bowls: 1. good pieces for you, 2. pet meat/veggies pieces, 3. bones (trash).
Enjoy. Add noodles if you like.
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Sharynmarie,

My sister behaves the very same way as your sister does.
Whenever I've gone to visit mom more recently, since they're currently hosting her daughter, SIL, their little ones, there's too much going on in mother's household.
Oh yes, and let's not forget.........there's mother too! HAAH!

I've taken to just showing up w/o a notice, which I once used to do, since I live far from their place. More recently, I just take my chances, usually they've been there.
I can tell by my sister's reception.........she acts cool as a cucumber with me, and SHE, the usually very busy person, finds every distraction possible, whenever I try to have a conversation with her. I used to get offended by this, and until I finally figured this control game out.......it did used to baffle me. Now, given the situation,
I just take it as par for the course, and could give a rat's a**!
It is interesting too, because already two different visits she went into busy, busy mode with me. It wasn't until on both occassions, oddly enough when I announced I had to get going, was going to be stuck in traffic, NOW she decides to show we are going to have a little sisterly time. Last time, she said, "Come with me to the store." A grocery run. HAAH! I declined the last time, and said, I'd rather spend an extra 15 mins. w/mom. Point: "It's always about them." They make sure to let us know that WE are just in the category of being "casual," company to them.
I too for quite some time have stopped, cell phone communication and even email
Besides it was just to hear this endless venting, and HER problems w/everyone.
It just isn't interesting to me whatsoever. I'm quite fine with it.

Much Love & Light! Margeaux
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Linda22,

No, I don't do this, as I'm barely starting to make the chicken bone broth.
Are the trimmings just small pieces attached to fat of the beef. I would like to
know this since I plan to try beef broth also.

Thanks,
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
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Today I am doing well,my husband (Traumatic Brain Injury) is in a good place.We walked several miles yesterday and he was energized and felt more productive.
When he feels good I feel good.
I had a strike las June and lost 36 pounds, am eating better and walk 12 miles a week. Finally taking care of me!
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Try leaving notes where the most messes are left for you to clear up. "Please place dirty dishes in the dishwasher" "Put mom's diapers in the bin and wipe toilet with chlorox wipes" " Mom's soiled clothes go in the bin in her room" If you can draw find a cartoon to add to your notices.
Our hospice medical director was the only man in the house and never put the seat back down in the toilet. Some fuss buckets could not leave that alone but would not mention it to him. I found a cartoon of a kitty it's fur on end falling into the toilet and added the message "Kindly return the seat to the down position" That did the trick. Personally I felt we should be grateful he actually lifted the seat!
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1butterfly-it is frustrating isn't it. I think part of my frustration is I don't know that I want to talk with her.
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I am shaking my head, also! My cousins' family is even more dysfunctional than the one I grew up in. Hard to believe but true. When they come in to visit their parents I leave. One in particular enjoys leaving huge messes for me to deal with when I return. All of them are so into the games...never ceases to amaze me the things they do. Very passive aggressive BS.
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shaking my head here, Sharyn - all part of the dysfun fam. fun and games.
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My sister is not available whenever I call her... Doesn't matter if it is a Saturday afternoon or a Wednesday morning. I quit calling her several months back to aid in my detaching from her. All communication has been by email. She has time to have dinners out with friends... That is great... But never time to talk with me. She does not update me on info regarding our mom which I give to her. I could go on but won't.
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Hey Sharyn - doing well with the bone broth. I put on some turkey necks that were a little freezer burnt and need to remove the meat now and boil the bones some more. I have eaten a fair amount of the other one already and will have a cup tonight.

just as well to not text work

re sis - I guess whatever works. I thought you were the one who was busy!

better get to my turkey bones,
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I did not text back to work saying I could come iThd bone broth n Wednesday if they need me. The bone broth was done early this morning... I got about 10 cups out of it. I am making more so when the colder weather hits us I will have it for soups and gravies.

My sister misses talking with me....well she is never available when I call her so I stopped calling. Now we have an appointment to talk tomorrow evening, LOL!!

It is funny she needs to schedule me in her life. She is just so busy busy!!
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Joan you are probably right about them excepting more. However they are going to to have to give me an earlier shift consistently in order to get more out of me...my bone broth is close to being done..smells wonderful and going to let it cool a bit before straining it.n
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Sharyn what I have seen is that they expect more from some than others. Not fair but what it is. So she made a mistake -well she has to fix it. Doesn't matter what you do in your off time it is yours. They would do better with their staff of they had a little appreciation. I hope the new position will suit your daughter and family better. It is not easy working and bringing up a family - tell me about it. Sounds like the grandson's are thriving. Interesting to follow the eye colours.

Linda it is true that many women work 2 jobs Even a woman with young children who works only at home works very long hours

Have fun cooking, Margeaux. Soon after I finish one batch, I need to start on another, as it gets eaten quickly and takes several days to prepare.

Me -sorry to hear that gpa fell. If he is of sound mind and will not wear an alert, I believe that you are not responsible. Check with his doctor or a social worker. If you are sick you need to be able to rest. He has other options, but refuses to take them. You are entitled to make decisions for yourself and your kids. Again check with a social worker, but he is still competent so can make decisions in his own interest which would mean hiring someone. He cannot demand that you be the only one to help him. You might want to ask that question to the whole forum. So I say it is not still on you. He is competent and responsible for making arrangements for his own care. Basically nothing ties you to him. If he was not competent you might have to notify social services that he needs help and give them some time to arrange it, but he is competent and you are telling him that you are looking for a job and that he needs to find some other help. As far as the house is concerned, what I have read here is that should he run out of money looking after himself and need Medicaid, the house would be sold when he dies and the money used for pay back. It might be worth asking about that to on the whole forum. I don't think you can count on getting it. Better to have all the right information when making decisions. Eating less is good as long as what you are eating is nutritious. Your body will suffer if it doesn't get the nutrients it needs.
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bookluvr- Sorry I missed you writing me! So no, he is blind, and can barely walk needs a caregiver with him to help him. Great Idea tho.

To all be reading to catch up tomorrow I hope.

***Grandpa fell today and I wasnt there. Im trying to be there as much as I can but today Im blah with a cold( again), after I fixed him lunch I told him keep trying me on the phone if he needed me Im going home to sleep and take Nyquil. Yes, because during the day he can have my dad and others check on him so I can be more available at night. Well I woke up about 4 hours later and he didnt answer, I went over and he was on the floor yelling help. Well he wont wear his FREE Alert He has so he can get them to call us or ambulance. He is ok but sore. He needs 24 hr care.. just to keep an eye out in case of the times like these. Drs says hes of sound mind but stubborn.

Is it neglect if I tell him again Im looking for a job and will be gone 40hrs plus a week and when they hire me go to work even if he hasnt hired anyone else? I talked to my dad and my Aunt and they say work, you and we warned him its on him. But yet, Its still on me right because Im the only physical one to do so for him? I know you all told me have the people come out and eval him, hes had a Dr and therapists come out and all cleared him! As long as he has the Alert thing tho I believe. I love him but....

What do I do? I want and need a job, Im sock again from all this stress from everyone. Good thing is Im eating less! Need to exercise but sooo tired but eating less is a start right?
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Margeaux, you probably already do this, but save the trimmings from beef roasts to use in stocks/broths. They don't have the same health properties as the bones, but add nutrition and flavor.
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Linda22,

Thanks to you too, for the explanation about the gelatin.
This is great how we seem to having a whole section about cooking here.
I'm thawing a whole chicken, and can't wait to start the bone broth from it,
see what I come up with this time. Yum!

Hugs,
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
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Emjo,

Thanks so much for the explanations about the fat vs. the gelatin.
Now I get it.

Hugs,
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
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Linda~I so agree...My opinion is that men have yet to step up to the plate when it comes to taking care of children and home. I had to struggle with lack of sleep as I was like my sil...needed 8-9 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Experience has taught me that it is a mind adjustment of accepting what is and we as women make it too easy for the hubs because we feel guilty. I hate for my daughter to give up working altogether, I made that mistake and it hurt me in the long run regarding the work force when I went back. My sil is a great man.,,but men see things differently than women when it comes to child raising, My daughter and sil have a priority that their marriage comes first.It seems to be harder for men to adjust to the changes... but he agreed to having children...it will take time, communication and changes for both of them.
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Just an update on my grandsons...Ethan has really plumped up with little rolls down his arms...he looks like the Michelin Man, LOL!!! He is about a pound to a 1~1/2 heavier than Logan. Logan is gaining well too, last report was 10-1/2 for Logan and an even 12 for Ethan. Ethan's eyes are showing to be a grey like my hubs while Logan's are still very blue...so he may end up being a brown eyed boy like his daddy. My son has my brown eyes....while his eyes were a very deep blue when born...by 3-4 months...they were brown. My son has my coloring with eyes and hair...my daughter has my husbands coloring with hair, her eyes were blue until puberty, then change to green. Funny how genetics work out.
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sharyn, it's unfortunate that (in my humble opinion), the women's movement opened doors to women in the workplace. But in many families, the needed changes at home didn't happen. So in many families, women are working two full time jobs.Hopefully your daughter's work change will ease the stress of working fulltime with two new babies. And hopefully her husband will gradually get used to less sleep, pulling clean socks out of the basket and life with little ones.
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I started my chicken bone broth last night...unfortunately I set the crock on warm...I don't think it will hurt it as I set to low this morning and will just have to cook a little longer.

Joan~That is the problem with retail work....if you are not a manager...the perks are few...last week I worked 6 days; including Sunday...that means they have to pay me OT for the 6th day plus we are under the old contract right now which means I also get 1-1/3 time for working Sunday. However, the appreciation is not given...not that I want constant pats on the back...but when they take the attitude that I have nothing else to do...well...not true...I do have a life even though my life is very simple with no night life and extra socializing. The deli manager is currently working at my old local store for 2 months so everything is falling on the bakery manager now. The bakery manager texted me saying she meant to have me scheduled today but made a mistake...that is fine she made a mistake..but when I see the next weeks schedule, I make my plans for spending time with my mom, what I am going to do at home, errands to run....just not willing to give it up weekly for them. I will text the bakery manager later, letting her know if she needs me on Wednesday I will come in....I requested tomorrow off and not giving it up. She said I was suppose to work 40 hours this week but she messed up...well I will give them Wednesday back...but I suspect she wont take it since today was the day they really need someone.

My daughter is struggling with working and be a new mother. Her hubs is very supportive...but...he just can't function on less than 8-9 of uninterrupted sleep...he gets grumpy and cranky which makes it hard for my daughter as she tries to please him, take care of the boys, and work. I do believe that with men and taking care of babies is something they had to grow up witnessing their dad being part of the caregiving for themselves and sibs. As a result, my daughter has applied for a position within her company to be a trainer....M~F with very little OT and it will be a step down for her.
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Margeaux - yes there is a great difference between fat and gelatin for any animal. Fat is fat - like butter or lard, oily when hot and when you cool the broth it rises to the top, solidifies and you can remove it. Gelatin is the protein portion and in the liquid broth and often causes it to gel when cooled. I believe to get the maximum benefit from the bones you need to simmer (not boil) for a long time - the bigger the bone, the longer time. I have some moose bones.Gary was used to throwing them out, but I made him keep them and saw them up. Good organic source of broth. Roasting raw bones improves the colour and flavor, but not the nutritional content.

The fluid or gel part also contains minerals which are beneficial. As I mentioned the broth may or may not gel depending on how much water you have added. A caution - if it has gelled and you keep it for a long time and it "ungels" - goes liquid again, then it is time to throw it out. Keeping the fat on top of the broth allows you to keep it much longer.

Bone broth is said to be healing for the gut (VERONICA) good for the joints, for inflammation in general, and other things. It is very cheap nutritious food.

Sharyn -they really are leaning on you, but not wiling to work with you to meet your needs. If you wanted to be more available, would they be willing to pay you more or compensate you in other ways? It has to work for you as well as them, and they seem to only consider themselves. Looks like they are managing by crises - not a good thing.
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Margeaux, the fat is yellow and can be spooned/lifted off the top of chilled broth. Then you have the gelatiny broth. I usually simmer my chicken soup for about 4 hours and get a really good gel. It's funny how these old homemade things have a way of becoming new again. There's a kid's book called Stone Soup - I always think of it when I make a broth out of what some people would toss.
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Sharynmarie,

You're welcome! Good, don't answer that cell, nor texts, you need your time off too.

Much Love & Light! Margeaux
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Emjo,

Now is there a difference between the chicken fat, and this gelatin?
I'm asking since I read that for the gelatin to be released from the bones, one must simmer it longer. I do know that chicken fat appears, well in oil form very soon when simmering a chicken, or pieces, and thereafter of course when I put it in the fridge, the fat coagulates, etc. I just want to make sure I'm getting the true goodness of this gelatin. It's very interesting, I just love to learn the added benefits about these foods.

Much Love & Light! Margeaux
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