My dad is 88 years old. He is suffering from Alzheimer's disease. His wife (my stepmother) is suffering from Dementia. He has the good side and she has the mean side. My stepsister is Power Of Attorney. My dad has 6 siblings including myself. We have jobs and families so the only time we can spend with him is on weekends. Plus we live further away and the stepsister lives next door. She is caring for him because she does not work. The thing we are concerned about is in the past she has cared for people who were sick and collected on their life insurance and we feel she is doing our dad the same way. My dad is 6 ft tall and used to weigh 175 lbs. He now weighs 126 lbs. She lets him sleep until noon and then will give him a biscuit to eat. He receives meals on wheels but that is usually given to him at dinner. He then goes back to bed at 4 pm. When we give our dad something to eat, he acts like he is starving. His wife is mean to him because he will follow her around. She says he's lazy because he can't do yard work etc. He doesn't know how anymore. The stepsister is ruling everything here. She is always attacking us when we go visit stating we never do anything. He is all we have left and we are at a loss as how to handle this. I thing my stepsister is a grave robber and just biding her time until he passes. What would happen if I report this?
Is this person the POA for your step mother and your dad? Also, is it a Durable POA? If not, it may not remain enforceable, after the person become incompetent. These are questions an attorney in their jurisdiction may be able to answer.
Did your dad name her as beneficiary to his life insurance before he became incompetent? Lots of issues that I would explore with an attorney.
I'd try to consider if there is a logical explanation for what you have observed. Some people with dementia forget they have already eaten and are always hungry. Despite eating well, they may still lose weight. So, it's hard to say if anything is amiss. Are you able to communicate with your dad's doctor? I would think the doctor would be alarmed if dad's health was declining.
It's hard taking care of two elderly people. Try the nice way - be part of the solution.