My husband and I are 39 and 40 years old and have been married for 12 years and we have 3 children and 2 have developmental delays. We live in Texas and I’m a stay at home mom now since last year. At the beginning of pandemic in 2020, my husband began to talk about moving his 72 year old mom in. He is her oldest and only child living in the state. She has another son who is out of the country. We live a in 3 bedroom rancher so we didn’t have space to move her in at the time. Well, about 3 months ago my husband told me we are putting our home up for sale and he’s going to build a home big enough to move her in. He never once asked me if it was ok. She can barely walk. She still drives but she shouldn’t. She just fell again last week when I was visiting her and I couldn’t help her. I had to call her nephew who lives nearby to come over and pick her up. What if she falls again after she moves in with us? I think she needs to go to the nursing home where they have the equipment and staff to take care of her but my husband is dead set against it yet he’s not going to be the one caring for her and the children. Our new home is going to be finished by the end of year and instead of feeling excited, I just feel like this is going to be a mess if he doesn’t get her some home health workers over. I can’t take care her by myself.
To whom is your dear husband married, you or his mom?
Make two appointments this week, one for a therapist/marriage counselor and the other with a divorce attorney. Go to them both and figure out where this is going.
I will let the replies roll in (I can guess the direction).
I am glad you have posted. This is a massive issue & a massive challenge that couples face.
Here's a plan, & unlike your Husband, you could communicate it before it is in put in motion;
You & kids stay in your current home... Husband & Mother move to the new home.