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I am surprised how hard it is but I shouldn't be.
Hospital asked if we would pick him up or should they get a transport, It would cost him $, I said use the transport, thank you.
Family members still keep calling me for updates (husband's idea) tell them to give him a call he would like to hear from you
I still get texts, is he alone, is he ok? I told you to friggin call him yourself and askshe said they would call him tomorrow? Like I am supposed to be so thankful. Their POV is he should be in assisted living or at least have caretakers.
Oh, thanks people I haven't seen in 20 years!
Yes put him in assisted living, that would be impossible. Try putting a mule in a china shop without their consent, if that makes any sense!
Yes, I am still no contact.

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You could set your voicemail greeting as "If you're calling for updates on (Name), please call him at (Number). I have no information." Set voicemail so it won't record messages to you.
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Good for you deciding to go no contact if that's what you need to. No judgments for making the right call for yourself because your mental health is important. You're an adult though. Start acting one. Your family and do-gooders will all have opinions and be armchair "experts" on what you should do with and about your father. They won't help you though. Being whiny and sarcastic to them makes you look immature and like you're playing the victim in the situation. Ignore them. If you haven't been in touch with these people in 20 years they're not part of your life and you won't miss them.

Obviously, you chose not take the advice of the experienced people here who have gone through the same thing. That was your choice and now it starts all over again. Everyone here told you to call APS and to tell the hospital that he is an unsafe discharge and there's no one at home to care for him. I even told you the clinical term 'Social Admit' to request from a hospital social worker. Now that he's been released from the hospital all anyone including you can do is call APS and leave it in their hands.
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Mary, everyone is going to have an opinion, from neighbors, to your local stores, even the mail man.

Ya just gotta grow so thick skin. I think I'm turning into a lizard, lol my skin is getting so thick.

I know this is horribly hard, keep doing what your doing, and monitor your calls , you don't need to answer, sometimes no answer or reply, says much more than answering, you have nothing you need to defend yourself on, because you did nothing wrong.
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There is such a thing as not answering the phone and not responding to texts. I’ve done it plenty. Every person doesn’t need an answer from you
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Is your sister still involved in his care? If so, give these people her number. Don't answer your phone. If you have cell, put it on do not disturb. Stick by your guns. Tell the hospital to lose your phone # or just ignore their calls. Block them, then you have no idea they called.

Have you called APS now he is home? They will evaluate and if they feel he can live alone, that gets you off the hook. You have it documented he can live alone. Tell them to say its a follow up from the hospital. He will now be on their radar. Maybe he will be given some resources. Maybe the State will take over his care.
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I thought you were not POA.
Either way , Ignore these people . Don’t answer them at all . Block numbers .
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Thanks for updating Mary; it sounds still tough for you and it sounds as though there is still a lot of anger. Try to remember that anger hurts no one but yourself; it eats us up from the inside out.
It is good you are not engaging if you cannot do so at the end with compassion while still sticking to your boundaries.
Thinking of you, wishing you the best.
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I would have told them that I didn’t know what they should do. Their guess was as good as mine.

And that he had no caregiver that I knew of if they deem that necessary.

Not a safe discharge … if that’s the case. Their decision.
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I'm annoyed for you!!! Good job telling them to call or text him themselves!!
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