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My 95 y/o grandmother lives in an inlaw apartment attached to my Aunts house for the last 25 years. She has had signs of dementia for years and recently it has progressed to her being paranoid of my aunt stealing from her and poisoning her with her pills. She's very angry and has also been hallucinating stating she see's people in home at night. Doctor is aware but not very helpful, awaiting UTI results. We are at a loss how to help her, looking for options and guidance in exploring memory care facilities in the Lewiston/Auburn area.

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"Exploring memory care facilities " is something your aunt will have now to begin to do on her own. If your grandmother has any assets, then the aunt, hopefully as her POA, will need to/should see an organization to help her in placement. In the case of assets and options it is time for Aunt to make an appt with an elder law attorney who can help if she feels clueless in all this, to law out her options.

Meanwhile stay on this forum and read, and use the internet which is more and more a way to educate yourself on options. Visit care facilities in your area and make appointments to understand exactly how it works. Consider the help of such companies as A Place For Mom (they own this site, in fact) who can give you some other ideas. They will gather info about assets and give you some options to look into.

We are a national and international gathering of caregivers, so we would have little idea of what's available in your area; your own explorations will make you the expert on that subject!

Good luck.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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Is anyone the PoA for your Grandmother? If so, this is the person who needs to start figuring out a permanent care solution for her.

It depends on the state, but if she doesn't have a PoA or a diagnosis of cognitive impairment, then you may be very limited in forcing her to do anything she resists. Who is going to sign the paperwork to be financially responsible for the very very expensive MC? It can be $5K or more per month. If no one is at least joint on her checking account, then if she refuses to sign any paperwork, she won't be moving out anytime soon.

More info would be helpful because it will dictate what guidance is given to you: does she have a PoA? What state does she live in? Does she have an actual medical diagnosis of dementia?
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Reply to Geaton777
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