Count his medicine every time I go over there. He only has two pills to take, a cholesterol and a depression. In 10 days he only took two of his cholesterol and two of his depression. My stepmother is not giving him his medicine correctly. What can I do? Family services will not help. I live 45 minutes away and I tried to go over there every day, I don't know what to do if he doesn't get his medicine he could stroke out or have a heart attack. I'm also concerned with his finances. My stepmother and step sisters are draining his accounts. She will hide his wallet from me. His social security cards are missing, they had his keys. There are lots of times that us kids will call and we won't be able to get through. We can't get answers correctly on his health. We got told that he had started dementia then it got changed it he had a small stroke. He does have a little bit of trouble remembering every now and then but nothing major. I am really concerned about my dad. Thank you everyone have a great day.
As far as AD's.....there is also something in taking an elderly person off those, too. They can 'poop out' and not even be effective at some point.
NOT to say that your SM should be playing dr with your dad--just trying to help you to see that it's not the end of the world if he isn't getting his meds--these particular ones, at least.
Is dad with it enough to understand that these are his daily meds and he should take them? Or has SM kind of taken over and is running the show?
Before you go boiling over to dad's--do your research as best you can and find out how dad feels about the care he gets and how serious it is that he take at least the cholesterol med.
IF you find out that SM is cleaning dad out, financially, or being abusive in her care of him--don't go looking for trouble. Step families are already a difficult dynamic--you want as little infighting as possible.
Maybe SM IS giving dad his meds and he's not taking them. After my FIL died, when I cleaned out his condo, there under his recliner were like 150 pills of various kinds. He fooled me good! He said he didn't want to take them and I insisted and when I'd turn my back he'd drop them under the recliner. Score one for FIL!
Don't assume the worst until you have done your research. You can cause bad feelings that will never, ever mend, so be careful how you handle this.
Medication for depression certainly does need to be taken as prescribed, at regular times. There are various aides which could help your father manage this himself. Is there any reason he couldn't do that? You say he has "nothing major" in the way of memory problems, but how does that affect him practically?
Cholesterol medication will help to prevent strokes, but it isn't a straightforward cause-and-effect relationship and missing the odd one won't hurt. But are you sure this is it? - that's all the medication he should be taking?
You're right to be concerned about him but don't rush in and don't jump to conclusions. First things first: what does your Dad think of how he's being looked after?