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They aren't your friends. Dump them and spend time with friends who understand and respect you. The older we get, the less time we have to waste on people like this. Do all those things that you had to put off, and do them with a clear conscience. You deserve the best!
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Danielle123 Jan 2025
You’re right. Real friends would be understanding and respectful.
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With friends like these, you don’t need enemies! I suggest you find new friends who support and encourage you. You’ve been through enough misery to last for a lifetime, and you deserve friends who understand and don’t try to bring you down. They’re out there, and once you ditch these idiots, you’ll have time to go looking for better besties!
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BurntCaregiver Jan 2025
Amen to that, Fawnby.
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These aren't friends. You have nothing to feel guilty about.
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I like that. No explanation or discussion.
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Don't deal with it. Real friends do not treat you this way. They rejoice WITH you that a decade of your life has finally ended with you alive and intact, thank God. I'd cut them out of my life if they were my friends, and consider them part of the decade that's now behind you. The Last thing you need now is more nonsense to contend with!

Live your life now, free of all burdens.
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Danielle123 Jan 2025
I agree. Real friends would rejoice with me.
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Danielle, are you SERIOUS?
These are people you call your friends?
These are abusers! What in the world made you choose THEM as friends.
But to answer:
When someone says:
"Do you feel guilty" you say: "Guilt requires causation. I didn't cause this; I can't fix it"
When someone says:
"Does your sister resent you" you say: "Were you molested as a child?

And for the real CHERRY on the Sundae: "Don't feel you're off the hook now just because she's moved away" YOU say "Don't think you are a good person, because you are really a S - - -."

How's that?
No one MAKES you feel ANYTHING. You aren't some doll to stick pins into. And you aren't at the mercy of evil people. Which is EXACTLY what these crones are. EVIL!
Like I have said here and you have read. You didn't cause it and you can't fix it. You did your time, and more than I would EVER have done. You are a human being and not a God and not a Saint. And wow, girl, neither are your friends.
The ABSOLUTE NERVE OF THEM. That's what you need to say. You need to look them right into the eyes, shake your finger in their faces and say: "THE. absolute. nerve. of. you. You should be ASHAMED of yourself."

Now, stop thinking about all this and get out there and get some DECENT friends. LORDY! Tell me these aren't CHURCH friends.
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Danielle123 Jan 2025
Not church friends, but people who I will now distance myself from.

Thanks, AlvaDeer.
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You owe them no explanation or discussion. They will never understand unless and until they walk where you’ve been. Simply reply that you and mom are both doing well, thanks for your concern, and now you’re ready for other topics
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Danielle123 Jan 2025
Daughterof1930, I like that: to the point. No explanation or discussion.
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