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Scan photos and important documents. They take up a LOT less room. There are screens that can be set up to show photos. But most importantly make MULTIPLE BACKUPS and keep in a safe space. I scanned at least 6 shoe boxes of pics and one draw of files. Not much in the scheme of things but every bit helps. Also have friends and family come through and see what they would like to take. If you have items you can't let go of now but family wants, put a label on the back and take a pic and note it.
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Reply to mikeindc
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My brother and I had to help our aunt downsize and move into Assisted Living in 2015. Then we had to do it again in 2019 for our mother.
The one thing I learned is that once things are out of sight, they become out of mind.
My mom went into AL then we had a living estate sale a few months later to prep for selling the house. A company was hired to have a 4 day sale. We were there to oversee for our mom. They had contacts with dealers, did the advertising, did the sales transactions and split the profits with my Mom. Afterwards, we donated things or tossed them. Mom was thrilled to get the cash.
I'm only 61, and I'm starting to purge or donate items/ clothes in my home. I don't want my family to go thru what I did twice. It's exhausting.
Object that are precious to the owner are usually "stuff to be dealt with" in the eyes of other family members. If there are things you don't want to keep, but do want to offer to other family or friends, do it now.
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Our things hold much in our memories. It's an emotional letting go. So hard. After being left with my parents' life-time accumulations to deal with (they were not even hoarders), and experiencing the enormity of the task, I decided to begin to clean out my own stuff for eventual downsizing and to not have a mess left for my sons. I had tried many times to get my mom to donate things she didn't need any longer and packed them onto the porch for Veterans to pick up. I found she had gone out and taken back many of them. Then moving her to assisted living and seeing how little of her things could go along, it hurt my heart. I too go through stuff and decide to keep most of it. But I did throw out some old paintings and drawings. Proud of that! So last summer my oldest son came over to help me with it. He talked me out of saving most of it again. But much still got saved. This summer he will come again. He said this time we'll put it all out in the driveway with a pile for Veterans, a trash can, and a few boxes for stuff family might want. He said very little will go back in. Okay, I'm good with that. I still have a studio full of very large work that I exhibit and he said he and all the grandsons will be absolutely fine with dealing with that part of my legacy when I'm gone. Right now I have a huge filing cabinet with teaching materials, so many years of intellectual thought and research, but I feel finally ready to throw all that out. I know downsizing is necessary. My husband and I are not capable of caring for this small house and yard, and then we have another larger house in the mountains, which he's been working on to get rid of stuff. He built that house himself and this house we live in most of time was my grandmother's house, so we both have very sentimental attachments to deal with, so I feel your difficulty with this important downsizing. I like the idea someone said to take photos of the things with special memories, but won't fit in the smaller place. Here you go down memory lane. Good luck.
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AnnaKat May 29, 2025
Just a suggestion, if you can throw the stuff in the back of the car and drive it to a donation center, it will be impossible to bring it back. I used to go through the stuff my family put in the donation pile and recover most of it myself, I have stopped.
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I am an Aging in Place Design Consultant - what state are you located in? I am based in New Jersey. I may give you some suggestions on sorting out. Stay well, Judith.
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MiaMoor Jun 3, 2025
If you were going to give suggestions, you would right here right now.
Are you here just to advertise your business?
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I'm a Professional Certified Probate Specialist Realtor who assists families with these situations. For you it is overwhelming. Not sure what State you are in but there should be a Professional Fiduciary Association of your State. They are licensed to protect your assets during the transition and have all the help you will need to get your goal accomplished. If you can't find this in your state, tell me your state and I will refer you to the right people. We have a workable system that helps you feel in charge and have vendors that are trained in assisting you. We are used to hoarding situations, neglected homes, excess possessions, non helpful offspring, and a myriad of complications. You can interview for no cost and find the right bonded Fiduciary to help you.
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Reply to AngelaWhite
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I have dear friends who own their businesses, one is Assisted Living Locators here in Illinois. They will help you out of your home and find a new one that suits you to a "T". The other is Presto Real Estate. Presto helps pack, move your things to the new place, sell your home and help you pick a new home whether that be a condo or in a senior community. Use Google to find businesses in your area who will assist you in this stressful situation.

Best wishes and be well.
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Reply to TrishaAlvis
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We think of it as a gift to our children so they won’t have to do it after our deaths. Also, if you invite one of them at a time, you get to enjoy the memories with them while you’re still alive. It was a pleasure rather than a pain.
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Reply to Jdjn99
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My father just passed and I, as the executor, is left to deal with a hoarder situation in his shop. My brother is taking what he wants, and selling what he can. After that, we are hiring a clean out company who will take it down to the walls and a swept floor. I'm sure they will recycle and sell what they can. Fortunately, there is enough money in the estate to hire the clean out company. Please deal with it before your kids have to and it goes in the dump.
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KNance72 May 29, 2025
We hired a clean Out company after I did what I could in a week and Move furniture . Cost $650 .
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If funds allow put in storage until you settle in new place and release that stress first maybe
in the U.K. we have places that will collect items vintage which I imagine if you’ve had fir 55 years would be and they just buy it from you
Other stuff that’s too much trouble to sell give to charity
a lot of charities will collect
arm yourself with lots of large bin bags
look to see who you can get onboard to help you otherwise
if you had someone with vehicle a boot sale might be a good place to start
just be careful you look at the stuff - sone vintage stuff. May be worth money
good luck
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Frenchie36 May 29, 2025
Do not put it in storage and leave it for your family to deal with
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When I was packing to move and before putting the house on the market, I would spend 20 min each day of either packing or figuring how to toss things. My kids did not want anything.
When you decide, consider donating rather than selling unless you have some high value items. In some locations, you might have pick up from the Salvation Army or Restore from Habitat for Humanity. When thinking about emotions, picture how happy some homeless people will treasure your items. I can assure you that once items are gone, so will the burden of attachment will feel lighter.
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Reply to MACinCT
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Contact some local churches. They will know the right charities and may even offer hands on help.
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Reply to ShirleyDot
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JTW9768, welcome to the forum. Ah, down-sizing. We are close to your age and we are starting our down-sizing journey. First, start with clothes. If there is something that you haven't worn in a year, think... do you really need it? Got a lot of books? I know it's hard to toss out a book, so donate to a library book sale or Goodwill. Goodwill will also take VHS tapes.


I got rid of my dining room set. Haven't eaten in there in years, so why have it sit around only to dust it? I donated it. If company comes, we eat out, or sit around the kitchen table :) Knick-knacks, they seem to multiply when we aren't looking. If I didn't remember where I bought it or who gave it to me, it got donated.


If you want to sell items on social media marketplaces, be very careful. Lot of scams happening. Ask for payment only in cash. The other ways of payment can be risky. Good luck in your downsizing.
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Geaton777 May 26, 2025
Yes, it's a good idea to do a little scam research (or ask a younger person for advice) on how to navigate FBM, eBay, craigslist, etc. - in-person, cash-only transactions (and specify exact amount of cash only, which you will count in front of them). No bills over $20 (due to counterfeiting). - never have them come to your home if at all possible. Meet in a large store's parking lot during daylight hours & park up close where there are security cameras, Large money transactions should be in either your bank or theirs. - never agree to ship anything no matter what sob story they give you. Local sales only. - never accept if they offer to mail you a check (they send an overpayment and it becomes an elaborate scam), pay by Venmo (if you aren't experienced) or Paypal (ditto). Selling on Nextdoor.com is the safest (so far).
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Read ‘Swedish Death Cleaning’ by Margareta Magnusson (sounds depressing but it’s not) and ‘The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up’ by Marie Kondo.
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Reply to LoopyLoo
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Work on it every day. It took my 84 year old neighbors a year. At the end they had their legally blind some come out to help the clear out the big stuff. He helped them for the last 3 weeks.

Start with the least emotional stuff.
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Reply to brandee
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Take pictures of your beloved belongings. Then donate to a charity, give them away, or throw out. You'll always have the pictures to reminisce with, but you won't be saddled with the actual thing.
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Reply to Fawnby
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There is good information already suggested in this recent post: https://www.agingcare.com/questions/downsizing-with-no-help-from-family-493877.htm
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You start cleaning out. You are going to have to harden yourselfbor this will not go smootly. You take a room at a time. One pile for trash, one for give away and one keep. (the keep you can go thru again, you may find you changed your mind. Keep only those things you can use in an apt. Get rid of clothes that don't fit or you have not worn in years. Shoes and purses too.

You can have an estate sale.

If you do Facebook you can sell on a local yardsale site

You can donate everything to a thrift shop.

Habitat for Humanity will pick up stuff and sell it in their store.

If you have kids, let them come in and choose.

When I cleaned Moms house out, I had 4 boxes, one for each child. If I found something of theirs they had made for Mom and Dad and pictures I thought they would want, I put them in their box. Mom had kept the boys sports stuff, that went in their box.

Save pictures and important papers until you have time to sit down and go thru them. Bank statements need to be kept 5 yrs if Medicaid is ever needed.
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