First, the good news: Chuck is doing very well with his liver transplant. April 29 will mark the one year anniversary of his transplant at the Mayo Clinic. He's showing no signs of rejection, is off 80% of his medications, and his follow up tests and visits show him to be a super star. He's back to photographing birds every morning with my son, even in minus 5 degree weather, so that pretty much says it all. My avatar pics are of his birds.
Now for the bad news: I've mentioned before having a surface melanoma on my arm removed in October of 2021. An "in situ" mole of no consequence where all the melanoma 'was removed successfully'. This was a result of having a dozen beauty marks on both arms blow up like balloons after the 2nd Covid shot, grow scabs on them, and when the scab fell off, the beauty mark disappeared entirely. Except for the one. And all of it was not successfully removed after all, as a few cells must've escaped into my body and caused metastatic stage 4 cancer in my lymph nodes, liver, and bones. I went to the ER 3 weeks ago for excruciating pain in my left side where a CT scan with contrast was ordered. The cancer was discovered at that time, and I've spent the last 2 weeks in testing. The cancer is not in my brain, thank God.
The Oncologist told me there is immunotherapy available now for malignant melanoma. 2 types at once, administered via IV (no port) every 3 weeks x4. That's the goal. To turn on my immune system to kill off this cancer. 50% of immunotherapy patients are alive 2 years later. Idk what the percentage is at the 5 year mark. I've avoided doing research bc I'm overwhelmed enough already.
I'm having tremendous pain in my spine, ribs and liver, where the cancer is the worst. The Oncologist gave me some heavy duty pain meds and told me to wait it out until the IV starts kicking in to relieve my pain. He said I would live less than 2 months without treatment so my first treatment is tomorrow morning. The side effects can be gnarly and these infusions WILL kick my butt, he said. I'm ready, I think. Ain't no beauty mark gonna take ME down at 65! 😑
I'm useless at home, so Chuck is doing everything. Laundry, cooking, grocery shopping, driving to appointments. I have a housekeeper coming in to do the heavy cleaning and my stepson and his wife are cooking 7 dinners for us and bringing them by on Saturday. I have to make sure HE'S not overworked during this treatment process to where he gets sick. He's already overcome with worry and shock over all this as it is. I'll ask my stepson to repeat that meal making plan, too...they want to help & we need help.
We've had a lot to deal with the past year, and now my issues, which were there all along, just not apparent until recently. We wouldn't have been able to handle TWO of us sick at once anyway, so this is how it had to play out, I suppose.
The one bright spot I hold onto here is the dime I found on the floor of the ER room I'd been in ALL DAY where there was no dime on the floor. And when the gal was wheeling me back into the room from the CT scan, there it was. I kicked it across the floor to Chuck and he said, "what's that?" I said, "it's a dime from dad, telling me everything will be alright." He was speechless. Dad used to send me dimes all the time after he died in 2015, but stopped the past few years. I have a whole piggy bank full of them.
We can use all the prayers we can get right now, friends. I believe in prayers, in miracles and in signs from our deceased loved ones that they are with us in tough times. If you do too, please send up some prayers for Chuck and I right now.
Many thanks.
What a beautiful prayer put into song. Thank you for sharing this.
I pray for your healing. That circumstances would change. I pray that the fear inside would flee in Jesus name. I pray that a breakthrough would happen today. I pray miracles over your life in Jesus name, in Jesus name.
I speak the name of all authority, declaring blessings, every promise, He is faithful to keep. I speak the name no grave could ever hold. He is greater, He is stronger, He's the God of possible.....Come believe it. Come receive it. In the mighty name of Jesus, all things are possible."
I am standing in agreement with everyone on this forum and believing for a miracle for you, in the mighty name of Jesus. And all God's people said AMEN and AMEN.
Our bodies are fascinating. You are learning things that I bet you would have never even thought about before. This surely is a tough way to gain knowledge on the subject.
I stopped by church this morning to burn a candle for you. Will continue to pray for you 💗.
Thank you, LORD, for these mercies!
I have two dimes for your jar collection.
Second shocking thing that's disappeared.....huge toe cramps foot cramps and lower leg cramps while sleeping or lying down. I just realized I've had NO FOOT ISSUES the past few weeks including having my big toe feel like it was broken when I walked around barefoot. ALL GONE.
Maybe the sacral tumors were pressing on nerves connected to my feet. And they shrunk which took the pressure off and relieved the pain.
My daily 5pm headaches are GONE too!
The GERD....all I can speculate is that my immune system is ramped up now and healing OTHER issues besides the cancer.
This is fantastic news in my book! A miraculous blessing. I read this today online:
"Have in your mind that which would constitute a miracle for you. Get the vision. Suspend disbelief and skepticism. " -Dr Wayne Dyer
"We talk privately to God and call it prayer. So then why does a return call seem so far-fetched, particularly if we believe that there's some universal intelligence out there that we're addressing?" -Wayne Dyer
I'm ready for more small miracles to happen to me and interpret them as God returning my call 😁 Its important to celebrate the small victories along this journey, imo.
The not so great news is the rash has spread to my chest now, but still mild and not itchy.
Hopeforhelp, the Italian restaurant is now kaput 😏😣
My DD met the love of her life and the same thing happened...a strong connection that was love at first sight. It does happen.
ITRR, thank you for your prayers and posting that lovely scripture.
Colleen and Lilmelba, thank you for the continued prayers.
Geaton ty for your daily post, I appreciate it.
...and, I forgot to add that hearing the backstory of how you and Chuck met is Incredible!! It's like out of a scene from a Hollywood movie - the kind that gives the movie viewer hope and inspiration in finding that rare unconditional love! And, I agree with you just how very hard that is to find.
I bet that Italian restaurant that brought you both together must be your and Chuck's absolute favorite!! :)
Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. [38] For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, [39] Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Lea, this spoke to my heart for you. No matter what the enemy throws your way, you are more than a conquerer, you are victorious through the blood of Jesus Christ.
Continued prayers for you my friend.
"A cheerful heart is good medicine..."
- Proverbs 17:22
Petitions for or the rash to clear. 🙏
Praises that your diaphragm is less painful! 🤲
Lord, hear the prayers of your people!
Colleen ty for the prayers as you drove around.
Hopeforhelp, I think your comment is THE nicest thing anyone has ever said to me, ever. Thank you 😗
Overwhelmed, hasn't everybody done SOME praying on the toilet at some point in their life? 🤣
Alva, I'm glad you read my daily updates!
Funky, the funny thing about meeting Chuck in Colo at 48 years old, is that we both lived 2 miles apart back when we were 19 after I moved to Colo w my parents! Same city, same neighborhood. But we never met. We both went on to meet and marry different people, stay together the same amt of time, move around the USA, get divorced, and THEN God put him in my path, in the middle age of our lives when we both were in need of one another. 7 kids between us. True story. Chuck always laments that we didnt meet back in 1976, but I believe God does not make mistakes. The time had to be right for us to meet.
All along my diaphragm has felt like it was attached to my body with a twist tie. Just unstable and hanging on by a thread, due to the connectors being damaged by cancer. Today I can honestly say my diaphragm feels solidly adhered to my body 😁. Sounds weird, I know, and feel much worse to have a wobbly diaphragm. Which has also impeded my breathing due to all the pain in that area. My son bought me a device called The Breather which is an inhaler/exhaler with built in resistance to strengthen my diaphragm muscles and build my lung capacity back up. There are 4 settings of hole sizes on the device, from larger to smaller, so it's like breathing thru a straw. Athletes use it to train with, and it's great for respiratory issues in general. God bless him.
We got to see my grandson today whose 2 in 2 weeks and he was all cheeky toothy grins today. Rejuvenates the soul to kiss those cheeks.
Geaton ty for the scripture.
"Peace I [Jesus] leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."
- John 14:27
And I love the Lea/Chuck story, too. Lea, that is how I feel about my DH, too, including the parents/1st husband thing.
Had dinner tonight with two younger friends. They just got married and are at the front end of life. I said a prayer for them that when they hit the hard stuff - as most of us do - that they have watched enough long-term marriages to know how to keep showing each other love.
LL, I prayed for you as I drove around our Florida county today. May God bless you and Chuck this weekend, and may you feel His peace. 💖💙
You have a GLOBAL army of "Forum Family" praying hard for you for a positive and great outcome and the best of great health and happiness. You are surely loved by everyone.
Thank you for today's meaningful words of wisdom and message - it's so true! Wishing you a relaxing and peaceful and wonderful weekend - and sending hugs!
And I love the story how you met Chuck. What a blessing that God put you in Chuck's path when He did.
Here's hoping that the 86,400 seconds in your days are filled with more positive moments than negative, and that you and Chuck get to spend many more seconds together.
THE MAGIC BANK ACCOUNT
THE AUTHOR IS NOT KNOWN. IT WAS FOUND IN THE BILLFOLD OF COACH PAUL BEAR BRYANT, ALABAMA, AFTER HE DIED IN 1982
The Magic Bank Account
Imagine that you had won the following *PRIZE* in a contest: Each morning your bank would deposit $86,400 in your private account for your use. However, this prize has rules:
The set of rules:
1. Everything that you didn't spend during each day would be taken away from you.
2. You may not simply transfer money into some other account.
3. You may only spend it.
4. Each morning upon awakening, the bank opens your account with another $86,400 for that day.
5. The bank can end the game without warning; at any time it can say,“Game Over!". It can close the account and you will not receive a new one.
What would you personally do?
You would buy anything and everything you wanted right? Not only for yourself, but for all the people you love and care for. Even for people you don't know, because you couldn't possibly spend it all on yourself, right?
You would try to spend every penny, and use it all, because you knew it would be replenished in the morning, right?
ACTUALLY, This GAME is REAL ...
Shocked??? YES!
Each of us is already a winner of this *PRIZE*. We just can't seem to see it.
The PRIZE is *TIME*
1. Each morning we awaken to receive 86,400 seconds
as a gift of life.
2. And when we go to sleep at night, any remaining time is Not credited to us.
3. What we haven't used up that day is forever lost.
4. Yesterday is forever gone.
5. Each morning the account is refilled, but the bank can dissolve your account at any time WITHOUT WARNING...
SO, what will YOU do with your 86,400 seconds?
Those seconds are worth so much more than the same amount in dollars. Think about it and remember to enjoy every second of your life, because time races by so much quicker than you think.
So take care of yourself, be happy, love deeply and enjoy life!
Here's wishing you a wonderful and beautiful day. Start “spending”....
"DON’T COMPLAIN ABOUT GROWING OLD…!"
SOME PEOPLE DON'T GET THE PRIVILEGE!
************************
Hope, wonderful quotes. Not everyone gets to experience Unconditional Love. It's rarer than people think. I had to wait till I found Chuck to experience it in my life. I didn't feel it from my parents or dh #1. My children probably love me unconditionally, I would hope, as I love them.
I met Chuck at an engagement party in an Italian restaurant that my friend and neighbor dragged me to as her "date" 🤣. The moment I laid eyes on him, eating lasagna, with sauce all over hi, I knew he was The One I'd Marry. I rushed off into the ladies room and said some prayers while sitting on the toilet. The rest is history.
The rash is about the same as it was yesterday, so Benadryl did not help. I'm taking a shower here soon and using Cerave lotion as recommended.
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I [Jesus] will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
- Matthew 11:28-30
You and Chuck strike me like me and my DH… we are the rock to each other’s roll. I am sure the thought of losing you now after you guys just went through such trauma has to be unbelievably difficult.
I am sure, though, that your love for each other has reflected the face of God to many, many people.
The following are two quotes that I put together from Tim Keller to comfort both you and Chuck… That part about someday seeing each other’s magnificence - which I view as seeing us as we are in God’s heart - struck me as such a beautiful thought even in earthly loss.
”To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God. It is what we need more than anything. It liberates us from pretense, humbles us out of our self-righteousness, and fortifies us for any difficulty life can throw at us…
Within this Christian vision of marriage, here's what it means to fall in love. It is to look at another person and get a glimpse of what God is creating, and to say, "I see who God is making you, and it excites me! I want to be part of that. I want to partner with you and God in the journey you are taking to his throne. And when we get there, I will look at your magnificence and say, 'I always knew you could be like this. I got glimpses of it on earth, but now look at you!”
Do tell the engagment story and wedding plans if you can.
What a great buy! Those pieces sound incredible!
Alva, there's no other feeling like the thrill of the hunt while junking. Last great thing I bought was $31 in 14k gold jewelry that the estate sale company had no knowledge of. The 3pc cufflinks and tie pin set, clam shells with real pearl in the center, he charged me $12 for and they weigh 17gms, @ 80% of $31 per gram in SCRAP VALUE at the pawn shop, is quite a score. I bought about 22 gms of gold for $31 And plan to sell the vintage cufflinks set for $750.
Tell Chuck that when I had cancer with some positive nodes I tried to block fear, and it wasn't until I sat straight up in bed, let it ALL in full blast and basically said "OK, I am dead and will now plan my funeral" that the fear let me loose. It came for me especially bad at night. I had to embrace it. I am so glad he is sharing it with you, this fear, because that will help. He loves you. It wouldn't make sense if he wasn't terrified, and it is so hard for those who stand witness helplessly, because when we are ill we have stuff TO DO, even if it's just taking our heating pads to bed for a nap. It is very hard to be the support system, something you already learned, Lea, when Chuck was in his own battle.
You know the hearts of us all are with you all.