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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I've had shoulder surgery. I'm not getting better after 3-1/2 years. The VA is suppose to doctor and wrap his legs i.e. cellulitis. he took bandage off and called va and said he didn't need help. I'm sick of his hardhead.
Pam has the medical background so I'm going with her on this. He will likely find himself hospitalized and then you can get help from the social workers. You'll need advocates to get your thorough this but it doesn't sound as if you can take him back home the way things are.
Please update us on how you are doing when you feel up to it. Carol
Well he is going to go septic and will need hospitalization. Once he is in the hospital, refuse to take him back. They will help you. Ask for a Social Worker or an Ombudsman to help.
You call the VA and tell them of his condition, and tell them you have medical issues too and cannot take care of him. He is eligible for a VA nursing home, so talk to the social worker in the medical clinic/nursing home to get him needed help. At its worse, there will be an infection, and get worse where he will have to be hospitalized. There are more dead, stubborn men in graves.
Following up on what LorrieB said. I had a boss who used the "gentle pressure relentlessly applied" approach with good results, and I've learned to use it also. Come up with a few statements and use them over and over and over. Say it nicely. For example, "The bandages need to stay on so that you do not become septic and require long term hospital or nursing home care." " You are choosing not to take care of yourself. Cellulitis is serious and can lead to (sepsis, amputation, being bedridden, etc.)." Take a deep breath, make your statement, and walk away. You might also call the VA and ask some questions about his illnesses so that you are better prepared for what will happen as the illness continues.
"You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink." I don't know how many times this cliche has popped into my head since I took on my parents' care. You think that the people you know and love will SURELY have the common sense to know their limitations and accept help. Yet getting upset with them doesn't seem to make a dent in their off-kilter reasoning. What worked for my father (and everyone is different, so it may or may not work with your husband) was a simple repetition, over and over, of the consequences of his "desired actions". My father wanted to continue driving after an accident made it clear he was a danger to himself and others. Whenever he got angry about the keys (hidden), not being able to drive, etc., I would simply repeat the facts: That a car is a two-ton piece of heavy metal which, when out of control, can hurt a lot of innocent people. He certainly couldn't argue with that (although he tried) and I wouldn't engage him in any other discussion. Eventually he stopped mentioning it. So, in your case, perhaps repeating the consequences of his non-action (e.g., the wound will become septic and lead to hospitalization) in a firm yet non-combative tone... it's worth a try!
Thelmar, have you asked what he would do if they have to amputate his legs because he was not taking care of them? So often people don't think 'it'll happen to them' until it does. Take him to the VA to meet up with those who have had leg amputations and see if he might not change his mind about caring for himself. I know this seems to be a radical and maybe even 'mean' solution....but he needs to recognize the very possible down-side risk he is taking. Speaking just for me...I would tell him if he loses his legs because of his foolish behavior there would be NO sympathy forthcoming. I just don't get why so many people cut off their noses to spite their faces and then expect sympathy and care....it so sad! Blessings to you, Lindaz.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Please update us on how you are doing when you feel up to it.
Carol