I am VERY tired of people telling me I'm such a good daughter for caring for my mother. That I will be "rewarded" one day, in some... non existent magical way. There's NOTHING "rewarding" about watching the person you love most in this world, slowly rotting. Because that's what it is: she's not "fading away," peacefully. She's rotting. There's no dignity, nothing. There's definitely nothing good about any part of it. It's soul crushing, life destroying, mental and emotional torture. And I'm facing possible years more of it? Years more of way worse than it currently is, and I CANNOT stand it, anymore. I really can't.