MMy mother has early stage alzheimers. She is married to her 2nd husband (not my father). A few years ago she wanted to add my name to her accounts so he couldn't touch her money. Before we could get this done he made HIS daughter his POA & because he has money that he wanted to make sure went to his daughter instead of my mother if something hapoened to him 1st, he also made HER the POA over my mother. This is supposedly to ensure that she provides for my mom if something happens to him. The issue is that my mother also had savings of her own that he is now spending instead of using his own money and she is very upset over it. She did not want him to have access to her money because she knew he would do this. He acts like she doesn't need anything yet he buys whatever he wants for himself. Is there anything that I can do to remove his name from her accounts and gain POA? My mother is still able to voice what she would like to do and knows that she does not want him stealing her money. She has even called her sisters and told them about it.
But, on the other hand, if she is too far gone for any professional to declare her competent enough to sign new documents, I fear the only option you have is to go to Court and have yourself appointed as her guardian. Unfortunately, this is time and money - and sounds like there will be objections from her husband and his family.
Please, find a good estate planning attorney in the area. This is a tricky situation - best left to a professional. Good luck.
"My mother is still able to voice what she would like to do and knows that she does not want him stealing her money."
Which is it?
Then she is able to go to a certified elder law attorney and assign someone else as her PoA. But she can't because she has a progressive disease that is causing cognitive impairment and memory loss.
I think what you are experiencing is paranoid thinking from your Mom, which is a very common behavior with dementia. My Mom does it, too. She tells me I'm trying to steal her money. So I ask her, "if I'm such a criminal then why did you make me your PoA?" This puts her brain in "buffering" mode. Then she forgets all about it until her next paranoid episode triggered by fears or confusion over her money and my management of it.
"Is there anything that I can do to remove his name from her accounts and gain POA? "
No, but you can take whatever "hard" evidence you/your Mom acutally have to an attorney who will review it to see if you even have a case. But I don't think this will happen because the likelihood is that your Mom is not giving you accurate information. She's not interpreting what's going on in her world and life accurately because she no longer can. She wholeheartedly believes it and is passing it on to you, and you wholeheartedly believe it.
"...he also made HER the POA over my mother."
Even this isn't accurate. There's no legal way to do it, unless he told a lie to your Mom and she believed it. But it's not *legally* possible to do this.
You need to conjure up real proof then take it to an attorney. If you can't find proof, then there is a misunderstanding at your end.
Did your mother sign, in front of notaries, a document giving his daughter her POA? If not, then her husband and his daughter are committing fraud and theft.
If she did sign the document(s), what does it say triggers the activation of the POA? If her becoming incompetent is the triggering event, and they do not have the necessary medical documentation stating she is not competent, then they are committing fraud and theft.
What she needs to do now is take the document, if it actually exists, to a lawyer, immediately, and revoke the current POA. The lawyer can then draft a new document giving her POA to you. She will need to sign before notaries.
She needs to go to the bank (go with her if you can) and ask to see the paperwork they have giving him access to her money. Then take him off of the accounts, and add your name.
And then, ask her whether she wants to stay married to this man.
Do you have a copy of the POA document? Does it actually exist? What does it say?