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He is of sound mind and the basement is his happy place. I don't want to witness his falling down the stairs. He can use a walker but spends most of the day in a wheelchair. He will not get a stair lift.
I would leave dad alone. None of us want to witness a fall, but we also can’t prevent them, they are the true curse of aging and totally inevitable. My dad fell many times, several times while literally right next to me. Your dad has lived to an amazing age. Let him have his happy place and accept that he will leave this earth exactly when he’s meant to, despite anything you attempt to control. I wish you both peace
First I have to admire your dad. I have a ways to go before I'm 100 and I can tell you going up and down stairs is definitely not on my list of things to do each day. The fact he does it multiple times just boggles my mind. The concern I would have with installing a lift is if he refuses to use it it makes the stairs even more narrow and can be a trip hazard if / when he does use the stairs. Is the stairway well lit? Do the lights come on automatically? Is there a sturdy hand rail? Is the stairway clear of any objects? If everything checks out and is safe then have this discussion with him . "Dad, I know I can't get you to stop going to the basement so what I need to know is if/when you fall what kind of medical care do you want? What advanced medical care do you want." Also you might want a camera installed so you can monitor what happens. And if you have Alexa get him one so if he falls and is able he can say "Alexa call "cookmolly" and Alexa will contact you. At 100 you are not going to change him.
Oh..and if he doesn't have them another walker and wheelchair to be left in the basement
You father should not be going up and downstairs if he needs a walker and is wherlchair bound. What is in his basement that makes it a happybplace. Is there a way to bring up what makes him happy and put it in a garage, extra room or a shed? I wound find someway to to move his happy place and then put a lock on the door. Tell him its not safe for him going up down stairs. Can a lift be put in?
Falling down stairs is a VERY bad way to go. Besides the pain and disability that are more likely than a quick death, the guilt of having Dad die from a preventable accident will leave everyone miserable for very long time.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
The concern I would have with installing a lift is if he refuses to use it it makes the stairs even more narrow and can be a trip hazard if / when he does use the stairs.
Is the stairway well lit? Do the lights come on automatically? Is there a sturdy hand rail? Is the stairway clear of any objects?
If everything checks out and is safe then have this discussion with him
.
"Dad, I know I can't get you to stop going to the basement so what I need to know is if/when you fall what kind of medical care do you want? What advanced medical care do you want."
Also you might want a camera installed so you can monitor what happens. And if you have Alexa get him one so if he falls and is able he can say "Alexa call "cookmolly" and Alexa will contact you.
At 100 you are not going to change him.
Oh..and if he doesn't have them another walker and wheelchair to be left in the basement
We all have to die of something and going to your happy place and falling to your death wouldn't be a bad way to go.
Of course you could just get the lift installed and ask forgiveness instead of permission.