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I am 84 at home retired nurse anesthetist this is my thought , I have delt with problems getting care for myself. When you get chronic illness money is always a factor , call your local county agency on family services to direct you. You are in A difficult situation but common one. Your mom needs to be. placed as you know in a facility that takes care of patients with dementia. At first I thought I could handle this myself. There is a system and they will be able to help you. Don’t be afraid to ask for help, that is their job. The social worker will help you. First take care of yourself express your love by asking for help. Your mom is very special and needs the right care get help and remember her the way she was. G. Dunn
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I have dealt with this issue with my sister for a couple of years. Each time, I tell her reality and the truth. Due to her illness, Dementia and bipolorism, she has to be in the care of a nursing home because at home we cannot provide the care and safety she "has" to have (the word needs doesn't work). The trained nurses are there to take care of and help her. That is what we are paying them for (money is extremely important to her). Given a little time for this discussion with Q & As, I can generally get her calmed down and accepting of it. If it is her second personality (total anger and hostility), I can't really do much of anything.
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