He walked into another residents room one evening and startled him. My husband got pushed down, and as a result got sent to the ER with a head wound that thankfully, was not serious. Tonight, while I was visiting, a different wandering resident wanted to go into a woman's room. He refused to leave her alone, and she fussed loudly for at least 8 minutes before a staff member came to resolve the issue. I am very disappointed in memory care at this point, and I think this place is unsafe. Is this typical of all memory care facilities, even though their ratings are good.
Btw, not all Memory Care Assisted Living facilities suffer wandering resident issues. The good ones ward off this problem by having exterior locks on all residents doors. Residents can get OUT, but only caregivers w keys can get IN. It's legal, it's safe and everyone should only place a loved one in a Memory Care with locked doors. No thefts occur, no strange men climb in bed with the women, etc.
It does sound however as though this place is poorly monitored and poorly staffed to handle issues.
This now is also reportable to the MD. There may be medication required to prevent severe agitation and anxiety. The facility cannot keep a resident who is constantly disrupting because that is a one-on-one situation needed for staffing and it simply can't be done.
Work closely with the administration and your hubby's doc now, and I am so very sorry. He is in the right place, but there is no real "right" when the brain isn't working at all. It is so very sad, but your note to us here warns others of how difficult this transition is and can be, and just how little control we have when there is no self-control. Again, I am so very sorry; you must be so worried. Work with Administration.
I recommend bringing this concern to the admins via a written format, like email, and offer to meet with them to "troubleshoot" this chronic problem with them. The squeaky wheel continues to get the oil, and the flies are still attracted with honey, not vinegar, so offering diplomatic concern and helpfulness won't hurt.
It is a major headache to move a LO to a new facility, so you will need to gauge the pros and cons of doing this yourself. I wish you success in protecting your husband so that he gets appropriate care.
Staff should be well-trained and know how to deal with residents. They should be alert to wanderers and redirect them when, for instance, they go in someone else's room.
You could move your husband to another place, but depending on whether the staff is well-trained and what issues his fellow residents have, you could end up with the same thing. It's your call, and I wish you luck.
MC can often look like the asylum of old. By the nature of their beset minds our elders deep into dementia ARE unsafe. Often those caring for them are endangered as well, as may family members be.
I am so sorry. If you come up with any "answers" that will be a first and something for you to share here with the 100s of numbers who bring your same story to us annually. I have been here more than five years, and what we see is nothing less than a tragedy for all involved.
Your husbands routine that he once had in your home has now been disrupted and it will take him some time to adjust to his new one in his new home.
You will NEVER find a facility that is perfect, so I recommend just being there for your husband and be the best advocate you can be.
All facilities(even the most expensive ones)typically run short handed, but I like to think that they try best they can to make sure all of their residents are taken care of and kept safe.
Your husband is where he now needs to be, and I'm sure it's hard on you to witness these events, but you must remember that all the residents living there have dementia of varying degrees, so none of their actions are done intentionally, but because their brains are broken.
I wish you well as you travel this very difficult road with your husband.