Wife and I are thinking of moving my mother out of her assisted living apartment (there was a COVID scare and there are ongoing visitation and socialization restrictions) and moving her permanently into our home. The thought of leaving her there alone and isolated does not sit well but we are also worried about negative impacts to mother and ourselves. Wife and I live alone, big house, no issues financially.
Are we crazy?
Make sure you have enough liability insurance just in case a careworker "falls" and strains the back.
You are not crazy.
We moved my parents in with us full time, they are 82. It can be tough but depending how your family dynamic is and your relationship with each other, it could be enjoyable. That being said not everyone can do it. Thankfully my dad can get around ok but my mother had both knees replaced and doesn't get around so well. She is also recovering from her bout with breast cancer and has incontinence issues and I also give her showers because she can't do that on her own.
We were not lucky enough to have kids so we have just been dog people - we love dogs, they are our kids. Our infertility however made us realize it was for a reason, because taking my parents in was like have two toddlers. Two toddlers who should know better lol. They will do things like leave lights on and the faucet dripping a little so we always joke with them that now they are our kids.
We do lose some privacy but because our house is fairly big, too big for two people and dogs so it really is ok. It's not that we ran naked in the house but I guess the only draw back is that my husband can't grab a glass of milk in his undies in the middle of the night. :)
There are also times when we disagree with my parents or they do something that we may not do but honestly the peace of mind of having them with us and us being together is worth more than any money and worth more than the privacy we have lost. Plus I don't think I would trust anyone else to care for them. They visited my brother in California for a few months before COVID hit because they used to be snow birds, they would live with us in Ohio during the summer and with my brother in California for the winter. When they couldn't come back to Ohio in March it made us all realize their home is here with us - full time. My brother has 4 kids and his mother in law living with them so that house was full, and I was constantly worried his younger kids with give my parents something. My parents also get along better with my husband and I.
I read the other posts, not that they were negative, they were honest and brought some good points to light but again I think it depends on your family dynamic. We like having my parents with us, in fact we are trying to get my husband's mother to live with us too because we have plenty of room but she's stubborn, she is living in her house she paid off on her own so we totally get it and her need for independence.
My husband and I are honored we are able to care for our parents now, since they brought us into this world and took care of us.
Good luck on your decision :)
My friend told me yesterday that her neighbor contacted covid. The elderly gentleman has 2 nurses caring for him. One went to a party over 200 people and was exposed to covid. This gentleman has cancer. His son was in town visiting. the other caretaker was around as well. All the people were exposed to covid, due to a "party". The son went home. He lives in a different state. I wonder how he went home... plane? car? hopefully.. Was he was not affected? I am not sure. Hopefully, he did not contract the virus. Hope he is okay and his family, and the people he may have been around while traveling back home....
My friend will walk with me every once in a few weeks. If she sees me steering too close, she will shove me in one direction as she jumps away in the other direction....Duly noted.... Keep AT LEAST 6 FEET AWAY FROM HER !! And HER LITTLE DOG TOTO.. too........ yip yips.
someone told me, that if you went to a Thanksgiving Dinner over 25 people, there is a 100% chance that you were in contact with a person who has covid..
I stayed home.
And even if he wasn't affected, he might have been asymptomatic and able to spread it to others during his travels home. Ugh.