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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Where I am, dialysis is usually every three days. It’s very difficult to arrange, unless you live in a very small town which actually provides dialysis (very unusual). It requires the trip to the hospital, parking and parking fees, hanging around for hours during the dialysis for the carer and boredom for the patient, then the trip home. Unless it actually cures a problem, it all gets very old. My (limited) experience is that it stops being ‘do-able’ after a couple of years, and carer and patient prefer to face the end without it. That's depressing, but realistic.
I’ve thought some more about this. Dialysis is easier for younger people who can transport themselves to the centre to get it, like the ex-alcoholic son up the road. It seems that many people on dialysis are using it while they wait for a potential kidney transplant. However there is a shortage of kidneys to transplant, and they usually go to younger people with more life to take advantage of it. Perhaps it’s not great that younger people are often those who have done their kidneys more harm deliberately. The ethics of this are really hard to get your head around.
As Daughterof1930 suggests, find someone to help share this burden. Don't ask a family member or friend, unless they offer, but hire a home caregiver. You can also get help with medical transport; someone to drive her to medical appointments.
I also agree with funkygrandma59 about getting a whiteboard for communication. Some home bound patients benefit from using a white board to show what day it is, and also a daily schedule, her usual routine, such as getting dressed, breakfast, Dr. Appt, lunch, nap, Activity, and bedtime. I decorate a white board and a bulletin board in my husband's room (he has dementia and is non-ambulatory) with seasonal decorations, and any special notes just to brighten up his otherwise bleak bedroom and keep him aware of what time of year it is.
I commend you for taking care of your wife, and I'm sure it's a labor of love for you, however, recognize when it is too much or too stressful, and consider moving her to a care home where she can get the 24 hour care she needs, and you can visit and spend time with her as a husband, not a caregiver.
I’m sorry to learn about your 76-year-old wife’s condition. Do you also have to mange her diabetes or another medical condition? What about helping her get hearing aids? More information is very useful!
You care for your wife the very best that you can, and you ask for help when you need it. Have you tried an erasable whiteboard that you can write on what you need/want to say to her and her to you? You have to now figure out a different way to communicate with your wife, as she needs you now more than ever, as I'm sure if the loss of her hearing is something new it must be very frightening for her. So just let her know that you are there for her and seek out any caregiving support groups in your area, and again don't be afraid to ask for help.
So, how does she not hear effect your communicating with her? Is she totally deaf, hard of hearing or profoundly hard of hearing. Has this deafness come with age or has she always had a problem? There are large cards you can get where she points to what she needs or wants. Have you taken her to an ENT doctor? Has she ever been fitted for hearing aides.
Perhaps you’re feeling overwhelmed and need more help. Consider hiring a helper to take some of the load off you and give you some time to yourself. Don’t let your wife refuse this, your self care is just as important as her care. One person can’t do it all for long, especially as a senior. Call your county office for Aging Services and ask what services may be available as well as hiring a helper. I wish you both peace and rest
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Don't ask a family member or friend, unless they offer, but hire a home caregiver. You can also get help with medical transport; someone to drive her to medical appointments.
I also agree with funkygrandma59 about getting a whiteboard for communication. Some home bound patients benefit from using a white board to show what day it is, and also a daily schedule, her usual routine, such as getting dressed, breakfast, Dr. Appt, lunch, nap, Activity, and bedtime.
I decorate a white board and a bulletin board in my husband's room (he has dementia and is non-ambulatory) with seasonal decorations, and any special notes just to brighten up his otherwise bleak bedroom and keep him aware of what time of year it is.
I commend you for taking care of your wife, and I'm sure it's a labor of love for you, however, recognize when it is too much or too stressful, and consider moving her to a care home where she can get the 24 hour care she needs, and you can visit and spend time with her as a husband, not a caregiver.
Have you tried an erasable whiteboard that you can write on what you need/want to say to her and her to you? You have to now figure out a different way to communicate with your wife, as she needs you now more than ever, as I'm sure if the loss of her hearing is something new it must be very frightening for her.
So just let her know that you are there for her and seek out any caregiving support groups in your area, and again don't be afraid to ask for help.
More info would help us to give you our best suggestions for your situation:
How old is your wife?
Does she have cognitive or memory impairment?
How do you communicate with her?
Has she ever been assessed for hospice?
Thanks